How do you deal with family members that would vote away your civil rights?

  • metta

    Posts: 39159

    Jul 25, 2012 12:30 AM GMT
    Do you not discuss it, ignore it,debate it? Does the relationship suffer because of it? Do you feel as close to them? Do you avoid them?


    On Loving My Republican Brother Who Loves Me

    http://www.autostraddle.com/on-loving-my-republican-brother-who-loves-me-142110/#comment-223815
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    Jul 25, 2012 12:49 AM GMT
    4 years ago they got cut out of my life permanently. They exist no more.
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    Jul 25, 2012 1:09 AM GMT
    My Mom is anti-gay, but she's become disillusioned with politics. So, that's one less vote if an anti-gay marriage ballot measure ever came up here in Indiana.
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    Jul 25, 2012 3:34 AM GMT
    I am gay and believe the issue of gay marriage like abortion,the death penalty and almost all others except those in the Bill of Rights belong to voters at the ballot box.So to answer your question I deal with myself well lolicon_smile.gif
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    Jul 25, 2012 3:43 AM GMT
    at the end of the day it is a difference of opinion. Yeah it seems unfair, but people have the right to believe what they believe in. It does not make them wrong for not conforming to our way of thinking. It sucks...so much, but still we can't be hypocrites about it.

    Me and my dad...are close but not close as we should be, so yeah it does suffer but I acknowledge him as being different from me and that is ok.
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    Jul 25, 2012 3:48 AM GMT
    Tolerance goes both ways, it's not just they should allow us to get married, but we should be tolerant of the fact that they are perfectly entitled to be bigoted. Popular vote hardly ever favors the minoritty; that's why we have the judiciary, to protect the rights that the majority oppresses.

    Let friends and family vote as they see fit, open the line of communication, and let the courts take on the drama.
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    Jul 25, 2012 3:50 AM GMT
    As conservative as my parents are they wouldn't vote against marriage equality, they would vote in favor of it because of me. Still will vote for anti-marriage equality politicians though haha
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    Jul 25, 2012 4:05 AM GMT
    Its kinda the same way we deal with our gay republican friends who vote against their own as well as our interests. We can try to explain that they are partnering up with our sworn enemies, but they just don't get it !! The saying is that; Ignorance is bliss. but I'm not sure about willful ignorance though. it may be more 'pathetic' than blissfull. LOL
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    Jul 25, 2012 5:50 AM GMT
    Tell them to go fuck themselves.
  • groundcombat

    Posts: 945

    Jul 25, 2012 5:53 AM GMT
    Occasionally I get into fruitless arguments with them about it but most of the time I ignore it like I do their other imperfections.
  • Pyre85

    Posts: 213

    Jul 25, 2012 5:59 AM GMT
    My family is comprised almost entirely of Jehovah's Witnesses.
    I dealt by hiding at first. I buried every gay tendency, adopted a homophobic attitude, and got so into it I almost lost myself.
    When I was nineteen I moved in with my half brother, one of the most accepting and supportive people I ever met, but was so self repressed that it took alchohol poisoning and a something that bordered on interrogation-loving mind you- to drag the truth past my lips.
    A drunken email is how my parents found out, followed by years of shunning- uninvited from my brothers wedding, disowned by my uncle and his family (who were as close if not closer than my own siblings and parents)
    Now my mother is still trying to convert me (poor girl buys into the religion hook line and sinker and is honest to goodness trying to save her babies soul) And has gone as far as to add me on facebook. Now I just let taht be her window in on my life. I censor nothing, she has full access to my friends and posts. Maybe, just maybe shell see that my life and my love is not something abhorrent, but something just as good, pure and holy- perhaps more so- than some Witness peoples.

  • waccamatt

    Posts: 1918

    Jul 25, 2012 6:11 AM GMT
    I'm lucky that I come from a liberal family, but my mom didn't react well when I first came out. At the time I established the fact that either my boyfriend at the time was welcome at every function with me or I would not attend. My dad and my oldest brother have always been fine and my other brother kind of just ignores it. My personality is such that they either accept me as I am or I'll spend my time elsewhere. Life is too short to spend time with people who don't accept you as you are.
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    Jul 25, 2012 6:53 AM GMT
    It's their vote and their right to use it how ever they wish too. What right do any of us have to dictate to, and bully another how to vote; such things happen under a dictatorship, not a democracy. They can vote however they wish, as will I. But I have the acceptance of my husband and he I, so who cares what anyone else thinks; acceptance starts from within.
  • Karl

    Posts: 5787

    Jul 25, 2012 7:04 AM GMT
    they cant change my mind....
    My mom thought I was kidding her when I came out, then she kept silent for a month.
    Last week she asked me to go to die.
    I just ignored her because I know she couldnt do anything to me.
    She'll accept who I am soon.
    The best choice of mine here is keep being quiet and dont mention to this much.