How far would you go?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 31, 2008 7:04 PM GMT
    Hey studs, just wanted to get your opinion on distance dating. Two part question: How far would you guys drive for a date with a guy that you're interested in? Have you had any experiences with dating long-distance? Give me the good, the bad, and the ugly. ;)

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 31, 2008 7:24 PM GMT
    lol, well some guys think over 20 miles is long distance dating. icon_eek.gif

    I would def consider it, though I think in the long run, if the distance is over say 60 miles - at some point one or the other is going to feel that responsibility gets in the way of spending time together... Or at that point, maybe it's time to cohabitate and meet half way, then it's only a 30 mile commute for each back to responsibility land! icon_biggrin.gif

    In my opion, if you're living "hours" apart, the door just stays open for a "local" to move in.

    But good luck. If you think it's it worth it, it worth the effort. icon_wink.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 31, 2008 9:44 PM GMT
    How about Inter-continental distances...

    My partner and I dated all over Europe and the Middle East when I first met him because he was still in the (Brit) Army and we had to date around his leaves for a couple years...

    Sitges, Naxos, Paris, Cyprus, London, Dubai, Goa, Masqat, Cairo, Bayram...

  • Musclebucket

    Posts: 157

    Jul 31, 2008 9:49 PM GMT
    My basic rule has been never to drive more than 60 miles each way for sex.

    now, with higher gas prices, I'm thinking of lowering it to 30 miles
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 31, 2008 10:00 PM GMT
    It depends on where you live. Here in NYC, where there are thousands of eligible men, people tend to be spoiled. Why look miles and miles away? A quick subway or taxi ride is just about the maximum distance....better yet....a 5 minute walk.

    But if the guy is decent, hot and regularly sends a plane ticket.......I would travel to another continent....(which, btw, I just did). LOL
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 31, 2008 10:07 PM GMT
    LD's do not work! They're LAME! Who's to say you're not and he's not doing what he/you want when/how you/he wants!!!

    First dates; depends on how it went and if you're totally IN to the guy or just in COMPLETE lust!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 31, 2008 10:20 PM GMT
    I've been in a serious long distance relationship before, and there are a lot of things I learned from it.

    First off.. if you're within a moderate drive of each other, you can make it work. There are drawbacks to living an hour or two away, but if it's something you feel very strongly about pursuing, then it can be worth it.
    Second off.. regardless, there are a lot of pluses to dating/having a relationship with someone who lives close to you, that you don't get in a long distance relationship. I for one, would rather have a close-distance relationship. The only time it's ever worth it for me to pursue a long distance thing, is if he's the end all be all.. and I'm absolutely, pathetically in love. icon_razz.gif

    To answer your question plainly.. I'd drive 30 minutes or so to go on a first date. I think that's reasonable. I'd go for an hours drive if I thought he might be worth it for some reason.
  • Brinker

    Posts: 20

    Jul 31, 2008 10:22 PM GMT
    LDR's work only if there is a possibility that you can live together some day. I've had three of them. I'm in Seattle.

    The first was in Michigan. We managed to make it work for two years 92-94. We thought because of the distance we shouldn't be exclusive, but in hindsight that is what killed the relationship. He did eventually move here anyway.

    The second was in Tampa, the opposite corner. After a brief meeting in Atlanta and a year of talking online, he moved here and we made it work for two more years. We were monogamous but sexually incompatible.

    Still good friends with both of the above.

    My current was living in Southern California in 2001. At the time I said I would never do another LDR, but he persevered and the following year he moved in. We are very compatible and quite happy, and are planning the rest of our lives together.

    So it does work with the right person if your aims are the same. Give it time to test out, and your chances are as good. When the magic happens you have to follow through and not let the 'what ifs' scare you off. Distance is only one of several overcomable obstacles in finding a good partner.
  • GQjock

    Posts: 11649

    Jul 31, 2008 10:23 PM GMT
    Long distance dating is basically
    all in one's mind

    You see a guy for maybe a weekend a month?
    and You think you got a BF for the rest of that time?

    icon_neutral.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 31, 2008 10:27 PM GMT
    I'd drive an hour to meet a guy on a first date. But he'd better pay for dinner at a nice restaurant. (BTW, they always have icon_smile.gif.)
  • Csrobbie2000

    Posts: 359

    Jul 31, 2008 10:42 PM GMT
    I was in a long distance relationship for 1.5 years with someone who lives in Vancover, and I had to end it last year. I thought I would give long distance relationship another try (actually with a RealJock member here), and it ended a few weeks ago. So I guess long distance relationship is difficult and not for me. It's one thing if you guys have been together for years, and one has to move away. Other than that, it's tough. Best wishes though!!!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 01, 2008 2:10 AM GMT
    One of my friends dated someone in Texas. (we are in SC.) It lasted for a bout 3 years, which is pretty good. She was going to move in with him and they were going to go to a local tech college down here. But he realized that if they broke up or something happened, she would be stranded down here with no money or anything. (Her family was in SEVERE financial problems.)

    I'm scared to try it.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 01, 2008 2:23 AM GMT
    No more than six blocks. Seven if he's really hot!
  • joggerva

    Posts: 731

    Aug 01, 2008 2:31 AM GMT
    RBY71 saidNo more than six blocks. Seven if he's really hot!


    That would be quite a distance to drag the body.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 01, 2008 2:36 AM GMT
    I don't care how hot he is, I refuse to leave earth orbit. Some people may call this provincial, but I draw the line at anything beyond the Exospheric layer.

    *absentmindedly fondles the ionic drive controls*

    *sighs*
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 01, 2008 2:44 AM GMT
    joggerva said
    RBY71 saidNo more than six blocks. Seven if he's really hot!


    That would be quite a distance to drag the body.


    I'll pick out a shiny new red wheelbarrow at Home Depot.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 01, 2008 2:45 AM GMT
    joggerva said
    RBY71 saidNo more than six blocks. Seven if he's really hot!


    That would be quite a distance to drag the body.


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  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 01, 2008 2:54 AM GMT
    The farthest I've gone for a date was from here (Baltimore) to NYC, to spend the weekend with a guy from Realjock.

    A few months later, I went to NYC again to spend another weekend with him. Both weekends were amazing!

    However, I've never been in a long distance relationship, so I have nothing to add there.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 01, 2008 3:04 AM GMT
    Sedative saidSEDATIVE INDUSTRIES
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  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 01, 2008 3:07 AM GMT
    My bf and I are two hours apart and have been dating for almost 4 years. He is planning to move here as soon as he can but I have to admit it takes a toll on you and the relationship.

    Its been so hard but we really love each other and are trying to make it work. I think it will be alot better once we are together.

    If I ever am in the single boat again though I wont ever date exclusively long distance again. Just to taxing emotionally for me.

    I think over an hour drive is to far in most cases.