Where is the best place to meet guys for more than just sex?

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  May 06, 2012 5:17 PM GMT

  Hey guys,
  
  Where is the best place to meet outgoing yet masculine guys? I'm attracted to white guys mostly (doesn't have to be the A & F types just a cute, sane, in shape & not a liar, miserable, insecure or a drug addict). I love guys with blond hair & blue eyes or even dark hair w/blue eyes & sometimes I like latinos but anyway I don't wanna just hookup. I had another post that you might have seen asking to critique me, I don't need to be critiqued anymore, thanks and don't be cruel, be respectful please.
  
  I like the outgoing, crazy, funny, uninhibited boys that like to have fun & don't care about what people say or think. That's the type of guy I'm looking for! I'm seeking a more type of relationship that lingers along the lines of friendship to dating for obviously more than dating at some point.
  
  So places: Not the porn shops, not the "resorts/bathhouses", so where, the bars?

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• SoleFireSiren
  
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  May 06, 2012 5:34 PM GMT

  GayBtm83 said
  I like the outgoing, crazy, funny, uninhibited boys that like to have fun & don't care about what people say or think.

  
  
  
  My ex was just like that, wound up being total Mr.Wrong, let me just say this now, sometimes what you always wanted isn't what you really always needed ;p~*

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  May 06, 2012 5:47 PM GMT

  I'd try to examine why you like the things you like and really ask yourself if that, specifically, is what you want.
  
  For example... I used to think that Latin was my type. Which was great for me because Latin guys typically have a fetish for huge, muscular, bro-ish white guys like me. Awesome! (Though they like them blonde, which I definitely am not, but you know I'm pale so it's close enough) I thought, "great, this'll be easy. Just find some Latins." As you can see from my relationship status, though, it doesn't really work that way.
  
  The truth is, I wasn't looking for a Latin guy: I was looking for certain personality traits... a way certain Latin guys made me feel about myself. Knowing that, I don't have to go around imagining I need to find a Latin boyfriend to be happy, or that this is my "type". I can feel out any range of guys looking for the things I really know I want.
  
  ***
  
  Also: don't go out "looking" for guys. Go out and do the things that you like to do... That's the best way to find a guy who likes the things you like: doing the things you do.

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  May 06, 2012 5:52 PM GMT

  Larkin,
  
  You're a sweetie and thanks for the insight its very helpful. I agree doing the things I like will help me find a guy that has similar interests. ;D You are a cutie though, and yes I also love the bro-ish white boys, opposites attract yet I see a underlining issue, is it that you think I should be looking for a personality, rather than a physical appearance? I just am asking and want to point out that I definitely think that the physical (like most people is the initial attraction). I mean I have to like what you look like if we're going to be dating. Maybe I misread it...idk but yeah I think you liking latins is a cool thing & I'd date you ;)

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  May 06, 2012 6:00 PM GMT

  GayBtm83 saidLarkin,
  
  You're a sweetie and thanks for the insight its very helpful. I agree doing the things I like will help me find a guy that has similar interests. ;D You are a cutie though, and yes I also love the bro-ish white boys, opposites attract yet I see a underlining issue, is it that you think I should be looking for a personality, rather than a physical appearance? I just am asking and want to point out that I definitely think that the physical (like most people is the initial attraction). I mean I have to like what you look like if we're going to be dating. Maybe I misread it...idk but yeah I think you liking latins is a cool thing & I'd date you ;)

  
  
  I'm not saying you have to go date a whale or a burn victim or something, just that maybe think about what the specific traits your looking for actually mean to you. Physical attraction is an important step... a very important one. I need to date a guy within 40-50 lbs of me, and I know why that is (I did the exercise above and know why it makes me feel good to be with a guy that size haha). But knowing that he has to be within 40-50 lbs of me and why I like that means that I know I don't need him to have a 6 pack, I don't need him to be a massively jacked bodybuilder, I just like the impression of weight and strength. It frees me up from looking for a "type".

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  May 06, 2012 6:40 PM GMT

  larkin,
  
  i agree! totally agree! i have to be attracted to the person, he has to be nice and treat me right, we have to have to fun together and hopefully have some similar interests, that's pretty much it. i mean the bonding is crucial, communication is key. yup! ;D

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  May 06, 2012 6:43 PM GMT

  larkin you are so cute man, i wish you didn't live all the way across the country lol ;)

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• Trepeat
  
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  May 07, 2012 5:00 AM GMT

  Hahaha I was just on a date with a burn victim last week. He was sexy, dirty, and actually seemed like a nice enough guy,

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• MikemikeMike
  
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  May 07, 2012 5:03 AM GMT

  In common interest groups. Helps if you play team sports.

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  May 07, 2012 5:08 AM GMT

  sunday school?

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  May 07, 2012 6:37 AM GMT

  I think it is also important to note that that when someone is trying to offer you the best advice possible on your relationship, sex, and insecurity issue, it is not because he wants you to tell him how attractive you find him. You can't just snatch at every man that pays a kindness to you. You might as well be a venus fly-trap. It seems as if you were not comprehending his advice and simply agreed with him based on sexual attraction. Whether or not that is the case, I think you should work on you approach. Also, a guy who doesn't care what anyone thinks is a guy who also does not often respect others. You will find yourself single more often than not if you go after guys who act that way. The best guys DO care what others think and DO care how their actions affect those close to them. And that is my two cents for today.

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  May 07, 2012 6:46 AM GMT

  GayBtm83 saidWhere is the best place to meet guys for more than just sex?

  What's the point in that?

