This is why you should ask for DOCUMENTATION before you have sex

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 20, 2012 4:53 AM GMT
    Don't just ask them. Ask to see their results. That way you don't get fooled by people like this guy who just plan to lie. Pic taken last year fyi.

    IMG_6529.png


    So this guy decided last minute to disclose his HIV status to me right before we hooked up. Playing cool, I was like "well what's your CD4 and viral load"...his answers we not good. I said sorry too much a risk and he got so pissed at me, telling me I don't know shit about HIV. This picture of the long conversation pretty much encapsulates why people are going to lie about their status.

    Anyway, I'm sure some one out there on RJ is an idiot and will start a flame war from my post. Can't wait!

    important edit: I don't mean any disrespect to people who are HIV positive and disclose it. There's a lot of POS people on RJ and I don't want them to feel alienated or belittled based off my intentions from this thread.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 20, 2012 4:57 AM GMT
    Stephen-Colbert-Popcorn.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 20, 2012 5:29 AM GMT
    I imagine it would look something like this...

    24y4n88jpg.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 20, 2012 7:12 AM GMT
    jmusmc85 saidI imagine it would look something like this...

    24y4n88jpg.gif


    HAHHAHAHAHAHHAAH.

    This thread is now solved.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 20, 2012 1:43 PM GMT
    JakeBenson saidDon't just ask them. Ask to see their results. That way you don't get fooled by people like this guy who just plan to lie. Pic taken last year fyi.

    IMG_6529.png


    So this guy decided last minute to disclose his HIV status to me right before we hooked up. Playing cool, I was like "well what's your CD4 and viral load"...his answers we not good. I said sorry too much a risk and he got so pissed at me, telling me I don't know shit about HIV. This picture of the long conversation pretty much encapsulates why people are going to lie about their status.

    Anyway, I'm sure some one out there on RJ is an idiot and will start a flame war from my post. Can't wait!
    Guess it was YOU who fucked up!
    Moonhawk is absolutely correct!icon_wink.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 20, 2012 2:02 PM GMT
    JakeBenson saidDon't just ask them. Ask to see their results. That way you don't get fooled by people like this guy who just plan to lie. Pic taken last year fyi.

    IMG_6529.png


    Haha. Kinda off topic, but I love that you have "Milan Grindr"... that's how I keep track of some guys too: a name and where I met them. One day my mother was using my phone and asked, "Who are these guys named A4A?"

    Awkward lies commenced icon_lol.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 20, 2012 7:15 PM GMT
    2 Grindr based flame wars at the same time... I dont think RJ can handle it... sorry dude
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 20, 2012 7:17 PM GMT
    What is the point? Guys that hook up all the time could have been infected the day after they tested and the day before you hook up with them.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 20, 2012 7:19 PM GMT
    mayBbignow said
    dudewithabeard said2 Grindr based flame wars at the same time... I dont think RJ can handle it... sorry dude


    It can, trust me. When you reach about 2000 posts, you'll see.


    I look forward to the day when I hit 2000 posts, but hell, I am having a hell of a time just getting to 1000 icon_sad.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 20, 2012 7:22 PM GMT
    Alpha13 saidWhat is the point? Guys that hook up all the time could have been infected the day after they tested and the day before you hook up with them.
    Exactly!!!!!!

    I'm always baffled as to how that logic escapes most people.

    After your HIV test is taken and upto the subsequent sexual encounter you are HIV-. After that your status is 'dont know'. Even if you had safer sex.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 20, 2012 7:26 PM GMT
    If you're not prepared to have casual sex with someone who may be HIV+ (whether or not they know themselves) then you shouldn't be hooking up with anyone. Just think about all of the other people you've had one-nighters with whose HIV status you couldn't verify...but you slept with anyway...presumably safely. Why is actually knowing any different?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 20, 2012 7:44 PM GMT
    Lucky he told you before you hooked up many have not, and are not so open and honest about their HIV- status. As they would rather put your life at risk, then let their dick miss out on some fun.

