Does the "In a Monogamous Relationship" status turn you off a profile?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 27, 2012 4:52 AM GMT
    Sometimes while looking through profiles I'm like ooo hot guy, I'm gonna leave a sexy, flirty comment! Then when I see he's a in a monogamous relationship and I'm like oh...forget it. It's not that the guy becomes less hot, it's that I have pretty much zero motivation to flirt with someone in a committed relationship, regardless of why he has a profile here, if it's an open relationship etc. I just don't feel like flirting even if I know it wouldn't have resulted into anything IRL had they been single. Anyone else?
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    Jun 27, 2012 4:55 AM GMT
    well, it's always nice to know one's limits and if the other one is already taken and in a committed relationship, it certainly is not right to even attempt to do something with that person. And yes, I do back off. It's a line I don't cross.
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    Jun 27, 2012 5:10 AM GMT
    If they are already in a committed relationship, why would I flirt with them? They probably aren't going to flirt back. I may say something to compliment them, but they are off limits as far as I'm concerned.
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    Jun 27, 2012 5:35 AM GMT
    My impulse for the thread was based on the process of " icon_biggrin.gif Oh wow this guy is so...oh icon_neutral.gif" " icon_biggrin.gif Oh this one is really...oh icon_neutral.gif"
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    Jun 27, 2012 5:35 AM GMT
    I do that a lot. Lots of guys are already taken. icon_neutral.gif
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    Jun 27, 2012 5:36 AM GMT
    I flirt with some of my monogamous friends, but only as a joke.

    I'm with you on not flirting with someone who's in a relationship.
  • Pontifex

    Posts: 1882

    Jun 27, 2012 7:04 AM GMT
    I don't see a problem with complimenting someone's body if they are showing it off but I wouldn't flirt with them.

    If it was just the fact that someone isn't available there would be very few comments made since we are all spread out geographically and even though something could happen between people on different continents it is unlikely.
  • DR2K

    Posts: 346

    Jun 27, 2012 7:05 AM GMT
    They're either married or gay.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 27, 2012 7:11 AM GMT
    Haha, I usually donĀ“t get out of my way to contact or flirt with a guy in a monogamous relationship unless he does it first.
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    Jun 27, 2012 9:10 AM GMT
    It is a lil dis-heartening
    but i feel happy that there are guys who believe in gay love & not just in gay fuck so i cheer up & be friends with them many of my RJ buddies are in relations & i have no qualms being a good friend ...m147.gif


    I hate Open relations & those polygamist fuck-ups

    m036.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 27, 2012 12:08 PM GMT
    I for one appreciate this!

    Earlier this week a guy on here kept emailing me notes like "We should get together" and "Invite me over" and "I am the answer to your bottom dreams" (ok, really? does that line actually work?). I just ignored them. Did you NOT read my profile? Some of us really are on here for the fitness tips (well, and the forum drama).

    That said, everyone likes picture comments. icon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 27, 2012 12:18 PM GMT
    endo saidI for one appreciate this!

    Earlier this week a guy on here kept emailing me notes like "We should get together" and "Invite me over" and "I am the answer to your bottom dreams" (ok, really? does that line actually work?). I just ignored them. Did you NOT read my profile? Some of us really are on here for the fitness tips (well, and the forum drama).

    That said, everyone likes picture comments. icon_biggrin.gif

    You expect people to read your profile? Just forget it.

    Only after I put it in my Profile headline that I'm taken did those simpering 'I want to be with you forever' mails stop.
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    Jun 27, 2012 12:28 PM GMT
    bhp91126 said Only after I put it in my Profile headline that I'm taken did those simpering 'I want to be with you forever' mails stop.

    I'll have to consider that. I've got monogamous checked, and I devote a profile paragraph to telling guys not to hit on me, and yet they still do. icon_eek.gif

    I assume they're mostly scams, a lot from outside the US, likely looking for money, or help with a visa or something from me. But I get a few a month, almost always with a new RJ account, giving rather explicit descriptions of what they want from me sexually, mostly all young guys. And they'll mention my being older, so they've read my profile.

