anyone else tired of the 'stereotype gay'

• bryandurel
  
  Posts: 13
  
  
  Jul 09, 2012 10:03 AM GMT

  finding it a bit harder to keep straight friends in new york city.
  
  once someone knows youre gay they expect you to act like 'jack' from 'will and grace'.
  
  

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  Jul 09, 2012 10:11 AM GMT

  Friends? I don't follow you.

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  Jul 09, 2012 10:20 AM GMT

  bryandurel saidfinding it a bit harder to keep straight friends in new york city.
  
  once someone knows youre gay they expect you to act like 'jack' from 'will and grace'.
  
  

  
  Odd, I would have thought the cause of a gay being unable to keep straight friends was that he DID act like Jack. Why would straights be turned off by a gay acting the same as they do themselves in most regards, in other words, acting straight?
  
  I've never heard of that. Are you saying straights are disappointed when a gay doesn't do gay tricks and fails to entertain them in a gay manner?

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• bryandurel
  
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  Jul 09, 2012 10:33 AM GMT

  ArtDecoAre you saying straights are disappointed when a gay doesn't do gay tricks and fails to entertain them in a gay manner?

  
  
  exactly. the other day i got a bit late at a meeting with some old co-workers and when i arrived there they had already ordered me... a cosmo. i wanted to tear my hair out. i wanted a beer but because i'm gay, i would want to have that.
  
  

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  Jul 09, 2012 10:46 AM GMT

  bryandurel saidfinding it a bit harder to keep straight friends in new york city.
  
  once someone knows youre gay they expect you to act like 'jack' from 'will and grace'.
  
  

  
  
  Honestly, my straight friends think its funny I'm not stereotypically gay. Then again, I don't think my friends would care if I was.

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  Jul 09, 2012 11:03 AM GMT

  LOL CRY MOAR

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• TheBizMan
  
  Posts: 4091
  
  
  Jul 09, 2012 11:06 AM GMT

  bryandurel said

  ArtDecoAre you saying straights are disappointed when a gay doesn't do gay tricks and fails to entertain them in a gay manner?

  
  
  exactly. the other day i got a bit late at a meeting with some old co-workers and when i arrived there they had already ordered me... a cosmo. i wanted to tear my hair out. i wanted a beer but because i'm gay, i would want to have that.
  
  

  
  
  This wreaks of hogwash
  
  

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  Jul 09, 2012 11:09 AM GMT

  TheBizMan said

  bryandurel said

  ArtDecoAre you saying straights are disappointed when a gay doesn't do gay tricks and fails to entertain them in a gay manner?

  exactly. the other day i got a bit late at a meeting with some old co-workers and when i arrived there they had already ordered me... a cosmo. i wanted to tear my hair out. i wanted a beer but because i'm gay, i would want to have that.

  This wreaks of hogwash

  Yep.
  
  
  That's the second one today.

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  Jul 09, 2012 11:16 AM GMT

  bryandurel said

  ArtDecoAre you saying straights are disappointed when a gay doesn't do gay tricks and fails to entertain them in a gay manner?

  
  exactly. the other day i got a bit late at a meeting with some old co-workers and when i arrived there they had already ordered me... a cosmo. i wanted to tear my hair out. i wanted a beer but because i'm gay, i would want to have that.

  
  Right, and Blacks all eat watermelon, Jews mostly eat lox on a bagel, Italians all want to have spaghetti at every meal... (My apologies to RJ members in those groups, just making an equally ridiculous stereotypical comparison)
  
  OK, so these stupid co-workers have stupid stereotypes. But if you asked for a beer instead, would they be disappointed? Would it make it harder for you to keep your friends over it? Because that was your point, and what I asked you to please clarify.
  
  You have a great opportunity to dispel their stereotypes, by letting them see your natural self, and "acting against type" as the theatre term goes. I still can't imagine how that would weaken friendships, unless you're their token gay who keeps them amused. It would be your own fault if you have surrounded yourself with such superficial & clueless friends (co-workers not being your own choice), because I can assure you not all people are that way, and least of all in NYC.

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  Jul 09, 2012 11:23 AM GMT

  bryandurel said

  ArtDeco

  
  
  exactly. the other day i got a bit late at a meeting with some old co-workers and when i arrived there they had already ordered me... a cosmo.
  
  

  
  
  It could have been as a joke because they know how masculine you are and that you would never order a cosmo. I would have laughed and made some joke making fun of them.
  
