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The Five Word Story (A Murder Mystery)
jaydub Posts: 549
Jul 24, 2008 7:53 PM GMT
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Real simple - add to the story - limited to 5 words.

I'll start:

It was a warm summer...
Sedative Posts: 5129
Jul 24, 2008 8:00 PM GMT
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It was a warm summer in Acapulco when Jay saw...
jaydub Posts: 549
Jul 24, 2008 8:08 PM GMT
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a man who he thought...
Hidden/Deleted Member
Jul 24, 2008 8:22 PM GMT
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poked him in the eye
Hidden/Deleted Member
Jul 24, 2008 8:41 PM GMT
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Using a razor sharp chopstick.
Hidden/Deleted Member
Jul 24, 2008 8:48 PM GMT
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Jay hid under the mushroom
jaydub Posts: 549
Jul 24, 2008 8:56 PM GMT
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tree, because he was only...
Hidden/Deleted Member
Jul 24, 2008 9:10 PM GMT
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thinking he was just dreaming!
Crimthann Posts: 738
Jul 24, 2008 9:29 PM GMT
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But it was much worse
mindgarden Posts: 1326
Jul 24, 2008 9:38 PM GMT
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- it was hallucinations caused by
Mighty_Q Posts: 158
Jul 24, 2008 9:41 PM GMT
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sleep deprivation...and those mushrooms!
Tyinstl Posts: 88
Jul 24, 2008 9:59 PM GMT
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Meanwhile, in a Tibetan synagogue,

(haha I screwed you all)
Hidden/Deleted Member
Jul 24, 2008 10:01 PM GMT
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the Buddhist monk who had
kinetic Posts: 632
Jul 24, 2008 10:04 PM GMT
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turrets syndrome, suddenly burst out, "
StripperRocco Posts: 1915
Jul 24, 2008 10:08 PM GMT
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"The end is TRULY near!"
Sedative Posts: 5129
Jul 24, 2008 10:18 PM GMT
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It was a warm summer in Acapulco when Jay saw a man who he thought poked him in the eye using a razor sharp chopstick. Jay hid under the mushroom tree, because he was only thinking he was just dreaming! But it was much worse - it was hallucinations caused by sleep deprivation...and those mushrooms!

Meanwhile, in a Tibetan synagogue, the Buddhist monk who had tourette's syndrome, suddenly burst out, "The end is TRULY near!".

But Jay wasn't aware of...
Hidden/Deleted Member
Jul 24, 2008 10:26 PM GMT
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the fact that it was
Tyinstl Posts: 88
Jul 24, 2008 10:27 PM GMT
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a giant boxing glove flying directly
jaydub Posts: 549
Jul 24, 2008 10:30 PM GMT
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towards the village. He quickly...
Mighty_Q Posts: 158
Jul 24, 2008 10:32 PM GMT
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changed into his flaming red...
CuriousJockAZ Posts: 2036
Jul 24, 2008 10:35 PM GMT
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hot pants and matching pumps...
kinetic Posts: 632
Jul 24, 2008 10:37 PM GMT
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and ran away, arms flailing
CuriousJockAZ Posts: 2036
Jul 24, 2008 10:38 PM GMT
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which drew the attention of...
ursamajor Posts: 1261
Jul 24, 2008 10:39 PM GMT
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French Poodle wearing a dress
CuriousJockAZ Posts: 2036
Jul 24, 2008 10:39 PM GMT
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and its butch owner, Rocko
kinetic Posts: 632
Jul 24, 2008 10:43 PM GMT
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whos is secretly nelly
CuriousJockAZ Posts: 2036
Jul 24, 2008 10:44 PM GMT
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and a former "American Idol"...
kinetic Posts: 632
Jul 24, 2008 10:45 PM GMT
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reject, but should have won.
CuriousJockAZ Posts: 2036
Jul 24, 2008 10:46 PM GMT
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Of course, he blames Bush...
Sedative Posts: 5129
Jul 24, 2008 10:54 PM GMT
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for the massive FAIL in...
CuriousJockAZ Posts: 2036
Jul 24, 2008 10:59 PM GMT
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everything including chicken pox and...
Sedative Posts: 5129
Jul 24, 2008 11:05 PM GMT
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the tragic death of Catwoman.
innerathlete Posts: 487
Jul 24, 2008 11:11 PM GMT
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Rocko charged toward the glove...

