What's the benefits of coming out or stay in? And what is the easiest way to to come out?

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    Apr 29, 2012 6:43 AM GMT
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    Apr 29, 2012 7:07 AM GMT
    Benefits: It shows you have the balls to stand up for yourself.

    Easiest way to come out: Open the door.
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    Apr 29, 2012 7:15 AM GMT
    Staying in: Keeping your job. (Lets be real here, there are assholes everywhere. Good idea to keep personal life away from working life.)

    Coming out: Freedom. Acceptance. True happiness. All the best parts of life. icon_smile.gif

    Easiest way to come out? Depends on your situation. People generally do something like this: come out close friends, more friends, even more friends, then family, then everyone! Coming out is not a one time deal, it's for life.
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    Apr 29, 2012 8:00 AM GMT
    paulflexes saidBenefits: It shows you have the balls to stand up for yourself.

    Easiest way to come out: Open the door.
    that's the easiest way I have ever heard lol
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    Apr 29, 2012 8:02 AM GMT
    MtnRider saidStaying in: Keeping your job. (Lets be real here, there are assholes everywhere. Good idea to keep personal life away from working life.)

    Coming out: Freedom. Acceptance. True happiness. All the best parts of life. icon_smile.gif

    Easiest way to come out? Depends on your situation. People generally do something like this: come out close friends, more friends, even more friends, then family, then everyone! Coming out is not a one time deal, it's for life.
    dont know wat to tell my friends or family...
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    Apr 29, 2012 10:39 AM GMT
    MtnRider saidStaying in: Keeping your job. (Lets be real here, there are assholes everywhere. Good idea to keep personal life away from working life.)
    LOL HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA IF THIS IS A PROBLEM THEN YOUR JOB FUCKING SUCKS

    oh wait sorry i forgot that being in the fashion industry may be looked down upon by str8-actin masc meathead douchebags but it means i can be like HAY GORL DO U LIKE MY SKIRT DAT I AM WEARIN EVEN THO I AM A BOY B/C I AM PUSHIN DA LIMITZ OF GENDER 2 MAKE A STATMENET BTW IM GAY IF U DIDNT NOTICE and nobody gives a fuq
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    Apr 29, 2012 1:39 PM GMT
    MtnRider saidStaying in: Keeping your job. (Lets be real here, there are assholes everywhere. Good idea to keep personal life away from working life.)

    Coming out: Freedom. Acceptance. True happiness. All the best parts of life. icon_smile.gif

    Easiest way to come out? Depends on your situation. People generally do something like this: come out close friends, more friends, even more friends, then family, then everyone! Coming out is not a one time deal, it's for life.
    These days, if you lose your job for being gay, all it takes is one call to the media and that company is history.
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    Apr 29, 2012 2:11 PM GMT
    SimpleGuy said
    MtnRider saidStaying in: Keeping your job. (Lets be real here, there are assholes everywhere. Good idea to keep personal life away from working life.)

    Coming out: Freedom. Acceptance. True happiness. All the best parts of life. icon_smile.gif

    Easiest way to come out? Depends on your situation. People generally do something like this: come out close friends, more friends, even more friends, then family, then everyone! Coming out is not a one time deal, it's for life.
    dont know wat to tell my friends or family...
    The truth.icon_wink.gif
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    Apr 29, 2012 2:34 PM GMT
    Get Caught.... easiest way.....lol. Really though what happened to your rights as a person. What you do... as long as it's legal... is your own business. If you want to date a guy or girl and carry on that relationship.... it doesn't have to be broadcasted. Maybe it's just me.... but people should like you for who you are. By coming out it may get you more action in the gay community... but i think that's about it and maybe it will just annoy others.
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    Apr 29, 2012 3:02 PM GMT
    Anduru said
    MtnRider saidStaying in: Keeping your job. (Lets be real here, there are assholes everywhere. Good idea to keep personal life away from working life.)
    LOL HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA IF THIS IS A PROBLEM THEN YOUR JOB FUCKING SUCKS

    oh wait sorry i forgot that being in the fashion industry may be looked down upon by str8-actin masc meathead douchebags but it means i can be like HAY GORL DO U LIKE MY SKIRT DAT I AM WEARIN EVEN THO I AM A BOY B/C I AM PUSHIN DA LIMITZ OF GENDER 2 MAKE A STATMENET BTW IM GAY IF U DIDNT NOTICE and nobody gives a fuq
    good looking guy with a great sence of humor icon_razz.gif
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    Apr 29, 2012 3:04 PM GMT
    robbee333 saidGet Caught.... easiest way.....lol. Really though what happened to your rights as a person. What you do... as long as it's legal... is your own business. If you want to date a guy or girl and carry on that relationship.... it doesn't have to be broadcasted. Maybe it's just me.... but people should like you for who you are. By coming out it may get you more action in the gay community... but i think that's about it and maybe it will just annoy others.
    like watching gay porn while ur parents were home?
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    Apr 29, 2012 3:18 PM GMT
    Benefits of coming out?--too many to list