    After all the mates I lost in the 1980s and 90s, I do have to conclude a gun to the head would be kinder; oh but then they would also be expected to pay for their actions then too.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 20, 2012 7:48 PM GMT
    jmusmc85 saidI imagine it would look something like this...

    24y4n88jpg.gif


    Love it, Love it
  • Montague

    Posts: 5205

    Apr 20, 2012 7:49 PM GMT
    Which reminds me..
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 20, 2012 7:59 PM GMT
    Larkin said
    JakeBenson saidDon't just ask them. Ask to see their results. That way you don't get fooled by people like this guy who just plan to lie. Pic taken last year fyi.

    IMG_6529.png


    Haha. Kinda off topic, but I love that you have "Milan Grindr"... that's how I keep track of some guys too: a name and where I met them. One day my mother was using my phone and asked, "Who are these guys named A4A?"

    Awkward lies commenced icon_lol.gif


    I had the same experience with my mother....She saw me getting quiet and turning red and said "you know what...I don't need to know everything" and handed my phone back to me. lol
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 20, 2012 7:59 PM GMT
    Sex police: Show me your papers.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 20, 2012 8:12 PM GMT
    Just because someone has been tested negative doesn't mean they don't have HIV.

    The chance an HIV antibody test fails to pick up an infection at a given post-exposure time point
    3 Week -ve
    1/2
    6 Week -ve
    1/20
    12 Week -ve
    1/200
    24 Week -ve
    1/1000

    Even after 3 months there's still a 1/200 chance of it not being picked up.

    Play safe, always!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 20, 2012 8:13 PM GMT

    Wow sounds like you dodged a bullet with that one.


    Why are you hooking up anyway?

    Surely Jake you can find a gentleman friend to have and hold a regular basis....
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 20, 2012 8:32 PM GMT
    Call me an old romantic, but when it gets to the stage I start demanding paperwork before an amorous encounter, I think I will just give up on the whole idea.
  • swimbikerun

    Posts: 2835

    Apr 20, 2012 8:33 PM GMT
    tanlejos said
    Wow sounds like you dodged a bullet with that one.


    Why are you hooking up anyway?

    Surely Jake you can find a gentleman friend to have and hold a regular basis....
    I have met Jake personally and can attest to the fact that he's a very nice and handsome man.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 20, 2012 8:41 PM GMT
    swimbikerun said I have met Jake personally and can attest to the fact that he's a very nice and handsome man.


    I am sure he is, but do you have documentary evidence?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 20, 2012 8:44 PM GMT
    7Famark saidSex police: Show me your papers.


    Yes, officer. They're in here...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 20, 2012 9:01 PM GMT
    showme said
    7Famark saidSex police: Show me your papers.


    Yes, officer orificer. They're in here...


    Fixed that for you icon_razz.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 20, 2012 9:16 PM GMT
    I think using a condom would be far more important than knowing someone's test results.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 20, 2012 9:17 PM GMT
    WOW! Sorry you had to go through that, Jake. As funny as that ordeal probably was I think in the long run you did the right thing by being active and smart enough to ask AND see what his deal was.

    For him to say that you don't know anything about AIDS is laughable considering his response, which would have me believing that it was he who didn't know much about his own disease. Basically, he sounds like a jaded carrier with low morals. His first mistake about the whole thing was withholding information til the very last minute (IMO). Acts like that just raise all sorts of red flags. It's good that he told you but him telling you lat minute before you do the deed is too close to him not telling/showing you at all. That's dangerous.

    To top it off, (LOL), his attitude when he actually tries to justify his reasoning in omitting his status simply because it's a hook up is ridiculous? "Why should I play safe? Don't need to tell my status when I hook up."That kind of attitude is probably why and how he got infected in the first place and he's doing a repeat of the ill deal he got. Scandalous.

    In any case, glad you are safe and from now on I hope you take things a little slower. My motto is trust but verify.

    To answer a question that someone asked about what the difference is between knowing and not knowing someone's status. It all boils down to having the right to choose. It's a conscious thing and people like having options when they know certain things.