Why don't most young gay men want to just go on a date or be in a relationship? Is it so hard to find a muscle stud thats handsome that DOESNT want to just have sex and bounce??

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    Jul 23, 2012 2:32 AM GMT
    So I am very confused and maybe some of you guys can help me out...

    I have never dated anyone before...I am new to being open with who I am as a young gay men as of a year ago and I can for sure say that I love men.

    Over the past 6 months, I have held accounts on internet sites trying to meet men. I actually had never had sex and never even kissed a guy, until I met this one dude, i was 22. He was way hot and i thought he just wanted to talk, but long LONG story short, he charmed me, got me out of my pants, and tossed me to the side like a rag doll...i was heartbroken. I know i could have stopped having sex with him, but everything just felt so good and new...i didn't know HOW to say no.!...he was the first guy i was WITH and he didn't even want me anymore...

    Since then, I have been trying to meet someone else w/o having sex, but NO ONE my age wants to even go on a date or something. and if they do, they are very un-attractive (not to be mean) or 50+ yrs old and un-attractive...

    so my question is: why is it so damn hard to find a handsome, in-shape guy around ages 20-25 that wants something more than a quick fuck? Straight couples my age have relationships, I just don't understand we as gay men can't have the same thing...and sucks more bc I'm trying to resist hookups but it so tempting, bc no i know what sex feels like...

    Am I being too serious for my age?? If its me, please tell me...I just want to love on a guy in more than a sexual way, is that so bad??

    HELP ME OUT REALJOCK MEN!!
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    Jul 23, 2012 2:41 AM GMT
    Why is this site so full of people desperate to have a relationship?! I honestly don't get it. I am in a great relationship now, but let me tell you the urge to have "guest stars" will soon become present for all parties involved.
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    Jul 23, 2012 2:46 AM GMT
    You can get a date online, but it can be much more difficult. I've found that most guys online (not all) seem to have some kind of social issue, which makes them gravitate towards casual sex rather than actual dating, regardless of what they might claim in their profile. Casual sex is much safer emotionally than a date, so those with fears of intimacy will get caught in that trap very easily. Try putting yourself out in the real world if you want real world dates.
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    Jul 23, 2012 2:48 AM GMT
    What I've learned: patience. I haven't even done anything with a guy yet, just wait and see what happens because you could end up getting used again.
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    Jul 23, 2012 2:49 AM GMT


    cmcclend said,

    " so my question is: why is it so damn hard to find a handsome, in-shape guy around ages 20-25 that wants something more than a quick fuck? Straight couples my age have relationships, I just don't understand we as gay men can't have the same thing.."

    Oh yes, you can.

    *winks warmly*

    Straight people have better odds, roughly 10 times better than gays, which are a much smaller percentage of the population.

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    Jul 23, 2012 2:52 AM GMT
    Scruffypup saidYou can get a date online, but it can be much more difficult. I've found that most guys online (not all) seem to have some kind of social issue, which makes them gravitate towards casual sex rather than actual dating, regardless of what they might claim in their profile. Casual sex is much safer emotionally than a date, so those with fears of intimacy will get caught in that trap very easily. Try putting yourself out in the real world if you want real world dates.


    but how do i do that? I'm not out yet, so that why I'm online...and I'm not socially awkward at all, but the only guys, where I am, that are OUT are usually not my type and tend to be into the gay "femme" scene. Nothing wrong with that, just not my type of dude.

    u suggest hitting on guys at the gym? I try but i having confidence but I'm still getting the balls to do it
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    Jul 23, 2012 2:57 AM GMT
    cmcclend said

    u suggest hitting on guys at the gym? I try but i having confidence but I'm still getting the balls to do it


    No.

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    Ycyl.jpg
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    Jul 23, 2012 2:57 AM GMT
    Allow me to direct you to another thread that should provide some insight:

    http://www.realjock.com/gayforums/2547896
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    Jul 23, 2012 3:21 AM GMT
    Firebrand saidWhy is this site so full of people desperate to have a relationship?! I honestly don't get it. I am in a great relationship now, but let me tell you the urge to have "guest stars" will soon become present for all parties involved.


    tumblr_lzvd6iq8XU1qe8xs7.gif
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    Jul 23, 2012 3:31 AM GMT
    cmcclend said
    Scruffypup saidYou can get a date online, but it can be much more difficult. I've found that most guys online (not all) seem to have some kind of social issue, which makes them gravitate towards casual sex rather than actual dating, regardless of what they might claim in their profile. Casual sex is much safer emotionally than a date, so those with fears of intimacy will get caught in that trap very easily. Try putting yourself out in the real world if you want real world dates.


    but how do i do that? I'm not out yet, so that why I'm online...and I'm not socially awkward at all, but the only guys, where I am, that are OUT are usually not my type and tend to be into the gay "femme" scene. Nothing wrong with that, just not my type of dude.

