Mixed messages

  • Phillippe40

    Posts: 2

    Apr 25, 2012 12:31 AM GMT

    Hey everyone i met this guy 2 months ago he is from the mid west u.s. But has been working in montreal canada for the past year he contacted me from an online dating site we hit it off great from the start he said he wanted more than just a hook up so we proceeded to see each other more and more then he had to go back to the us for 3 weeks i missed him but we would text often when he got back to montreal he texted me and said he was to tired and i sugested we see each other on the weekend he was cool with that then the below is copy of the text

    Me

    Shit i m down town at the tea store u still at work

    Him

    Im on way to pick up xxxxx and xxx 

    Me

     Ok so did you think about going to the country tomorrow

    Him

    I I dont think i want to travel this weekend it will be cold and rainy i hear

    Me

    I agree 
    Are u working tomorrow 

    Him 

    I don t know i feel so blah

    Me 
    Well i ll let you get back to your friends 
    Text me when your free

    Him 
    Ok stud

    Me the next day at noon 
    Hey babe you free for dinner 

    Him

    I tentatively book a birthday party with kxxxxx but im kind of hung over idk what ill do 

    Me
    Oh i see you know if you just don t want to see me anymore just tell me i thought the feeling was mutual but i guess not icon_sad.gif

    Him
    Not at all i like you alot 

    Me 
    I just feel as though you never want to see me 
    I haven t seen you in 3 weeks 

    Him
    Im sorry ive been unavailable, i havent been so busy or traveled my whole life

    Me
    If you want i can go with you to the party or what ever you want just to be with you will make me happy 
    If you want me im yours i just don t like games i really like you i think i have made that clear anyway i don t want to stress you out just want to see you
    So what do i do 

    Him 
    I don t inderstand 

    Me
    Can i go with you or do you not want me there 

    Him
    I prefer its just me and kexxx

    Me
    Anyway  i would like to see you at some point today if that is at all possible 
    at lest to talk
    Anyway have fun tonight  text me when you want to talk icon_sad.gif

    Him
    Sorry im hungover and cant hang now still in bed. Ill text tomorrow

    Me
    Alright 
    I just want to know where i stand sorry if i m stressing you 
    I just feel as though i m just the guy u call when there is no one else around and i thought you wanted more anyway i just keep getting mixed messages :/

    Him
    Well thats not the case ive been back in montreal little more than 4 days and hung with muy friends 2x
    I understand ur feelings
    Im exausted and im doubting a relationship is possibke with my work/travel schedule

    Me
    Can you call me please so we can talk for 2 mins

    Him
     Can we talk when i feel better

    Me 
    All  i need to know is how you feel 

    Him
    I think ur the coolest sexy guy i evermet and sweet

    Me
    If you want me i don t need or want you beside me all the time just to know that u want me as much as i want u
    I ve never felt this strong about anyone in my life all i ve done today is cry that has never gapened to me before this fast
    Look as for you going out with friends thats great just let me know today i had my heart set on seeing you then you tell me you changed your plans thats whay hurts me nothing else and the work travel is ok i work alpt too i understand i dont want to change who you are just mabye compleat you 

    Him
    Phhhhh nothing has changed between us. You are defiantely part of my future please relax dont be sad give me some slack

    Me 
    Would it be possible to meet tomorrow at some point ?

    That was saturday we are now tuesday and no news 
    I need some advise

    What to do
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 25, 2012 12:52 AM GMT
    Phillippe40 said
    Hey everyone

    What to do
    Quit trolling.icon_wink.gif
  • Phillippe40

    Posts: 2

    Apr 25, 2012 1:22 AM GMT
    Not trolling really need some advise on what i should do
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 25, 2012 4:57 AM GMT
    Phillippe40 saidNot trolling really need some advise on what i should do


    ahahahahahahahahahaha

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 25, 2012 5:02 AM GMT
    I made a salad and a mixed drink today. Does that count as mixed messages?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 25, 2012 5:03 AM GMT
    Phillippe40 said
    Hey everyone i met this guy 2 months ago he is from the mid west u.s. But has been working in montreal canada for the past year he contacted me from an online dating site we hit it off great from the start he said he wanted more than just a hook up so we proceeded to see each other more and more then he had to go back to the us for 3 weeks i missed him but we would text often when he got back to montreal he texted me and said he was to tired and i sugested we see each other on the weekend he was cool with that then the below is copy of the text

    Me

    Shit i m down town at the tea store u still at work

    Him

    Im on way to pick up xxxxx and xxx 

    Me

     Ok so did you think about going to the country tomorrow

    Him

    I I dont think i want to travel this weekend it will be cold and rainy i hear

    Me

    I agree 
    Are u working tomorrow 

    Him 

    I don t know i feel so blah

    Me 
    Well i ll let you get back to your friends 
    Text me when your free

    Him 
    Ok stud

    Me the next day at noon 
    Hey babe you free for dinner 

    Him

    I tentatively book a birthday party with kxxxxx but im kind of hung over idk what ill do 

    Me
    Oh i see you know if you just don t want to see me anymore just tell me i thought the feeling was mutual but i guess not icon_sad.gif

