FORUMS > All Things Gay Forum Rules

I'm 41, and I can honestly say, I've never felt better about myself or been happier in my entire life. I've worked very hard to be where I am. And I think I look damned good for being my age.

In looking at other sites, as well as RJ, I have come across profiles (some of people I know personally) that I don't think post their real age. Some, whom I don't know, just seem to be a VERY "mature" 28, for example. Some that I do know (and know the real age) post their age as 5-10 years younger than I know they are!

I saw a posting on Craigslist, for example. A "24 year old" was looking for a hook-up. His picture was CLEARLY not that of a 24 year old. He had wrinkles, age spots and more gray hair than I do!

Why do men, especially gay men, do this? Is it the "life is over after 40" stigma? What drives us to try to hold on to youth?? Because, I have to be honest....for some, it just ain't workin'!

Honestly, how do you feel about your age? Do you fudge the truth, even just a little?

our culture is so youth-obsessed everybody strives to be younger than they really are and maybe we just don't see many positive images of middle-aged gay men that we can ispire to become (we prolly think 40-something = dirty old man)

...anyway i feel good 'bout my age... especially when people tell me i look a lot younger and i look better than i ever have (i am 38 btw)... if anything my only regret would be that i didn't start taking care of myself earlier and i neva lie bout my age

I plan on being 21 for the next 4 years, 25 for the 5-10 after that, depending on the revolutions in Botox.


Age is irrelevant, raw sexual magnetism isn't

I seem to attract the opposite on sites like these. I'm not saying it's happened to me here yet, but I get a number of highschool kids trying to pose as 20+. A) I can't stand that kind of lie, makes ME feel dirty and B) I already went through the teenaged angst thing, don't need it from someone else.

That being said, I know I don't look 20 (16-17, tops), and that bothers me more than my actual age.

I never lie about my age because I have a naturally youthful appearance, and I get a kick out of looking so much younger than my age.

I'm 28...i feel bleh about it...meither here nor there. When ppl tell me i look younger...i get happy

I'm forty-two. It's like being twenty-one, only twice as good.

Mighty_Q saidHonestly, how do you feel about your age? Do you fudge the truth, even just a little?

I've pretty much never looked my age.
I've been mistaken for late 20s on numerous occasions, and I like to foster this image at times by leaving a few days growth of facial hair. A phlebotomist with a beard seems to put patients at ease. *shrugs shoulders*

Well...I don't mind the number just the changes in my social environment.

My straight friends have families with older children that require more time so our friendships suffer.

My gay friends have mostly moved to the west coast or died. Trying to meet new people, in my city is difficult because at my age many social cliques are established. Thus, making it difficult to make friends.

It's an easier effort to just be my own friend.

I'm fine with it, aside from the annoyance of injuries taking five times longer to heal (I used to injure myself a lot more often when I was young and dumb, but I'd heal virtually overnight).

But I'm a little tired of everyone else's reaction to my age. For example, the other day I received this e-mail:

"You are remarkably well preserved, if in fact you are 51."

That was the entire e-mail. I couldn't tell if the idiot was trying to give me a compliment (by telling me something you'd usually hear in the Egyptian room of the British Museum), accusing me of lying about my age, or accusing me of using phony pictures.

If I get as ripped as the guy above me, who is only 5 year younger than I am, then maybe I will feel better about my age. But right now I am a just happy that I am not dead, I guess.

lol 41, your OLD!! (haha j/k). That's great that you're happy about your age. Remember, you are only as old as you feel... or whatever

Anyways, the next time someone bugs you about your age, tell them that you aren't 41, just 18 with 23 years of experience.

I'm kinda the opposite. I'm 21 but trapped in a 15 year old body

I am fine with my age as well. I do hate the back-handed compliments from younger guys who say something to the effect of "you look hot for your age." I am usually mistaken for much younger than I am and I milk it for all it's worth.
Curiously, my "gay mom" told me that I have the body of a 16 year old--and it wasn't a compliment. Apparantly I am too skinny in his eyes. Oye.

fitguymike saidsomething to the effect of "you look hot for your age."

Mikey, do not let that get to you, we all know you look hot for ANY age

I'm OK with my age except like other guys mentioned, I heal slower from injuries.

I do notice however, as far as Gay guys though, when people know your age (late 30's plus) there is a kind of avoidance. It may be because a lot of Gay guys really want to have the option of a friendship tuning sexual or dating thing in which they want younger.

You can't really cry about it though because as long as I have been "out" a lot of Gay guys seem to be focused on some kind of ideal (big/ripped muscles, big dick, model looks etc) so why should age be any different? Even when some guys say they are only looking for friends you can still see that mechanism in action. SO, I am grateful for whatever friends I can make as I get older.

All that being said, I like the perspective being older gives me.

Age is only a Number?

So before number's were invented what?????????????/

Mighty_Q saidI'm 41, and I can honestly say, I've never felt better about myself or been happier in my entire life. I've worked very hard to be where I am. And I think I look damned good for being my age.

In looking at other sites, as well as RJ, I have come across profiles (some of people I know personally) that I don't think post their real age. Some, whom I don't know, just seem to be a VERY "mature" 28, for example. Some that I do know (and know the real age) post their age as 5-10 years younger than I know they are!

I saw a posting on Craigslist, for example. A "24 year old" was looking for a hook-up. His picture was CLEARLY not that of a 24 year old. He had wrinkles, age spots and more gray hair than I do!

Why do men, especially gay men, do this? Is it the "life is over after 40" stigma? What drives us to try to hold on to youth?? Because, I have to be honest....for some, it just ain't workin'!

Honestly, how do you feel about your age? Do you fudge the truth, even just a little?

You look great and thats all that counts!

I'm 22, I'm young. I look older than I am. I usually get people guessing dead on that I'm 22,23 or that I'm 26. I like my age right now but I'm definitely looking forward to being 25 which I think is basically the age of physical perfection for guys. I guess we'll see if that's true in 3 years.
_d

HURLEY saidI like my age right now but I'm definitely looking forward to being 25 which I think is basically the age of physical perfection for guys. _d

lol, well don't push it! you look great. I don't think you will really look older in 3 years. For my pictures from the last 10 years, people have a hard time telling what my age was in each of them, except I have gotten more muscular as I have gotten older.

Life is great at 50 -- never felt better, more full of life, and energetic. Besides, not a damn thing you can do about getting older -- something we ALL have in common -- so may as well just roll with it. Yeeeeee-haaaaaa!

CuriousJockAZ saidLife is great at 50 -- never felt better, more full of life, and energetic.

Don't you mean "more full of pep?" The proper term of someone over 49 is "pep." Coupled with a fist pump.

I feel fine about my age of 42. However, I do not like the way I'm treated sometimes when I say how old I am. Even so, I do not lie about my age. I just don't beleive in that. I did notice as soon as I turned 40, some people do treat me differently. In some ways, it is almost like you just disapear from the gay community (online) after you turn 40.

I don't try to act younger than I am but I will say that I still get carded when I buy wine.

i will turn 30 on July 21st, and now that i think about it i dont feel any different than when i was 19 on the verge of turning 20.....a little wiser and more comfortable in my skin....flaws and all

I'm 46 and yes I could be in better shape - but to be honest, I look better than most of my friends and younger as well. I always think in terms of how my father looked at my age - and damn - I look good! LOL!

mickeytopogigio said

CuriousJockAZ saidLife is great at 50 -- never felt better, more full of life, and energetic.

Don't you mean "more full of pep?" The proper term of someone over 49 is "pep." Coupled with a fist pump.

Mickey, you're hot but, nope, fisting has never been my thing...sorry.