Two Nice Gay Men Run out of Their Neighborhood

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jun 08, 2012 3:28 AM GMT
    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/stan-duncan/my-mothers-friends_b_1572250.html?ref=religion

    Important clip from the link:

    I live in Massachusetts and she lived in Oklahoma, and when she grew frail, I could seldom get home to help her. I felt awful about that, but she did have some wonderful friends who looked after her, including two old gay guys who lived across the street and who mowed her lawn, cleaned her gutters, and stopped in now and then to see how she was doing. They were -- as she put it -- "rescuing the old 'widder lady' in distress."

    When she finally passed away, I spent a day walking the street telling her neighbors what had happened and saying good bye to old friends. When I came to the home of the two men across from her, no one was there and the insides looked empty, so I moved on to the next house where I saw a man whose daughter I had dated as a teen. I asked him what had happened to the guys next door and he said, "Well, that's an interesting story." Evidently new families had moved into the neighborhood who didn't know the two men and who were not like the older crowd, and they were upset that everyone had allowed "queers" to live so close by. Young parents, inspired by teachings of TV preachers and a nearby mega-church, were worried that these old men might become a danger to their children. They began organizing and talking to friends, and finally after several bitter encounters, the two moved away. I asked the neighbor if they had ever actually done anything wrong and he said no. Actually, he said, "they were pretty good fellas." But "they were queer and all, and they say that's bad, so I guess it is."
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jun 08, 2012 9:40 AM GMT
    I have not been around much lately... but I suspect that this is heading for a pointless argument. That article is written by a pastor who spent a day back in the neighbourhood and talked to one set of neighbours. From that, one possible explanation and one story came out. So now I am supposed to be outraged based on a third hand story from a neighbour who likely did not know the motivations of a gay couple moving? Being as your quote has this person saying that he supposes that being gay is bad I would not think that the men confided their hopes, fears, and reasons for moving in this person who admits to not liking them based on their orientation.

    You pull out the story of the mega church influencing people to hate gays and forcing them to move rather than the pastor talking about his (and his churches) acceptance of gays and lesbians. You pull out the story that is not the real point of the article rather than I've been encouraged by the words of a Baptist preacher friend from Dallas who once told me that when he dies and stands before St. Peter at the pearly gates, and he hears a list of his lifetime's sins, he expects to hear a long list. But when all is said and done, he said he would much rather be judged for being too open minded than too closed. "If I'm going to make a mistake," he said, "I suspect God would rather it be a mistake of loving too many people into the kingdom than too few."

    Instead of After rancorous study and debates, the majority finally concluded that no matter how much one might argue the differentness of gays from straight people, they couldn't quite be convinced of the wrongness of it. How could God create human beings and then tell them not to love one another? and affirmations of the acceptance of (some) religions and denominations you chose to quote Actually, he said, "they were pretty good fellas." But "they were queer and all, and they say that's bad, so I guess it is."

    Do not get me wrong- if the story is true (and the motives of the men moving really were new, intolerant neighbours, that part of the story is horrid. Also, it is sad that there had to be rancorous study and debates before any acceptance. However, I think that you missed the main point which is that this pastor is writing of love and acceptance for all based on the message that he finds in the bible.

    I suppose we all have varying interpretations of these articles and various points and stories catch our eyes differently. I am not saying that you are wrong, just that I believe that the article was not really to tell the story of these men who moved (or else the author would have, presumably, tracked them down for an interview.)
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Jun 08, 2012 11:59 AM GMT
    Thats a pathetic story, how very sad indeed... and while that might have happened in Oklahoma, it probably could have been in any state.

    While disturbing, I can believe it. I have a great neighborhood myself (I actually serve as HOA president). My neighbors (albeit they may or may not really "know" about me) aren't a problem at all..... you get one of those "evangelical" crusaders on the block and things could change. Very unfortunate.

    icon_evil.gif
  • Buddha

    Posts: 1767

    Jun 08, 2012 12:56 PM GMT
    As it should be. Who do those fags think they are, helping their neighbour mowing their lawns and supporting people when they need it the most.
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Jun 08, 2012 1:06 PM GMT
    JPtheBITCH said
    west77 saidI suppose we all have varying interpretations of these articles and various points and stories catch our eyes differently. I am not saying that you are wrong, just that I believe that the article was not really to tell the story of these men who moved (or else the author would have, presumably, tracked them down for an interview.)

    You don't know Oklahoma.
    A straight couple. friends of mine, moved there years ago when his job transferred him.

    Barbara was unpacking the house shortly after the move when a neighbor stopped by with a pie, welcoming her to the neighborhood. After some chit-chat, the local lady asked Barbara "Have you decided where your church home will be?"

