Made the mistake of having unprotected sex..now I guess I must freak out for the next 3 months

  • dexterboi1231

    Posts: 40

    Jul 12, 2012 10:12 PM GMT
    I had been so good at always using condoms up to this point. I don't know what I was thinking..but I topped a guy two nights ago without a condom. I asked him if he had anything afterwards (good one..) and he said "no, I was in a relationship and tested negatively afterwards." But obviously I can't just trust people. I know there's nothing I can do now but wait until three months have passed, but is there anyway to relax myself so that I don't go crazy during this time?

    edit: I now see this would have been more appropriate in the Health forum...sorry
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    Jul 12, 2012 10:21 PM GMT
    Call your physician immediately and take the PEP regimen. Explain what happened and they'll know what it is.
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    Jul 12, 2012 10:25 PM GMT
    Been there..i'd love to tell you .."it's gonna be ok"..but you know the consequences of unprotected sex....So i'll tell you straight up as if i were a good friend...Here goes

    What the Fuck were you thinking..???
    Are you gonna let a few hours of moaning and groaning fuck up your life??
    No Really.??.What the hell happened to your i.q...did you return it to Walmart where you bought it in the first place...???
    Come on.!!.so you are going to waste...hold on...the next 2160 hours contemplating if you got infected...
    If your parents knew how careless you were they would be truly dissapointed!!..

    Gave you the same speech by BFF gave me..hope it'l stick..Hugz.. Keep us posted!..Alvin
  • dexterboi1231

    Posts: 40

    Jul 12, 2012 10:26 PM GMT
    Anocxu saidBeen there..i'd love to tell you .."it's gonna be ok"..but you know the consequences of unprotected sex....So i'll tell you straight up as if i were a good friend...Here goes

    What the Fuck were you thinking..???
    Are you gonna let a few hours of moaning and groaning fuck up your life??
    No Really.??.What the hell happened to your i.q...did you return it to Walmart where you bought it in the first place...???
    Come on.!!.so you are going to waste...hold on...the next 2160 hours contemplating if you got infected...
    If your parents knew how careless you were they would be truly dissapointed!!..

    Gave you the same speech by BFF gave me..hope it'l stick..Hugz.. Keep us posted!..Alvin


    lol..hours..it was like 2 minutes icon_sad.gif
    I can try to live my life normally but damn...this will definitely be in the back of my mind the whole time
  • dexterboi1231

    Posts: 40

    Jul 12, 2012 10:52 PM GMT
    brueges saidCall your physician immediately and take the PEP regimen. Explain what happened and they'll know what it is.


    Would you guys all recommend this? I don't really have a physician..
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    Jul 12, 2012 11:13 PM GMT
    From everything I've heard, that stuff only works if started within 24-48 hours. But I haven't researched it at all.

    Also, not to downplay unprotected sex, but if you topped him, even if he was infected, the liklihood of you getting infected is phenomenally low. That doesn't mean you shouldn't freak out slightly, the more you do, the less likely you are to make the same mistake again.

    That being said, you can request a PCR test which will show a more in depth and quicker result if you are infected. However, unless you have GOOD insurance, I think requesting something like that is ridiculously expensive.

    Best advice would be to try to live your life normally until you can take the test and get an accurate result.

    Best of luck to you, and if you do find out that you are now positive, just know that it isn't the end of the world.
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    Jul 12, 2012 11:23 PM GMT
    dexterboi1231 said
    brueges saidCall your physician immediately and take the PEP regimen. Explain what happened and they'll know what it is.


    Would you guys all recommend this? I don't really have a physician..



    Assuming you are circumcised and only had your dick in his ass for 2min, your risk is relatively minimal (0.0016% infection chance per unprotected encounter in this manner).

    Uncut tops and bottoms run a risk about 8x-12x greater, or 0.02% per unprotected encounter.

    The risks scale upward if the encounter was certainly with a known HIV+ carrier, and more so if he has a high viral load.

    Of course, HIV is the big scary bug, but just as bad and potentially life-changing are the various incurable Hepatitis strains, as well as the standard STIs like chlamydia and gonorrhea which increase your susceptibility to infection upon exposure to HIV.


    Google up "Planned Parenthood" or "HIV STD Clinic" in West Palm Beach.

    There's got be a few clinics that can give you the quick test (not as reliable as the standard ELISA screening that can only track the three months window).

