A Father Disowning His Son

  • metta

    Posts: 39118

    Aug 07, 2012 3:10 PM GMT


    http://imgur.com/pCrHU


    pCrHU.jpg
  • mizu5

    Posts: 2599

    Aug 07, 2012 3:12 PM GMT
    This seems so unbelievably cruel and cold and unfeeling, like a business proposal or somesuch thing.
  • Lincsbear

    Posts: 2605

    Aug 07, 2012 3:15 PM GMT
    Cruel is the word for this letter!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 07, 2012 3:20 PM GMT
    Horrible.

    My partner's father drowned him, by email. And the old bastard stuck with it until he died. It was so cruel and hurtful.

    The love of a parent is supposed to be unconditional.
  • Hothouse

    Posts: 2204

    Aug 07, 2012 3:20 PM GMT
    Heartbreaking.
    I want to give him a hug -
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 07, 2012 3:20 PM GMT
    The Dad is just in shock and so is the Ego/ DNA. Give him time and he will cave.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 07, 2012 3:21 PM GMT
    Alpha13 saidThe Dad is just in shock and so is the Ego/ DNA. Give him time and he will cave.


    Not necessarily. Known by personal experience as stated upthread.
  • Hothouse

    Posts: 2204

    Aug 07, 2012 3:22 PM GMT
    Alpha13 saidThe Dad is just in shock and so is the Ego/ DNA. Give him time and he will cave.


    The letter was written 5 years ago - August 2007 - so, he's taking his time in caving.
  • Sportsfan1

    Posts: 479

    Aug 07, 2012 3:25 PM GMT
    This has got to be one of the most horrible things a father can do to a son. This person had no business being a "father". My heart goes out to his son.
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    Aug 07, 2012 3:25 PM GMT
    That's when you go back and burn the house down as they're all sleeping. Show them what real hate is.
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    Aug 07, 2012 3:26 PM GMT
    How could anyone do that to their own son? I hope at least that person had a mother or something to accept him...

    People suck. We get reminders of that daily.
  • masculumpedes

    Posts: 5549

    Aug 07, 2012 3:27 PM GMT
    showme saidHorrible. And the old bastard stuck with it until he died.


    Yep - mine died in 1997. He disowned me in 1983. icon_confused.gif
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    Aug 07, 2012 3:27 PM GMT
    As hurtful as that is, that is NOT family. I can't fathom how any parent could ever do that. I hope he has a long and miserable life. I hope his family and friends disown him just like he disowned his son.
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    Aug 07, 2012 3:29 PM GMT
    So fucked up. icon_confused.gif
  • CuriousJockAZ

    Posts: 19129

    Aug 07, 2012 3:32 PM GMT
    metta8 said

    http://imgur.com/pCrHU


    pCrHU.jpg



    I wish this kid would go to the local newspaper and have this letter printed in full for all in this douchebag dad's community to see. He should be ashamed of himself and is a sad excuse for a father. Somehow, the true meaning of religion that includes "unconditional love" was missed on this jerk.
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    Aug 07, 2012 3:32 PM GMT
    where'd you get this?
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Aug 07, 2012 3:34 PM GMT
    Thanks for putting this on... I've never really read anything like this and I found it interesting how this "father" chose to communicate his thoughts, especially the part about his gay son's "birthday and life".. and he told him "goodbye". Very sad and tramatic I'm sure. I just hope the gay recipeint has other family members who accept him and he isn't alone.
    I wish I knew more about how this letter was accepted. icon_sad.gif
  • swimbikerun

    Posts: 2835

    Aug 07, 2012 3:36 PM GMT
    "--P.S. I am not gay."
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    Aug 07, 2012 3:48 PM GMT
    I guess this letter is particularly heart-breaking for each of us, because we were/are afraid we would receive something like it. I recall saving up half my allowance from the days of high school on, just in case I got thrown out.

    If you ever get the chance of meeting a parent that disowned their child because of their Christian belief, this quote may come in handy:

    Matthew 7:9
    "Which of you, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone?"
  • skyguyWI

    Posts: 7

    Aug 07, 2012 3:55 PM GMT
    Had I come out while my father was still alive, I probably would have gotten a similar letter. I had an uncle, with whom I had been close my entire life, give me an hour and a half long lecture on how bad it was that I was gay. I was 33 at the time I came out. He ended his lecture with, "When you are in our house, you will pretend to be straight." I never visited again, and he died last year. It's sad that we had that rift that went unresolved.

    The son who received that letter will find that after the sting of the rejection subsides, it will actually be a growing experience. When faced with such a situation, one often finds inner strength. I wish the son well. That father will live the rest of his years with regret.
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    Aug 07, 2012 3:59 PM GMT
    I was disowned at 19 years old, the summer after my sophomore year at UCLA. Not only was I estranged from my nuclear family (father, mother, three younger brothers), but I was set adrift financially, with only a part-time job and two more years of college to pay for. To say the least, it was difficult on me, emotionally and otherwise.

    The good news is, some fathers live long enough to take that s**t back. Fortunately, mine has.
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    Aug 07, 2012 4:01 PM GMT
    Am I the only one who thought that was probably one of the hardest handwriting to read or what?

    Either way, that is really heartbreaking!
  • honestsweat

    Posts: 183

    Aug 07, 2012 4:01 PM GMT
    A wise friend shared this with me: "Sometimes we learn from our parents HOW to be; sometimes we learn from our parents how NOT to be."
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    Aug 07, 2012 4:06 PM GMT
    I'm more concerned about whatever the son is going through... the way this shit affects the mind and emotions is painful. Hope he's got support and help from his friends and the gay community.
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    Aug 07, 2012 4:06 PM GMT
    It would be interesting to have a good hand writing analyst review the father's letter. In my opinion, this is not a well educated or learned man. He isn't thinking clearly, and doesn't seem to have the capacity for reason and discussion. If I was that son, I'd consider myself well rid of such a 'father' and I'd have nothing further to do with him. I have a relative like that - - - a rotten, spoiled, homophobic brother. We just have to let that type of person go.