Mormons just came to my front door during lunch..... Guess what happened this time!

  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Apr 19, 2012 6:51 PM GMT
    So the last time I had these two cute guys asking me about my beliefs, they left rather abruptly when we got into discussion about what the meaning of a "brief visit" might mean (I wanted to keep it a short conversation).. they kept bugging me. Finally I told them my version of a "brief visit" ... men in briefs! They got red and left.

    So this time around?

    OK, so it was lunch, I was in a suit and this nice lady (it could be your mother or grandmother) who instantly started talking about how wonderful my home and lawn looked. She even talked to Buddy and Zach and wanted to know about them.

    I was very polite........

    I did tell her I was an Episcopalian, but I took her literature and wished her a great day.

    Damned compliments about my lawn, gets me every time. I'm going to avoid that "motherly woman" in the future!! haha on me. LOL

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    Apr 19, 2012 6:53 PM GMT
    LOL! Why even bother to answer the door? I never answer my door unless I'm expecting someone. 98% of the time it's never anyone or anything important. Hell, I figure if it's that important they'll call or pound at the door endlessly until I answer.
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Apr 19, 2012 6:55 PM GMT
    pocketnico saidLOL! Why even bother to answer the door?


    I'm president of my home owners association. I have residents that have concerns and thus the point of answering the door. I wasn't expecting an assault from some motherly type. lol
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    Apr 19, 2012 6:59 PM GMT
    HndsmKansan said
    pocketnico saidLOL! Why even bother to answer the door?


    I'm president of my home owners association. I have residents that have concerns and thus the point of answering the door. I wasn't expecting an assault from some motherly type. lol


    You suckered yourself into that icon_redface.gif

    Who goes to other people's doors these day? Tell those bitches to send an e-mail!
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    Apr 19, 2012 6:59 PM GMT
    Lol. Wow, that works all the time. With a little compliment, its a wonder how far it can get someone to be.
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    Apr 19, 2012 6:59 PM GMT
    Not a bad outcome. I love the "brief visit" story.

    When we lived in Hawai'i, we got visited all the time. The most memorable visit was from a young white guy and a young Pacific Islander guy - probably Tongan or Samoan. Anyway, my partner politely said, no thank you, we aren't interested, your church doesn't like our people. Young white guy: "Surely not. Our church welcomes all kinds of people. What kind of people are you talking about?" Me: "Gay people." Young Pacific Islander guy: "Kay people? What are kay people? I'm sure we like kay people too." The young white guy turned beet red and hurried them out of there as fast as he could.
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    Apr 19, 2012 7:19 PM GMT
    The worst I ever did was answer the door in my sporty low rise bikini briefs
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    Apr 19, 2012 7:40 PM GMT
    I would have never let her get away without cooking me lunch first
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    Apr 19, 2012 7:44 PM GMT
    I had two guys on bicycles come to my house. I told them I thought I was "more man" than either of them and they explained it was actually MormOn not MormAn and my joke was stupid.
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    Apr 19, 2012 7:47 PM GMT
    showme saidNot a bad outcome. I love the "brief visit" story.

    When we lived in Hawai'i, we got visited all the time. The most memorable visit was from a young white guy and a young Pacific Islander guy - probably Tongan or Samoan. Anyway, my partner politely said, no thank you, we aren't interested, your church doesn't like our people. Young white guy: "Surely not. Our church welcomes all kinds of people. What kind of people are you talking about?" Me: "Gay people." Young Pacific Islander guy: "Kay people? What are kay people? I'm sure we like kay people too." The young white guy turned beet red and hurried them out of there as fast as he could.


    Hahaha.. poor white guy...

    I was told down in Hawai'i that a great deal of the Pacific islanders decided to convert to Mormonism because it offered them a way out of the islands... and many wound up in Honolulu and O'ahu in general... finally! A big city! but I also found their culture to be so open about sexuality, including homosexuality, the white guy must have a hard time getting them to be convinced we should be shunned like the devil himself
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    Apr 19, 2012 7:51 PM GMT
    dont think ive ever seen a mormon before.. besides on tv
  • dancedancekj

    Posts: 1761

    Apr 19, 2012 7:52 PM GMT
    I finally got the Jehovah Witnesses to stop littering my doorstep with their ridiculous pamphlets and bothering me with their visits. Answering shirtless and giving a curt "I'm not interested, have a wonderful day" seemed to do the trick.
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    Apr 19, 2012 7:57 PM GMT
    It could be 100 degrees in the shade and these guys would show up on their bicycles in white shirts and ties. I felt almost obligated to pass a few pleasantries with them on the porch. The old lady across the street would let them inside and they'd stay for a couple hours. I don't know what the hell was going on over there.
  • calibro