    The STD clinic may offer PEP. It will probably make you feel sick and give you flu like symptoms and the shits for a week, and you'll want to eat plenty of probiotic yoghurt to restore your "good intestinal bacteria" should the doctor give you an infusion or doxycycline or some other potent antibiotic as a preemptive against gonorrhea, chlamydia, and other such bugs.
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    Jul 12, 2012 11:37 PM GMT
    texasrunner2247 saidFrom everything I've heard, that stuff only works if started within 24-48 hours. But I haven't researched it at all.

    Also, not to downplay unprotected sex, but if you topped him, even if he was infected, the liklihood of you getting infected is phenomenally low. That doesn't mean you shouldn't freak out slightly, the more you do, the less likely you are to make the same mistake again.

    That being said, you can request a PCR test which will show a more in depth and quicker result if you are infected. However, unless you have GOOD insurance, I think requesting something like that is ridiculously expensive.

    Best advice would be to try to live your life normally until you can take the test and get an accurate result.

    Best of luck to you, and if you do find out that you are now positive, just know that it isn't the end of the world.

    What you've written is correct. The PCR (Polymerase Chain Reaction) test uses a blood sample to look for HIV RNA. It is effective at a mean of 17 days from infection.

    The OP doesn't have a physician, so I don't know how else he could arrange to have the PCR test done. Otherwise a more conventional test requires a 3 to 6-month waiting period for antigens to develop. Typically a person will first test at 3 months, and then again at 6. Either a blood draw or a mouth swab can be done, and the oral swab is frequently given for free or a nominal fee at LGBT community centers. I believe this one may be accessible to the OP:

    http://www.compassglcc.com/hours.html

    Like you, I think the OP's likelihood of infection is lower as a top, according to his story, but still possible. Nevertheless, all sexually active gay men should have themselves routinely checked for HIV and other STDs at least annually, preferably at 6, whether or not they believe they've had a specific exposure incident. Therefore, the OP should phone the Compass number in the link and arrange for a rapid test, with results within 30 minutes, at the 3-month mark.

    Even better, test ASAP, to establish that he isn't already poz at this time, since he's been sexually active for a while. Should he subsequently test poz at 3 or 6 months, he can narrow down the infection episode and source.
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    Jul 12, 2012 11:45 PM GMT
    texasrunner2247 said

    Also, not to downplay unprotected sex, but if you topped him, even if he was infected, the liklihood of you getting infected is phenomenally low. That doesn't mean you shouldn't freak out slightly, the more you do, the less likely you are to make the same mistake again.



    This is dead wrong. Tops can get HIV. It happened to a guy I know. He thought what you're thinking... now he's been on meds for 15 years. Don't make the same mistake.
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    Jul 12, 2012 11:50 PM GMT
    brueges said
    texasrunner2247 said

    Also, not to downplay unprotected sex, but if you topped him, even if he was infected, the liklihood of you getting infected is phenomenally low. That doesn't mean you shouldn't freak out slightly, the more you do, the less likely you are to make the same mistake again.



    This is dead wrong. Tops can get HIV. It happened to a guy I know. He thought what you're thinking... now he's been on meds for 15 years. Don't make the same mistake.


    I didn't say it was impossible, but that the liklihood is much lower than that of bottoming unprotected.
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    Jul 13, 2012 12:28 AM GMT
    dexterboi1231 said
    brueges saidCall your physician immediately and take the PEP regimen. Explain what happened and they'll know what it is.


    Would you guys all recommend this? I don't really have a physician..


    Speaking as a doctor, I think PEP is a bit extreme. Fair enough, if the sexual partner was known to have HIV, but the risk of you contracting HIV from one sexual episode while you we topping is very low unless he bled from his arse all over your dick and not to forget actually have HIV.

    PEP only really works within the first 24 hours, best taken within the first hour actually after exposure.

    You knew the risks, it was a silly mistake. Its extremely unlikely that you have contracted anything, so try not to worry and hopefully this is a blessing in disguise as you will have learnt never to do it again as you will remember how shit you feel now.
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    Jul 13, 2012 1:36 AM GMT
    Can't sugar coat this subject..OP..you get my drift right..???..Hugz..icon_biggrin.gif
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    Jul 13, 2012 1:45 AM GMT
    gaba-source-naturals-tablets180.jpg
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    Jul 13, 2012 1:56 AM GMT
    Perhaps educate yourself, and you wouldn't worry so much. The answers are in what you don't know.
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    Jul 13, 2012 2:02 AM GMT
    You cant get it from someone who aint got it. I'll bet you dollars to doughnuts you are fine, cuz he is prolly correct, since he has been tested.

