DATE A GAY BARTENDER? YES or NO

  • runnin_stud

    Posts: 54

    Jun 02, 2012 9:02 PM GMT
    Growing up, it was difficult to find a boyfriend I could trust. I know trust is built upon time with anyone; however, I am interested in hearing your thoughts regarding your initial interests/trust instincts in that "prototype" hot bartender you can't keep your eyes off of. Sound off below :-P
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    Jun 02, 2012 9:05 PM GMT
    Depends. If you're looking for monogamy, dating a bartender can be rough if he works in a gay bar. I think it also has a lot to do with your trust and security levels.
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    Jun 02, 2012 9:11 PM GMT
    OP is the hot barkeep ;)
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    Jun 02, 2012 9:14 PM GMT
    Scruffypup saidDepends. If you're looking for monogamy, dating a bartender can be rough if he works in a gay bar. I think it also has a lot to do with your trust and security levels.


    Even if you have a monogamous relationship with a bartender, you can't be a jealous person. Flirting and being friendly with customers is part of the job. And on the note, if you are interested in a bartender you have to be careful not to confuse him having interest in you with him just doing his job.
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    Jun 02, 2012 9:30 PM GMT
    Iceblink said
    Scruffypup saidDepends. If you're looking for monogamy, dating a bartender can be rough if he works in a gay bar. I think it also has a lot to do with your trust and security levels.


    Even if you have a monogamous relationship with a bartender, you can't be a jealous person. Flirting and being friendly with customers is part of the job. And on the note, if you are interested in a bartender you have to be careful not to confuse him having interest in you with him just doing his job.


    Exactly

    It's his job to be nice to u and get u drunk. He's a hired gun.
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    Jun 02, 2012 10:08 PM GMT
    Iceblink said
    Scruffypup saidDepends. If you're looking for monogamy, dating a bartender can be rough if he works in a gay bar. I think it also has a lot to do with your trust and security levels.


    Even if you have a monogamous relationship with a bartender, you can't be a jealous person. Flirting and being friendly with customers is part of the job. And on the note, if you are interested in a bartender you have to be careful not to confuse him having interest in you with him just doing his job.



    That's kind of what I was trying to say. icon_rolleyes.gif
  • Trepeat

    Posts: 546

    Jun 02, 2012 10:20 PM GMT
    I had a buddy who was a gay bar tender. Great guy, very seriously into monogamy and forming deep, intimate relationships. Said that years of working at a gay bar made him pretty disgusted with some of the behaviour that he saw there.

    On the other hand, there are also gay bar tenders who are complete fuckwads (coughYCYLcough). It all depends on the individual.

    If the two of you have genuine chemistry, and you have enough trust in both him and your relationship, as well as a strong sense of security, go for it. icon_smile.gif
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    Jun 02, 2012 10:31 PM GMT
    Everyone is an individual. Jobs are jobs.

    Get to know the person. Despite the job. You'll know if you share the same values...or not.
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    Jun 02, 2012 11:26 PM GMT
    Definitely depends on where they work. Some bars are laid back and the bar tending is no different from another hospitality job. Some bars are much more intense.

    I wouldn't/couldn't date someone who was frequently hit on at their job.
  • mybud

    Posts: 11837

    Jun 03, 2012 1:40 AM GMT
    A great gay bartender does two things....Makes strong ass drinks and Flirts his ass off if they be the beauty or the beast...If you can understand this rationale...by all means date him...If you have a jealous demeanor...move on...
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    Jun 03, 2012 1:46 AM GMT
    If it was you yeah! lol
    A lifer in the gay bar scene tho, probs not.

    Currently chasing after a Gogo dancer. FML lol
  • melloyello

    Posts: 149

    Jun 03, 2012 2:05 AM GMT
    As a former/sometimes current bartender at a internationally known dance club, I can say that I've frequently become pretty disgusted with the drama and behavior I've seen played out after a couple of vodka tonics are downed. I've seen people I know are partnered come ask me for a pen to give their # out to a guy they were just making out with on the dancefloor. I also get hit on quite a bit (although not nearly as much as people think). That being said, I relished coming home to my then-boyfriend after a night of needy drunk queens. All I wanted at 4am was to crawl into bed and curl up next to him.

    A side effect of working in a bar has taught me that everything is the same. You're not "missing" anything by not going out. I have traveled pretty extensively and while I like checking out the scene in different places, I'm fine with a 10 minute one drink excursion just to see how it is. I could not go out more then once every other week if I was working. Its also taught me how to handle my liquor and how to act in public. Trust me, the pretentious queen you see at 10pm is the one I'm scraping off the ground whos mumbling about how much it sucks to be alone at 2am.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 03, 2012 2:40 AM GMT
    Never.
    Bad hours, hangs out with drunks and hot, drunk guys throw themselves at him, all the time.
    Nope.
    Plus, if he had half a functioning brain, he'd have a real job.
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    Jun 03, 2012 2:43 AM GMT
    No. Just....no.
  • Import

    Posts: 7190

    Jun 03, 2012 2:58 AM GMT
    dude, honestly....not to sound snobby or like a bitch or anything, but why would u wanna date a lowly bartender? I mean, do u see long-term security and comfort in that field?

    is this man educated? Is he worth dating? Is he good enough for you?

    I feel like bartending jobs are for like college kids or people fresh out of college in transition into an actual career...
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    Jun 03, 2012 3:09 AM GMT
    Import saiddude, honestly....not to sound snobby or like a bitch or anything, but why would u wanna date a lowly bartender? I mean, do u see long-term security and comfort in that field?

    is this man educated? Is he worth dating? Is he good enough for you?

    I feel like bartending jobs are for like college kids or people fresh out of college in transition into an actual career...