    Posts: 8888

    Apr 19, 2012 8:02 PM GMT
    so chris, if i show up at your door in briefs and compliment your lawn, can i come in?
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    Apr 19, 2012 8:05 PM GMT
    I think next time I come across a pedantic Mormon, I may just ask him:
    (1) If he believes 100% in the Book of Mormon
    (2) Ask him to interpret 2nd Nephi, Chapter 5, Verse 21 icon_rolleyes.gif
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    Apr 19, 2012 8:16 PM GMT
    I do NOT appreciate unannounced uninvited visitors, but the few times that it happened, they are so very nice and polite that I find it impossible to be mean to them. And why oh why are they always so cute?
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    Apr 19, 2012 8:21 PM GMT
    I don't think it was Mormons even though we had a relatively large population of them in LA. I think it was Jehovah Witnesses, but yes, black or dark pants and white shirts and ties on bikes.
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    Apr 19, 2012 9:00 PM GMT
    Final_Fantasy saidI(2) Ask him to interpret 2nd Nephi, Chapter 5, Verse 21 icon_rolleyes.gif


    What do you expect from a 'bible' where the "founder" interpreted it by reading stones placed inside of his hat and sticking his face in it?icon_rolleyes.gif
    Probably inhaled too much hair spray!
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    Harris' description concurs with that of David Whitmer, another one of the three witnesses whose testimony appears at the front of the Book of Mormon. Whitmer details exactly how the stone produced the English interpretation. On page 12 of his book An Address to All Believers in Christ, Whitmer wrote,

    "I will now give you a description of the manner in which the Book of Mormon was translated. Joseph Smith would put the seer stone into a hat, and put his face in the hat, drawing it closely around his face to exclude the light; and in the darkness the spiritual light would shine. A piece of something resembling parchment would appear, and under it was the interpretation in English. Brother Joseph would read off the English to Oliver Cowdery, who was his principal scribe, and when it was written down and repeated to brother Joseph to see if it was correct, then it would disappear, and another character with the interpretation would appear. Thus the Book of Mormon was translated by the gift and power of God, and not by any power of man."
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    Apr 19, 2012 9:03 PM GMT
    Coach_Mike saidI had two guys on bicycles come to my house. I told them I thought I was "more man" than either of them and they explained it was actually MormOn not MormAn and my joke was stupid.


    Hah! I thought it was funny.

    Living in Phoenix, I know plenty of Mormons and ex-Mormons. We had a roast for one of my closest friends, who is Mormon. I did plenty of Mormon jokes in my bit, but my favorite one was (he's a heavy guy)...

    You know how Mormons wear magic underwear? Darin's so fat he wears magic sweat pants.
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    Apr 19, 2012 9:08 PM GMT
    StudlyScrewRite said
    Final_Fantasy saidI(2) Ask him to interpret 2nd Nephi, Chapter 5, Verse 21 icon_rolleyes.gif


    What do you expect from a 'bible' where the "founder" interpreted it by reading stones placed inside of his hat and sticking his face in it?icon_rolleyes.gif
    Probably inhaled too much hair spray!
    icon_wink.gif


    Harris' description concurs with that of David Whitmer, another one of the three witnesses whose testimony appears at the front of the Book of Mormon. Whitmer details exactly how the stone produced the English interpretation. On page 12 of his book An Address to All Believers in Christ, Whitmer wrote,

    "I will now give you a description of the manner in which the Book of Mormon was translated. Joseph Smith would put the seer stone into a hat, and put his face in the hat, drawing it closely around his face to exclude the light; and in the darkness the spiritual light would shine. A piece of something resembling parchment would appear, and under it was the interpretation in English. Brother Joseph would read off the English to Oliver Cowdery, who was his principal scribe, and when it was written down and repeated to brother Joseph to see if it was correct, then it would disappear, and another character with the interpretation would appear. Thus the Book of Mormon was translated by the gift and power of God, and not by any power of man."


    I was going more for "What do you expect from a 'bible' where the "founder" was racist, lol~ But the stones and the hat of course makes it even more crazy. Almost like Donnie & Marie Osmond in this video:

  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Apr 19, 2012 9:14 PM GMT
    calibro saidso chris, if i show up at your door in briefs and compliment your lawn, can i come in?



    You know you'd be welcomed.. no doubt a 2nd chapter in the "brief story"...

    LOL
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Apr 19, 2012 9:16 PM GMT
    freedomisntfree saidI do NOT appreciate unannounced uninvited visitors, but the few times that it happened, they are so very nice and polite that I find it impossible to be mean to them. And why oh why are they always so cute?



    Well you'd be damned nice if I showed up at your place.. and if you weren't I'd slap a half dozen Obama stickers on your place on the way out!!!!!


    LOL!!
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    Apr 19, 2012 9:43 PM GMT
    I love those mormon boys. I always flirt openly with them as they tell me their good news. If they got the balls, I'll let them right in... too bad they flake out and change their minds. What a waste. icon_confused.gif
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    Apr 19, 2012 9:48 PM GMT
    I don't get many Mormons coming to my door, but I would rather have them come than the Jehovah's. Mormons are cuter than Jehovah's.
  • vintovka

    Posts: 588

    Apr 19, 2012 9:54 PM GMT
    Was the lady a Mormon? I've never heard of Mormon women going door to door--it's usually the younger guys on a 'mission'.