Sluttyness and LTR potential value..

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 01, 2012 10:54 PM GMT
    Is there a correlation? I'm generally very put off by guys who sleep around a lot. A lot of my friends do it but I dont feel they're anything below me or anything but they're just different and I accept that.

    I'm trying to understand why I have an aversion against guys that are too easy and probably just look at you like meat or will be on the hunt/throw themselves after the next guy that walks in.

    I feel I'm better than that and I deserve better guys when it comes to dating. As much as I love sex and have super high sex drive, I consciously chose to give that part of me to a guy who deserves it and I respect myself, I feel that maybe that's what defines Character.

    i'm asking this because I recently dumped a really gorgeous guy because he slept around in the month we were dating and I felt his Character wasn't suitable and I even turned down having sex with him. I don't even know why I thought that but that was my instinct.

    Wondering if there are others who think in a similar fashion. sorry if I bored you guys icon_smile.gif
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    Jun 02, 2012 12:13 AM GMT
    Disappointment builds Character.

    If you don't sleep around, you won't have enough Character to sweep Mr. Right off his feet when he comes along.
  • m0dern

    Posts: 32

    Jun 02, 2012 4:08 AM GMT
    FootballHawk saidIs there a correlation? I'm generally very put off by guys who sleep around a lot. A lot of my friends do it but I dont feel they're anything below me or anything but they're just different and I accept that.

    I'm trying to understand why I have an aversion against guys that are too easy and probably just look at you like meat or will be on the hunt/throw themselves after the next guy that walks in.

    I feel I'm better than that and I deserve better guys when it comes to dating. As much as I love sex and have super high sex drive, I consciously chose to give that part of me to a guy who deserves it and I respect myself, I feel that maybe that's what defines Character.

    i'm asking this because I recently dumped a really gorgeous guy because he slept around in the month we were dating and I felt his Character wasn't suitable and I even turned down having sex with him. I don't even know why I thought that but that was my instinct.

    Wondering if there are others who think in a similar fashion. sorry if I bored you guys icon_smile.gif


    I agree with you. I want someone with integrity and respect for themself and their partner. To me a sexually promiscuous man who has to sleep with anyone with a half decent body...is nothing but a weak man.
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    Jun 02, 2012 4:46 AM GMT
    Well obviously the guy who slept around on you has bad character! But don't let that form a hang-up for you. There exist guys who like to slut it up, but when they are in relationship-mode, they are solidly committed. Maybe just scrutinize ones that seem slutty more than you would a virg.

    Letting an ex leave you with a hangup is letting them win.
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    Jun 02, 2012 6:06 PM GMT
    SkinnyBitch saidWell obviously the guy who slept around on you has bad character! But don't let that form a hang-up for you. There exist guys who like to slut it up, but when they are in relationship-mode, they are solidly committed. Maybe just scrutinize ones that seem slutty more than you would a virg.

    Letting an ex leave you with a hangup is letting them win.


    Thanks! I don't think I have any grudges about exes, I meant I don't even think of them, I'm only trying to understand why im so turned off by guys who are so easy or will practically flirt with everyone.. I guess even straight guys feel the same way when It comes to women.
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    Jun 02, 2012 6:11 PM GMT
    I have some issues with this too. it seems more like a hangover of christian morality (sex->sin->bad/dirty) so I try to stifle these attitudes in myself as much as possible... my new conclusion is that I'm not really interested in "avoiding the manwhores" so much as finding someone who appreciates the emotional side of sex as much as I do.
  • Splendidus_1

    Posts: 611

    Jun 02, 2012 6:13 PM GMT
    FootballHawk saidIs there a correlation? I'm generally very put off by guys who sleep around a lot. A lot of my friends do it but I dont feel they're anything below me or anything but they're just different and I accept that.

    I'm trying to understand why I have an aversion against guys that are too easy and probably just look at you like meat or will be on the hunt/throw themselves after the next guy that walks in.

    I feel I'm better than that and I deserve better guys when it comes to dating. As much as I love sex and have super high sex drive, I consciously chose to give that part of me to a guy who deserves it and I respect myself, I feel that maybe that's what defines Character.

    i'm asking this because I recently dumped a really gorgeous guy because he slept around in the month we were dating and I felt his Character wasn't suitable and I even turned down having sex with him. I don't even know why I thought that but that was my instinct.