    Benefits of steying in?--NONE
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    Apr 29, 2012 3:21 PM GMT
    Benefits of staying IN:

    Self-loathing
    Loneliness
    Depression
    Desperation
    Addiction
    Overwhelming fear
    Isolation
    Despair
    Regret

    did I miss anything?

  • Lincsbear

    Posts: 2605

    Apr 29, 2012 3:57 PM GMT
    I can`t see any benefits from staying in the closet. It`s the triumph of fear-a crippling condition. Coming out can be hard in the short term, but nowhere as bad as staying closeted in the long way.
    The way I did it is gradually, beginning with those I most trusted.

    Coming out?

    Self-respect.
    Honesty.
    Liberation.
    Good company.
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    Apr 29, 2012 4:25 PM GMT
    dustin_K_tx saidBenefits of staying IN:

    Self-loathing
    Loneliness
    Depression
    Desperation
    Addiction
    Overwhelming fear
    Isolation
    Despair
    Regret

    did I miss anything?



    Boredom
    Anxiety
    Self-harm (caused by one or more of the above)
    Confusion
    Emotional issues
    Etc., etc., etc.
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    Apr 29, 2012 4:32 PM GMT
    The only people I recommend staying in the closet are people in highschool or people that can't support themselves financially that know that coming out will make serious conflict. Other than that there's no reason. You'll feel better after its over and wonder why you made such a big deal over it.
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    Apr 29, 2012 4:35 PM GMT
    Are there any benefits to staying in?
  • buckeyemike

    Posts: 19

    Apr 29, 2012 4:48 PM GMT
    Coming "out" or staying closeted SHOULD be and in my opinion should be a PERSONAL CHOICE which is and should be RESPECTED by everyone!!!!!!!!!!!!! What I still don't understand about gay males is the fact that men who choose to stay "closeted" are frequently met with distain when one admits they are "bi". I've found that sooooo frequently gay males "ASSUME", and actually say behind your back, that one is actually gay when in actuality you are NOT "GAY"!!!!!!icon_twisted.gificon_evil.gificon_mad.gificon_rolleyes.gif So frequently gay males want society to respect them,and even demand, that society respect their right to "be themselves" and to be "out" with their right to be open about letting others know they are gay, some even don't care who knows about their sexual preference. FINE!icon_mad.gificon_rolleyes.gif WHO CARES!!!!!!icon_twisted.gificon_mad.gificon_rolleyes.gificon_question.gif SO BE IT!!!!!!!!icon_evil.gificon_rolleyes.gificon_lol.gificon_smile.gificon_biggrin.gif
    On the flip side however, they seem INCAPABLE of understanding or just flat out refuse to even TRY to understand that it's actually possible for a man to actually (or women too, although it's seems it's more desirable for women to be "bi" than it is for men!) can indeed actually like BOTH men AND women when it comes to being in love or having sex!!!!!!!!!! It's NOT about a man wanting to remain in the closet or afraid to admit he's gay!!!!!! "WHY" is it soooooo frigging difficult for gay males to understand this!!!!! It's NOT cut in "black and white" as most gay males want to or REFUSE to believe and have this mind set one "is gay" or "NOT gay"!!!!!!!icon_twisted.gificon_evil.gificon_rolleyes.gificon_question.gif If I respect your choice to be open and "out" with your sexual preference (and lets face it, the bottom line is this.........WHOSE BUSINESS IS IT ANY WAY "WHO" OR "WHAT" YOU LIKE TO DO IN YOUR PRIVATE LIFE?????) then why aren't these same men able to respect MY RIGHT to be able to love and find sexually attractive and desirable BOTH men and women and NOT have to choose one over the other??????icon_question.gif
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    Apr 29, 2012 10:58 PM GMT
    mplsmike saidBenefits of coming out?--too many to list

    Benefits of steying in?--NONE
    but i dont know what to tell my parents about this... how do i starticon_question.gif
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    Apr 29, 2012 11:01 PM GMT
    Benefits of staying In:

    If you are at an age where you still rely on the support of your parents (college tuition, roof over the head, etc) then you need to closely evaluate how your parents might behave in that situation.

