Love, Sex, Security

  • paulmc49255

    Posts: 1

    Jul 26, 2012 7:57 PM GMT
    Alright so I am at a stand still so I thought I would get others advice. I am 23 y/o and I had been a bottom my whole life. When I was 20, I was working out and I decided I was going to try to be a total top. I started dating a guy who was, as I am sure you can follow, a bottom. I quickly found out that I am just a power bottom or something. Aggressive but I just cant keep that ship hard. Our relationship advanced and he still wanted to be together so he wanted to be the top. I was fine at first but now it’s three years later and sex is almost non existent. I honestly just think he is a bottom at heart. But I don’t know. We fight all the time and I am always having to say, “I am sorry.” He is 4 years older than me. I am becoming emotionally drained and my patience with him is almost gone. Every help book or professional on Gay relationships say just stick together, but damn... I am 23 and have non passionate sex about every 2 months. When we go out to the clubs I get hit on on the time and I miss it. But then I think, the grass is always greener on the other side right? So what do you guys think? Should I stay with him, a well educated successful professional, or should I leave him due to the emotional toll its taking on me?
  • Tonyg

    Posts: 1

    Jun 06, 2016 2:58 PM GMT
    First what im about to say is not to be selfish. I have always believed that if your household has taken a turn for the worst physically and emotionally that perhaps you should look outside your domain and have a affair , even if its to be held and made love to by someone new then when done your head and heart will give you the answer. But you do have to do it completely. The kisses , the caressing, and the sex or else you cannot get the answers. If you like to talk ill be here my name is John and i will be glad to give my number to keep our talks private and if you want to hook up i am very discreet. Mo strings
  • Destinharbor

    Posts: 4433

    Jun 06, 2016 3:28 PM GMT
    I'm one of the first guys in the forums to always advocate that a couple stay together unless abuse is happening. But I have to say, it sounds like your relationship isn't working for either of you. Some guys get lucky in love early and some need to learn what it is that will make them happy. That's what our youth is supposed to be about. I'd try to get your guy talking honestly about his desires and needs and you two compare notes and take it from there. But honestly, you probably need to move on. Sorry. guy. I know how painful that can be. Good luck.
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    Jun 06, 2016 9:07 PM GMT
    You two just need a total top to come in every so often and have a three way. Or Maybe you could bring the third in as a permanent member of the household.
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    Jun 07, 2016 6:05 AM GMT
    OP had one (1) post four years ago. That ship has sailed.
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    Jun 07, 2016 2:25 PM GMT
    mindgarden saidOP had one (1) post four years ago. That ship has sailed.

    very good observation. Just put Tonyg on "Ignore".