(let's try to keep this somewhat on track, people!)
kinetic Posts: 632
Jul 24, 2008 11:12 PM GMT
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hoping to end it all.
CuriousJockAZ Posts: 2036
Jul 24, 2008 11:13 PM GMT
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Suddenly, Rosie O'Donnell announced...
Sedative Posts: 5129
Jul 24, 2008 11:18 PM GMT
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"That glove is MINE, fools!"
CuriousJockAZ Posts: 2036
Jul 24, 2008 11:19 PM GMT
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and snatched it before...
innerathlete Posts: 487
Jul 24, 2008 11:38 PM GMT
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Rocko could grab it for himself.
CuriousJockAZ Posts: 2036
Jul 24, 2008 11:56 PM GMT
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Out of nowhere, in walks...
Sedative Posts: 5129
Jul 24, 2008 11:59 PM GMT
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...Jay with a shotgun in...
CuriousJockAZ Posts: 2036
Jul 25, 2008 12:01 AM GMT
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full drag AND he's pissed!
irishboxers Posts: 327
Jul 25, 2008 12:02 AM GMT
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"Alright, you bitches, who put
CuriousJockAZ Posts: 2036
Jul 25, 2008 12:06 AM GMT
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Botox in my left testicle?
irishboxers Posts: 327
Jul 25, 2008 12:09 AM GMT
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It looks young again, but
CuriousJockAZ Posts: 2036
Jul 25, 2008 12:10 AM GMT
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I can't get a hardon
SilverBird Posts: 452
Jul 25, 2008 12:12 AM GMT
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Someone will pay for this
irishboxers Posts: 327
Jul 25, 2008 12:13 AM GMT
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and that boxing glove needs
Sedative Posts: 5129
Jul 25, 2008 12:15 AM GMT
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some more pink sequins!" He...
irishboxers Posts: 327
Jul 25, 2008 12:18 AM GMT
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gave his junk another tug,
Sedative Posts: 5129
Jul 25, 2008 12:27 AM GMT
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and proceeded to spray the...
irishboxers Posts: 327
Jul 25, 2008 12:37 AM GMT
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unsuspecting Tibetans with a suffocating
SilverBird Posts: 452
Jul 25, 2008 12:43 AM GMT
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irishboxers saidunsuspecting Tibetans with a suffocating


nerve gas that makes you
sluggo_la Posts: 102
Jul 25, 2008 12:46 AM GMT
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giggle like a school girl
muchmorethanm... Posts: 2553
Jul 25, 2008 12:50 AM GMT
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until you wet your panties....
sluggo_la Posts: 102
Jul 25, 2008 12:55 AM GMT
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the tibetans chanted in unison...
Hidden/Deleted Member
Jul 25, 2008 1:03 AM GMT
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"Don't TASE me bro!"...
sluggo_la Posts: 102
Jul 25, 2008 1:07 AM GMT
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and removed their saffron colored...
Hidden/Deleted Member
Jul 25, 2008 1:11 AM GMT
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pantyhose and whipped out their...
CuriousJockAZ Posts: 2036
Jul 25, 2008 1:15 AM GMT
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Mickey Mouse ears and...
Hidden/Deleted Member
Jul 25, 2008 1:17 AM GMT
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grabs Jay's shotgun with their
jaydub Posts: 549
Jul 25, 2008 1:34 AM GMT
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mind-bending ability. But Jay...
CuriousJockAZ Posts: 2036
Jul 25, 2008 1:36 AM GMT
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is hiding something shocking that...
KentuckyTuss Posts: 141
Jul 25, 2008 1:37 AM GMT
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(Damn guys. I can't even keep up! lol)
jaydub Posts: 549
Jul 25, 2008 1:38 AM GMT
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he can only reveal to...
sluggo_la Posts: 102
Jul 25, 2008 1:40 AM GMT
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estelle getty who is dead...
CuriousJockAZ Posts: 2036
Jul 25, 2008 1:41 AM GMT
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or Heath Ledge, also dead...
jaydub Posts: 549
Jul 25, 2008 1:41 AM GMT
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but holds the key to...
sluggo_la Posts: 102
Jul 25, 2008 1:44 AM GMT
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world peace and famine relief...
jaydub Posts: 549
Jul 25, 2008 1:46 AM GMT
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Suddenly, Jay receives a call...
sluggo_la Posts: 102
Jul 25, 2008 1:47 AM GMT
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the line suddenly goes dead...
jaydub Posts: 549
Jul 25, 2008 1:48 AM GMT
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he recognized the number, it...
SilverBird Posts: 452
Jul 25, 2008 1:49 AM GMT
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was the last guy he
CuriousJockAZ Posts: 2036
Jul 25, 2008 1:50 AM GMT
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met on realJock
jaydub Posts: 549
Jul 25, 2008 1:51 AM GMT
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Jay immediately booked a flight...
sluggo_la Posts: 102
Jul 25, 2008 1:55 AM GMT
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but forgot his passport at...
Slowdive Posts: 147
Jul 25, 2008 1:59 AM GMT
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the bank while withdrawing cash
VinBaltimore Posts: 180
Jul 25, 2008 2:01 AM GMT
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to pay his last trick
jaydub Posts: 549
Jul 25, 2008 2:05 AM GMT
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who ended up dead alongside...
CuriousJockAZ Posts: 2036
Jul 25, 2008 2:06 AM GMT
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the trick before that
sluggo_la Posts: 102
Jul 25, 2008 2:08 AM GMT
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found naked and half-eaten
jaydub Posts: 549
Jul 25, 2008 2:10 AM GMT
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in the woods by wolves.
VinBaltimore Posts: 180
Jul 25, 2008 2:11 AM GMT
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Luckily a spare passport was
jaydub Posts: 549
Jul 25, 2008 2:16 AM GMT
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but identifiable and readable, so...
Tyinstl Posts: 88
Jul 25, 2008 5:30 AM GMT
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VinBaltimore saidLuckily a spare passport was


