.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 28, 2012 2:19 PM GMT
    Please let this thread die, it was a parody of another thread and served its purpose

    Honestly, I think they feel so bad about being gay, that they ape every heterosexual standard, just to prove to themselves how normal they are, down to the white picket fence and country club membership. They still want the best of both worlds. The truth is that if they could honestly admit to themselves that they want to run around screwing everybody else, there would be way more happy, long-term gay couples.

    Gay men tend to bail at the first sign of trouble, so cheating is often the end of the 'monogamous' relationship. After two or three of these relationships that end after a short time because of cheating, guys despair, realizing that many guys pay lip-service to monogamy only until a new dick comes around. Then it's back to being the dreaded 'single' for both of them, more jaded and more disease riddled than before, because the first thing they do in their relationships is to toss the condoms and cheating partners can bring home nasty souvenirs.

    After denying their desires for so long, they then hook-up as much as they can. They figure they aren’t straight and can’t marry so why act like it. Gay men are different after all…. why not just play with anyone who is willing? Until they realize they have become the gay stereotypes they hate so much, then declaring loudly, under much applause by other like-minded fuck-ups, to be done with hook-ups and look for their next monogamous relationship and so the vicious circle goes on and on.

    If only they could learn. Because a relationship is not about what you get out of it. Sex doesn’t add to your worth or value…however, being able to sustain a five or ten year partnership or more does. It makes you a better person and you grow up a lot. You accomplish things that single people don’t. You learn how to love through fights, jealousy, ex-boyfriends trying to break you up, mad parents, pissed off bosses. You learn that how you define yourself is tied to what you do and how you treat the people around you. These lessons can’t be learned while looking down their noses at other people's happy relationships.

    I think defaulting to monogamous relationships is destructive. The inability to hold onto a partner saps self-confidence and not living up to your own standards makes you feel like a loser.

    This is my version and I approve this message. (And I did not have to change much from the original text)
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    Jul 28, 2012 3:16 PM GMT


    Hmmmm...Humour me, if you will, while I add a preface in bold..

    "Some, (and depending on where you live, many) Gay men tend to bail at the first sign of trouble, so cheating is often the end of the 'monogamous' relationship. After two or three of these relationships that end after a short time because of cheating, guys despair, realizing that many guys pay lip-service to monogamy only until a new dick comes around. Then it's back to being the dreaded 'single' for both of them, more jaded and more disease riddled than before, because the first thing they do in their relationships is to toss the condoms and cheating partners can bring home nasty souvenirs.

    After denying their desires for so long, they then hook-up as much as they can. They figure they aren’t straight and can’t marry so why act like it. Gay men are different after all…. why not just play with anyone who is willing? Until they realize they have become the gay stereotypes they hate so much, then declaring loudly, under much applause by other like-minded fuck-ups, to be done with hook-ups and look for their next monogamous relationship and so the vicious circle goes on and on."


    icon_wink.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 28, 2012 3:37 PM GMT
    Not my text, I took it verbatim from the original here

    What do you think of this comment about open relationship?http://www.realjock.com/gayforums/2557027


    icon_wink.gif
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    Jul 28, 2012 3:50 PM GMT
    bhp91126 saidNot my text, I took it verbatim from the original here

    What do you think of this comment about open relationship?http://www.realjock.com/gayforums/2557027


    icon_wink.gif


    Oh I knew that, which is why a never said it was your words. icon_wink.gif

    While I agree with it, it doesn't tell the whole story.

    Here's what also happens:

    " Now here's a thought; just imagine how much fun being single would be if open relationship oriented guys, succumbing to the brow beating on here, for example, pretended they were into monogamy?
    Broken-heart city for a lot of guys looking for monogamy. All those open relationship guys trying to be something they aren't."

    ...quite frankly, if open relationship-ers and monogamists are allowed to openly be who they are without getting slagged, finding the right partner becomes much much much easier.

    And here's my usual refrain, if we celebrate each others' successes and mourn each others' failures rather than slap and scratch at each other with the weapons of nasty judgement the world in general becomes a happier place.

    warmly,

    -Doug
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 28, 2012 10:17 PM GMT
    I'm the first one to cheer on a happy couple and hope that they live happily ever after and I always feel sad for people when their relationship ends.

    What I can't stand is bigots, be they the religious, political or sexual kind.

    I don't think that the desire for monogamy or the desire for open relationships (for lack of a better word) is a conscious choice, but that our individual experiences throughout our lives shape the respective preferences in every one.