  Relax.

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  Jul 09, 2012 12:06 PM GMT

  Whoa. Since when did Jack McFarland become the stereotypical gay?
  
  This is the one annoying side effect of leaving straight people to put gay people in shows. They can't get past their own idea of what GAY is. Queer as Folk had the full rainbow. The slick executive, the adorable puppy dog, the fledgling, the nerdy low self-esteem queen, the flamer, soft hearted but tough-as-nails lezzers.
  
  On the other hand Ryan Murphy loves him some Kurt flaming at full brightness.
  
  Gay people just lap it up because of the exposure in the media...but what exactly do others get from that exposure?
  
  OP: learn to love the Jack McFarland in yourself.

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  Jul 09, 2012 12:19 PM GMT

  Jack McFarland? Really?
  
  Do all your "straight friends" live in 1999?

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  Jul 09, 2012 12:20 PM GMT

  Green Lantern is gay now. So far I haven't seen any purses or rainbows shooting out of his ring. ;)

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  Jul 09, 2012 12:28 PM GMT

  Balljunkie said

  bryandurel said

  ArtDeco

  
  exactly. the other day i got a bit late at a meeting with some old co-workers and when i arrived there they had already ordered me... a cosmo.
  

  
  It could have been as a joke because they know how masculine you are and that you would never order a cosmo. I would have laughed and made some joke making fun of them.
  
  Relax.

  
  Good advice. Humor is how I often handle awkward situations, especially self-deprecating humor (as opposed to self-defecating humor, when I laugh too hard). And having poked fun at myself, I then turn the tables and do a little poking at those who created the situation in the first place.
  
  BTW, your quote included me above, but those were entirely bryandurel's words about the cosmo. I made my own comments about it a few posts later.

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  Jul 09, 2012 12:31 PM GMT

  MadExistence saidGreen Lantern is gay now. So far I haven't seen any purses or rainbows shooting out of his ring. ;)

  
  
  No, they will be green spanx and jockstraps.

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• HottJoe
  
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  Jul 09, 2012 1:42 PM GMT

  n8698u said

  MadExistence saidGreen Lantern is gay now. So far I haven't seen any purses or rainbows shooting out of his ring. ;)

  
  
  No, they will be green spanx and jockstraps.

  
  
  Good for him!
  
  I don't like cosmos either, but if Green Lantern has to be straight acting then he's not a very brave superhero.
  
  Why not just be your gay self and not worry about what straight people think of you?... Anyway maybe they too think you'd be more fun if you let loose a little.

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• daveindenver
  
  Posts: 425
  
  
  Jul 09, 2012 3:41 PM GMT

  If you wanna "tear your hair out " about the wrong drink, well maybe they weren't too far off base about you....yknow?

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  Jul 09, 2012 3:49 PM GMT

  then educate your so called "friends" so they'll get over their dated, pre-conceived stereotypes instead of complaining.

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  Jul 09, 2012 6:55 PM GMT

  Anderson Cooper is out now, and I wouldn't classify him as stereotypical. I also met a guy who graduated from my high school way back in the day over pride that wasn't a stereotypical gay guy (granted he's only gay for legal reasons. Long story.). They exist. Just sayin'.

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• HPgeek934
  
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  Jul 09, 2012 7:03 PM GMT

  getnassty saidthen educate your so called "friends" so they'll get over their dated, pre-conceived stereotypes instead of complaining.

  
  
  This

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  Jul 09, 2012 7:07 PM GMT

  bryandurel saidfinding it a bit harder to keep straight friends in new york city.
  
  once someone knows youre gay they expect you to act like 'jack' from 'will and grace'.
  
  

  
  
  Stop lying.

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  Jul 09, 2012 9:29 PM GMT

  Trollileo saidWho's Jack?

  
  
  I hate you.
  
  

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  Jul 09, 2012 10:08 PM GMT

  Some of my friends are gayer than me. One goes to lesbian bars just to check out the beer ads in the gay rags (he worked for bud light at one time and is an alcoholic). And the others hold hands a skip down the sidewalk and stuff like that just for laughs.

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  Jul 09, 2012 10:09 PM GMT

  I'm trying harder and harder to see why people don't notice that the stereotype is outdated.

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  Jul 09, 2012 10:21 PM GMT

  TrevorMark saidI'm trying harder and harder to see why people don't notice that the stereotype is outdated.

  Cause gays still let those old fashioned thinkers run their minds, self image and lives. Sigh*

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