Being a man--defined?

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    Jul 17, 2012 1:09 AM GMT
    Quite simply, do you feel--as a man--that there is a certain way you are supposed to act? Is it possible to give "manhood" qualifiers that most people would agree to?

    Im not talking about the moment you think a boy becomes a man, and Im also not talking about masculinity versus femininity in males.

    (Myself, I never gave manhood much thought, but a straight friend insists that most guys follow some sort of gentleman's code.)
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    Jul 17, 2012 1:11 AM GMT
    Afterwards said

    Im also not talking about masculinity versus femininity in males.


    Abandon hope all ye who think this is not what this thread will turn into.

    250px-Z%C3%BCrich_-_Kunsthaus_-_Rodin's_
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    Jul 17, 2012 1:11 AM GMT
    Too subjective, you'll never get a definite answer
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    Jul 17, 2012 1:14 AM GMT
    Afterwards saidQuite simply, do you feel--as a man--that there is a certain way you are supposed to act?
    Yes...I'm supposed to drive a pickup, chew tobaccy and spit everywhere, marry some ugly fat woman, raise some nasty unbathed kids, and live in a very previously owned trailer somewhere 20 miles outside of a small town where we live happily everafter and kill chickens every evening for dinner.

    Oh wait, that's Kentucky's version of the American dream.
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    Jul 17, 2012 1:30 AM GMT
    Answer to:

    A) Do you feel--as a man--that there is a certain way you are supposed to act? Is it possible to give "manhood" qualifiers that most people would agree to?
    Well there are certain responsibilities a real man should embrace..
    A real man should be able to:

    Provide
    Protect
    Love unconditionally
    Embrace his emotions
    Conquor his fears
    Real men should be able to keep secrets
    Real men should have few secrets


    B)
    but a straight friend insists that most guys follow some sort of gentleman's code..
    These listed above...
    (This is not a straight or gay issue)




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    Jul 17, 2012 1:46 AM GMT
    Humility
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    Jul 17, 2012 1:51 AM GMT
    MuchoMasQueMusculo saidDoesn't use his power to subjugate others simply for being weaker than him.


    What if you want a powerful man to subjugate you because you are weaker than him?
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    Jul 17, 2012 1:54 AM GMT
    It's about a sense of integrity in everything he does. By integrity I mean more than simple honesty, all though that is part of it. He is trusted to do as he says and say what he means. He doesn't pander, or blow smoke up peoples rears, but he also isn't cruel about it. He acts instead of reacts. He does not act with harmful intent. He considers the impact of his decisions on the living beings around him, then acts decisively. It's a state of honorable self control. It's leadership from legitimacy. You lead because people entrust their stake based on a character that is impeccable. He maintains his confidences to the grave. You can tell him anything and you know for certain it will never be repeated. Manhood is about the way a person carries himself. It's not about how masculine or tough he acts, sometimes, those things are just cover ups for a failed sense of manhood. It's about carrying yourself with a sense of honor, dignity and integrity, and when a quiet but sure confidence grows out of an alignment of values and actions.
  • xysx

    Posts: 306

    Jul 17, 2012 1:56 AM GMT
    II_Dolce_..Mensch....

    ^^that.

    also,
    Ariodante250px-Z%C3%BCrich_-_Kunsthaus_-_Rodin's_

    ^ My favorite piece.
  • YJacket

    Posts: 146

    Jul 17, 2012 2:00 AM GMT
    Claystation saidToo subjective, you'll never get a definite answer


    Pretty much.
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    Jul 17, 2012 2:01 AM GMT
    I had to learn this poem by heart way back in grade school. Memorizing it wasn't a problem, but decades later I'm still working on some of the principles.....

    http://www.kipling.org.uk/poems_if.htm

    IF

    If you can keep your head when all about you
    Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
    If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
    But make allowance for their doubting too;
    If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
    Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
    Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
    And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:
    If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
    If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;
    If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
    And treat those two impostors just the same;
    If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
    Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
    Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
    And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools:

    If you can make one heap of all your winnings
    And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
    And lose, and start again at your beginnings
    And never breathe a word about your loss;
    If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
    To serve your turn long after they are gone,
    And so hold on when there is nothing in you
    Except the Will which says to them: 'Hold on!'

    If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
    ' Or walk with Kings - nor lose the common touch,
    if neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
    If all men count with you, but none too much;
    If you can fill the unforgiving minute
    With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
    Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
    And - which is more - you'll be a Man, my son!

    ~~Rudyard Kipling
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    Jul 17, 2012 2:01 AM GMT
    JackBlair69 saidTestosterone. We all have it (white Liberal males seem to have a depletion problem, however...).

    It seems you have been infected with the silly ideas of the academic Left (which is to say, academia).

    "Gender is a social construct, man."

    No. You're a man. ACT LIKE ONE.


    Yer baby oil...Yer little hat....yer preening little pose (assuming it is even yer real pic)...Do YOU realize how quickly you would get a right hook to the jaw in certain bars????

    Amateur amateurs are amateur.
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    Jul 17, 2012 2:07 AM GMT
    Chainers said
    MuchoMasQueMusculo saidDoesn't use his power to subjugate others simply for being weaker than him.


    What if you want a powerful man to subjugate you because you are weaker than him?