    Wondering if there are others who think in a similar fashion. sorry if I bored you guys icon_smile.gif


    I've been dealing with this kind of struggle. I'm exactly like you when it comes to sex drive, and still, I've only had one experience with a guy so far. I decided that I'll wait for the right guy to come around (and no, I don't mean Mr.Perfect-On-A-White-Horse), but a guy who wants to commit and grow together. Knowing a guy "slutted" around may be a turn-off .. but depending on how he approaches/talks to me, I may simply overlook it.
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    Jun 02, 2012 6:13 PM GMT
    FootballHawk saidIs there a correlation? I'm generally very put off by guys who sleep around a lot. A lot of my friends do it but I dont feel they're anything below me or anything but they're just different and I accept that.

    I'm trying to understand why I have an aversion against guys that are too easy and probably just look at you like meat or will be on the hunt/throw themselves after the next guy that walks in.

    I feel I'm better than that and I deserve better guys when it comes to dating. As much as I love sex and have super high sex drive, I consciously chose to give that part of me to a guy who deserves it and I respect myself, I feel that maybe that's what defines Character.

    i'm asking this because I recently dumped a really gorgeous guy because he slept around in the month we were dating and I felt his Character wasn't suitable and I even turned down having sex with him. I don't even know why I thought that but that was my instinct.

    Wondering if there are others who think in a similar fashion. sorry if I bored you guys icon_smile.gif


    The dude had sex with other men. He didnt marry or profess his undying love for them. Unless u were in a monogomous relationship with him, whats the prob?

    Btw women are sluts. We are not women. We are men. And men that have alot of sex have great sex lives.

    Men are also not easy. Women are easy. Men are virile.
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    Jun 02, 2012 6:15 PM GMT
    Splendidus_1 said
    FootballHawk saidIs there a correlation? I'm generally very put off by guys who sleep around a lot. A lot of my friends do it but I dont feel they're anything below me or anything but they're just different and I accept that.

    I'm trying to understand why I have an aversion against guys that are too easy and probably just look at you like meat or will be on the hunt/throw themselves after the next guy that walks in.

    I feel I'm better than that and I deserve better guys when it comes to dating. As much as I love sex and have super high sex drive, I consciously chose to give that part of me to a guy who deserves it and I respect myself, I feel that maybe that's what defines Character.

    i'm asking this because I recently dumped a really gorgeous guy because he slept around in the month we were dating and I felt his Character wasn't suitable and I even turned down having sex with him. I don't even know why I thought that but that was my instinct.

    Wondering if there are others who think in a similar fashion. sorry if I bored you guys icon_smile.gif


    I've been dealing with this kind of struggle. I'm exactly like you when it comes to sex drive, and still, I've only had one experience with a guy so far. I decided that I'll wait for the right guy to come around (and no, I don't mean Mr.Perfect-On-A-White-Horse), but a guy who wants to commit and grow together. Knowing a guy "slutted" around may be a turn-off .. but depending on how he approaches/talks to me, I may simply overlook it.


    So what if you wait, find the 100% perfect guy, grow with him, make a monogomous commitment, have sex, and the sex is fucking lousy as hell....then what?
  • Splendidus_1

    Posts: 611

    Jun 02, 2012 6:22 PM GMT
    catfish5 said
    Splendidus_1 said
    FootballHawk said


    So what if you wait, find the 100% perfect guy, grow with him, make a monogomous commitment, have sex, and the sex is fucking lousy as hell....then what?


    I get what you mean, but really? If I connect with a guy, we get along really well, but the sex turns out not to be that good, I would surely try to do something about it, instead of simply saying "Sex is lousy, we can't be together, sorry". Sex is an action nonetheless, it can be mastered? Practice makes perfect, right? I wouldn't say no to that, haha. And that depends on how much you value sex, though. A guy who's there for me may just seal the deal for me. And cuddly, he has to like cuddling.
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    Jun 02, 2012 6:33 PM GMT
    Splendidus_1 said
    catfish5 said
    Splendidus_1 said
    FootballHawk said


    So what if you wait, find the 100% perfect guy, grow with him, make a monogomous commitment, have sex, and the sex is fucking lousy as hell....then what?


