uoft23 saidI don't think its an unreasonable concern. I think if someone had frequented a bathhouse a lot I'd be concerned about their ability to be faithful. Maybe thats not fair, I don't know. But its how I'd feel.
Same here. Liked a guy once before who was open about his past hook-ups. Wondered if I could ever really trust him in a relationship and that worry actually ended the relationship. I wondered if he hooked up so easily in the past...what's to keep him from doing it in the future after we're together.
While I understand what both you guys are saying, I think it is totally unreasonable to think that way. Saying that someone who goes to a bathhouse would not be able to be faithful would be akin to saying....
1) Guys who go to bars are alcoholics - if he drank up so easily in the bar...what's to keep him from becoming a drunk?
2) Guys that use credit cards are financially irresponsible - if he used his credit card instead of his debit card...what's to keep him from going financially broke?
3) Guys that play cards have a gambling problem - if he played card so well in the past...what's to keep him from gambling?
4) Guys that smoke pot are druggies - if he smoked pot so well in the past...what's to keep him from getting into harder drugs to get high?
5) Guys of X race that like only like guys of Y race sexually are racist - if he sexually connectes with one race so well in the past...what's to keep him from being a racist?
I think all those statements are ridiculous and of very narrow-minded thinking. Just as questioning someones fidelity because he goes to a bathhouse or hook ups, for the matter.
Note: we aren't talking about those who do things in extreme e.g. guys that have sex with several others in a night in a bathhouse or elsewhere, guys that get shit-faced drunk regularly, guys that cant afford to pay their credit card bills.. etc Thats a different discussion.