    I agree, some men here need a lesson in standards. I would never date a guy without a education or career because they are just low life bottom of the barrel leeches.
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    Jun 03, 2012 3:14 AM GMT
    Import saiddude, honestly....not to sound snobby or like a bitch or anything, but why would u wanna date a lowly bartender? I mean, do u see long-term security and comfort in that field?

    is this man educated? Is he worth dating? Is he good enough for you?

    I feel like bartending jobs are for like college kids or people fresh out of college in transition into an actual career...



    I would have to agree with that in most cities, but here in New Orleans, many people are career bartenders because we have a strong tourist market and you can make a lot of money doing it. It is definitely not considered a "lowly" career here.
  • Import

    Posts: 7190

    Jun 03, 2012 3:28 AM GMT
    OP: If it's just dating him, sure why not?

    But if you're looking to have a long term BF situation, I reckon it will eventually fizzle out between the two of you. Bartender schedules are long, late night. People like urself that will most likey have a "day job" will not see ur bf often because when u come home at night, bartender boy is gearing up for a busy night at the local watering hole. You'll be going to bed alone, prob wondering what he's doing, when he'll be home....just like a lonely housewife.

    but for dating? yeah man go for it.


    oh and scruffy, i know what u mean, but their schedules are just too much...too fucking late all the time. And on a more shallow note: after years of bartending, they tend to look old and haggard before their time, imo. Sunken eyes, lack of sleep, lack of sunlight really (work all night sleep all day), just end up looking like hell after a while.
  • str8hardbody9

    Posts: 1519

    Jun 03, 2012 3:32 AM GMT
    definitely NO..NO & NO
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    Jun 03, 2012 3:41 AM GMT
    dontknowwhy said
    Import saiddude, honestly....not to sound snobby or like a bitch or anything, but why would u wanna date a lowly bartender? I mean, do u see long-term security and comfort in that field?

    is this man educated? Is he worth dating? Is he good enough for you?

    I feel like bartending jobs are for like college kids or people fresh out of college in transition into an actual career...


    I agree, some men here need a lesson in standards. I would never date a guy without a education or career because they are just low life bottom of the barrel leeches.


    how can you even call someone that?
    you cunt
  • Import

    Posts: 7190

    Jun 03, 2012 3:43 AM GMT
    vegemike said
    dontknowwhy said
    Import saiddude, honestly....not to sound snobby or like a bitch or anything, but why would u wanna date a lowly bartender? I mean, do u see long-term security and comfort in that field?

    is this man educated? Is he worth dating? Is he good enough for you?

    I feel like bartending jobs are for like college kids or people fresh out of college in transition into an actual career...


    I agree, some men here need a lesson in standards. I would never date a guy without a education or career because they are just low life bottom of the barrel leeches.


    how can you even call someone that?
    you cunt


    get over it, betch Photobucket
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    Jun 03, 2012 3:45 AM GMT
    vegemike said
    dontknowwhy said
    Import saiddude, honestly....not to sound snobby or like a bitch or anything, but why would u wanna date a lowly bartender? I mean, do u see long-term security and comfort in that field?

    is this man educated? Is he worth dating? Is he good enough for you?

    I feel like bartending jobs are for like college kids or people fresh out of college in transition into an actual career...


    I agree, some men here need a lesson in standards. I would never date a guy without a education or career because they are just low life bottom of the barrel leeches.


    how can you even call someone that?
    you cunt

    +1
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    Jun 03, 2012 3:50 AM GMT
    vegemike said
    dontknowwhy said
    Import saiddude, honestly....not to sound snobby or like a bitch or anything, but why would u wanna date a lowly bartender? I mean, do u see long-term security and comfort in that field?

    is this man educated? Is he worth dating? Is he good enough for you?

    I feel like bartending jobs are for like college kids or people fresh out of college in transition into an actual career...


    I agree, some men here need a lesson in standards. I would never date a guy without a education or career because they are just low life bottom of the barrel leeches.


    how can you even call someone that?
    you cunt


    you mad? Watch all the underachievers and loafters of RJ attack me smh
  • Import

    Posts: 7190

    Jun 03, 2012 3:55 AM GMT
    dontknowwhy said
    vegemike said
    dontknowwhy said
    Import saiddude, honestly....not to sound snobby or like a bitch or anything, but why would u wanna date a lowly bartender? I mean, do u see long-term security and comfort in that field?

    is this man educated? Is he worth dating? Is he good enough for you?

    I feel like bartending jobs are for like college kids or people fresh out of college in transition into an actual career...


    I agree, some men here need a lesson in standards. I would never date a guy without a education or career because they are just low life bottom of the barrel leeches.


    how can you even call someone that?
    you cunt


    you mad? Watch all the underachievers and loafters of RJ attack me smh


    lmao they're mad because they know they won't ever amount to anything but a trained monkey who mixes drinks and gives it to people working for 2 and 3 dollar tips.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 03, 2012 3:59 AM GMT
    Import said
    dontknowwhy said
    vegemike said
    dontknowwhy said
    Import saiddude, honestly....not to sound snobby or like a bitch or anything, but why would u wanna date a lowly bartender? I mean, do u see long-term security and comfort in that field?

    is this man educated? Is he worth dating? Is he good enough for you?

    I feel like bartending jobs are for like college kids or people fresh out of college in transition into an actual career...


    I agree, some men here need a lesson in standards. I would never date a guy without a education or career because they are just low life bottom of the barrel leeches.


    how can you even call someone that?
    you cunt


    you mad? Watch all the underachievers and loafters of RJ attack me smh


    lmao they're mad because they know they won't ever amount to anything but a trained monkey who mixes drinks and gives it to people working for 2 and 3 dollar tips.


    I know rite? Its so precious seeing bartenders act like they are hot shit.