    I get what you mean, but really? If I connect with a guy, we get along really well, but the sex turns out not to be that good, I would surely try to do something about it, instead of simply saying "Sex is lousy, we can't be together, sorry". Sex is an action nonetheless, it can be mastered? Practice makes perfect, right? I wouldn't say no to that, haha. And that depends on how much you value sex, though. A guy who's there for me may just seal the deal for me. And cuddly, he has to like cuddling.


    Sex is a HUGE part of a relationship. If u have no experience or practice at it, it wont be good. Sex is a skill. And if u are both tops or both bottoms, then what? Find a third? Whats the aversion to sex? Its a natural physical act.

  • Splendidus_1

    Posts: 611

    Jun 02, 2012 6:43 PM GMT
    catfish5 said
    Splendidus_1 said
    catfish5 said
    Splendidus_1 said
    FootballHawk said


    So what if you wait, find the 100% perfect guy, grow with him, make a monogomous commitment, have sex, and the sex is fucking lousy as hell....then what?


    I get what you mean, but really? If I connect with a guy, we get along really well, but the sex turns out not to be that good, I would surely try to do something about it, instead of simply saying "Sex is lousy, we can't be together, sorry". Sex is an action nonetheless, it can be mastered? Practice makes perfect, right? I wouldn't say no to that, haha. And that depends on how much you value sex, though. A guy who's there for me may just seal the deal for me. And cuddly, he has to like cuddling.


    Sex is a HUGE part of a relationship. If u have no experience or practice at it, it wont be good. Sex is a skill. And if u are both tops or both bottoms, then what? Find a third? Whats the aversion to sex? Its a natural physical act.


    Debatable. Sex may be a HUGE part of a relationship, but that may not be true. And it's like you say, it's a part of a relationship, the rest cares as well. See it as a pie.. the % you attribute to sex varies from person to person.

    The first time I had sex, the guy (who clearly had its experience) said he did not believe I was a virgin - trying to make a point here - so I can refute what you said there. He may have lied, yeah, but I honestly think I knew what I was doing - Access to porn, and following what the other person does - not that hard in my opinion, haha.
    I'm versatile, again, that doesn't apply to both of us being strictly one of them, I don't mind adjusting on this matter, because what excites me the most, is knowing I'm giving pleasure to someone I care about. That's my view on sex - instead of simply getting off.
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    Jun 02, 2012 6:51 PM GMT
    Splendidus_1 said
    catfish5 said
    Splendidus_1 said
    catfish5 said
    Splendidus_1 said
    FootballHawk said


    So what if you wait, find the 100% perfect guy, grow with him, make a monogomous commitment, have sex, and the sex is fucking lousy as hell....then what?


    I get what you mean, but really? If I connect with a guy, we get along really well, but the sex turns out not to be that good, I would surely try to do something about it, instead of simply saying "Sex is lousy, we can't be together, sorry". Sex is an action nonetheless, it can be mastered? Practice makes perfect, right? I wouldn't say no to that, haha. And that depends on how much you value sex, though. A guy who's there for me may just seal the deal for me. And cuddly, he has to like cuddling.


    Sex is a HUGE part of a relationship. If u have no experience or practice at it, it wont be good. Sex is a skill. And if u are both tops or both bottoms, then what? Find a third? Whats the aversion to sex? Its a natural physical act.


    Debatable. Sex may be a HUGE part of a relationship, but that may not be true. And it's like you say, it's a part of a relationship, the rest cares as well. See it as a pie.. the % you attribute to sex varies from person to person.

    The first time I had sex, the guy (who clearly had its experience) said he did not believe I was a virgin - trying to make a point here - so I can refute what you said there. He may have lied, yeah, but I honestly think I knew what I was doing - Access to porn, and following what the other person does - not that hard in my opinion, haha.
    I'm versatile, again, that doesn't apply to both of us being strictly one of them, I don't mind adjusting on this matter, because what excites me the most, is knowing I'm giving pleasure to someone I care about. That's my view on sex - instead of simply getting off.


