Seeing ur ex- happy with a new BF.

  • Frankie72

    Posts: 2

    Jun 22, 2012 9:57 PM GMT
    I finally ran into my ex after 2 yrs- we broke up because I guess he wasn't happy with me- and wanted his freedom- I did everything for him and still wasn't enough- anyways ran into him the other day we chatted and it turns out he is with another guy, in fact there already living together- I'm happy for him- but why do I feel annoyed about it- when I saw him I didn't have or shall I say feel anything for him anymore- but I don't understand why I feel so - dunno used by him....
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    Jun 22, 2012 9:59 PM GMT
    Ummm try to put it behind you. There are bigger and better things ahead if you work for them.
  • Frankie72

    Posts: 2

    Jun 22, 2012 10:00 PM GMT
    Yeah bud- tried but all well-
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    Jun 22, 2012 10:05 PM GMT
    People can change a lot in 1 year. Maybe you're annoyed that he didn't change in time for your relationship. Maybe you feel like the new guy has something you don't. Maybe you want someone else.

    Just sing some Adele and you'll get through it.
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    Jun 22, 2012 10:52 PM GMT
    SkinnyBitch said
    Just sing some Adele and you'll get through it.


    lol

    If I saw my ex with a new boyfriend, then good for him. I have better use of my energy than being frustrated about anything dealing with him :p
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    Jun 22, 2012 11:20 PM GMT
    vla8 saidlol

    If I saw my ex with a new boyfriend, then good for him. I have better use of my energy than being frustrated about anything dealing with him :p
    QFT*
  • Webster666

    Posts: 9217

    Jun 22, 2012 11:30 PM GMT
    For whatever reason, it didn't work out. That's all.

    And, sometimes, regardless of how much you give to a relationship, it still doesn't work out.

    MOST relationships don't work out.

    Shrug.

    Put out the "You-R-Next" sign, and start test driving some other candidates.
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    Jun 22, 2012 11:50 PM GMT
    I wanted my ex to find someone else so badly, and let go of me, that I was escorting him to gay clubs and other places to help him find a guy for himself! LOL!

    I would have considered it mission accomplished if I had seen him with a new BF, but I never did. And he still phones me for advice, we're in different States now, since he's still single, still having trouble keeping or being satisfied with a guy.

    No, if I felt uneasy about seeing an ex with a new BF I'd wonder if I regretted our no longer being together, or if I was jealous of him. Jealous maybe because of the new guy he had, wishing I'd found him first, and/or because I didn't have anyone myself just then.
  • Import

    Posts: 7185

    Jun 22, 2012 11:53 PM GMT
    I would honestly hate that my ex was happy with a new man.

    I'd want my ex to be miserable. Just because living a life without me in it is a sad existance indeed.

    I'd wanna be the one with the hotter, newer, cooler, richer, bf
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    Jun 22, 2012 11:57 PM GMT
    I don't know...currently I am the new BF so I'll have to ask his ex.
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    Jun 23, 2012 12:13 AM GMT
    I would leave him be, cause if I was in his situation, I personally wouldn't want old news in my airwaves, adding static to my love station.
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    Jun 23, 2012 3:53 AM GMT
    ....maybe try stealing his bf for a night. U would feel different
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    Jun 23, 2012 4:34 AM GMT
    Speaking from experince my days chasing women. In due time u will get over it. You wont even think twice about it.
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    Jun 23, 2012 4:53 AM GMT
    ...............And remember:

    Please don't talk about me when I'm gone,
    Oh honey, though our friendship ceases from now on,
    And listen - if you can't say anything real nice,
    it's better not to talk at all is my advice.

    We're parting, you go your way - I'll go mine,
    It's best that we do,
    Here's a kiss - I hope that this brings lots of love to you,
    Makes no difference how I carry on,
    Remember please don't talk about me when I'm gone!


    This little song helps me get past any thoughts of an ex. In truth, most of my exes were great guys and we had some good times...........but things change or we grew apart. I'd want most every one of them to have fun and meet someone worthy of them.........(so long as he is only half as fine as I was.)
  • maxferguson

    Posts: 321

    Jun 23, 2012 5:10 AM GMT
    My philosophy: things have to end pretty bad to lose a friend in a relationship. They would have to do something that showed me they were not at all the kind of person I thought they were; cheating would be a good example, so would not being willing to admit they might be wrong, etc...

    Other than that, if things didn't turn out happily ever after, that's okay. Unless both of you are attracted to each other emotionally, physically and on any other level, then it's hard to grow together and make each other better people. If they found someone who could do that for them, I could only be happy for both of them -- he's not a bad person and deserves to find that someone and so do you.

    I'm friends with my ex and we both know that we're not the right match for a great, long lived romantic relationship. But we do know that we'd be happy for each other when the guy who was just right came along, and that has created a sense of trust and a safe, honest source of advice.

    As for moving in that quickly, there are no rules. My Dad and my Mum were engaged after 3 weeks. They were together for 30 years before Mum passed, but the chemistry was just right and they would have kept going. She always joked that "marrying her was the easiest fuckin' decision he's every made. He spent more time picking his outfit this morning." hahaha, so don't worry, anything can happen at any time -- whatever you do, be happy for him. His search is as hard as yours and as any ones, so worst case scenario he drifts away....best case, you have a good friend you can go to.