    Agreed upon power exchange is a different kettle of fish. icon_razz.gif
  • YJacket

    Posts: 146

    Jul 17, 2012 2:09 AM GMT
    theantijock said...

    http://www.kipling.org.uk/poems_if.htm

    ...
    ~~Rudyard Kipling


    Nice. One of my favorite poems.
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    Jul 17, 2012 2:09 AM GMT
    xysx said
    II_Dolce_..Mensch....

    ^^that.

    also,
    Ariodante250px-Z%C3%BCrich_-_Kunsthaus_-_Rodin's_

    ^ My favorite piece.


    you can throw Rodin into any thread and win!
  • xysx

    Posts: 306

    Jul 17, 2012 2:18 AM GMT
    tru 'dat.
  • xysx

    Posts: 306

    Jul 17, 2012 2:18 AM GMT
    tru 'dat.
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    Jul 17, 2012 2:20 AM GMT
    I don't worry about it. I just be myself and let everyone else worry about it. It's been working so far.
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    Jul 17, 2012 2:22 AM GMT
    YngHungSFSD saidIt's about a sense of integrity in everything he does. By integrity I mean more than simple honesty, all though that is part of it. He is trusted to do as he says and say what he means. He doesn't pander, or blow smoke up peoples rears, but he also isn't cruel about it. He acts instead of reacts. He does not act with harmful intent. He considers the impact of his decisions on the living beings around him, then acts decisively. It's a state of honorable self control. It's leadership from legitimacy. You lead because people entrust their stake based on a character that is impeccable. He maintains his confidences to the grave. You can tell him anything and you know for certain it will never be repeated. Manhood is about the way a person carries himself. It's not about how masculine or tough he acts, sometimes, those things are just cover ups for a failed sense of manhood. It's about carrying yourself with a sense of honor, dignity and integrity, and when a quiet but sure confidence grows out of an alignment of values and actions.


    Integrity is what I think tops the list for me as well. This piece says it beautifully. Every guy who aspires to be a man should read and digest this, IMO.
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    Jul 17, 2012 2:27 AM GMT
    Claystation saidToo subjective, you'll never get a definite answer


    Good point.

    There are really very few definitive answers to ANYthing.

    BUT

    Owning who you are and not making excuses is a POSSIBLE indication of Manhood.

    Clay has been to war. I collect antiques.

    I can't compete.

    BUT

    Who is more of a Man?

    Clay and I have never met in RL -- but if We did and anyone gave Him shit...they would have to go thru Me.

    And I don't recommend that.

    Yer a Man when You feel like one.

    It ain't about how thick yer dick is or how big yer pecs are.

    It's more about when you don't let anyone give you shit.

    And you stand up for your friends.

    I could wear a gown and tiara...AIN'T NO one gonna question whether I am a Man.

    NOT because I am MASC or LAID BACK or down to earth....

    But because I AM a MAN.

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    Jul 17, 2012 2:31 AM GMT
    Cash said

    Good point.

    There are really very few definitive answers to ANYthing.

    BUT

    Owning who you are and not making excuses is a POSSIBLE indication of Manhood.

    Clay has been to war. I collect antiques.

    I can't compete.

    BUT

    Who is more of a Man?

    Clay and I have never met in RL -- but if We did and anyone gave Him shit...they would have to go thru Me.

    And I don't recommend that.

    Yer a Man when You feel like one.

    It ain't about how thick yer dick is or how big yer pecs are.

    It's more about when you don't let anyone give you shit.

    And you stand up for your friends.

    I could wear a gown and tiara...AIN'T NO one gonna question whether I am a Man.

    NOT because I am MASC or LAID BACK or down to earth....

    But because I AM a MAN.



    You're a man?! icon_eek.gif

    EDIT: You'd stand up for me?! icon_eek.gif
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    Jul 17, 2012 2:53 AM GMT
    Claystation said
    Cash said

    Good point.

    There are really very few definitive answers to ANYthing.

    BUT

    Owning who you are and not making excuses is a POSSIBLE indication of Manhood.

    Clay has been to war. I collect antiques.

    I can't compete.

    BUT

    Who is more of a Man?

    Clay and I have never met in RL -- but if We did and anyone gave Him shit...they would have to go thru Me.

    And I don't recommend that.

    Yer a Man when You feel like one.

    It ain't about how thick yer dick is or how big yer pecs are.

    It's more about when you don't let anyone give you shit.

    And you stand up for your friends.

    I could wear a gown and tiara...AIN'T NO one gonna question whether I am a Man.

    NOT because I am MASC or LAID BACK or down to earth....

    But because I AM a MAN.



    You're a man?! icon_eek.gif

    EDIT: You'd stand up for me?! icon_eek.gif


    The gown and the tiara threw You off didn't it????

    I KNEW i shouldn't have worn it on our first night out....

    Yes.

    SOMEone has to.
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    Jul 17, 2012 2:54 AM GMT
    Claystation saidEDIT: You'd stand up for me?! icon_eek.gif


    We'd all stand up for you.
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    Jul 17, 2012 2:55 AM GMT
    DudeInNOVA said
    Claystation saidEDIT: You'd stand up for me?! icon_eek.gif


    We'd all stand up for you.


    inside our pants


    SHAZOW!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 17, 2012 2:55 AM GMT
    Cash said

    The gown and the tiara threw You off didn't it????

    I KNEW i shouldn't have worn it on our first night out....

    Yes.

    SOMEone has to.


    Yes, yes it did.

    Most of the time I have to do the standing up for other people thing, but if you're going to do it for me. I dont mind being a spectator icon_biggrin.gif