    Placing extra hardship on your life at that young age probably isn't worth it.
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    Apr 29, 2012 11:03 PM GMT
    buckeyemike saidComing "out" or staying closeted SHOULD be and in my opinion should be a PERSONAL CHOICE which is and should be RESPECTED by everyone!!!!!!!!!!!!! What I still don't understand about gay males is the fact that men who choose to stay "closeted" are frequently met with distain when one admits they are "bi". I've found that sooooo frequently gay males "ASSUME", and actually say behind your back, that one is actually gay when in actuality you are NOT "GAY"!!!!!!icon_twisted.gificon_evil.gificon_mad.gificon_rolleyes.gif So frequently gay males want society to respect them,and even demand, that society respect their right to "be themselves" and to be "out" with their right to be open about letting others know they are gay, some even don't care who knows about their sexual preference. FINE!icon_mad.gificon_rolleyes.gif WHO CARES!!!!!!icon_twisted.gificon_mad.gificon_rolleyes.gificon_question.gif SO BE IT!!!!!!!!icon_evil.gificon_rolleyes.gificon_lol.gificon_smile.gificon_biggrin.gif
    On the flip side however, they seem INCAPABLE of understanding or just flat out refuse to even TRY to understand that it's actually possible for a man to actually (or women too, although it's seems it's more desirable for women to be "bi" than it is for men!) can indeed actually like BOTH men AND women when it comes to being in love or having sex!!!!!!!!!! It's NOT about a man wanting to remain in the closet or afraid to admit he's gay!!!!!! "WHY" is it soooooo frigging difficult for gay males to understand this!!!!! It's NOT cut in "black and white" as most gay males want to or REFUSE to believe and have this mind set one "is gay" or "NOT gay"!!!!!!!icon_twisted.gificon_evil.gificon_rolleyes.gificon_question.gif If I respect your choice to be open and "out" with your sexual preference (and lets face it, the bottom line is this.........WHOSE BUSINESS IS IT ANY WAY "WHO" OR "WHAT" YOU LIKE TO DO IN YOUR PRIVATE LIFE?????) then why aren't these same men able to respect MY RIGHT to be able to love and find sexually attractive and desirable BOTH men and women and NOT have to choose one over the other??????icon_question.gif


    ^^^^^ tee-hee ^^^^

    yer a pussy and ya wanna brag about it.

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    Apr 29, 2012 11:08 PM GMT
    MtnRider saidStaying in: Keeping your job. (Lets be real here, there are assholes everywhere. Good idea to keep personal life away from working life.)

    Coming out: Freedom. Acceptance. True happiness. All the best parts of life. icon_smile.gif

    Easiest way to come out? Depends on your situation. People generally do something like this: come out close friends, more friends, even more friends, then family, then everyone! Coming out is not a one time deal, it's for life.


    Makes a lot of sense. I guess I'm at stage two then
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    Apr 29, 2012 11:32 PM GMT
    I already knew that my parents where in tune with my sexuality at a very young age. I played with Barbies throughout my childhood. However, before a class trip my senior year, I left them a note in the mailbox. Several days later when I returned, they were just like "whatever we love you just the same and already knew." I am sooo lucky! I LOVE YOU MOM AND DAD!
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    Apr 29, 2012 11:52 PM GMT
    I'm coming out when I finish school and get a job and my own place. Once I'm secure that way, I'll be coming out. Honestly there is no reason to stay in other than the risk of losing support and that's if you're at a young age and dependent on parents.
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    Apr 30, 2012 1:53 AM GMT
    SimpleGuy saidicon_eek.gif


    I find almost no need to discuss being gay to a straight man. Why make life so difficult? My friends know I am not sexually attracted to females and that is all they need to know. My Mom knows also. Think Greek I guess. They probably found it odd to stop and speculate the topic, they just were who they were. I am who I am. Just treat people with respect and most of all be honest with yourself on what purpose "coming out" is going to do for you. I think going to a gay festival is already coming out; I don't think there needs to be a list of people to invite into my sexual preferences. I've not done them wrong nor myself wrong by keeping it to myself. I'm happy that way!