May 17, 2012 10:09 PM GMT
Hello folks. I would have never thought id join a gay forum. Its not that I'm not comfortable with my sexuality. But I'm not out with it as I don't like the idea of flaunting it. I'm still exploring things. Anyway, I have this friend I met through work a year ago. This guy is super attractive but I knew it would be impoasible to ever get with him but I decided to atleast be friends. Within that year we became really close and I gained much resect for him. He has had girlfriends so I know he's straight. Well a few weeks ago he was kicked out of his home and needed a place to stay so I told him he could stay with me a few days. Well that first night he laid in my bed. I thought to myself well if he doesn't mind sleeping with me that's cool. I wouldn't have expected anything to come from it. Well it started where he put his leg on me. Then I scooted closer to him and he literally began to dry hump me. I thought it was a jokr but he kept going. We then removed each others underwear and continued. I never sucked a cock but after I jacked him off I did it for the first time.. We cuddled the rest of the night and he got up panicking saying "I'm not gay I'm straight". It was kinda weird the next mornin but the next night I gave him a back and foot massage. Snce then I had given him atleast 4 foot massages. I began to notice during the weeks after that he was different. We were still close but he was kinda distant. After a couple weeks yesterday I finally told him we had to talk. Last night I told him I felt things were different between us. Keep in mind we had never talked about the things we did. I was like every since a few weeks ago you have been different towards me. He said "what do you mean? After all that gay shit?" I was shocked he brought it up cause I wanted to talk about it. He said can't we just forget about it. I said well its kind of hard too. He said he wasn't gay amd was just really high. I said well you initiated most of it he said in the beginning when he dry humped me he was joking but I respondede back and that's why things led to another. I said did you enjoy any of it?(He was really hard the whole time) he said the back and foot massages but nothing else) everything else was weird and he can't be gay. He then said he is not attracted to me what so Ever. I got quiet. I thought we had something and we do have a deep emotional type friendship. I thought that we could just continue a touchy feely friendship but not be involved romanticaly. He said nothing would change between us. He said he thought I was just being curious or I might be bisexual. I asked "well don't you think you might be since you initiated much of it. He said "no I can't be living a gay lifestyle I'm not gay". Something told me he isn't telling the full truth. He then said he didn't want to talk about it anymore and wanted to forget it like it didn't happen. I'm now torn. I love this kid. I never felt this way for someone. Ever. Never cried about a guy until this morning. Can I please get you alls advice. Is he bi, straight, in denial? Does he have feelings for me? Is it possible for him to get hard ons by me if he isn't attracted to me? He has said things like I love you and I like your personality before. I'm so lost now. And not sure if I should just stop talking to him. I'm glad we finally talked about it but I need someone to tell me what's going on here. Btw he got a new girlfriend.