    Barbara explained that she and her husband were not religious people. The lady's smile froze on her face, and after a decent interval she left. And no one in the neighborhood talked to them again. Eventually he was transferred back to Virginia. She told me it was the worst two years of her life.


    Very sad story. What city in Oklahoma did they move, Jeff? Some small town?
    When was that?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jun 08, 2012 1:25 PM GMT
    west77 saidI have not been around much lately... but I suspect that this is heading for a pointless argument. That article is written by a pastor who spent a day back in the neighbourhood and talked to one set of neighbours. From that, one possible explanation and one story came out. So now I am supposed to be outraged based on a third hand story from a neighbour who likely did not know the motivations of a gay couple moving? Being as your quote has this person saying that he supposes that being gay is bad I would not think that the men confided their hopes, fears, and reasons for moving in this person who admits to not liking them based on their orientation.

    You pull out the story of the mega church influencing people to hate gays and forcing them to move rather than the pastor talking about his (and his churches) acceptance of gays and lesbians. You pull out the story that is not the real point of the article rather than I've been encouraged by the words of a Baptist preacher friend from Dallas who once told me that when he dies and stands before St. Peter at the pearly gates, and he hears a list of his lifetime's sins, he expects to hear a long list. But when all is said and done, he said he would much rather be judged for being too open minded than too closed. "If I'm going to make a mistake," he said, "I suspect God would rather it be a mistake of loving too many people into the kingdom than too few."

    Instead of After rancorous study and debates, the majority finally concluded that no matter how much one might argue the differentness of gays from straight people, they couldn't quite be convinced of the wrongness of it. How could God create human beings and then tell them not to love one another? and affirmations of the acceptance of (some) religions and denominations you chose to quote Actually, he said, "they were pretty good fellas." But "they were queer and all, and they say that's bad, so I guess it is."

    Do not get me wrong- if the story is true (and the motives of the men moving really were new, intolerant neighbours, that part of the story is horrid. Also, it is sad that there had to be rancorous study and debates before any acceptance. However, I think that you missed the main point which is that this pastor is writing of love and acceptance for all based on the message that he finds in the bible.

    I suppose we all have varying interpretations of these articles and various points and stories catch our eyes differently. I am not saying that you are wrong, just that I believe that the article was not really to tell the story of these men who moved (or else the author would have, presumably, tracked them down for an interview.)
    Thank you. You 'got it'.............
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jun 08, 2012 2:55 PM GMT
    JPtheBITCH saidAfter some chit-chat, the local lady asked Barbara "Have you decided where your church home will be?"


    OMG, it's been so long since I've lived in the bible belt (Dallas), I'd forgotten about that. At least her next question was not, "Have you been saved?", which I got with disturbing frequency when I was a teenager. The weird thing was that my family was super christian - just not the "right" kind as mainstream Presbyterians. The holy rollers were always trying to get me to go fundie.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jun 09, 2012 3:40 AM GMT
    west77: That article is written by a pastor who spent a day back in the neighborhood and talked to one set of neighbors. From that, one possible explanation and one story came out. So now I am supposed to be outraged based on a third hand story from a neighbor who likely did not know the motivations of a gay couple moving?

    StephenOABC: He was aware of the organized efforts against the gay couple. He was aware of the bitter encounters.

    west77: Being as your quote has this person saying that he supposes that being gay is bad I would not think that the men confided their hopes, fears, and reasons for moving in this person who admits to not liking them based on their orientation.

    StephenOABC: The neighbor who relayed the story to the pastor was not the strong force against the gay couple.

    The neighbor relaying the story said, "they said [being gay and all] is bad, so I guess it is." They refers to the new people who moved in and organized an effort. This means he doubted the goodness of this gay couple not while they were good neighbors to the pastor's mother but after. Before the new people moved in and affected his opinion, the gay couple probably thought there was some neighborly trust with this man. I cannot agree with you that the gay couple would not confide with another neighbor who knew them longer than the new people who came in.

    west 77: You pull out the story of the mega church influencing people to hate gays and forcing them to move rather than the pastor talking about his (and his church's) acceptance of gays and lesbians.

    StephenOABC: Yes, I am sympathizing with that part of the whole article. I think it is horrible to have to be uprooted for the reasons the gay couple was uprooted.Second, I have an elderly parent who may not make it to Thanksgiving. I was identifying with the pastor because I recently spoke with one of my parents' neighbors. That's where the similarity ends, but, it was enough to draw me.

    The introductory paragraph of the article tells of encouraging and discouraging news for the GLBT community.

    Cutting this short: I read the whole article. I know what's in the article.

    As one of my parents leaves the family, I'm thinking about my own prospects. Will my efforts at goodness be met with strong opposition? Is it a crime and a sin to treat good neighbors the way the gay couple was treated. Yes, it is.