Parenting as a gay couple...

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 26, 2012 4:18 AM GMT
    I'm not sure what everyone's opinion is on the matter, but how do you think a gay partnership or relation could affect the development of a child? I'm especially concerned because I want to have kids at some point in life. What about everyone else?
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    Jun 26, 2012 4:49 AM GMT
    I think consistent discipline and actually being involved in your child's life will have far more of an impact on their potential as good citizens than what genitalia happen to be hanging between their parent's legs.
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    Jun 26, 2012 5:01 AM GMT
    If straight parents only produced straight children, a lot of us wouldn't be here icon_eek.gif

    So why would you think gay parents produce gay children? If you want to be a great parent - then be caring, disciplined, involved, and accepting.
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    Jun 26, 2012 5:03 AM GMT
    How you ACT as parents and relate to each other as a parental couple matters... not WHO/WHAT you are.
  • wander2340

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    Jun 26, 2012 5:47 AM GMT
    Kids just want to feel safe and loved. Nothing else really matters. Seriously!
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    Jun 26, 2012 6:06 AM GMT
    thanks for all your posts, give me a lot to think about icon_biggrin.gif
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    Jun 26, 2012 6:09 AM GMT
    wander2340 saidKids just want to feel safe and loved. Nothing else really matters. Seriously!


    Yes and they can feel loved and safe, until they go to school, and find out not everyone has two dad's and the reaction they have to deal with when people find out they also have two dads who kiss; children are so curl, and we could never put a child thought that; thus they need more than just to feel safe and to be loved. Also our lives a complete and we don't need to breed to feel complete, or fill a hole in our lives, as neither feel somethings missing in our lives.
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    Jun 26, 2012 6:31 AM GMT
    tru_blu_auzzie said
    wander2340 saidKids just want to feel safe and loved. Nothing else really matters. Seriously!


    Yes and they can feel loved and safe, until they go to school, and find out not everyone has two dad's and the reaction they have to deal with when people find out they also have two dads who kiss; children are so curl, and we could never put a child thought that; thus they need more than just to feel safe and to be loved. Also our lives a complete and we don't need to breed to feel complete, or fill a hole in our lives, as neither feel somethings missing in our lives.

    Or you can fear monger as he does and think that we do not evolve as a society in any way, as if there has never been a single person who grew up by two moms or dads.
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    Jun 26, 2012 6:38 AM GMT
    I don't think that the fact that the child has same-sex parents affects the development of the child, but I do think that a child is affected a lot by the likely possibilty of getting mobbed(sorry not sure if that's even a word) in school etc. because of his gay parents.
    I'm not sure if I could deal with my child coming home from school sad or crying everyday because of me.
    I'd still love to have children someday though :/
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    Jun 26, 2012 6:44 AM GMT
    Justtrying saidI don't think that the fact that the child has same-sex parents affects the development of the child, but I do think that a child is affected a lot by the likely possibilty of getting mobbed(sorry not sure if that's even a word) in school etc. because of his gay parents.
    I'm not sure if I could deal with my child coming home from school sad or crying everyday because of me.
    I'd still love to have children someday though :/


    I suppose this might be an issue in areas characterized by extreme homophobia... But why would you want to live there in the first place?
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    Jun 26, 2012 7:42 AM GMT
    intensity69 said
    Justtrying saidI don't think that the fact that the child has same-sex parents affects the development of the child, but I do think that a child is affected a lot by the likely possibilty of getting mobbed(sorry not sure if that's even a word) in school etc. because of his gay parents.
    I'm not sure if I could deal with my child coming home from school sad or crying everyday because of me.
    I'd still love to have children someday though :/


    I suppose this might be an issue in areas characterized by extreme homophobia... But why would you want to live there in the first place?


    Well I'm not planning on staying here. I'm just saying you'll never know how kids react.
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    Jun 26, 2012 9:51 AM GMT
    uoft23 saidI think consistent discipline and actually being involved in your child's life will have far more of an impact on their potential as good citizens than what genitalia happen to be hanging between their parent's legs.


