Men: Gay Bars/clubs Vs Straight Bars/clubs

  • Madmuscle

    Posts: 39

    Aug 05, 2012 10:05 PM GMT
    Hey guys!

    I have noticed that in straight club or bars a male is more likely to go up to girl and start a conversation. Whereas, In a Gay bar/club. I dont find guys do that or hit on other guys?

    Am I mistaken?
  • AMoonHawk

    Posts: 11406

    Aug 05, 2012 10:10 PM GMT
    You are correct
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    Aug 05, 2012 11:04 PM GMT
    Sounds about right, some gays dont take rejection very well and either get

    a) bitchy and diva-ish where they get this attitude that all of a sudden you arent worth their time or whatever

    b) curl up into a ball and think the rest of the world is going to reject them

    c) or RARELY will they just shrug their shoulders and move along
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    Aug 05, 2012 11:06 PM GMT
    I've been kissed and felt up by strangers...and yes conversations have been started.

    Even when I bring female friends lesbians hit on them so I haven't noticed what you are talking about.
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    Aug 06, 2012 1:49 AM GMT
    Wait, so are you saying if I go to a straight club, I could go up to a guy and hit on him whereas a gay club this won't work?

    I went to the gay bar last night for the first time in a year, went up to a guy who was standing by himself against the wall, chatted him up nicely for half an hour, and then we went our separate ways after exchanging numbers. It was fun, and I want to do it again next weekend (but this time I'll bring my discreet earplugs so I don't lose my hearing from the "music" *noise* --no one notices I wear them anyways, and if he cares, he can go fuck himself! *dainty 1950s homely smile*

    However, it is intimidating to go up to other guys who are in groups. It is fine if you come to the bar with someone, but that is basically saying "hey I'm taken" or "don't approach me" if I'm out solo. It takes mega balls to go up to a group of people. Maybe yall should spread out if you want to meet new people.
  • HottJoe

    Posts: 21366

    Aug 06, 2012 1:51 AM GMT
    Not in my experience. Not with booze and shirtless guys on the dance floor.icon_biggrin.gif
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    Aug 06, 2012 1:56 AM GMT
    bluey2223 saidWait, so are you saying if I go to a straight club, I could go up to a guy and hit on him whereas a gay club this won't work?

    I went to the gay bar last night for the first time in a year, went up to a guy who was standing by himself against the wall, chatted him up nicely for half an hour, and then we went our separate ways after exchanging numbers. It was fun, and I want to do it again next weekend (but this time I'll bring my discreet earplugs so I don't lose my hearing from the "music" *noise* --no one notices I wear them anyways, and if he cares, he can go fuck himself! *dainty 1950s homely smile*

    However, it is intimidating to go up to other guys who are in groups. It is fine if you come to the bar with someone, but that is basically saying "hey I'm taken" or "don't approach me" if I'm out solo. It takes mega balls to go up to a group of people. Maybe yall should spread out if you want to meet new people.


    I've yet to go to a gay bar, but my friend has told me to go alone as well. I was going to go w/ someone for support but I want to meet folks, so I guess I should man up and go solo.
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    Aug 06, 2012 1:57 AM GMT
    Are gay men's ego's more fragile than straight men's?
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    Aug 06, 2012 1:59 AM GMT
    I actually went to a gay bar for the first time alone the other night. I was really nervous and wasn't sure if it was weird to go alone. But it wasn't long before I had guys coming and trying to get to know me. Which rarely happens when I'm with others. I'll go to gay bars alone more often now that I know it's fun to do!
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    Aug 06, 2012 2:00 AM GMT
    [quote][cite]bluey2223 said[/cite]
    (but this time I'll bring my discreet earplugs so I don't lose my hearing from the "music" *noise* --no one notices I wear them anyways, and if he cares, he can go fuck himself! *dainty 1950s homely smile*


    Genius! Totally finding myself some sort of no-show earplugs.
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    Aug 06, 2012 2:04 AM GMT
    Boomm18 saidI actually went to a gay bar for the first time alone the other night. I was really nervous and wasn't sure if it was weird to go alone. But it wasn't long before I had guys coming and trying to get to know me. Which rarely happens when I'm with others. I'll go to gay bars alone more often now that I know it's fun to do!


    Good to know. I'll have to overcome inertia and make a drive down to downtown one of these days...I live in the 'burbs.
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    Aug 06, 2012 2:07 AM GMT
    Jay1922 saidAre gay men's ego's more fragile than straight men's?

    This is a rhetorical question, right?
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    Aug 06, 2012 2:10 AM GMT
    active_athlete said
    Boomm18 saidI actually went to a gay bar for the first time alone the other night. I was really nervous and wasn't sure if it was weird to go alone. But it wasn't long before I had guys coming and trying to get to know me. Which rarely happens when I'm with others. I'll go to gay bars alone more often now that I know it's fun to do!


    Good to know. I'll have to overcome inertia and make a drive down to downtown one of these days...I live in the 'burbs.