found in the Tibetan pantyhose
RBY71 Posts: 2050
Jul 25, 2008 5:56 AM GMT
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which were quite horribly soiled....
TD22 Posts: 863
Jul 25, 2008 6:27 AM GMT
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But it was not His?
kinetic Posts: 632
Jul 25, 2008 7:38 AM GMT
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Or was it? Please discuss.
ursamajor Posts: 1261
Jul 25, 2008 12:55 PM GMT
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Cher says it was not
Sedative Posts: 5129
Jul 25, 2008 2:12 PM GMT
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, but who would believe her?
ChicGymGeek Posts: 725
Jul 25, 2008 2:35 PM GMT
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Most people would, except for...
palikari Posts: 137
Jul 25, 2008 2:39 PM GMT
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the bisexuals who felt alone
ChicGymGeek Posts: 725
Jul 25, 2008 2:43 PM GMT
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and alienated by Cher's tattoos...
CuriousJockAZ Posts: 2036
Jul 25, 2008 2:45 PM GMT
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and a pair of rednecks
Sedative Posts: 5129
Jul 25, 2008 2:46 PM GMT
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necking beneath the redwood grove.
CuriousJockAZ Posts: 2036
Jul 25, 2008 2:49 PM GMT
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Suddenly, the earth started shaking
ChicGymGeek Posts: 725
Jul 25, 2008 2:54 PM GMT
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and from below rose up...
LyteFyre Posts: 208
Jul 25, 2008 2:55 PM GMT
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Ms. Divine from the grave
jaydub Posts: 549
Jul 25, 2008 3:01 PM GMT
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along with Estelle and Heath.
LyteFyre Posts: 208
Jul 25, 2008 3:04 PM GMT
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like three pissed off and
ChicGymGeek Posts: 725
Jul 25, 2008 3:07 PM GMT
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and she bellowed tremdously, "Bitches..."
Sedative Posts: 5129
Jul 25, 2008 3:10 PM GMT
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Where the fuck is my...
Frank_AZ Posts: 96
Jul 25, 2008 3:16 PM GMT
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Oscar for my performance in
jeg75nh Posts: 5
Jul 25, 2008 3:27 PM GMT
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Steel Magnolias Two - Shelby Returns
Jockbod48 Posts: 1356
Jul 25, 2008 3:42 PM GMT
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from spending 3 years in prison
CuriousJockAZ Posts: 2036
Jul 25, 2008 3:51 PM GMT
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for faking an RJ profile
TD22 Posts: 863
Jul 25, 2008 3:54 PM GMT
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Then They Stalked Lol' Cat's
CuriousJockAZ Posts: 2036
Jul 25, 2008 3:58 PM GMT
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with a pitchfork and gasoline

