Going to AA today.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 01, 2012 4:13 PM GMT
    I need to quit drinking, was a train wreck last night at Pride. Going to AA today for the first time. Any of you guys in the same boat?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 01, 2012 4:22 PM GMT
    The first, most difficult and most important step. Bets of luck. Chin up!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 01, 2012 4:25 PM GMT
    Aren't you supposed to be a train wreck at Pride?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 01, 2012 4:25 PM GMT
    SportyGuy_1 saidI need to quit drinking, was a train wreck last night at Pride. Going to AA today for the first time. Any of you guys in the same boat?

    Not me, but my late partner was, and tried AA. Many will debate the relative merits and effectiveness of the different programs, but I think the important thing here is that you've recognized your problem, and are willing to seek help for it.

    That's a stage many people never reach, and why they develop into and remain chronic alcoholics. I wish you the best, and don't hesitate to lean on the other guys here for support and encouragement.

    And share your experiences, if you wish, as a help for others. The interesting thing about assisting others is that it often provides reinforcement for yourself, why group therapy can be so effective for some.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 01, 2012 4:27 PM GMT
    You've made a good first step. Good luck. Don't be afraid to to come here to rant when the going is tough and definitely don't be shy about reaching out to your sponsor when you need help. That individual will become a key person in your life.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 01, 2012 4:27 PM GMT
    lol, vodka...I knew drinking that stuff was a bad idea at the time. Not used to it. icon_sad.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 01, 2012 4:44 PM GMT
    SportyGuy_1 saidlol, vodka...I knew drinking that stuff was a bad idea at the time. Not used to it. icon_sad.gif

    I'm not sure why, maybe due to factors like absorption and speed of liver effects, but different alcoholic beverages seem to have different effects on the body. I can drink lots of white wine and I just get a pleasant buzz. Red wine, and also beer, give me a headache, so I generally avoid them.

    When I was young (drinking was legal at 18 in parts of the US in the 1960s, so I never drank underage), vodka was about the only thing I COULD drink. I never liked beer, all wines gave me a headache then, and scotch, tequila, and other hard liquors made me sick, which automatically kept me from being a heavy drinker. I had to train myself to drink gin, because martinis were de rigueur at contemporary cocktail parties in our NYC area.

    Today vodka is on my "watch" list, taken in extreme moderation, but I can handle slightly larger amounts of scotch, and likewise gin, even tequila in a single Margherita. But I'm drinking less overall as I get older, I feel the negative effects too heavily on my body. It's not a pleasure to drink if the entire experience is not pleasurable, and that includes the day after.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 01, 2012 4:50 PM GMT
    I always drink beer. liquor is so strong. icon_eek.gif Screw it. you can't change the past, you have to just learn from it.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 01, 2012 4:51 PM GMT

    Although this site is good for SOME advice...when it comes to AA, please remember that one of the "A"s stand for ANONYMOUS.
    Better to keep your "sharing" to your meeting rooms.
    I will be in contact privately...as it should be.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 01, 2012 5:06 PM GMT
    FriendsOnly said
    Although this site is good for SOME advice...when it comes to AA, please remember that one of the "A"s stand for ANONYMOUS.
    Better to keep your "sharing" to your meeting rooms.
    I will be in contact privately...as it should be.



    This is just one of many reasons why I personally think AA is emotionally unhealthy. I realize it works for some people, but I think it feeds the shame and worthlessness feelings of the alcoholic. Just my humble opinion.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 01, 2012 5:07 PM GMT
    FriendsOnly said
    Although this site is good for SOME advice...when it comes to AA, please remember that one of the "A"s stand for ANONYMOUS.
    Better to keep your "sharing" to your meeting rooms.
    I will be in contact privately...as it should be.

    A web site CAN be anonymous, if you're careful with your information. Although sometimes not even then, as in my case, having my online RJ stalkers who violate my privacy and post my full legal name and that of my partner here, along with other confidential info.

    But nevertheless, a more low-profile member who keeps his profile minimal, avoids personal pics, and reveals few clues about himself could expect a degree of anonymity here. And it's discussion that most of these AA-type programs rely upon, so I would think online discussion could also be good (disregarding the smart-ass posts).
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 01, 2012 5:09 PM GMT
    12 Step meetings can be a great opportunity for personal growth whether you ultimately self-identify as an alcoholic or not.

    When you go, sit in the front of the room (that's where the best seats are). Or, if they just have open seating, pick one near the meeting chair.

    Listen. Share if you feel like it, but you're not obligated.

    Keep going back. If you can, see if you can do 90 meetings in 90 days. It's not easy to do that, but it's possible. It can really turn your life around whether you self-identify as an alcoholic or not.

    Don't feel obligated or pressured to find a "permanent sponsor" (somebody who will help you). Go to a few meetings and listen. Those with wisdom (and lots of sober time) will become apparent. After a few meetings, go and ask somebody you respect if they will consider being your "temporary sponsor". Just somebody who you can check in with and support you while you're getting your feel for the environment.

    Seek out all kinds of meetings. Don't just go to the "pretty gay boy" meetings. Seek out the hard core "down and out" meetings in the "worst part of town". Go. Listen. You may hear stories of jails, institutions, and death. You may think, "That hasn't happened to me". Good. Just rephrase the thought to, "That hasn't happened to me YET"...and take a gratitude lesson from the other person's story.

