This is odd...

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 24, 2012 6:09 PM GMT
    anyone have similar experiences when it comes to men and dating? I use to approach the concept of dating with politeness..typical nice guy attitude and i got nowhere with guys...but i just got fed up one day and started treating men like shit....and to my surprise these same prospective guys who i was interested in for dating or more purposes...liked that i was treating them horribly. Why is that? I couldn't get leeway when i was proper and treated them with respect, but when i started being an utter asshole your now in-love? I dont get it and its baffling me.
  • HottJoe

    Posts: 21366

    Jul 24, 2012 6:11 PM GMT
    Men like the chase. They probably see you as hard-to-get now.
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    Jul 24, 2012 6:14 PM GMT
    Interesting experience. I haven't done it. But if anyone is an asshole or indifferent towards me, I quickly lose all interest in him. I pay careful attention to someones actions and don't reward bad behavior.
  • AMoonHawk

    Posts: 11406

    Jul 24, 2012 6:16 PM GMT
    Most guys don't like a guy who seems to be dolting ... so if your being nice didn't work, it is probably because you were appearing to be to needy and clingy
  • Darkjeono

    Posts: 12

    Jul 24, 2012 7:24 PM GMT
    All the gay males have a chip in their minds (from early childhood) of rejection (even those who are openly gay, unconsciosly they always be feeling the rejection, cause anyone who is gay must be rejected at some point of their lives for the matter of being gay) so, when you treat them bad they seem to understand that you are the one cause you're rejecting them, it's weird but that's why nice guys always finish last. that "hard to get" it's a cliché.

    and also gay people (mayority of them) tend to search for Prince Charming, and they have so strong expectations that when a regular guy comes in, they reject the idea of losing the chance of meeting Prince Charming, so they prefer to be single in order to have that chance.
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    Jul 24, 2012 7:59 PM GMT
    Darkjo saidAll the gay males have a chip in their minds (from early childhood) of rejection (even those who are openly gay, unconsciosly they always be feeling the rejection, cause anyone who is gay must be rejected at some point of their lives for the matter of being gay) so, when you treat them bad they seem to understand that you are the one cause you're rejecting them, it's weird but that's why nice guys always finish last. that "hard to get" it's a cliché.

    and also gay people (mayority of them) tend to search for Prince Charming, and they have so strong expectations that when a regular guy comes in, they reject the idea of losing the chance of meeting Prince Charming, so they prefer to be single in order to have that chance.


    In addition:

    All gay men have track lightin'. And all gay men are named Mark, Rick, or Steve.

    Now you know everything you need to know about all gay men!icon_rolleyes.gif
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    Jul 24, 2012 8:01 PM GMT
    both methods are useless and your relationships will suck. Sorry but neither methods will work for you.
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    Jul 24, 2012 8:01 PM GMT
    or maybe you were just dating the wrong people.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 24, 2012 8:08 PM GMT
    Is it really worth becoming emotionally manipulative to get a date?
    Surly it's worth holding out till you find a guy who is genuinely interested in you for you. Otherwise you will be to afraid to treat him properly later on in the relationship.

    Of course this all depends on what your definition of treating good vs treating mean is. You should strive to treat them like a normal person would.
  • LJay

    Posts: 11612

    Jul 24, 2012 8:10 PM GMT
    AMoonHawk saidMost guys don't like a guy who seems to be dolting ... so if your being nice didn't work, it is probably because you were appearing to be to needy and clingy


    I think you mean doting, but dolting is a syndrome I seem to come upon a lot.
  • AMoonHawk

    Posts: 11406

    Jul 24, 2012 8:37 PM GMT
    LJay said
    AMoonHawk saidMost guys don't like a guy who seems to be dolting ... so if your being nice didn't work, it is probably because you were appearing to be to needy and clingy


    I think you mean doting, but dolting is a syndrome I seem to come upon a lot.

    You're right ... but either can be used, as to be dolting, would be acting dumb. While doting would mean more like hoovering over someone; which you are not going to get to do unless you are with them over an extensive period of time.
    Basically, guys like guys that are sure of themselves - except in master/submissive relationships
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    Jul 24, 2012 9:40 PM GMT
    That's pretty sad..
    I'm trying to profile the type of guys that would fall for that kind of behaviour!
    It's like saying.."You Beat Me ... And I'll Love You Forever"...
    Wow!!
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    Jul 24, 2012 9:54 PM GMT
    Anocxu saidThat's pretty sad..
    I'm trying to profile the type of guys that would fall for that kind of behaviour!
    It's like saying.."You Beat Me ... And I'll Love You Forever"...
    Wow!!
    I'm looking for that... but I'm at the point where I need to believe that is going to happy; if and when its possible. I can't handle too much reality in it myself right now.
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    Jul 25, 2012 12:42 AM GMT
    Anocxu saidThat's pretty sad..
    I'm trying to profile the type of guys that would fall for that kind of behaviour!
    It's like saying.."You Beat Me ... And I'll Love You Forever"...
    Wow!!


    its still a surprise to me...and that is why i present the question as i find it hard to believe that one must resort to being a dick to get someone interested. Maybe it true what they say of "the bad boy syndrome". You want a bad boy..because you want the challenge of changing him.
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    Jul 25, 2012 12:45 AM GMT
    tereseus1 said
    Anocxu saidThat's pretty sad..
    I'm trying to profile the type of guys that would fall for that kind of behaviour!
    It's like saying.."You Beat Me ... And I'll Love You Forever"...
    Wow!!


    its still a surprise to me...and that is why i present the question as i find it hard to believe that one must resort to being a dick to get someone interested. Maybe it true what they say of "the bad boy syndrome". You want a bad boy..because you want the challenge of changing him.


    not for me. not at all.

    i wouldnt very well be concerned with changing someone if i were interested in him. i think quite the opposite should be true.

    i love to be romanced and nothing impresses me more than manners and genuine interest in conversation etc.

    but thats just me and i havent dated in 3 years so what would i know
  • Trepeat

    Posts: 546

    Jul 25, 2012 2:57 PM GMT
    I suppose it's a good strategy if you want to find the BDSM sub types.
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    Jul 25, 2012 3:18 PM GMT
    I'm really curious what exactly it is you do to be a dick to them. K
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 25, 2012 3:22 PM GMT
    I have they experience too. If I appear interested, I sense they are hesitant but if I'm indifferent or short with them they persist. Makes it difficult for me to communicate or get anywhere with guys being myself. I mean when I was single anyway. I notice it with my partner too, if I'm off on my own world the more attention he wants. But when I crave it he's too busy. Can't synchronize.
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    Jul 25, 2012 3:23 PM GMT
    they = that