Is it me?

  • acesguy20

    Posts: 11

    Jul 02, 2012 6:26 AM GMT
    So my bf and I have been together about 6 months, hes in his 40's and Im early 20's. We have a good relationship and in the beginning when it came to messing around or having sex it was filled with alot of passion, and was rather hot.

    Over the past month or so, things are a lil different. My bf use to get real into sex with me, like taking control and putting me where he wanted me and having his way with me and now its like all he wants is for me to suck em off or if he wants sex, i end up having to ride him, and the sex is only initated wit him. I have to wait till hes horny and wants to do anything.

    He a very in shape good looking guy, as well I but Is it me that he may not be sexually attracted to me anymore or this normal with realtionships regarding this age gap? This is all new to me first gay relationship, first real boyfriend

    Any advice? or Suggestions?
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    Jul 02, 2012 6:40 AM GMT
    Sorry to hear that. Have you tried changing things around a bit? Maybe put on some raunchy porn in the DVD player and tell him you'd like to try something new on him.

  • acesguy20

    Posts: 11

    Jul 02, 2012 6:44 AM GMT
    Nah hes not into watching porn lol idk if its cuz hes been stressing out with work n stuff and weve had a fight recently so idk if thats caused the distance or what but I want my "hot sex" back for sure
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 02, 2012 6:49 AM GMT
    Maybe give him an awesome rimjob. That should jump start him. icon_wink.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 02, 2012 7:12 AM GMT
    sex drive of a 40 yr old is quite different from an early 20's. Wait till he's horny then jump his bones with all you got.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 02, 2012 7:24 AM GMT
    It's you. He's realized he's dating someone who writes like a teenage girl and he is bored.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 02, 2012 8:27 AM GMT
    Lol so mean.

    My suggestion would be to communicate with him, something might be bothering him about the situation, or at work, and it might not even be you. Only by talking to him will you find your answer.
  • DanOmatic

    Posts: 1155

    Jul 02, 2012 4:02 PM GMT
    NugiePugie saidsex drive of a 40 yr old is quite different from an early 20's. Wait till he's horny then jump his bones with all you got.


    This is just part of the reality of 1) being in one's 40s; and 2) the natural progression of most relationships.

    I'm a sexual guy, but at 47, my sex drive is not at all like it was when I was in my 20s. It tends to go in cycles, and that's probably true for most guys in their 40s and older. If that's the issue, you're best off just accepting it and not taking it personally.

    Also, in most relationships, the sex drive dissipates to some degree after the first two or three years. Yes, sex is still important, but it can get routine or boring, or it gives way to a different kind of intimacy. This is usually the point where couples discuss the prospect of opening up the relationship (or not), or explore other ways to get each others' needs meet. The key is communication, and also remembering that the brain is the biggest sex organ in the human body.
  • calibro

    Posts: 8888

    Jul 02, 2012 4:07 PM GMT
    read this post in 20 years... it will make perfect sence then
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    Jul 02, 2012 4:08 PM GMT
    sis, get you sum young diq
  • Ivanos1982

    Posts: 3

    Jul 04, 2012 4:53 PM GMT
    Ok I'm also in my 20's and my bf is 45 so I can relate. I've been with him for three years now and counting. Sex is not going to be perfect forever, he is getting older you have to understand that. One day he will be 50 and you will be 30 something. So you have to prepare for that mentally. Enjoy what you have is what I would say, if he doesn't give you enough sex, then jerk off. I have sex with my bf almost every day so I'm lucky he's very horny but when we don't have sex for a week I feel a bit worried too, usually it is because he is stressed out from work. It's normal dude, don't worry about it too much. Best of luck! icon_smile.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 07, 2012 3:15 AM GMT
    As in so many relationship issues, this is about communication, not sex. Rather than ask us, you should be asking him what 's going on. Is he aware of your feelings and fears? Maybe, maybe not -- assume nothing. If sharing feelings isn't easy for either of you, consider seeing a counselor who can teach you ways of communication that you will be forever grateful to have.
    Take charge, and good luck!