    Dudes? I'm old enough to be your grandfather, out of shape and not the least bit attractive, so your motive is rather suspect, yah know? But more than that, I said I'm monogamous and mean it, I don't want you, so why bother? icon_mad.gif
  • great_scott

    Posts: 519

    Jun 27, 2012 1:59 PM GMT
    Friendly vs. flirty. I wouldn't flirt with them, but it wouldn't stop me from initiating conversation if I saw we had something in common. Even though a lot of us are half-dressed, this site seems less sexual and more social (IMO).
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 27, 2012 2:07 PM GMT
    Ari....I weep silently at the thought that you're not the chaste saint I imagined you to be. I shall now go silently sit in the dark, slowly eating the statue I built of you......out of bacon and bacon flavored j lube. icon_redface.gif
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    Jun 27, 2012 2:10 PM GMT
    Sam_u_el saidIt is a lil dis-heartening
    but i feel happy that there are guys who believe in gay love & not just in gay fuck so i cheer up & be friends with them many of my RJ buddies are in relations & i have no qualms being a good friend ...m147.gif


    I hate Open relations & those polygamist fuck-ups

    m036.gif


    But Samuel, without hate, people feel happier, and as a result more open, honest and upfront about who and how they love.
    When that happens, everyone has a better chance to find another that has the same values as themselves without getting involved with incompatible people.
    Less broken hearts, my friend. icon_wink.gif

    Warmly,
    -Doug
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 27, 2012 2:11 PM GMT
    yeah, same here Ariodante: i don't mind chatting with guys in relationships, and being social. its fine, but i think its a waste of my time to get flirty or overtly sexual about things - barking up the wrong tree! if he's wanting to go that route, its downright manipulative. total turn off.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 27, 2012 2:13 PM GMT
    Yeah right!
    "In a Monogamous relationship" while posting pics of their hard cocks and bouncing asses, and asking everyone to please respect their relationship while skyping with other guys online.
    icon_rolleyes.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 27, 2012 2:19 PM GMT
    I've shamelessly left compliments on all kinds of guys profiles. I know it will take more than a few words on a computer screen to someone more than likely too far to reach. Mind you 10 miles is too far for me. If there is any cheating-home wrecking, it will take 2 to tango, 50/50 shared blame. But I'm too emo'ed out at the moment to even trip someones radar. So my own guilt from passed experience is irrelevant.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 27, 2012 3:28 PM GMT
    meninlove said
    Sam_u_el saidIt is a lil dis-heartening
    but i feel happy that there are guys who believe in gay love & not just in gay fuck so i cheer up & be friends with them many of my RJ buddies are in relations & i have no qualms being a good friend ...m147.gif


    I hate Open relations & those polygamist fuck-ups

    m036.gif


    But Samuel, without hate, people feel happier, and as a result more open, honest and upfront about who and how they love.
    When that happens, everyone has a better chance to find another that has the same values as themselves without getting involved with incompatible people.
    Less broken hearts, my friend. icon_wink.gif

    Warmly,
    -Doug


    Doug im talking against those guys who cheat the partners or the married men who fuck around here
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    Jun 27, 2012 3:32 PM GMT
    It's probably worth mentioning that I'm in a monogamous relationship because I'm the only one in it! Although I have to admit almost every day I'm tempted to stray away from myself icon_rolleyes.gif
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    Jun 27, 2012 3:33 PM GMT
    Sam_u_el said
    meninlove said
    Sam_u_el saidIt is a lil dis-heartening
    but i feel happy that there are guys who believe in gay love & not just in gay fuck so i cheer up & be friends with them many of my RJ buddies are in relations & i have no qualms being a good friend ...m147.gif


    I hate Open relations & those polygamist fuck-ups

    m036.gif


    But Samuel, without hate, people feel happier, and as a result more open, honest and upfront about who and how they love.
    When that happens, everyone has a better chance to find another that has the same values as themselves without getting involved with incompatible people.
    Less broken hearts, my friend. icon_wink.gif

    Warmly,
    -Doug


    Doug im talking against those guys who cheat the partners or the married men who fuck around here


    lol, well that's different. Open relationships and polyamorous ones are not cheating in relationships. Cheating can happen in all kinds of relationships. It's when the people involved are not honest. icon_wink.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 27, 2012 3:55 PM GMT
    @Ariodante - ha ha haaa.. I'm feel exactly the same way! If a guy is attached in any way I just loose all interest or cant seem to muster up any.

    On the other hand even though all my online profile clearly indicate that I prefer SINGLE (yes in all caps) guys, I still get messaged now and then by attached guys looking to play. So they, like most else, either don't read profiles (most likely) or are just giving it a shot.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 27, 2012 4:01 PM GMT
    It actually makes me more curious and interested to find out just how Monogamus that relationship is ;) No i'm not a "homowrecker" icon_smile.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 27, 2012 4:09 PM GMT
    Thank God, being married and monogamous doesn't rescind one's inalienable right to flirt.