[quote][cite]meninlove said[/cite] Hey Lima3016, I used to be shy to the point of painful. Anxiety would surge up in a choking tide when I was out and about. I carried an extra shirt in a back-pack because I would pit-sweat all the way down to my waist.
One day it came to me that my emotional and social muscles were just like my physical ones; what you don't use, you lose, and to an extent, no pain no gain.
So I initiated what I called 'Doug's Rule' lol.
Every day or night I went out. It could be a bar, a club, a coffee house, a juice bar. I had to speak with one person I didn't know, and try to do it for 10 minutes, then I was free to go home. Old young short tall skinny fat man woman child adult; it didn't matter. The focus was on giving them a little lift.
Many evenings I was home an hour later. I wasn't successful every time, but began to be. This went on for a few years.
Finally, one night in a crowded bar pounding with loud music, I saw Bill looking up at the overhead light show (you know, big metal racks with spinning lights etc) that was wobbling in a rickety way.
I walked over to him, not thinking, it had become so routine, leaned forward to his ear from slightly behind him and said in a Data (Star Trek) type conversational tone,
"If there's an earthquake, we're all going to die."
The rest, as they say, is history.
[excellent advise men, I will try that my friend!