Counterfeit_Jock saidHas anyone had this problem? I find that a lot of guys are secretly this dumb, but play it off with good looks.
Don't be deceived!
Yes, but it helped to remind me their are different kinds of dumb, and different kinds of smarts you can find in that abs-of-steel package.
I had an LTR with such a guy. I couldn't believe my own dumbness, as in luck, to have snared this hunk. And I remember the first time I danced with him, bare-chested in a gay club where that was common, I actually got dizzy and weak-kneed as I snuggled my face into a chiseled chest that was like padded stone.
But he couldn't hold an enlightened conversation on most topics, and confessed he wasn't too smart, even said he had a low IQ. Except, he had taught himself carpentry & painting skills to totally renovate 2 houses he owned, personally moving whole walls and ceilings, laying new floors, no simple do-it-yourself tasks. And his artistic taste was remarkably sophisticated, with a clear gay flair to it that avoided being eccentric.
He was also an actor, on hiatus when I met him, plus he had his own cable TV show, and made his own videos. And, I learned still later, a ton of money he'd earned himself, that he managed very cleverly, allowing him to own 3 homes without mortgages in 2 States.
Yeah, maybe he couldn't follow me in some philosophical discussion, his world knowledge and political awareness nonexistent, and his interests were remarkably simple, even childlike. But he had practical smarts in different ways that allowed him to be more successful than me, and very much richer. So which of us was really the less bright?
I admired him for what he accomplished, and would never call him dumb. Maybe the OP's guy is the same way, with hidden & remarkable talents that weren't readily apparent? In some cases only time will reveal them. (Although the racist remarks, if true, would be a deal breaker for me)