Finally rebuilt my life.... only took 3 years!

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    Jul 25, 2012 3:50 AM GMT
    12 year breakup, ex destroyed me financially, drained the accounts and liquidated eveything while I was away on business for 6 months etc blah blah... pretty much left me bankrupt and seriously almost homeless.. went from a fleet of cars to a 1999 Camry lol.. I struggled for about a year to just put food on the table... that bad.. I forgave him, focused on my job, moved and now I've got a pretty cool life.. I'm damn proud of my 06 mazda, might just buy a new car next month.. then again I've learned to appreciate what I have not what I once had.. awesome new set of friends!! Killer job with a ultra progressive company , Finally started looking around at dating and BAM meet a guy that is rockin my world ... you know, I just feel content and happy..
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    Jul 25, 2012 3:53 AM GMT
    That is such awesome news, man! I'm really happy that things are going well for you, as it sounds like you've been going through a lot! Thanks for sharing with us icon_smile.gif

    Keep on keeping on,

    Josh
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    Jul 25, 2012 3:54 AM GMT
    hell yeah man. Good to hear. Sometimes life is shit, sometimes it's awesome and the awesome times are what makes it worth living.

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    Jul 25, 2012 4:32 AM GMT
    Wow. I applaud you for not strangling your ex. Congrats on the rebound and hope you continue on the road to success. icon_cool.gif
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    Jul 25, 2012 4:41 AM GMT
    Good for you!!! My ex was also an ass to me after the break up. But things are looking better for me. I learned the only person you can depend on is yourself, so there is no time to have a pity party. Now, I'm in a much better stage of my life. I def. know how you are feeling right now. Keep your head up!!!
  • AMoonHawk

    Posts: 11406

    Jul 25, 2012 5:23 AM GMT
    Excellent ... Good Vibes comin' your way
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    Jul 25, 2012 5:50 AM GMT
    Honestly it was part my fault for not paying attention and allowing it to happen. . hardest part was sending the text "I forgive you and wish you the best" with sincerity... &;^#]^hole... lol...
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    Jul 25, 2012 6:24 AM GMT
    shortmuscleguy saidHonestly it was part my fault for not paying attention and allowing it to happen. . hardest part was sending the text "I forgive you and wish you the best" with sincerity... &;^#]^hole... lol...


    Once you forgive them, there's peace and you can move on. Congrats to you!
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    Jul 25, 2012 12:02 PM GMT
    Date me shortmusclegy!!..date me !!!..at least i'd be man enough to stick right by your side...while i'm robbing you blind...icon_biggrin.gif
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    Jul 25, 2012 1:19 PM GMT
    Congratulations and all. Just one question: where were you for 6 months that you couldn't monitor your finances? I routinely go to places like Afghanistan and South Sudan where connectivity to the outside world is not the best and I still get plenty of messages regarding my bank account and such.
  • CuriousJockAZ

    Posts: 19136

    Jul 25, 2012 1:51 PM GMT
    What a positive example of someone who fell into an abyss only to climb out and be back on top of the world. I have no doubt that karma will one day come and give that ex of yours a good swift kick in the ass, if it hasn't already, and he won't know what hit him.
  • ATXnative

    Posts: 240

    Jul 25, 2012 2:07 PM GMT
    jmusmc85 saidGood for you!!! My ex was also an ass to me after the break up. But things are looking better for me. I learned the only person you can depend on is yourself, so there is no time to have a pity party. Now, I'm in a much better stage of my life. I def. know how you are feeling right now. Keep your head up!!!


    "I will sell this house TODAY."
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    Jul 25, 2012 2:10 PM GMT
    shortmuscleguy saidHonestly it was part my fault for not paying attention and allowing it to happen. . hardest part was sending the text "I forgive you and wish you the best" with sincerity... &;^#]^hole... lol...


    why even bother sending that text in the first place? Does ur ex even care to hear it lol?

    If I got a random text from my ex that said "I forgive you and wish you the best" id be like "ok".....thinking to myself "whatever, wtf is he texting me for?"

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    Jul 25, 2012 2:12 PM GMT
    np52td.jpg
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    Jul 25, 2012 3:16 PM GMT
    I would have murdered that ex and made it look like an accident. Just sayin..
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    Jul 25, 2012 3:21 PM GMT
    ATXnative said
    jmusmc85 saidGood for you!!! My ex was also an ass to me after the break up. But things are looking better for me. I learned the only person you can depend on is yourself, so there is no time to have a pity party. Now, I'm in a much better stage of my life. I def. know how you are feeling right now. Keep your head up!!!


    "I will sell this house TODAY."