    Offer to the meeting chair to help set up chairs, break down chairs, whatever needs to be done. Don't fret if there's nothing to do. But offer. Being in service is a great way to help stay sober.

    Read. Get some literature on 12 Step Programs as well as the accompanying 12 Traditions.

    Be prepared to change "people, places, and things" that you have previously connected with the situations and behaviors which are troubling you. You may have to let go of "people, places, and things" which trigger drinking.

    Most importantly, relax. Take it easy. Take it one day at a time (sometimes one hour at a time). Go to the gym and don't be afraid to eat some carbs while you're detoxing from alcohol.

    Keep a journal (electronic or paper) where you can spill your thoughts, learnings, feelings. This will become valuable to you if and when you begin to work through the 12 Steps.

    When you feel the urge to drink, pick up the phone and call a friend in the program. The urge will pass. Your will is stronger. It's all about asking yourself, "What's the next right thing to do". Then finding the strength of will to do that next right thing.

    Remember, we are all powerless over substances once we put them into our body. By surrendering to this fact, we can then (ironically) become empowered to stay sober.

    Please feel free to private message me if I can be of any help or support to you.

    Aloha and Be Well!
    Alan



  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 01, 2012 5:23 PM GMT
    Recognizing that you need a change is the biggest step you can make.

    Find what works for you. Ultimately you have to discover what you are trying to avoid by drinking. Once you figure that out - the desire to medicate it away will diminish.

    Good luck - your life is about to get a little bumpy but far better than you ever realized it could be!!!

    icon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 01, 2012 5:25 PM GMT
    yeah that's very true. I think seeing all the cute gay couples made me jealous. Need to get a boyfriend.
  • CuriousJockAZ

    Posts: 19129

    Jul 01, 2012 5:50 PM GMT
    southbeach1500 saidI think when you get to this point, you really have a problem:
    "The Perils of Shopping While Tipsy"

    Art_Deco said
    Still, shopping when a little tipsy, whether online or in a store, is something I know all about. Because in defiance of my gay genes, I HATE shopping. And when I go into a store I need to be lubed with a martini first, to ease the pain.


    http://www.realjock.com/gayforums/2066773



    This was highly inappropriate without including a helpful link...

    http://www.aabroward.org/search.asp
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 01, 2012 5:50 PM GMT
    Congratulations on a new beginning!

    Best of luck to you!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 01, 2012 5:53 PM GMT
    thanks man. I'm drinking a beer now to get over the hangover. Will go after I finish this Bud.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 01, 2012 5:56 PM GMT
    SportyGuy_1 saidthanks man. I'm drinking a beer now to get over the hangover. Will go after I finish this Bud.


    OK. Now I'm amused.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 01, 2012 6:04 PM GMT
    mickeytopogigio said
    SportyGuy_1 saidthanks man. I'm drinking a beer now to get over the hangover. Will go after I finish this Bud.


    OK. Now I'm amused.


    or trolled
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 01, 2012 6:08 PM GMT
    CrankySpice said
    southbeach1500 said

    Conveniently located in the Wilton Manors neighborhood. icon_eek.gif

    data=Ay5GWBeob_WIPLDYoIWcfVXxvZu9XwJ55OX

    Now now, a joke's a joke, but that isn't Wilton Manors, that's downtown Fort Lauderdale.


    Why do people acknowledge SouthBeach with an actual response? I mean, come on we all know he is a flaming idiot by now, no need to try and make him feel like a human being guys, thats just cruel.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 01, 2012 6:08 PM GMT
    SportyGuy_1 saidyeah that's very true. I think seeing all the cute gay couples made me jealous. Need to get a boyfriend.


    Hmmmmm. Consider putting that idea in the "idea bucket" for now. Look inside yourself and "clean house" first, before inviting another person into your life.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 01, 2012 6:09 PM GMT
    SportyGuy_1 saidthanks man. I'm drinking a beer now to get over the hangover. Will go after I finish this Bud.


    Excellent! Perfect time to go! Really.
  • turtleneckjoc...

    Posts: 4685

    Jul 01, 2012 6:11 PM GMT
    Chainers said
    CrankySpice said
    southbeach1500 said

    Conveniently located in the Wilton Manors neighborhood. icon_eek.gif

    data=Ay5GWBeob_WIPLDYoIWcfVXxvZu9XwJ55OX

    Now now, a joke's a joke, but that isn't Wilton Manors, that's downtown Fort Lauderdale.


    Why do people acknowledge SouthBeach with an actual response? I mean, come on we all know he is a flaming idiot by now, no need to try and make him feel like a human being guys, thats just cruel.


    Thank you, Chainers. There is no place in this world for people like that.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 01, 2012 6:12 PM GMT
    FriendsOnly said
    Although this site is good for SOME advice...when it comes to AA, please remember that one of the "A"s stand for ANONYMOUS.
    Better to keep your "sharing" to your meeting rooms.
    I will be in contact privately...as it should be.

    Every person I have met in this "program" is a psycho. I may have only met a few, but the few I have met, the ones who go to the meetings, all have been nutty liars and losers.
    Just my experience.
    If you don't want to drink, don't. If you want a cult of freaks, losers and psychotics, start attending meetings on a daily basis.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 01, 2012 6:28 PM GMT
    I'd go for the drama. bet you would hear some awesome stories.