    And after 20 years of being with the same person and the sex is nonexistent, will u wonder what its like to have sex with different hot guys or just accept that your sex life sux.
  • Splendidus_1

    Posts: 611

    Jun 02, 2012 6:59 PM GMT
    catfish5 said
    Splendidus_1 said
    catfish5 said
    Splendidus_1 said
    catfish5 said
    Splendidus_1 said
    FootballHawk said


    So what if you wait, find the 100% perfect guy, grow with him, make a monogomous commitment, have sex, and the sex is fucking lousy as hell....then what?


    I get what you mean, but really? If I connect with a guy, we get along really well, but the sex turns out not to be that good, I would surely try to do something about it, instead of simply saying "Sex is lousy, we can't be together, sorry". Sex is an action nonetheless, it can be mastered? Practice makes perfect, right? I wouldn't say no to that, haha. And that depends on how much you value sex, though. A guy who's there for me may just seal the deal for me. And cuddly, he has to like cuddling.


    Sex is a HUGE part of a relationship. If u have no experience or practice at it, it wont be good. Sex is a skill. And if u are both tops or both bottoms, then what? Find a third? Whats the aversion to sex? Its a natural physical act.


    Debatable. Sex may be a HUGE part of a relationship, but that may not be true. And it's like you say, it's a part of a relationship, the rest cares as well. See it as a pie.. the % you attribute to sex varies from person to person.

    The first time I had sex, the guy (who clearly had its experience) said he did not believe I was a virgin - trying to make a point here - so I can refute what you said there. He may have lied, yeah, but I honestly think I knew what I was doing - Access to porn, and following what the other person does - not that hard in my opinion, haha.
    I'm versatile, again, that doesn't apply to both of us being strictly one of them, I don't mind adjusting on this matter, because what excites me the most, is knowing I'm giving pleasure to someone I care about. That's my view on sex - instead of simply getting off.


    And after 20 years of being with the same person and the sex is nonexistent, will u wonder what its like to have sex with different hot guys or just accept that your sex life sux.


    Actually, I believe in 20 years, sex would have got better haha. I think we have different views on the all dating thing. I'm LTR oriented, so I don't find "sex" to be the key factor when finding someone. Seriously, if I find a hot guy, great body and a cute face, with a personality that matches mine, with a baby penis who's lousy at sex, I'd most likely stay with him. That must mean something.

    Honestly, my sex life is not what I value the most.
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    Jun 02, 2012 7:16 PM GMT
    Splendidus_1 said
    catfish5 said
    Splendidus_1 said
    catfish5 said
    Splendidus_1 said
    catfish5 said
    Splendidus_1 said
    FootballHawk said


    So what if you wait, find the 100% perfect guy, grow with him, make a monogomous commitment, have sex, and the sex is fucking lousy as hell....then what?


    I get what you mean, but really? If I connect with a guy, we get along really well, but the sex turns out not to be that good, I would surely try to do something about it, instead of simply saying "Sex is lousy, we can't be together, sorry". Sex is an action nonetheless, it can be mastered? Practice makes perfect, right? I wouldn't say no to that, haha. And that depends on how much you value sex, though. A guy who's there for me may just seal the deal for me. And cuddly, he has to like cuddling.


    Sex is a HUGE part of a relationship. If u have no experience or practice at it, it wont be good. Sex is a skill. And if u are both tops or both bottoms, then what? Find a third? Whats the aversion to sex? Its a natural physical act.


    Debatable. Sex may be a HUGE part of a relationship, but that may not be true. And it's like you say, it's a part of a relationship, the rest cares as well. See it as a pie.. the % you attribute to sex varies from person to person.

    The first time I had sex, the guy (who clearly had its experience) said he did not believe I was a virgin - trying to make a point here - so I can refute what you said there. He may have lied, yeah, but I honestly think I knew what I was doing - Access to porn, and following what the other person does - not that hard in my opinion, haha.
    I'm versatile, again, that doesn't apply to both of us being strictly one of them, I don't mind adjusting on this matter, because what excites me the most, is knowing I'm giving pleasure to someone I care about. That's my view on sex - instead of simply getting off.


