Jul 24, 2012 4:07 AM GMT
in all the years of all my dealings, not only have I lost my patience but I have reached what is my beyond my limit. I do know what I want but I no longer care to share it with anyone else. All I know is that I am not the issue. So I've stepped out of the "dating pool", dried off & have considered taking up another course: A selfish phase, I finished school within a week of turning 31, by myself; for the most part (with the exception of having a few family members & those-alike in my corner, cheering me on), I had to realise just how materialistic & shallow guys can be. When I was down & out, they didn't want to be bothered with me & when I had a little paper in my account(s) & kept a decent ride, all of a sudden, they wanted to be all over me like some cheap sluts.
To me, it has gotten to the point where people do want to meet up, expecting something out of it, which leads me to believe that the process will only become more and more fruitless for me. I don't mind having time to spare and doing nothing with it, but I certainly don't like wasting it on a bunch of gold-diggin', plastic or materialistic guys or guys who are just about no one but themselves. Speaking of which, if I take up this selfish phase, would I become anything like the guys who have b'sed, burned, dissed, dogged, lied to, cheated on me? I mean, there's only hurt if there's feelings & time involved. There is an upside...I don't have to worry about being hurt or heartbroken & since I'm doing bad by myself, I figure, I might as well enjoy the rewards by myself (already gettin' ΒΌ of the way there). I do not have the time to decipher whether a guy is into me for me, as I am or if he's looking to get into my pockets.
I'm sure some of you will say, "You're too young to be making that kind of decision, give it time. The right guy will come along & love you for you. Not all guys are the same." I have heard it all before & the more I hear it, the more of a headache it gives me. The number of times it takes with guys is enough to count on one hand, literally.
This is a good beating heart of mine & I am trying to keep it from turning to stone (yes, I do have one) but at the same time, I just refuse to put up with it getting played. Should I go ahead, throw in the towel & consider this phase? (if you cannot read it in any other colour, please do not make the effort to respond)
To me, it has gotten to the point where people do want to meet up, expecting something out of it, which leads me to believe that the process will only become more and more fruitless for me. I don't mind having time to spare and doing nothing with it, but I certainly don't like wasting it on a bunch of gold-diggin', plastic or materialistic guys or guys who are just about no one but themselves. Speaking of which, if I take up this selfish phase, would I become anything like the guys who have b'sed, burned, dissed, dogged, lied to, cheated on me? I mean, there's only hurt if there's feelings & time involved. There is an upside...I don't have to worry about being hurt or heartbroken & since I'm doing bad by myself, I figure, I might as well enjoy the rewards by myself (already gettin' ΒΌ of the way there). I do not have the time to decipher whether a guy is into me for me, as I am or if he's looking to get into my pockets.
I'm sure some of you will say, "You're too young to be making that kind of decision, give it time. The right guy will come along & love you for you. Not all guys are the same." I have heard it all before & the more I hear it, the more of a headache it gives me. The number of times it takes with guys is enough to count on one hand, literally.
This is a good beating heart of mine & I am trying to keep it from turning to stone (yes, I do have one) but at the same time, I just refuse to put up with it getting played. Should I go ahead, throw in the towel & consider this phase? (if you cannot read it in any other colour, please do not make the effort to respond)
