fell inlove with a straight friend?

  • Luke_1117

    Posts: 1

    Jun 27, 2012 9:35 AM GMT
    well im in that situation right now he knows that im gay and that i have feelings for him, we stayed bestfriends i cuddle with him sometimes and i think its ok with him because he didnt punch me or anything like that he would just say sometimes to get away from him not being really serious,, the thing he keeps saying that hes not gay that he had sex with woman and yes he have a son with his ex gf but im really confused of his sexuality i dont know if he is just playing with my feelings because sometimes he would do and act something that makes me feel that hes into me too, he likes girls alot like rightnow he is dating someone and it hurts me, but still he wants us to remain friends
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    Jun 27, 2012 2:14 PM GMT
    Punctuation, please!!!!

    Is it too much to ask?
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    Jun 27, 2012 2:42 PM GMT
    osakarob saidPunctuation, please!!!!
    Is it too much to ask?


    QFT. Seriously.
  • Dominican_Gen...

    Posts: 379

    Jun 27, 2012 2:57 PM GMT
    Yours is a by-the-book straight friend infatuation and it calls for the by-the-book solution: cut your emotional looses and stop delusing yourself. Either he is gay in the closet (tons of drama) or he is straight and will eventually resent your feelings toward him and cut the friendship (also tons of drama).

    So, give yourself a strong slap in the face and learn to only fall for men that are able to reciprocate.
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    Jun 27, 2012 3:02 PM GMT
    Maybe he just likes you as a friend? Cuddling does not have to be gay. It could just be one human sharing human touch and affection with another.

    Don't expect any more than that though.
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    Jun 27, 2012 3:52 PM GMT
    Dominican_Gent saidYours is a by-the-book straight friend infatuation and it calls for the by-the-book solution: cut your emotional looses and stop delusing yourself. Either he is gay in the closet (tons of drama) or he is straight and will eventually resent your feelings toward him and cut the friendship (also tons of drama).

    So, give yourself a strong slap in the face and learn to only fall for men that are able to reciprocate.


    Yeah, what he said. Sorry, buddy, but falling in love with a straight guy is a big mistake. It can't work. Can. Not. Work.
  • varsitybadboy

    Posts: 62

    Jun 27, 2012 9:12 PM GMT
    Dominican_Gent saidYours is a by-the-book straight friend infatuation and it calls for the by-the-book solution: cut your emotional looses and stop delusing yourself. Either he is gay in the closet (tons of drama) or he is straight and will eventually resent your feelings toward him and cut the friendship (also tons of drama).

    So, give yourself a strong slap in the face and learn to only fall for men that are able to reciprocate.


    Couldn't agree more.

    Been there, it sucks, but you gatta let go of the illusions and cut the emotions!
    He feels comfortable with you, you don't wanna ruin it by believing something you want to happen.

    Sucks, but it happens. icon_neutral.gif
  • Shark100

    Posts: 234

    Jun 29, 2012 3:21 AM GMT
    Luke_1117 saidwell im in that situation right now he knows that im gay and that i have feelings for him, we stayed bestfriends i cuddle with him sometimes and i think its ok with him because he didnt punch me or anything like that he would just say sometimes to get away from him not being really serious,, the thing he keeps saying that hes not gay that he had sex with woman and yes he have a son with his ex gf but im really confused of his sexuality i dont know if he is just playing with my feelings because sometimes he would do and act something that makes me feel that hes into me too, he likes girls alot like rightnow he is dating someone and it hurts me, but still he wants us to remain friends

    I've been there before, it sucks, more because you like the guy or you feel something and to get rid of those feelings for me is really hard, but definitely, as the others said, it can't be if he is straight.....
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    Jun 29, 2012 3:22 AM GMT
    osakarob saidPunctuation, please!!!!

    Is it too much to ask?


    Me fail English? Thats unpossible!
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    Jun 29, 2012 3:23 AM GMT
    I've come to the conclusion that people who don't know proper grammar, spelling, and punctuation, and the most likely to confuse lust with love when it comes to crushing on straight friends.
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    Jun 29, 2012 3:23 AM GMT
    No can haz str8 frenz. U haz type 2 lurn.
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    Jun 29, 2012 3:25 AM GMT
    paulflexes saidI've come to the conclusion that people who don't know proper grammar, spelling, and punctuation, and the most likely to confuse lust with love when it comes to crushing on straight friends.
    Are you doubting the power of love? Don't you know if I feel it, it must be what you feel. Emotions are so real! Don't hate on me cause I love someone so much... omg, this is crazy! Here's my ass, fuck me, maybe?
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    Jun 29, 2012 3:41 AM GMT
    Story of my life hahah icon_redface.gif
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    Jul 01, 2012 5:40 AM GMT
    yes i am also luv wid my straight freind. He is a class fellow of mine. He dont know about my orientation. But i feel bad when we r not together.
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    Jul 23, 2012 5:27 PM GMT
    Luke_1117, this is a very sad situation. I was in a very similar situation years ago before I was married and did not reciprocate my friends advances although I did love him and was highly attracted to him. I just wasn't at a place in my life where I was in touch with my core feelings. There is a growing belief within the World of Pychology that many people are bi and do not act on their feelings because of society's view on it. It is amazing how many people loved the movie 300, but fail to accept that Sparta was an active bi-society.

    There is no way to know what this guy is feeling, but if you have been friends a longtime I recommend either stopping this physical behavior or detatching yourself emotionally from it.

    You will likely eventually push him away and continue to bring yourself heart ache.

    It's ok to love, but you need to exercise some wisdom on who and how your going to love certain people, if you are to survive and succeed in your relationships.
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    Jul 23, 2012 5:52 PM GMT
    osakarob saidPunctuation, please!!!!

    Is it too much to ask?


    Ignore ..Her...!!..uhh!!

    Ok..so you are weaving yourself a tangled web..
    You can't turn feelings on and off..but why go for this guy..??
    Why go with this complicated setup??
    Do you really wan't a guy who is undecided..
    He has sex with women..!!

    Do you think this is the best you can do..???
    What kind of future do you expect to have with this guy..??
    Why are you doing this to yourself..??

    Gay relationships are complicated enough..get out of this mess..pleeze!
    Hugz! icon_neutral.gif
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    Jul 23, 2012 6:09 PM GMT
    You can still hug and be friends. I have a straight friend that I love as a brother and he moved in here to my place to help him out. We hug for long moments but there is no hanky panky. That would just be weird and probably would lose friendship.
  • Nipmuck

    Posts: 35

    Jul 26, 2012 9:22 PM GMT
    It's hard when you fall for someone who's straight. Don't expect him to reciprocate your feelings, it just won't happen. If you'd like a friendship relationship with him, though, that's good. I have some straight friends I've known for years, and it's great. But don't get carried away, or expect anything more than friendship. Stay in control of yourself, and keep your dignity.
  • spacemagic

    Posts: 520

    Jul 27, 2012 3:00 AM GMT
    Oh man. I had it real bad in high school. We were both on newspaper staff, and our classroom had a couch. If either one of us was having a bad day, we'd both sit on the couch and rest our heads one each others shoulders. It made our uber-religious teacher really uncomfortable.
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    Jul 27, 2012 4:07 AM GMT
    Slip him the roofie and see where it goes.