    And after 20 years of being with the same person and the sex is nonexistent, will u wonder what its like to have sex with different hot guys or just accept that your sex life sux.


    Actually, I believe in 20 years, sex would have got better haha. I think we have different views on the all dating thing. I'm LTR oriented, so I don't find "sex" to be the key factor when finding someone. Seriously, if I find a hot guy, great body and a cute face, with a personality that matches mine, with a baby penis who's lousy at sex, I'd most likely stay with him. That must mean something.

    Honestly, my sex life is not what I value the most.


    You must be 20 years old with not much life experience. Young gay males have a tendency to be a bit naive an unrealistic at this age. You kinda fit the bill. Things change ALOT when u experience reality and have had several relationships come and go. Big difference between your views at 20 compared to 30.
  • Splendidus_1

    Posts: 611

    Jun 02, 2012 7:27 PM GMT
    catfish5 said
    Splendidus_1 said
    catfish5 said
    Splendidus_1 said
    catfish5 said
    Splendidus_1 said
    catfish5 said
    Splendidus_1 said
    FootballHawk said


    So what if you wait, find the 100% perfect guy, grow with him, make a monogomous commitment, have sex, and the sex is fucking lousy as hell....then what?


    I get what you mean, but really? If I connect with a guy, we get along really well, but the sex turns out not to be that good, I would surely try to do something about it, instead of simply saying "Sex is lousy, we can't be together, sorry". Sex is an action nonetheless, it can be mastered? Practice makes perfect, right? I wouldn't say no to that, haha. And that depends on how much you value sex, though. A guy who's there for me may just seal the deal for me. And cuddly, he has to like cuddling.


    Sex is a HUGE part of a relationship. If u have no experience or practice at it, it wont be good. Sex is a skill. And if u are both tops or both bottoms, then what? Find a third? Whats the aversion to sex? Its a natural physical act.


    Debatable. Sex may be a HUGE part of a relationship, but that may not be true. And it's like you say, it's a part of a relationship, the rest cares as well. See it as a pie.. the % you attribute to sex varies from person to person.

    The first time I had sex, the guy (who clearly had its experience) said he did not believe I was a virgin - trying to make a point here - so I can refute what you said there. He may have lied, yeah, but I honestly think I knew what I was doing - Access to porn, and following what the other person does - not that hard in my opinion, haha.
    I'm versatile, again, that doesn't apply to both of us being strictly one of them, I don't mind adjusting on this matter, because what excites me the most, is knowing I'm giving pleasure to someone I care about. That's my view on sex - instead of simply getting off.


    And after 20 years of being with the same person and the sex is nonexistent, will u wonder what its like to have sex with different hot guys or just accept that your sex life sux.


    Actually, I believe in 20 years, sex would have got better haha. I think we have different views on the all dating thing. I'm LTR oriented, so I don't find "sex" to be the key factor when finding someone. Seriously, if I find a hot guy, great body and a cute face, with a personality that matches mine, with a baby penis who's lousy at sex, I'd most likely stay with him. That must mean something.

    Honestly, my sex life is not what I value the most.


    You must be 20 years old with not much life experience. Young gay males have a tendency to be a bit naive an unrealistic at this age. You kinda fit the bill. Things change ALOT when u experience reality and have had several relationships come and go. Big difference between your views at 20 compared to 30.


    I knew my opinion would be disregarged due to my age. Even though my vision on certain matters will change, I find this to be at my core, what defines me. I don't hook-up, that for itself says something, since at my age what you see is "YOLO", fucking like rabbits and shit like that. I care about people, think they have more value than a simple sex vehicle.
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    Jun 02, 2012 7:42 PM GMT
    Everyone is idealistic at your age. But once you have been in a few relationships and had your heart broken a time or two, you get a bit more realistic. Some people get to the point that they just emotionally dont want a relationship and just do hookups. And maybe during one of those hookups, they meet someone that is so amazing that the hookup becomes the love of your life. Never say that you will never do something because inevitably you will.
  • Splendidus_1

    Posts: 611

    Jun 02, 2012 7:53 PM GMT
    catfish5 saidEveryone is idealistic at your age. But once you have been in a few relationships and had your heart broken a time or two, you get a bit more realistic. Some people get to the point that they just emotionally dont want a relationship and just do hookups. And maybe during one of those hookups, they meet someone that is so amazing that the hookup becomes the love of your life. Never say that you will never do something because inevitably you will.


