I feel sorry for those of you who feel like marriage is some sort of a curse or a cage. Clearly there are issues of restrictions on your independence that you need to address. Don't mean to sound like an ass, but I'd recommend doing it now before you're old and dying alone.
Marriage isn't about taking over someone else's life or about absorbing someone else's assets, or any of that other nonsense you guys are bitching about. Its two individuals who, through not only love but rationality, decide to spend their lives walking through this beautiful experience together. It shouldn't be a codependent nor a parasitic situation, but rather an interdependent bond between two people who value the companionship of one another over all other things. We are not meant to be alone, whether we're procreating straights or simply your average gay male.
Its about being an absolute truth to one another, respecting each other and the relationship you share more than anything else. Its loving that other person for who he is and being happy just to share your lives together. We're meant to bond and grow into something greater than ourselves, but not to lose oneself in the process. Its a very romantic thing to abandon to each other, but it shouldn't be based on expectation.... rather, a symbiotic companionship where neither truly needs but both cover each other's wants and nurture each other's secret weaknesses.
Take my boy James for example ("Stigmata"). He's one of the strongest willed, most independent men I've ever met. Its that independent strength which attracts me to him, warms my heart, and keeps me sane during this impossible year apart. I know that even as we grow together, he will never lose that which makes him "James," and he will never expect me to change, either. I'm sure we will alter things along the way in our own lives to make things better for each other, hell, we already have! But its not out of individual need, but because we care for one another and how the other feels.
Even despite all we have him common, we're as opposite as night and day. I'm an open book, he's more guarded than I can describe. I don't WANT to, but I could live without him. The past six months apart have proven that. We already both know we can absolutely without a doubt depend on the other, but we are not dependent on each other.
Why am I oozing about my boy? Simple. Its not the institution that's at fault, its your poor choices in partners and pathetic prioritizing that cause so many marriages to fail. Don't blame marriage, figure your own shit out and then realize there are things far more important than what you think are your own independent "needs." There are very few true needs in life... many people never even get off the ground of Maslow's Hierarchy and they live very happy lives.
And you can damn well bet I will be given the same marriage-granted rights as the straights. I don't want to be special, but I certainly won't accept less.