RBY71 Posts: 2050
Jul 25, 2008 3:59 PM GMT
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so Ceiling Cat smited them...
Jockbod48 Posts: 1356
Jul 25, 2008 4:00 PM GMT
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and buried them forever
RBY71 Posts: 2050
Jul 25, 2008 4:01 PM GMT
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until Basement Cat resurrected them...
RBY71 Posts: 2050
Jul 25, 2008 4:02 PM GMT
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to do his evil bidding.....
closetsinger Posts: 77
Jul 25, 2008 4:27 PM GMT
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Suddenly Chucky appeared from nowhere.
Jockbod48 Posts: 1356
Jul 25, 2008 4:29 PM GMT
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Straight from the buffet
RBY71 Posts: 2050
Jul 25, 2008 4:31 PM GMT
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and MikePhil brandished his crucifix...
closetsinger Posts: 77
Jul 25, 2008 4:35 PM GMT
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But Chucky was not alone.
RBY71 Posts: 2050
Jul 25, 2008 4:47 PM GMT
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...he brought his flying monkeys...
RBY71 Posts: 2050
Jul 25, 2008 4:47 PM GMT
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...who had serious roid rage...
MikeAlva Posts: 249
Jul 25, 2008 4:48 PM GMT
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...but left the leases home...
RBY71 Posts: 2050
Jul 25, 2008 4:49 PM GMT
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...and they violently sodomized MikePhil...
RBY71 Posts: 2050
Jul 25, 2008 4:54 PM GMT
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...who was understandably quite irritated...
closetsinger Posts: 77
Jul 25, 2008 4:54 PM GMT
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That the g0ys were watching.
RBY71 Posts: 2050
Jul 25, 2008 4:57 PM GMT
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then frottaged him to death...
closetsinger Posts: 77
Jul 25, 2008 5:02 PM GMT
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It seemed one was forsaken
ursamajor Posts: 1261
Jul 25, 2008 5:07 PM GMT
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as the mystery seemed solved...............
closetsinger Posts: 77
Jul 25, 2008 5:10 PM GMT
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Yet down under ONE watched.
Jockbod48 Posts: 1356
Jul 25, 2008 5:24 PM GMT
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And through Zim's window he saw.....
ursamajor Posts: 1261
Jul 25, 2008 5:26 PM GMT
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a bottle of teeth whitener
LyteFyre Posts: 208
Jul 25, 2008 5:26 PM GMT
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Caslon approaching with his LOLCats!
ursamajor Posts: 1261
Jul 25, 2008 5:27 PM GMT
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and an abridged English dictionary
LyteFyre Posts: 208
Jul 25, 2008 5:32 PM GMT
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To smite those that don't...
ursamajor Posts: 1261
Jul 25, 2008 5:41 PM GMT
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know every Kangaroo sex position
sluggo_la Posts: 102
Jul 25, 2008 5:45 PM GMT
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meanwhile, back in tibet...
ursamajor Posts: 1261
Jul 25, 2008 5:48 PM GMT
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There was this Lhasa Apso
TD22 Posts: 863
Jul 25, 2008 5:51 PM GMT
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No not that Gay Monk
RBY71 Posts: 2050
Jul 25, 2008 9:51 PM GMT
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technically, he's a nun now...
Sedative Posts: 5129
Jul 25, 2008 9:56 PM GMT
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a flying transgender shaolin nun.

Tyinstl Posts: 88
Jul 26, 2008 7:51 AM GMT
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This thread makes me go


Little-known botany fact: mushroom trees are an abomination.

Also, those Buddhist monks must have felt a little lost in a synagogue.
closetsinger Posts: 77
Jul 26, 2008 8:14 AM GMT
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Sedative saida flying transgender shaolin nun.



bearing a clitoris and penis,
ursamajor Posts: 1261
Jul 26, 2008 11:37 AM GMT
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in a pretty little basket
CuriousJockAZ Posts: 2036
Jul 26, 2008 12:22 PM GMT
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so it's EASTER everyday!
TD22 Posts: 863
Jul 26, 2008 1:12 PM GMT
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He lost his Easter Eggs!
RBY71 Posts: 2050
Jul 26, 2008 2:11 PM GMT
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he thought they were suppositories...
Sedative Posts: 5129
Jul 26, 2008 2:42 PM GMT
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and had given them to...
Sedative Posts: 5129
Jul 26, 2008 2:44 PM GMT
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the easter bunny with hemorrhoids.
TD22 Posts: 863
Jul 26, 2008 3:11 PM GMT
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But he ate them instead?
CuriousJockAZ Posts: 2036
Jul 26, 2008 3:54 PM GMT
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And then was horribly constipated
mickeytopogig... Posts: 997
Jul 26, 2008 4:21 PM GMT
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after a severe titty twister
Hidden/Deleted Member
Jul 26, 2008 4:24 PM GMT
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so he took some Keopectate
TD22 Posts: 863
Jul 26, 2008 4:55 PM GMT
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And Died yeh Died!
Jockbod48 Posts: 1356
Jul 26, 2008 5:01 PM GMT
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----cops think Chucky killed him......
TD22 Posts: 863
Jul 26, 2008 5:03 PM GMT
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He had an Alibi?
Sedative Posts: 5129
Jul 26, 2008 9:52 PM GMT
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And they livedhappilyeverafter. THE END
cowboyathlete Posts: 226
Jul 27, 2008 1:06 AM GMT
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But Hollywood wanted a sequel...
TRACK THIS