    So I don't understand why people think one form is superior to the other. It's not a race and the goal is individual happiness.
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    Jul 28, 2012 10:39 PM GMT
    We discussed this issue. We're both allowed to flirt, grab cock and ass, kiss, hug, even go so far as oral if we think it's do-able and we both agree the other can go ahead.

    I love my husband and want him to be happy and experience a full life. We agreed that anal sex was for US only and other things can be negotiated. Hey, if he's hot and we both want him, invite him home, we'll both have fun. If you want him to yourself or he wants you to himself, then we let the other know what's happening and when we'll be home. As long as we come home at the agreed upon time and we know where our other "half" is and what they're doing, we're fine with it if we both agreed.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 28, 2012 11:43 PM GMT
    yourname2000 saidSame tired old shit
    If you were a politician I'd expect you be caught in an airport mensroom doing the nasty real soon. Your rants border on pathological by now. If I gave a fuck I'd actually be worried. Did intensity69 86 you?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 28, 2012 11:50 PM GMT
    Daas saidWe discussed this issue. We're both allowed to flirt, grab cock and ass, kiss, hug, even go so far as oral if we think it's do-able and we both agree the other can go ahead.

    I love my husband and want him to be happy and experience a full life. We agreed that anal sex was for US only and other things can be negotiated. Hey, if he's hot and we both want him, invite him home, we'll both have fun. If you want him to yourself or he wants you to himself, then we let the other know what's happening and when we'll be home. As long as we come home at the agreed upon time and we know where our other "half" is and what they're doing, we're fine with it if we both agreed.
    Congrats, you guys seem to have found a compromise that works for both of you. Many happy years.
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    Jul 28, 2012 11:58 PM GMT
    rk2uH.jpg
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 29, 2012 12:10 AM GMT
    Yeah, I just don't care who you fuck. Stop complaining already.
  • Timbales

    Posts: 13993

    Jul 29, 2012 12:16 AM GMT
    Gays judging other gays for being monogamous is just like religious people judging gays for being gay.

    How about everyone just stop worrying what other people are doing and mind their own business?
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    Jul 29, 2012 12:18 AM GMT
    smartmoney saidYeah, I just don't care who you fuck. Stop complaining already.
    Who's complaining? icon_rolleyes.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 29, 2012 12:21 AM GMT
    Timbales saidGays judging other gays for being monogamous is just like religious people judging gays for being gay.

    How about everyone just stop worrying what other people are doing and mind their own business?

    Monogamous gays complaining they are being judged is like the religious right complaining religious freedom is under attack in the US icon_evil.gif
  • Timbales

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    Jul 29, 2012 12:22 AM GMT
    bhp91126 said
    Timbales saidGays judging other gays for being monogamous is just like religious people judging gays for being gay.

    How about everyone just stop worrying what other people are doing and mind their own business?

    Monogamous gays complaining they are being judged is like the religious right complaining religious freedom is under attack in the US icon_evil.gif


    who is complaining?
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    Jul 29, 2012 12:35 AM GMT
    Timbales saidGays judging other gays for being monogamous is just like religious people judging gays for being gay.

    How about everyone just stop worrying what other people are doing and mind their own business?

    In a round about way of saying it, I think that is his point. This is a parody of a thread criticizing those in open relationships, just one of many here judging those in open relationships or those who choose not to be in a relationship at all and just hook up. So the real question is, why do those threads keep coming up? If you don't want to be in an open relationship, don't be in one. I don't want to be in one and I am not, but what other people do in their private lives does not affect me.


    And OP, I get your reason for this thread, but really all you've done is provide another forum for some to pass judgment on what other people do in their bedroom. Why they are so concerned about it, I have no idea, but they are.
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    Jul 29, 2012 12:57 AM GMT
    Iceblink said....

    And OP, I get your reason for this thread, but really all you've done is provide another forum for some to pass judgment on what other people do in their bedroom. Why they are so concerned about it, I have no idea, but they are.
    In all honesty, in my 5 years on here I do not remember any thread judging monogamous couples, but, as you said, many judging open relationships. I think, so far this thread has been rather successful and not led to any judgment (except from yourname, but he's not really serious). It's usually the monoga-posse judging others.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 29, 2012 1:05 AM GMT
    This is like a big fat theoretical discussion to me. First, ya gotta find someone who you like and likes you back enough to get the ball rolling long enough.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 29, 2012 1:14 AM GMT
    Caslon20000 saidThis is like a big fat theoretical discussion to me. First, ya gotta find someone who you like and likes you back enough to get the ball rolling long enough.

    When has that ever stopped any gay man from being judgmental? icon_biggrin.gif

    homo ergo judge
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 29, 2012 1:27 AM GMT
    bhp91126 said
    Iceblink said....

