#Biboyproblems

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    May 17, 2012 4:33 PM GMT
    Okay well I'm basically moving to Berlin in 3 weeks due to this program I'm taking to live there for 6 months to a year. Its pretty much going to be like "The Real World" in the sense that I'm going to be living with a bunch of Americans my age in Berlin. Now, the problem is that Berlin is going to have gay pride on the weekend of the 23/24. On that weekend our group is going to travel to Hamburg as well. So I guess I really don't know what to do. On the one hand, I heard gay pride in Berlin is freaking epic and amazing. And how many times am I going to see something like that? On the other hand missing a trip with the people I'm going to be hanging out with is like missing a bonding experience with them. I'm afraid if I pass on it I'm going to miss out on inside jokes and they're going to see me as anti-social or weird for not going on the trip. Especially since its already been paid for. So I kind of don't know which to choose.

    I'm also debating whether to be out to all of them. I recently came out last year to my friends here, and I'm not interested in going to live with new people and be closeted. So how do I let them know that I play for both teams? I just don't want anyone to get offended, and I don't want to go back into the closet either. I just don't want an awkward living situation.

    Thoughts?
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    May 17, 2012 9:42 PM GMT
    bump
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    May 17, 2012 11:18 PM GMT
    Yeah but at the same time I don't know. But I still don't know whether to tell them about me and how.
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    May 18, 2012 3:17 PM GMT
    Berlin is so gay anyway - you can be gay gay gay 24/7 even without pride. It's really about deciding what YOU want to do and just accepting that as a consequence you'll miss the other activity.

    As for coming out, just don't treat it like a big deal at all, treat it very matter-of-factly. Do what you want to do, talk about girls, talk about boys, let them deal with it. Don't make a huge deal about it and in return don't worry about whether they will be offended.
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    May 18, 2012 3:19 PM GMT
    dude, fuck the pride parade..
    they're kinda all the same. Getting drunk, guys parading around on floats in their underwear, etc.... its def not EPIC...

    go to Hamburg, brah. Such a cooler experience. plus you'll be bonding with friends, etc.

    gay pride for what? make out with some sluts and get drunk? *yawn

    i been did that lol. totes not worth it
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    May 18, 2012 3:20 PM GMT
    ^^^ hehe, I would visit Berlin with showme. icon_redface.gificon_biggrin.gificon_razz.gif
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    May 18, 2012 3:23 PM GMT
    JoyfullyRandom said^^^ hehe, I would visit Berlin with showme. icon_redface.gificon_biggrin.gificon_razz.gif


    Grrrrrrr. icon_twisted.gificon_twisted.gificon_twisted.gificon_twisted.gificon_smile.gif
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    May 18, 2012 3:39 PM GMT
    GO WITH YOUR FRIENDS!

    I just did exactly what you are about to do, except I was in France. I had decided before I went to put my friends before anything 'gay'. It was definitely a good decision. I noticed that some other people who didn't travel with the larger group became somewhat isolated because they weren't in on the inside jokes, the stories and the opportunities to strengthen friendships.
    My advice is to invest in the things that last, like people and new experiences (friends and Hamburg).
    Here's some more traveling advice. SPEND MONEY. Spend it wisely, but if possible, never sit out on something because of money. You are in Europe to see and experience it, not taking advantage of that opportunity would be unfortunate.
    If you have any other questions about Europe, feel free to send me a message!
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    May 18, 2012 5:35 PM GMT

    How many friends are going to Hamburg? If it's a large group I'm not sure how much bonding will happen.

    The distance between Hamburg and Berlin is about 1.5 hours travel. What about one day in Berlin and one in Hamburg?

    I know; questions, questions, lol.

    -Doug

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    May 18, 2012 9:42 PM GMT
    Import saiddude, fuck the pride parade..
    they're kinda all the same. Getting drunk, guys parading around on floats in their underwear, etc.... its def not EPIC...

    go to Hamburg, brah. Such a cooler experience. plus you'll be bonding with friends, etc.

    gay pride for what? make out with some sluts and get drunk? *yawn

    i been did that lol. totes not worth it


    Hm. Lol I mean I've never been to one in general, but I get what you're saying. I mean the idea of it isn't really appealing to me you know? But I've heard so many people hype up pride in Berlin that I was honestly debating whether or not I should go. But I guess I'll pass on it. :p
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    May 18, 2012 9:44 PM GMT
    showme saidBerlin is so gay anyway - you can be gay gay gay 24/7 even without pride. It's really about deciding what YOU want to do and just accepting that as a consequence you'll miss the other activity.

    As for coming out, just don't treat it like a big deal at all, treat it very matter-of-factly. Do what you want to do, talk about girls, talk about boys, let them deal with it. Don't make a huge deal about it and in return don't worry about whether they will be offended.


    Yeah, I mean ultimately I sort of want to use this as a sort of opportunity to test the waters and see how a group of friends reacts to it right off the bat instead of getting to know me and then me tell them when we're closer you know? I guess we'll see how it goes.
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    May 18, 2012 9:46 PM GMT
    meninlove said
    How many friends are going to Hamburg? If it's a large group I'm not sure how much bonding will happen.

    The distance between Hamburg and Berlin is about 1.5 hours travel. What about one day in Berlin and one in Hamburg?

    I know; questions, questions, lol.

    -Doug



    Lol I actually do not know. Everything's being arranged so all I know is I paid for it. But it should be around 10-12 people lol. I really don't know how its going to work out but I know we're staying overnight in Hamburg.

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    May 18, 2012 9:48 PM GMT
    venture saidGO WITH YOUR FRIENDS!

    I just did exactly what you are about to do, except I was in France. I had decided before I went to put my friends before anything 'gay'. It was definitely a good decision. I noticed that some other people who didn't travel with the larger group became somewhat isolated because they weren't in on the inside jokes, the stories and the opportunities to strengthen friendships.
    My advice is to invest in the things that last, like people and new experiences (friends and Hamburg).
    Here's some more traveling advice. SPEND MONEY. Spend it wisely, but if possible, never sit out on something because of money. You are in Europe to see and experience it, not taking advantage of that opportunity would be unfortunate.
    If you have any other questions about Europe, feel free to send me a message!


    Yeah thats exactly what I was afraid of. icon_confused.gif Especially since the trip is right in the beginning I feel like I might feel left out afterwards. I think I'm sticking with Hamburg lol.
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    May 19, 2012 7:10 AM GMT
    Yep, go with friends, and watch gay pride on Youtube ... with or without them.... Talk with your friends about the Kinsey scale 0-6, 0 being 100 percent hetero and 6 being 100 percent gay... even watch the movie Kinsey with them... there is no fun being in the closet no matter where you are on the Kinsey scale. Even guys with Kinsey scale 0 might try gay sex once. icon_wink.gif