    Notice that I never said I'd never would, haha. My single experience with a guy was a hook-up, and I didn't like it. Yeah, the sex was good, but after it finished, it didn't feel good at all. I think about sex 24/7, but that doesn't mean I'll use the person next to me. I actually would like to be able to hook-up, I feel I may be losing some opportunities, like that. It seems that nowadays people get to know each other by having sex (?), so I face it, instead of trying to deny it.

    Maybe I have to wait for my heart to get broken (I actually made a thread about that a while ago), then I may see it differently, but for now that's where I stand.
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    Jun 02, 2012 8:01 PM GMT
    Splendidus_1 said
    catfish5 saidEveryone is idealistic at your age. But once you have been in a few relationships and had your heart broken a time or two, you get a bit more realistic. Some people get to the point that they just emotionally dont want a relationship and just do hookups. And maybe during one of those hookups, they meet someone that is so amazing that the hookup becomes the love of your life. Never say that you will never do something because inevitably you will.


    Notice that I never said I'd never would, haha. My single experience with a guy was a hook-up, and I didn't like it. Yeah, the sex was good, but after it finished, it didn't feel good at all. I think about sex 24/7, but that doesn't mean I'll use the person next to me. I actually would like to be able to hook-up, I feel I may be losing some opportunities, like that. It seems that nowadays people get to know each other by having sex (?), so I face it, instead of trying to deny it.

    Maybe I have to wait for my heart to get broken (I actually made a thread about that a while ago), then I may see it differently, but for now that's where I stand.


    U prolly dont have the same views now that u did 10 years ago. In 2022, u wont have nearly the same views as u do now either. Things can change drastically. Even your core values.

    But why deny yourself sex? Are you afraid of something? Why did u feel empty after your first hookup? Were u expecting something more than just getting your rox off?
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    Jun 02, 2012 8:10 PM GMT
    catfish5 saidEveryone is idealistic at your age. But once you have been in a few relationships and had your heart broken a time or two, you get a bit more realistic. Some people get to the point that they just emotionally dont want a relationship and just do hookups. And maybe during one of those hookups, they meet someone that is so amazing that the hookup becomes the love of your life. Never say that you will never do something because inevitably you will.


    I think you're projecting here, QUITE a bit! Let him live his own life and have his own experiences, for fuck's sake.

    Your experience was just that, YOUR experience. Clearly something(s) happened to you along the way that gave you this bitter attitude, but don't let what happened to you jade this young man! If he wants to maintain an idealistic attitude about sex and relationships, good for him!

    And please do not pretend to speak for me, someone who's a "few" years beyond the OP's age...it has nothing to do with the number of years you've been on this green earth.

    @ Splendidus_1 - Don't give up on what you want or sacrifice your morals because of what some bitter guy tells you in an online forum. The guy you're looking for is probably out there, and I hope you find him!
  • PolaroidSwing...

    Posts: 1131

    Jun 02, 2012 8:17 PM GMT
    catfish5 said
    FootballHawk said
    Btw women are sluts. We are not women. We are men. And men that have alot of sex have great sex lives.

    Men are also not easy. Women are easy. Men are virile.




    Are you being facetious?
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    Jun 02, 2012 8:17 PM GMT
    dd_bosmvy said
    catfish5 saidEveryone is idealistic at your age. But once you have been in a few relationships and had your heart broken a time or two, you get a bit more realistic. Some people get to the point that they just emotionally dont want a relationship and just do hookups. And maybe during one of those hookups, they meet someone that is so amazing that the hookup becomes the love of your life. Never say that you will never do something because inevitably you will.


    I think you're projecting here, QUITE a bit! Let him live his own life and have his own experiences, for fuck's sake.

    Your experience was just that, YOUR experience. Clearly something(s) happened to you along the way that gave you this bitter attitude, but don't let what happened to you jade this young man! If he wants to maintain an idealistic attitude about sex and relationships, good for him!

    And please do not pretend to speak for me, someone who's a "few" years beyond the OP's age...it has nothing to do with the number of years you've been on this green earth.