    However, to scare the living bejesus out of you so that you wont ever do it again....here are the facts.


    VERY HIGH RISK:
    To yourself if you are HIV-Negative:
    Topping an HIV+ ass bareback. 2
    Topping an HIV+ ass bareback if you are uncircumcised. 2
    Bottoming bareback and taking loads from a partner whose HIV status you do not know.
    Having unprotected sex while "partying".
    Getting fucked by a cock that just came out of someone else's cum-filled ass.
    Using someone else's cum as lube for your ass if you do not know their HIV status.
    Barebacking (top or bottom) before, during, or after aggressive assplay with someone whose HIV status you do not know. 3
    Barebacking (top or bottom) with active symptoms from other STD's 4


    Please note that HIV-Negative tops fucking HIV+Positive bottoms has been upgraded to the level of "Very High Risk" following findings that indicate rectal secretions in the anus contain a higher percentage of HIV than either blood or semen, thereby presenting a more serious risk to HIV-Negative tops than was previously believed. It has also been determined that uncurcumcised men are even more susceptible to infection than circumcised men due to the presence of DC-SIGN in the foreskin. For more information, please visit The Wyas Your Body Betrays in our Health Dept.


    http://www.barebackhealth.net/health/risks.html
  • FRE0

    Posts: 4865

    Aug 17, 2012 4:12 AM GMT
    Anyone who engages in anal sex is taking a significant risk since condoms do sometimes break. To minimize the risk, it would be a good idea to have plans to get prophylactic drug treatment quickly if a condom does break. The more quickly the treatment begins, the more likely it is to prevent HIV infection. Thus, treatment should begin within a few hours or less.
  • MikemikeMike

    Posts: 6932

    Aug 18, 2012 12:40 AM GMT
    why not drag the idiot who let u stick your dick in his ass to go get tested as wellicon_idea.gif I bet you're not the first he's let do thaticon_idea.gificon_idea.gificon_idea.gif
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    Aug 18, 2012 12:55 AM GMT
    just calm down and ask ur doctor advise,and called ur hookup partner to inform him ur conciousness,by the way,he is in a relationship but go out and let ppl fuck him bareback,wat a fucking bitch.Even open relationship might be the fact he did it,atleast put on a condom for both's fuck sake.

  • MikemikeMike

    Posts: 6932

    Aug 18, 2012 12:59 AM GMT
    wait don't tell me you don't know how to contact them???!!???
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    Aug 18, 2012 1:09 AM GMT
    I suggest you go talk to your medical professional and determine your best options. I pray you'll be just fine.

    PS - Sometimes I wonder if all the monies we spend/donate on HIV education and PSA's have any effect. It's not like one can't know better. Or perhaps Momma Gump was right, "Stupid is as stupid does." (Sorry for calling you that, but... golly... gee...) I agree with Anocxu, one really shouldn't sugar coat this issue.
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    Aug 18, 2012 1:12 AM GMT
    daviddoublebay saidEven with insurance, PEP is expensive.

    I don't know what it costs now, but about 8 years ago when I did the month-long regimen, it was $600 for the prescription. I have NO IDEA of whether it is much less... or more... now.

    I'm not sure that I was exposed, but I'm glad that I did it. Peace of mind was worth 600 bucks.

    If I WAS exposed, then the $600 was absolutely worth it.


    Ouch, either way, expensive trick, huh?
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    Aug 18, 2012 1:14 AM GMT
    No, you can freak out now... and forever... stop being so self destructive! No condom, no sex!
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    Aug 18, 2012 1:22 AM GMT
    Call him up and test his reaction, let him know that you're positive and he should get tested. If that will scare the shit out of him then you're good, kinda...It's mean but it will teach him a lesson about unprotected sex and hopefully you've learned yours.
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    Aug 18, 2012 1:42 AM GMT

    Aug 17, 2012 9:07 PM

    daviddoublebay said
    Get your ass to the emergency room icon_exclaim.gif

    You have 72 hours from exposure to start it.

    98% effective.

    http://www.avert.org/pep-prep-hiv.htm

    This thread was started over a month ago.
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    Aug 18, 2012 2:05 AM GMT
    There isn't much anyone can say to you right now to help you feel better. I hope you stay negative, get tested since it has been about a month, then 60 and 90 days. With each negative result you will feel better.