• Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    May 11, 2012 9:55 PM GMT
    I was wondering how many people on here can say they've never fallen in love. I mean I've crushed on guys, I've lusted after guys, etc. But I've never actually fallen in love with one. At least, not to my knowledge. At 22 years old, I feel weird for never having been in a relationship (With a guy. Mind you, I came out last year.) But I really don't feel bad about it.

    I mean sometimes its nice to have someone to be intimate with and I suppose the idea of sharing your life with someone is ideal because its been ingrained in us by society (And humans are social creatures I guess.) But part of me wonders if "love" is real. I mean I feel an attachment to my family and friends, and I bond with them, and obviously its different to "love" than to be in love. But I think with Hollywood and all that shit we all have this false and pre-conceived notion of "love" which is unattainable, that leads most people to be miserable because their relationship will never be a Twilight movie.

    So I ask you this: What do you think about love. Have you ever been in love? If so, describe your experiences. Are we missing out or is single life better? Part of me is doubtful two guys could ever make it work considering the world we live in today.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    May 12, 2012 2:09 AM GMT
    Yea finding this so called "love" at such a young age is difficult, but there are stories of success. My mom knows a gay couple who have dated through high school and are graduating together at University and they are as happy as can be.

    The thing is people our age are so filled with emotions and have such high sex drives that it is hard for them to focus on a certain someone to be with. The attention span of people are age is sooo small.

    However, apparently I am different. I like to talk and get to know people and actually try to know someone on a personal level. Sure intimate moments are fun, but sooner or later you will get tired of it. There is only so much pleasure and excitement a one night stand can bring that by the next day you don't feel any real satisfaction. Soon these encounters will get boring and you will long for someone to share you life with it. Whether it be in a few months or a few years, that feeling of "love" will come. Sure you might notice it and you might not, but never give up hope. Don't try to find it, it will come to you. I remember when I tried to find a guy and it didn't really work out.

    But one day, it found me. It was completely random, but I developed a crush (I haven't had a crush in my life) and this person just really attracted me (both personally and physically). He was good looking, but my god his personality was amazing! I wish I had his personality. Chatting with him always brought a smile on my face.

    Overall, don't give up, but don't try so hard. The harder you look, the farther away you will be from finding love. Just try to find someone you can get along with as a friend and see if it can develop even more. This is a difficult time in our lives, but sooner or later we will pull through. icon_wink.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    May 12, 2012 2:12 AM GMT
    In love NOW and it sux ass because it isn't mutaul
  • metta

    Posts: 44486

    May 12, 2012 2:16 AM GMT
    NOTE -
    - infatuation is not love
    - possessiveness is not love
    - love involves wanting the best for that person even if it is not you.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    May 12, 2012 2:25 AM GMT
    "Love is the condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own."~~Robert Heinlein, Stranger in a Strange Land
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    May 12, 2012 2:32 AM GMT
    Are drugs real? Love is mostly chemical and romanticized by writers on drugs / alcohol . Enjoy it for what it is not what it is supposed to be.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    May 12, 2012 2:36 AM GMT
    Most younger gays find a guy they think is really hot and think they are in love after like a month of dating.

    Love is something which is unconditional. You accept, the person for the good, the bad, and you over look the flaws which everyone else views an imperfections. From my experience people really don't get to know someone on that level. It seems like everyone has this view of what they deserve and most are always seeking something better and not content with anything.

    To me it seems that most homosexual males try way too hard in their 20's to identify and be someone they are not which makes falling in love almost impossible. I know, I use to be that way but I just turned 30 and have mellowed out and really don't care what anyone thinks anymore. (Getting old and wise, who would have thought).

    Personally, I use to beat myself up thinking I was not capable of falling in love because you had to have extraordinary qualities to have someone feel about you in such a way.

    To fall in love you have to be vulnerable and put it all out there. Showing someone the good, bad, etc. I'm 30 and never been in love but haven't given up on it yet. Looking back I wasn't capable of it.

    Don't go out of your way in your 20's trying to find that person because more than likely it won't happen. Have fun along the way, date and enjoy being single.