    @ OP - Don't give up on what you want or sacrifice your morals because of what some bitter guy tells you in an online forum. The guy you're looking for is probably out there, and I hope you find him!


    Oh yes. Hes got to live life as i determine he should. Lol

    Not sure why u think im bitter. Im actually very laid back with lno hangups about sex.

    At 39, i have alot of life experience and had a similar outlook as him at one point. Lots of people do.

    Not sure why you are so angry? Maybe your just a nasty person. I dunno.

    Chill dude. Dont get your headless torsos panties in a wad. Its just a discussion. Nothing more.

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    Jun 02, 2012 8:26 PM GMT
    Your attitude is interesting... I'm glad that you don't judge your friends who are more promiscuous than you are... I don't view it as a GOOD/BAD dichotomy the way many do.... it's just that people have different attitudes about promiscuity. In the gay world, many people have worked VERY hard to overcome feelings of guilt and shame associated with sex.... well not JUST In the gay world, but especially in the gay world.

    So it's a complicated issue and one that you should probably continue to reflect on. You show maturity and that's promising. I'm not saying that you should become promiscuous or overcome your feelings, but it might simply be the sex is something very special to you that you want to share with persons with whom you are emotionally intimate. And that's NOT a bad thing. But lots of people judge guys who share sex easily, and I do think that that kind of judgment is a bad thing. If you enter into a relationship and explain your attitude toward sex and your partner does not share the same attitude then you will not likely be a good couple.

    But you may find that over time your attitude evolves. I know friends who used to be quite promiscuous but who over time feel less need to have sex and share it less than they used to. I also have friends who used to reserve sex for very intimate relationships who now are more free hooking up. As long as you know what motivates you and your behaviours I think it's fine and I think it's normal that people have different attitudes about this issue. But I also get tired of monogamous types who judge people in open relationships, most open couples do not judge monogamy, and I think that the judgment when it comes to promiscuity is usually from the "SEX = DIRTY/BAD" camp.... and less often from the SLUTTY/HO camp.... LOL...

    Just my two cents worth.... I'd be interested in others' reactions.

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    Jun 02, 2012 8:26 PM GMT
    PolaroidSwinger said
    catfish5 said
    FootballHawk said
    Btw women are sluts. We are not women. We are men. And men that have alot of sex have great sex lives.

    Men are also not easy. Women are easy. Men are virile.




    Are you being facetious?


    No im not. Alot of gay men refer to themselves in terms used to degrade females. I dont get it. Str8 men dont call each other easy or sluts. They high five each other after each chick they nailed.
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    Jun 02, 2012 8:28 PM GMT
    speedobuddy saidYour attitude is interesting... I'm glad that you don't judge your friends who are more promiscuous than you are... I don't view it as a GOOD/BAD dichotomy the way many do.... it's just that people have different attitudes about promiscuity. In the gay world, many people have worked VERY hard to overcome feelings of guilt and shame associated with sex.... well not JUST In the gay world, but especially in the gay world.

    So it's a complicated issue and one that you should probably continue to reflect on. You show maturity and that's promising. I'm not saying that you should become promiscuous or overcome your feelings, but it might simply be the sex is something very special to you that you want to share with persons with whom you are emotionally intimate. And that's NOT a bad thing. But lots of people judge guys who share sex easily, and I do think that that kind of judgment is a bad thing. If you enter into a relationship and explain your attitude toward sex and your partner does not share the same attitude then you will not likely be a good couple.

    But you may find that over time your attitude evolves. I know friends who used to be quite promiscuous but who over time feel less need to have sex and share it less than they used to. I also have friends who used to reserve sex for very intimate relationships who now are more free hooking up. As long as you know what motivates you and your behaviours I think it's fine and I think it's normal that people have different attitudes about this issue. But I also get tired of monogamous types who judge people in open relationships, most open couples do not judge monogamy, and I think that the judgment when it comes to promiscuity is usually from the "SEX = DIRTY/BAD" camp.... and less often from the SLUTTY/HO camp.... LOL...

    Just my two cents worth.... I'd be interested in others' reactions.



    Yes. This is what i was trying to say but you worded so much better. Thanks