Older guys, what do you wish you had known/done when you were younger?

  • Tyinstl

    Posts: 353

    Jun 09, 2012 7:13 PM GMT
    Share your wisdom with us younger guys. Tell us about a mistake you've made, and what you learned from it. Try to be specific, and avoid platitudes like "live life to the fullest". We'd like to be able to use what you tell us.
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    Jun 09, 2012 7:27 PM GMT
    OMG.. where to start......................
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    Jun 09, 2012 7:28 PM GMT
    Resist peer pressure at ALL costs. To include family!
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    Jun 09, 2012 7:28 PM GMT
    I wish I had gotten an exorcism when I was like...14.
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    Jun 09, 2012 8:12 PM GMT
    Don't worry what others think. Don't hang around with overly judgemental people. Floss at least once a day. Put more money into a retirement account.
  • rdberg1957

    Posts: 662

    Jun 09, 2012 8:23 PM GMT
    When I was younger, all I had to do was show up and I would end up with someone. In my 20's, I was quite handsome, but I didn't know much about love and relationships. Now I'm 55 and I know so much more about how to be a good partner, but there aren't as many guys close to my age who are out and about who respond to me.
  • calibro

    Posts: 8888

    Jun 09, 2012 8:29 PM GMT
    i wish i were a sluttier fourth grader
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    Jun 09, 2012 8:31 PM GMT
    I wish I would have came out earlier
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    Jun 09, 2012 9:10 PM GMT
    I wish I had been in Calibro's 4th grade!
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    Jun 09, 2012 9:15 PM GMT
    It's easy to look back and think about what you wish you had done but the reality is that you learned lessons based upon what you did do and having not done those would only lead to lessons lost.

    I often use the example that if I had come out when I was in my 20s, like I sometimes wish I had known enough to do so I could have experienced the gay culture in my youth, I probably wouldn't be here typing because a good many of my age died in SF during the aids epidemic.

    Do the best to be a good person to everyone, use common sense, save for a rainy day (get your 401K started!) and know that no matter what path you choose and decisions you make, there are always lessons to learn that otherwise would themselves be lost opportunities.
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    Jun 09, 2012 9:18 PM GMT
    I wish I had figured out what my attraction to guys meant and actually DONE something about it. Wasted a hell of a lot of time chasing pussy that I didn't even want...ew!
  • masculumpedes

    Posts: 5549

    Jun 09, 2012 9:19 PM GMT
    Work a little less and enjoy life a little more....icon_wink.gif
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    Jun 09, 2012 9:20 PM GMT
    Ummm.....I could write a short novel on this subject! But I guess the main thing I would do differently is spend more time with my mom and let people know how much I love them before it's too late. icon_cry.gif
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    Jun 09, 2012 9:25 PM GMT
    It all works out perfectly. What seems like a huge mistake will become an opportunity. Little events turn out having big significance and big events aren't even remembered. Be ever present in the now. Worrying about the future or lamenting about the past add no value to your life.
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    Jun 09, 2012 9:26 PM GMT
    More time in the gym icon_neutral.gif



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    Jun 09, 2012 9:28 PM GMT
    [quote][cite]Alpha13 said[/cite]It all works out perfectly. What seems like a huge mistake will become an opportunity. Little events turn out having big significance and big events aren't even remembered. Be ever present in the now. Worrying about the future or lamenting about the past add no value to your life. [/quote



    Agree what he said
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    Jun 09, 2012 9:28 PM GMT
    You will have days when the shit hits the fan, many of them, these days will pass, life has its ups and downs, dont dwell on these days, its easy to become bitter and cynical as you age.

    Dont be too quick to judge that senior citizen near you smiling your way. You probably just remind them of themselves when they were young, or someone they loved.

    As much as things change, most of what you are going through has been gone through before. Things were different when they were younger, the same will be said when you are old and grey.
    Cause we all get older and times do change and so do attitudes,
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    Jun 09, 2012 9:34 PM GMT
    'Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option.'
    - Mark Twain.


    NO JOKE. Sadly I've learned this more than once. icon_confused.gif
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    Jun 09, 2012 11:03 PM GMT
    I'd have been a lot harder on a few of the people in my life - people who I was very good to - very generous with - and I got little in return, if anything. I finally got rid of such people but I should never have given them the time of day in the first place. So - - choose wisely the people you spend your time with. Get rid of people who don't bring you happiness.

    On the other hand - I have no regrets or advice. Have a good time and study / work hard. Get over shyness as soon as you can. Smile and have fun.
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    Jun 10, 2012 3:21 AM GMT
    1. Remember that the vast majority of your life is still ahead of you. Be careful not to do something now that will impair that majority of your life. This applies to anything from dangerous sports to unsafe sex.

    2. As you get older, other people's opinion matters to you less and less. That's because you have more and more years experiencing that other people's opinion of you doesn't change a thing about your life.

    3. It's really easy to take a good thing for granted. And to lose it (him/her) for good. If you are happy and you know it, pat his back.
  • TonyToneTC

    Posts: 109

    Jun 10, 2012 3:35 AM GMT
    I should have listened to my grandfather’s stories a lot more, before he died. The Diné Creation Story, the songs, the prayers, old magic and chants. It’s my only regret in life to this day icon_sad.gificon_cry.gif
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    Jun 10, 2012 4:06 AM GMT
    I wish I'd focused more on my passions, desires and bettering myself when I was in high school.
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    Jun 10, 2012 4:12 AM GMT
    Nothing b/c I am perfect.
  • brickboy1966

    Posts: 359

    Jun 10, 2012 4:15 AM GMT
    Come out earlier and had a lot of sex.
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    Jun 10, 2012 4:39 AM GMT
    Tyinstl saidShare your wisdom with us younger guys. Tell us about a mistake you've made, and what you learned from it. Try to be specific, and avoid platitudes like "live life to the fullest". We'd like to be able to use what you tell us.


    Good advise here, all of it.

    Education, paramount to any future you can never have enough, that 401K won't feed itself. Party sparingly, it kills brain cells and causes wrinkles. Make a plan, nobody ever achieved greatness without one. Choose your friends carefully, there is no shortage of people who want company whilst sitting in the mud, identify and eliminate them without prejudice. Always leave loved ones with loving words. Be active in charity, it keeps you grounded and helps remind you that goodness is not a soundbite but something that feeds the soul. Don't look too hard at the past, your not going there. Be dedicated, it carry's it's own rewards. Be brave, put yourself out there, far less recriminations. Be honorable, do what you say you will do without exception, it breeds respect. Be ambitious, set your goals high and settle for nothing less. Don't take yourself too seriously, if you can't laugh at yourself from time to time you are a moving target. Make time for you, an hour a day stay fit will pay off in ways you can't imagine later in life. Travel, see the world now while your young, stay single for this part - it adds to the adventure. Don't worry about finding "Mr. Right", it will happen when it's supposed to happen. When "Mr. Right" does finally come along, be smart enough to stop while your ahead. If you have the desire to be a parent I highly recommend it, but be aware you will forever have a piece of your heart wandering outside your body. Trust is not fairy dust, be careful how you use it, and who you give it to. Lies are the pavement to an ugly finish. Truth is always best. The fencepost between the two is dangerous and has cost many men their balls. Never drive drunk. Never RIDE with someone who is drunk. Assume nothing.

    As you go along through life, it's nice to have nice things - to live well, and be surrounded by people you love that love you back. In the end, the only thing you'll carry forward. The rest is simply props and set decoration. Try and keep that in focus.

    Thus ends my Yoda moment for today.