True or false: all very feminine guys are gay

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    Jul 29, 2008 1:01 AM GMT
    This is something that I wonder about. Opinions?
  • ShawnTX

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    Jul 29, 2008 1:15 AM GMT
    False
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    Jul 29, 2008 1:25 AM GMT
    I have to say false, to me that's the same as saying all masculine guys are hetero, and well there are plenty of men here who prove that wrong. Who we are and how we act is one thing, who we are attracted to is another.
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    Jul 29, 2008 1:34 AM GMT
    false
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    Jul 29, 2008 1:37 AM GMT
    This is a HUGE false! I've made the mistake of thinking like that in the past but have learned thats just not the case. I worked briefly with a guy that they could have molded the character Jack from Will and Grace after. I was floored when he introduced us all to his wife and two daughters. There wasn't a jaw in the office that wasn't on the floor. There would have been no need for him to hide in the closet if that were the case. He was a walking circus with all the bells and whistles. He just happened to be a feminine straight guy.

  • Hunter9

    Posts: 1039

    Jul 29, 2008 1:43 AM GMT
    false... but its not common
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    Jul 29, 2008 1:56 AM GMT
    False. One of my college teachers is effeminate, but is married, has a baby boy, and still flirt a lot with girls. LOL

    Another is older, who I'm not so sure of, is a college dean and father of one of my friends. I think he may be gay who was forced into marriage because of how we used to view gays here. He's really flamboyant now that he's older, and my friend acts kinda ashamed around him. icon_confused.gif

    Another was a college classmate, he was overweight, cheerful, had almost NO masculine interestes, and VERY effeminate. We always thought he was gay and treated him like one (which was somewhere between how we treat girls and nerdy guys). He surprised us one day by admitting that he had a crush on a girl, the guys were all shocked and told him that we always thought he was gay. He laughed and said that he gets that a lot, but he really wasn't, even if he did act like one.

    And yeah, I believe he was telling the truth.
  • Hunter9

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    Jul 29, 2008 1:59 AM GMT
    Just because they are married or flirt/sleep with girls, does not mean they are not gay
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    Jul 29, 2008 2:06 AM GMT
    Hunter9 saidJust because they are married or flirt/sleep with girls, does not mean they are not gay


    True. Still, I've never seen the latter two guys on my post give a man anything more than a cursory glance. But then again, my gaydar is waaay broken. icon_razz.gif
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    Jul 29, 2008 2:16 AM GMT
    I have a hard time believing it but I suppose it's true. There is a guy I've known for about two years. He is so over the top flamboyant that he makes Carson Kressley look like Bruce Willis. It wasn't until about six months ago that I learned he's been married for over 20 years and has five kids.

    Not that that makes a man straight necessarily, but when I expressed my amusement about this to some female friends who work with him, each of them said he was actually notorious about flirting with the girls he works with. Who knew?? icon_eek.gif

    (On Edit: Let me clarify my opening sentence. I mean to say it's true what many posters have already said, that not all feminine guys are gay.)
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    Jul 29, 2008 2:18 AM GMT

    False.

    We know two guys reeellly well that put Albert from 'The Birdcage' to shame.

    They are straight straight straight. One just got married to his girlfriend of 10 years.

    I was out one night with one of them and he got hit on by a waiter. As we were leaving, the waiter passed my friend his phone#, and my buddy stood back, slapped a hand on one hip, flailed the other arm for dramatic effect and said,
    "I thought you guys liked 'em butch!"

    I completely lost it. icon_lol.gif


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    Jul 29, 2008 2:21 AM GMT
    OK guys, I'm getting the picture
  • ep83

    Posts: 144

    Jul 29, 2008 2:31 AM GMT
    False.

    Think of gay-straight and masculine-feminine as the X and Y axes of a graph. Where someone is on one of them is completely unrelated to where he or she is on the other.
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    Jul 29, 2008 2:49 AM GMT
    False. But I think few men (gay or straight) are "masc" all the time, or feminine all the time. Gender is a constant performance, so we all have moments that aren't consistent with our overall manner.

    Sometimes I wonder if when people meet a "masc chill" gay guy, they aren't waiting for the moment when he will be caught off guard and squeal or gesture with his hands too much and reveal his inward disposition.

    Likewise, I've known completely straight guys who provoked some speculation because of their slightly feminine manner. When they did things like get girlfriends and get married, people just said, "Well, he's just sensitive." And suddenly they didn't seem that effeminate anymore.

    In other words--perhaps I'm a bit paranoid, but I think it is at least possible that people might interpret your behavior a little differently if they know in advance that you're gay.
  • Bunjamon

    Posts: 3161

    Jul 29, 2008 3:45 AM GMT
    theycallmeRED said to me that's the same as saying all masculine guys are hetero, and well there are plenty of men here who prove that wrong. Who we are and how we act is one thing, who we are attracted to is another.


    Exactly.
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    Jul 29, 2008 4:38 AM GMT
    True. If it walks like a duck...

    It's just a matter of time before they take a wide stance in a public toilet or suddenly discover themselves.
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    Jul 29, 2008 7:55 AM GMT
    False, cuz i know a VERY feminine guy who has been in a relationship with a girl for the past 3 years!

    Thats either love or a really good cover-up! haha
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    Jul 29, 2008 8:33 AM GMT
    Remember Dana Carvey's character on SNL:

    http://snltranscripts.jt.org/91/91plyle.phtml
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    Jul 29, 2008 11:02 AM GMT
    False. There's such a thing as metrosexuals.

    And of course the eternal debate: gay or european.

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    Jul 29, 2008 11:17 AM GMT
    Definitely false. Some guys just have some effeminate qualities.
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    Jul 29, 2008 11:18 AM GMT
    True and False
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    Jul 29, 2008 1:08 PM GMT
    False, false, false. Many masculine guys are gay, many masculine women are straight, etc..
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    Jul 29, 2008 1:18 PM GMT
    False

    Case in point:
    Just last night, the Sundance Channel did a story on Male "Prostitutes" (Hosts) in China
    All of the guys were pretty boys, plucked, waxed, straight-ironed hair, eye-liner, eyebrow penciled, highlights and thin/waifish.
    The epitome of effeminate looking, but they ONLY cater to women and entertaining women on dates and sexually...

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    Jul 29, 2008 2:34 PM GMT
    not true... my dad is kinda fem and a lot of people use to think he was gay but he's far from it.

    I also had a gym teacher when I was younger and he was fem to some degree... he was also hot but that's a whole other story (I had plenty of role play stories in my head that use to get me going lol) but he had a hot wife... so I guess it doesn't matter.

    cal
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    Jul 29, 2008 2:38 PM GMT
    Definitely False.

    One of the most effeminate guys I know is married for 30 years with six kids, and a huge flirt with the ladies.

    Some of the most 'masculine' guys I know are queer as a three dollar bill.