    I live in the burbs too, but am really lucky to have a good gay bar/club about 15 mins from where I live! Without having to drive in the city!
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    Aug 06, 2012 2:11 AM GMT
    ha. when i'm at gay bars, i only get hit on my the desperate guy. ;) but usually i'd agree with this assessment. i don't really approach guys though because i usually can't feel attracted to a guy until i discern he's reasonably intelligent
  • Havenjock80

    Posts: 428

    Aug 06, 2012 2:11 AM GMT
    really its the other way around for me well at least for miami.. guys are always trying to hook up like horny dogs... and drunk... gay ones .but i guess its where u live.
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    Aug 06, 2012 2:14 AM GMT
    closer85 saidha. when i'm at gay bars, i only get hit on my the desperate guy. ;) but usually i'd agree with this assessment. i don't really approach guys though because i usually can't feel attracted to a guy until i discern he's reasonably intelligent

    It seems to me like 80% of the guys at gay bars are the desperate guys.
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    Aug 06, 2012 2:20 AM GMT
    HotYoga said[quote][cite]bluey2223 said[/cite]
    (but this time I'll bring my discreet earplugs so I don't lose my hearing from the "music" *noise* --no one notices I wear them anyways, and if he cares, he can go fuck himself! *dainty 1950s homely smile*


    Genius! Totally finding myself some sort of no-show earplugs.


    My Aunt who is an AuD audiologist sent me some called Etymotic Research musician's earplugs. Definitely recommend. I can model them on cam if interested and show you that you can't see them unless you are making an effort to lick my ear.

    http://www.etymotic.com/hp/er20.html

    http://www.noisehelp.com/noise-dose.html

    I know there's a guy on this website who is an audiologist so that's as much as I can point to.
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    Aug 06, 2012 2:22 AM GMT
    Boomm18 said
    closer85 saidha. when i'm at gay bars, i only get hit on my the desperate guy. ;) but usually i'd agree with this assessment. i don't really approach guys though because i usually can't feel attracted to a guy until i discern he's reasonably intelligent

    It seems to me like 80% of the guys at gay bars are the desperate guys.


    Well I thought that at least the bars have a few attractive ones. Online it's not like that. Plus when you're online, if you suck at profiles and first impressions, well then you are screwed!! I'm always told I'm way better in person. Oh and if you go to the bathhouse...you won't find anything good unless it's like Saturday night after the bars close...and even then.
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    Aug 06, 2012 2:47 AM GMT
    closer85 saidha. when i'm at gay bars, i only get hit on my the desperate guy. ;) but usually i'd agree with this assessment. i don't really approach guys though because i usually can't feel attracted to a guy until i discern he's reasonably intelligent


    Weirdo.

    I judge men solely on the basis of their looks....that's what normal people do.
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    Aug 06, 2012 2:49 AM GMT
    At gay bars/clubs, most of the men will just opt to fondling you. However, being that the type I am, I prefer to make the first move, so I've talked and hit on a few dudes at the gay bar/club. Then again, I was drunk when this happens, but it's more of a social thing. icon_lol.gif
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    Aug 06, 2012 2:58 AM GMT
    Meh, I haven't noticed much of a difference.
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    Aug 06, 2012 3:07 AM GMT
    Boomm18 said
    closer85 saidha. when i'm at gay bars, i only get hit on my the desperate guy. ;) but usually i'd agree with this assessment. i don't really approach guys though because i usually can't feel attracted to a guy until i discern he's reasonably intelligent

    It seems to me like 80% of the guys at gay bars are the desperate guys.


    true. desperate and usually not age appropriate. i'm also not into guys who just touch me before talking to me. it's an almost instant turn off.
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    Aug 06, 2012 3:12 AM GMT
    closer85 said
    Boomm18 said
    closer85 saidha. when i'm at gay bars, i only get hit on my the desperate guy. ;) but usually i'd agree with this assessment. i don't really approach guys though because i usually can't feel attracted to a guy until i discern he's reasonably intelligent

    It seems to me like 80% of the guys at gay bars are the desperate guys.


    true. desperate and usually not age appropriate. i'm also not into guys who just touch me before talking to me. it's an almost instant turn off.

    I agree. The only exception(as shallow as it may be) would be if they were really hot. But that's never the case.... lol
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    Aug 06, 2012 3:37 AM GMT
    Boomm18 said
    closer85 said
    Boomm18 said
    closer85 saidha. when i'm at gay bars, i only get hit on my the desperate guy. ;) but usually i'd agree with this assessment. i don't really approach guys though because i usually can't feel attracted to a guy until i discern he's reasonably intelligent

    It seems to me like 80% of the guys at gay bars are the desperate guys.


    true. desperate and usually not age appropriate. i'm also not into guys who just touch me before talking to me. it's an almost instant turn off.

    I agree. The only exception(as shallow as it may be) would be if they were really hot. But that's never the case.... lol


    Even then, it's like "talk to me first" - then you can touch.

    I've only been groped by one guy who was attractive - and honestly, it turned me off because I got the vibe that he was incredibly arrogant and it's like "oh look I can get any guy I want." So I basically just looked at him, winked, said "nope, that doesn't work for me" and walked away. He was very very cute, though. Maybe I do need to lighten up, but *shrug*
  • AMoonHawk

    Posts: 11406

    Aug 06, 2012 4:10 AM GMT
    Boomm18 saidI actually went to a gay bar for the first time alone the other night. I was really nervous and wasn't sure if it was weird to go alone. But it wasn't long before I had guys coming and trying to get to know me. Which rarely happens when I'm with others. I'll go to gay bars alone more often now that I know it's fun to do!

    That always happens to new meat ... so you are going to have to make the rounds to all of them in order to stay new icon_twisted.gif