    And OP, I get your reason for this thread, but really all you've done is provide another forum for some to pass judgment on what other people do in their bedroom. Why they are so concerned about it, I have no idea, but they are.
    In all honesty, in my 5 years on here I do not remember any thread judging monogamous couples, but, as you said, many judging open relationships. I think, so far this thread has been rather successful and not led to any judgment (except from yourname, but he's not really serious). It's usually the monoga-posse judging others.

    Not much judgment yet, but you know it is coming. If the leader of the monoga-posse (and I think you know who I am talking about) sees this thread, you know he will not let the opportunity pass to start judging.
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    Jul 29, 2012 1:35 AM GMT
    bhp91126 saidHonestly, I think they feel so bad about being gay, that they ape every heterosexual standard, just to prove to themselves how normal they are, down to the white picket fence and country club membership. They still want the best of both worlds. The truth is that if they could honestly admit to themselves that they want to run around screwing everybody else, there would be way more happy, long-term gay couples.

    Gay men tend to bail at the first sign of trouble, so cheating is often the end of the 'monogamous' relationship. After two or three of these relationships that end after a short time because of cheating, guys despair, realizing that many guys pay lip-service to monogamy only until a new dick comes around. Then it's back to being the dreaded 'single' for both of them, more jaded and more disease riddled than before, because the first thing they do in their relationships is to toss the condoms and cheating partners can bring home nasty souvenirs.

    After denying their desires for so long, they then hook-up as much as they can. They figure they aren’t straight and can’t marry so why act like it. Gay men are different after all…. why not just play with anyone who is willing? Until they realize they have become the gay stereotypes they hate so much, then declaring loudly, under much applause by other like-minded fuck-ups, to be done with hook-ups and look for their next monogamous relationship and so the vicious circle goes on and on.

    If only they could learn. Because a relationship is not about what you get out of it. Sex doesn’t add to your worth or value…however, being able to sustain a five or ten year partnership or more does. It makes you a better person and you grow up a lot. You accomplish things that single people don’t. You learn how to love through fights, jealousy, ex-boyfriends trying to break you up, mad parents, pissed off bosses. You learn that how you define yourself is tied to what you do and how you treat the people around you. These lessons can’t be learned while looking down their noses at other people's happy relationships.

    I think defaulting to monogamous relationships is destructive. The inability to hold onto a partner saps self-confidence and not living up to your own standards makes you feel like a loser.

    This is my version and I approve this message. (And I did not have to change much from the original text)


    your entire post sounds jaded...
    why do you care so much what other people think about you and your open relationship or whatever you have? Just brush it all off, man.
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    Jul 29, 2012 1:58 AM GMT
    bhp91126 said
    Iceblink said....

    And OP, I get your reason for this thread, but really all you've done is provide another forum for some to pass judgment on what other people do in their bedroom. Why they are so concerned about it, I have no idea, but they are.
    In all honesty, in my 5 years on here I do not remember any thread judging monogamous couples, but, as you said, many judging open relationships.
    http://assets5.rjstatic.com/images/global/icon_eek.gif


    lol, you missed a recent doozy of a topic started to slam-the-monogamous by firebrand. icon_wink.gif When we first arrived here we were called unicorns.

    It all depends on who has a bee in their bonnet, pee in their corn flakes, toast dropped on the buttered side or a splintery hockey stick up their ass on any given day.
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    Jul 29, 2012 2:30 AM GMT
    k3l3k0 said

    your entire post sounds jaded...
    why do you care so much what other people think about you and your open relationship or whatever you have? Just brush it all off, man.

    icon_lol.gif
    I don't give a rat's ass what anybody thinks about my relationship, but I'm doing it for the children. To show them that they have options besides monogamy or wanton sluts.
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    Jul 29, 2012 2:33 AM GMT
    meninlove said

    lol, you missed a recent doozy of a topic started to slam-the-monogamous by firebrand.

    Ouch, now that you remind me it's all coming back to me now. He's been pissing into the wind for a while now on here.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 29, 2012 3:11 AM GMT
    bhp91126 said
    meninlove said

    lol, you missed a recent doozy of a topic started to slam-the-monogamous by firebrand.

    Ouch, now that you remind me it's all coming back to me now. He's been pissing into the wind for a while now on here.


    ..and you know what that means...wet pants!

    icon_wink.gif


    x and o -Doug
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 29, 2012 4:19 AM GMT
    I can honestly say that once I'm with someone then they have me completely. I know that I WON'T ever cheat on someone I'm with...very proud to admit this.