    Him
    Not at all i like you alot 

    Me 
    I just feel as though you never want to see me 
    I haven t seen you in 3 weeks 

    Him
    Im sorry ive been unavailable, i havent been so busy or traveled my whole life

    Me
    If you want i can go with you to the party or what ever you want just to be with you will make me happy 
    If you want me im yours i just don t like games i really like you i think i have made that clear anyway i don t want to stress you out just want to see you
    So what do i do 

    Him 
    I don t inderstand 

    Me
    Can i go with you or do you not want me there 

    Him
    I prefer its just me and kexxx

    Me
    Anyway  i would like to see you at some point today if that is at all possible 
    at lest to talk
    Anyway have fun tonight  text me when you want to talk icon_sad.gif

    Him
    Sorry im hungover and cant hang now still in bed. Ill text tomorrow

    Me
    Alright 
    I just want to know where i stand sorry if i m stressing you 
    I just feel as though i m just the guy u call when there is no one else around and i thought you wanted more anyway i just keep getting mixed messages :/

    Him
    Well thats not the case ive been back in montreal little more than 4 days and hung with muy friends 2x
    I understand ur feelings
    Im exausted and im doubting a relationship is possibke with my work/travel schedule

    Me
    Can you call me please so we can talk for 2 mins

    Him
     Can we talk when i feel better

    Me 
    All  i need to know is how you feel 

    Him
    I think ur the coolest sexy guy i evermet and sweet

    Me
    If you want me i don t need or want you beside me all the time just to know that u want me as much as i want u
    I ve never felt this strong about anyone in my life all i ve done today is cry that has never gapened to me before this fast
    Look as for you going out with friends thats great just let me know today i had my heart set on seeing you then you tell me you changed your plans thats whay hurts me nothing else and the work travel is ok i work alpt too i understand i dont want to change who you are just mabye compleat you 

    Him
    Phhhhh nothing has changed between us. You are defiantely part of my future please relax dont be sad give me some slack

    Me 
    Would it be possible to meet tomorrow at some point ?

    That was saturday we are now tuesday and no news 
    I need some advise

    What to do


    This is the worst play I've ever read.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 25, 2012 5:13 AM GMT
    I dunno, if he's busy I guess just leave him be? That's what I do..
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 25, 2012 5:38 AM GMT
    I say leave it alone. You've already expressed how you feel to him and he seems to just be giving you lip/text service. Perhaps he's really busy and he's horrible at time management, but if he was really into you, he would for sure met up/chatted with you by now.
  • thatguyny

    Posts: 28

    Apr 25, 2012 8:25 PM GMT
    I couldn't get through the whole thing
    as I scanned it, my brain must've been translating the lines into
    "I'm needy"
    "I'm needy"
    "I'm needy"
    "I'm needy"
    "I'm needy"
    and then I got a little bored

    but maybe it was just me
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 25, 2012 8:32 PM GMT
    I'd have just left him to get back to you after the first welcome back message. I've learned not to overly pursue. He has time for his friends but not the person who is 'defiantly part of my future'??
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 25, 2012 8:34 PM GMT
    Move on, he's not worth it.
  • Mikesdays2

    Posts: 20

    Apr 25, 2012 9:59 PM GMT
    you come off as really needy. at the end of the day-he's just not that into you.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 25, 2012 10:20 PM GMT
    To be honest, it sounds like he's avoiding you. If he was that interested in you, he'd atleast try and make plans.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 25, 2012 10:35 PM GMT
    Phillippe40 said

    ... i just don t like games

    A good way to avoid games is to refrain from laying on guilt trips and accept what he told you.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 21, 2013 3:09 AM GMT
    Hey man....I can appreciate your position. Kinda been there myself. I'd have to say he's really not into you. As someone else commented, if he was truly interested, he'd make time. Sorry, it seems harsh to be blunt. I am just getting used to gay dating. I've learned a few things, from what you've said, his interest is only passing, he may be using his distance as a way to say he is interested in you but he can blame not making time for becuase of the distance. You've made it very clear to him how you feel. Even if he is into you, you are not a the same place. So, I'd suggest backing off some. Let him be the one to want to show you he wants to spend time with you. I'd say that if you perhaps cut off contanct to a significant amount, not all the way, but much less, and he does not get back with you, especially if its more than a week, then you have your answer. Your time is better spent on finding a quality man who can be straight with you, one way or another. I wish you well man!
  • tuffguyndc

    Posts: 4437

    Sep 21, 2013 3:22 AM GMT
    whew, bro, first calm down. stop stressing. secondly, it seems you have a lot of time on your hand. do you have any friends? my advice to you is stop making yourself so available. it seems he has lots to do and you have nothing to do but sit around and think about him. i am not sure what's going on but if you keep texting him like you are than you are bound to lose him. like he said cut him some slack. he is only been in town for a few days. let him catch his breath. in the mean time let him contact you. find something to keep you distracted. hell go to the country by yourself. try not to text him for a few days. if he contacts you. keep the text messages short and simple. do not mention anything about feelings from now on. try this and if he does not come around then he is not really looking for anything buddy so move on. but try what i said and see what happens