Alpha13 saidwhateveryo saidI really enjoyed the book and yeah I agree it's very eye opening.
My only problem with it though is that his whole theory seems to be based on the idea of 'toxic shame' that gay men develop from an early age. It's a convenient way to explain the problems that gay men face in a predominantly heterosexual society but I think the explanation is stretched a tad too thin.
The most valuable chapter for me was the last one, giving practical advice about how to tackle the issues that effect gay men adversely. It certainly helped me to understand why I was so judgmental about other people and so quick to see the worst in them/ be overly defensive.
I think the book sucks because his thesis is rooted in bigotry which is that a human being is a victim of his upbringing and can't be expected to behave in any other than a programmed manner. Case studies dont support that.
I feel blessed to be able to love guys. From puberty on I did not give a fuck what southern red neck ministers thought about me. The syndrome he describes is simple prolonged immaturity...not having the balls to think for oneself and believe in oneself.
I think that it's just a book for gay men who have problems. It's not the end all be all of every gay mans experience. But it explains logically why some gay men grow up all on the offensive...and do destructive hateful things.. or even adopt traits that start off healthy and become non healthy.. it explains Erik Rhodes well... If you do not feel it applies to you.. it applies to someone you know. Case Studies DO show that your environment heavily dictates who you are and your life.. heavily... from where you are raised to your poverty level..
I think the key is in that a lot of gay men with these issues don't know how to identify them. So for them.. this is a great book to help them on road to understanding what needs to be fixed.
I don't find it broad at all.