    u suggest hitting on guys at the gym? I try but i having confidence but I'm still getting the balls to do it



    I suggest getting out of the closet. That's your whole problem right there. There are lots of guys available but they'll never hit on you because you're essentially invisible as long as you're in the closet.
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    Jul 23, 2012 3:51 AM GMT
    Scruffypup said
    cmcclend said
    Scruffypup saidYou can get a date online, but it can be much more difficult. I've found that most guys online (not all) seem to have some kind of social issue, which makes them gravitate towards casual sex rather than actual dating, regardless of what they might claim in their profile. Casual sex is much safer emotionally than a date, so those with fears of intimacy will get caught in that trap very easily. Try putting yourself out in the real world if you want real world dates.


    but how do i do that? I'm not out yet, so that why I'm online...and I'm not socially awkward at all, but the only guys, where I am, that are OUT are usually not my type and tend to be into the gay "femme" scene. Nothing wrong with that, just not my type of dude.

    u suggest hitting on guys at the gym? I try but i having confidence but I'm still getting the balls to do it



    I suggest getting out of the closet. That's your whole problem right there. There are lots of guys available but they'll never hit on you because you're essentially invisible as long as you're in the closet.


    i just don't want people to treat me different...or think of me as weird...im on a gymnastics team, i don't want it to be awkward
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    Jul 23, 2012 3:58 AM GMT
    ^ It's awkward NOW. Just sayin...
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    Jul 23, 2012 4:06 AM GMT
    cmcclend saidWhy don't most young gay men want to just go on a date or be in a relationship? Is it so hard to find a muscle stud thats handsome that DOESNT want to just have sex and bounce??

    #luckybastardproblems
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    Jul 23, 2012 4:44 AM GMT
    coz no string sex is fun,and to ask a man(gay or stricon_cool.gif to stuck with a tree instead of playing around in the forest,which one will he prefer?Especially he is young,horny,ernegetic,rich and attractive.Family doesnt seem like first priority after all.icon_confused.gif
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    Jul 23, 2012 5:45 AM GMT
    A muscle stud that's handsome?

    That's a whole lot of good-lookin'.
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    Jul 23, 2012 10:08 PM GMT
    cmcclend said
    Scruffypup said
    cmcclend said
    Scruffypup saidYou can get a date online, but it can be much more difficult. I've found that most guys online (not all) seem to have some kind of social issue, which makes them gravitate towards casual sex rather than actual dating, regardless of what they might claim in their profile. Casual sex is much safer emotionally than a date, so those with fears of intimacy will get caught in that trap very easily. Try putting yourself out in the real world if you want real world dates.


    but how do i do that? I'm not out yet, so that why I'm online...and I'm not socially awkward at all, but the only guys, where I am, that are OUT are usually not my type and tend to be into the gay "femme" scene. Nothing wrong with that, just not my type of dude.

    u suggest hitting on guys at the gym? I try but i having confidence but I'm still getting the balls to do it



    I suggest getting out of the closet. That's your whole problem right there. There are lots of guys available but they'll never hit on you because you're essentially invisible as long as you're in the closet.


    i just don't want people to treat me different...or think of me as weird...im on a gymnastics team, i don't want it to be awkward



    You're projecting. No one is going to think you're "weird" unless you act "weird". Just act like you always have but throw in some honesty. It will make you much more attractive and likable. Plus, you can't live your life based on others. Such a turnoff!
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    Jul 23, 2012 10:08 PM GMT
    I do, but you're not my type.
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    Jul 23, 2012 10:13 PM GMT
    There it is... standards. Standards too high.
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    Jul 23, 2012 10:16 PM GMT
    because the internet is an awful way to meet someone, well someone who isnt fraudulant in either thier intentions or descriptions posts etc.

    try meeting actual people, and having a conversation with actual spoken words, i dunno could be totally wrong

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    Jul 23, 2012 10:19 PM GMT
    7Famark saidI do, but you're not my type.


    Wuzzat rayciss?

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    Jul 23, 2012 10:19 PM GMT
    I am so glad I am not muscular and good looking... It's such a distraction.
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    Jul 23, 2012 10:20 PM GMT
    Go watch The Adonis Factor. Not that I'm part of that group or would know anything about it but from the outside looking in I can see a lot of it being true.

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    Jul 23, 2012 10:21 PM GMT
    oh and also because you look like sex
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    Jul 23, 2012 10:27 PM GMT
    i want to experience different nationalities and if i try it all, its time to settle down..
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    Jul 23, 2012 10:29 PM GMT
    Yeah the internet can leave you feeling disillusioned, but there isn't much to say for meeting in public either in common gay places. Its just face to face disillusion. Too many good looking men are just fucked up in the head and treat sex like a sport because they are dead inside and lack the value of true bonding & intimacy.