    Huh?
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    Jul 25, 2012 3:30 PM GMT
    czarodziej saidI would have murdered that ex and made it look like an accident. Just sayin..


    original.jpg
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    Jul 25, 2012 3:31 PM GMT
    wow, you DEFINITELY bounced back and are standing proud now. Your resilience is inspiring! icon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gif
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    Jul 25, 2012 3:42 PM GMT
    Thanks for letting us read along while you try and convince yourself you're happy.

    http://www.amazon.com/The-Velvet-Rage-Overcoming-Straight/dp/0738210110

    Book Description
    Publication Date: May 24, 2005
    Whether he is flamboyantly fashionable with a body chiseled to perfection or chronically dissatisfied and without lasting relationships, the stereotypical extremes of male gay behavior are fueled by the same dark force: shame.The inevitable byproduct of growing up gay in a straight man’s world, the experience of shame in childhood and adolescence sends a boy the message that he is other and that he is worthless. To avoid feeling shameful later in life—and even after he is no longer explicitly shamed by his sexuality—a gay man will quietly rage against the memory of this message and strive to excel dramatically to prove it wrong. The stereotypical manifestation of this inner battle is a gay man’s success in the arts, fashion and in his body image; as with all the other forms of beauty, creativity and success, he is hiding behind the facades he creates.Building on the collected psychological research and the author’s own experience of the past twenty years, The Velvet Rage will help gay men profoundly understand their dichotomous extremes. Explaining the psychological underpinnings of the forces at play in their lives, it also offers helpful strategies to stop the insidious cycle of avoidance and rage. Empowering and validating, The Velvet Rage will influence the public discourse on gay culture and positively change the lives of gay men who read it.
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    Jul 25, 2012 4:02 PM GMT
    bearpster saidThanks for letting us read along while you try and convince yourself you're happy.

    http://www.amazon.com/The-Velvet-Rage-Overcoming-Straight/dp/0738210110

    Book Description
    Publication Date: May 24, 2005
    Whether he is flamboyantly fashionable with a body chiseled to perfection or chronically dissatisfied and without lasting relationships, the stereotypical extremes of male gay behavior are fueled by the same dark force: shame.The inevitable byproduct of growing up gay in a straight man’s world, the experience of shame in childhood and adolescence sends a boy the message that he is other and that he is worthless. To avoid feeling shameful later in life—and even after he is no longer explicitly shamed by his sexuality—a gay man will quietly rage against the memory of this message and strive to excel dramatically to prove it wrong. The stereotypical manifestation of this inner battle is a gay man’s success in the arts, fashion and in his body image; as with all the other forms of beauty, creativity and success, he is hiding behind the facades he creates.Building on the collected psychological research and the author’s own experience of the past twenty years, The Velvet Rage will help gay men profoundly understand their dichotomous extremes. Explaining the psychological underpinnings of the forces at play in their lives, it also offers helpful strategies to stop the insidious cycle of avoidance and rage. Empowering and validating, The Velvet Rage will influence the public discourse on gay culture and positively change the lives of gay men who read it.


    Rude. WTF does this have to do with shortmuscle's experience?
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    Jul 25, 2012 4:03 PM GMT
    Congrats on your rebuilding, shortmuscle. It says so much about your character.
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Jul 25, 2012 4:04 PM GMT
    Wow, first, interesting thread. Sorry to hear you had such a time with your ex.
    Kind of curious about a couple of things. He drained your bank accounts that were held in joint tenancy.. I assume you had property held jointly and cars as well? Hopefully you didn't have raid retirement accounts (albeit you could have yanked contributions from a Roth to have helped you out and the ex couldn't have laid a hand on it). Did you have to declare bankrupcy? Hope all is in good order now and hope your credit score didn't suffer to much as a result.

    I might not have been so quick to forgive... but glad you have put it behind you and are moving forward in a positive manner.. very important!

    icon_biggrin.gif
  • HottJoe

    Posts: 21366

    Jul 25, 2012 4:05 PM GMT
    ECnAZ said
    bearpster saidThanks for letting us read along while you try and convince yourself you're happy.

    http://www.amazon.com/The-Velvet-Rage-Overcoming-Straight/dp/0738210110

    Book Description
    Publication Date: May 24, 2005
    Whether he is flamboyantly fashionable with a body chiseled to perfection or chronically dissatisfied and without lasting relationships, the stereotypical extremes of male gay behavior are fueled by the same dark force: shame.The inevitable byproduct of growing up gay in a straight man’s world, the experience of shame in childhood and adolescence sends a boy the message that he is other and that he is worthless. To avoid feeling shameful later in life—and even after he is no longer explicitly shamed by his sexuality—a gay man will quietly rage against the memory of this message and strive to excel dramatically to prove it wrong. The stereotypical manifestation of this inner battle is a gay man’s success in the arts, fashion and in his body image; as with all the other forms of beauty, creativity and success, he is hiding behind the facades he creates.Building on the collected psychological research and the author’s own experience of the past twenty years, The Velvet Rage will help gay men profoundly understand their dichotomous extremes. Explaining the psychological underpinnings of the forces at play in their lives, it also offers helpful strategies to stop the insidious cycle of avoidance and rage. Empowering and validating, The Velvet Rage will influence the public discourse on gay culture and positively change the lives of gay men who read it.


    Rude. WTF does this have to do with shortmuscle's experience?


    Agreed. He seems to be projecting his insecurities on the rest of us with his shallow opinions of gay men.
  • d694485

    Posts: 222

    Jul 25, 2012 4:09 PM GMT
    Wow, good for you! I would have never forgave such a person. You sound like a pretty successful guy, and I hope you'll never have to go through this again. icon_smile.gif
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    Jul 25, 2012 4:10 PM GMT
    It's because short guys are strong and resilient. I should know. icon_wink.gif

    Congratulations for not letting life take you down. I'm always inspired by stories like this.