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• Pontifex
  
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  May 07, 2012 7:59 AM GMT

  You should just try to live your life and get as most out of it as you can. Instead of doing nothing go out and experience something. Most big cities seem to have gay running groups. There are always things like photography classes(i can almost guarantee you there are gay guys there). Just live life and you will probably meet someone. There is always RJ too. lol. Not everyone on here is looking for a quickie... or a longie.

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  May 07, 2012 8:16 AM GMT

  *just sitting here, lecturing what people suggest *
  
  
  
  

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  May 07, 2012 1:38 PM GMT

  AeroNalex saidI think it is also important to note that that when someone is trying to offer you the best advice possible on your relationship, sex, and insecurity issue, it is not because he wants you to tell him how attractive you find him. You can't just snatch at every man that pays a kindness to you. You might as well be a venus fly-trap. It seems as if you were not comprehending his advice and simply agreed with him based on sexual attraction. Whether or not that is the case, I think you should work on you approach. Also, a guy who doesn't care what anyone thinks is a guy who also does not often respect others. You will find yourself single more often than not if you go after guys who act that way. The best guys DO care what others think and DO care how their actions affect those close to them. And that is my two cents for today.

  
  
  Well thanks for your two cents man, but no. First of all I don't have an insecurity issue (perhaps a little but who doesn't). I'm pretty happy with myself but didn't understand why people were coming up to me or vice versa. I did comprehend and consider it and I made that clear in my last post but I'm not here to talk about that here...I said I got the feedback I needed & that's it.
  
  Yes, I need to work on my approach, I said that I considered that. I do respect others but I will not respect someone that is deliberately being rude. To those kinds of people I can just say go **** yourself. I have short fuse for hatred. If he would have said something like that to me in person I'd probably go off on him, then if he put his hands on me, I'd kick his ass lol.

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  May 07, 2012 1:39 PM GMT

  Pontifex saidYou should just try to live your life and get as most out of it as you can. Instead of doing nothing go out and experience something. Most big cities seem to have gay running groups. There are always things like photography classes(i can almost guarantee you there are gay guys there). Just live life and you will probably meet someone. There is always RJ too. lol. Not everyone on here is looking for a quickie... or a longie.

  
  
  Agreed! ;)

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  May 07, 2012 1:42 PM GMT

  Pontifex saidYou should just try to live your life and get as most out of it as you can. Instead of doing nothing go out and experience something. Most big cities seem to have gay running groups. There are always things like photography classes(i can almost guarantee you there are gay guys there). Just live life and you will probably meet someone. There is always RJ too. lol. Not everyone on here is looking for a quickie... or a longie.

  
  
  Yeah I am gonna try to find an LGBT event near by...the younger crowd out here do house parties but the ones my age usually just go out to West Hollywood, LA, or clubs that are like 1hr 30 mins away & who wants to drive back & forth 3 hrs to see someone? I'd rather just move lol. Maybe that's why...THIS PLACE SUCKS! LOL I MISS THE CITY!

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  May 07, 2012 2:00 PM GMT

  You made this thread when your username of choice advertises your sexual position? I suspect something is amiss here... troll, or desperate fat?

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  May 07, 2012 2:28 PM GMT

  Firebrand saidYou made this thread when your username of choice advertises your sexual position? I suspect something is amiss here... troll, or desperate fat?

  LMAO duh

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  May 07, 2012 2:48 PM GMT

  Larkin saidAlso: don't go out "looking" for guys. Go out and do the things that you like to do... That's the best way to find a guy who likes the things you like: doing the things you do.

  Larkin hit on what I think is the most important part of all this! Seek out groups of others that like to do what you like to do, cycling, book club, workout, running, comics, whatever and don't worry about finding the right guy for a relationship. If you need some 'relief' while you're enjoying the activities and haven't found anyone, then find an interim FB.

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  May 07, 2012 2:49 PM GMT

  paulflexes said

  GayBtm83 saidWhere is the best place to meet guys for more than just sex?

  What's the point in that?

  
  Im equally confused.

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  May 07, 2012 2:50 PM GMT

  Firebrand saidYou made this thread when your username of choice advertises your sexual position? I suspect something is amiss here... troll, or desperate fat?

  
  
  the latter

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  May 07, 2012 2:54 PM GMT

  I agree with Larkin. Don't go out looking for guys. Do what you love to do, and along the way, you are bound to meet people you like, maybe one will be a guy.
  
  Also, take note of how you present yourself. I see profiles on here all the time of guys "not looking to hook-up" but they only have shirtless pics, and adult photos. Either one of those things is fine, but they really don't mix. Sexy means you are looking (or will find) sex.

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  May 08, 2012 3:42 AM GMT

  Firebrand saidYou made this thread when your username of choice advertises your sexual position? I suspect something is amiss here... troll, or desperate fat?

  
  
  Rude...I'm not desperate, fat or a troll why would you say such a thing? My s/n has nothing to do with this thread. I created that s/n because I want guys to know that I'm a bottom, so what? I made this post to get some feedback on where to meet guys for more than just sex. You being a total jerk!

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  May 08, 2012 3:43 AM GMT

  eb925guy said

  Larkin saidAlso: don't go out "looking" for guys. Go out and do the things that you like to do... That's the best way to find a guy who likes the things you like: doing the things you do.

  Larkin hit on what I think is the most important part of all this! Seek out groups of others that like to do what you like to do, cycling, book club, workout, running, comics, whatever and don't worry about finding the right guy for a relationship. If you need some 'relief' while you're enjoying the activities and haven't found anyone, then find an interim FB.

  
  
  Thanks ;)

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