    Well said!!

    Bad parents abound across families, races, genders and sexualities.

    The same can also be said for good ones too!
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    Jun 26, 2012 10:30 AM GMT
    As long as one of the parents isn't named Pattison the child will be ok.
  • Kathleen1

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    Jun 26, 2012 2:23 PM GMT
    Thumbs UPwww.50centsloseweight.com
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    Jun 26, 2012 2:25 PM GMT
    As long as you are involved in your child's life that is all that matters.
    Being accepting, warming, but still being a parent which involves discipline and sometimes tough words will make you a great Dad.
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    Jun 26, 2012 2:46 PM GMT
    I suggest reading a sociology textbook regarding this, it states how the environment in which a child is surrounded in affects their development and personality
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    Jun 26, 2012 3:36 PM GMT
    msuNtx saidAs long as you are involved in your child's life that is all that matters.
    Being accepting, warming, but still being a parent which involves discipline and sometimes tough words will make you a great Dad.



    exactly
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    Jun 26, 2012 3:39 PM GMT
    tru_blu_auzzie said
    wander2340 saidKids just want to feel safe and loved. Nothing else really matters. Seriously!


    Yes and they can feel loved and safe, until they go to school, and find out not everyone has two dad's and the reaction they have to deal with when people find out they also have two dads who kiss; children are so curl, and we could never put a child thought that; thus they need more than just to feel safe and to be loved. Also our lives a complete and we don't need to breed to feel complete, or fill a hole in our lives, as neither feel somethings missing in our lives.


    I would like kids, but this sounds like good reality testing.
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    Jun 26, 2012 3:41 PM GMT
    Justtrying saidI don't think that the fact that the child has same-sex parents affects the development of the child, but I do think that a child is affected a lot by the likely possibilty of getting mobbed(sorry not sure if that's even a word) in school etc. because of his gay parents.
    I'm not sure if I could deal with my child coming home from school sad or crying everyday because of me.
    I'd still love to have children someday though :/


    Exactly
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    Jun 26, 2012 3:44 PM GMT
    Although intellectually I'm in favor of gay couples raising children, I'm ashamed to admit I have a negative emotional reaction when I see this. Nothing extreme....just "feels" a bit wrong. I'm sure it's just that I'm not used to seeing it, and new patterns can strike us as "wrong" at times. I'm hoping that the more I'm exposed to it, this feeling will eventually fade away. I guess I should just be thankful I'm smart enough that I can differentiate between my feelings and conscious thought. icon_confused.gif
  • wander2340

    Posts: 176

    Jun 26, 2012 4:10 PM GMT
    We live in a crazy right wing part of the country so you would think that our kids would probably experience discrimination at school. But, it has NEVER happened. I truly believe that the world gives back to you what you dish out. We are always kind and outgoing to everyone at the school and they are kind and outgoing with us in return. All the kids at school know about Asher and Allison's 2 dads and do you know what I hear most often from them..... "I wish you were my dad." We go to all the little kid birthday parties and have gotten to know many of the other parents at the school.

    If I were to complain about anything it would be that we fit so comfortably into this straight right wing conservative community that I end up missing out on all the crazy gay fun that most of you all get to experience.

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    Jun 26, 2012 5:01 PM GMT
    I suppose then, it is truly where you pick to raise your kids that makes the difference. Thanks everyone for your insightful advice, ad to those of you that offered a humorous reply.

    lol i have a lot to think about since I do want to have children, but lets face it at one point in our lives when the lights dim, and we begin to slow down, age catches on to us and at that point I want to be at peace knowing that I produced upright individuals which contribute to the community. + i want to be a granddad at some point. That must be fun! lol
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    Jun 26, 2012 5:06 PM GMT
    Dear god I hope some of you don't plan on passing on your genes.

    On the opposite end, some of you seem like you could make really good fathers.