Saying I love you...

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 15, 2012 6:24 AM GMT
    Does anybody find it weird when people say that casually?

    Earlier today I was hanging out with a friend and as we hugged goodbye, he said "love you dude" or something along those lines. I have some friends that say that kind of stuff, but those are usually my really close friends. I used to work with this guy for a few weeks and we've only hung out about 3 or 4 times after work. I was really surprised and kind of mumbled something before saying goodbye icon_redface.gif
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    Aug 15, 2012 11:05 AM GMT
    I'm guessing that he feels a little closer to you than you feel to him. It may be an indication that he wants to be close friends with you. If it happens again and you don't want to say it back, just say thank you.
  • Medjai

    Posts: 2671

    Aug 15, 2012 11:07 AM GMT
    Say it easily? I've been with my boyfriend for almost a year now. We're really close, and we have never said it yet. Hell, I rarely even say it to my mother. I don't like the word.
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    Aug 15, 2012 11:15 AM GMT
    Love, with people, will grow on you.
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    Aug 15, 2012 11:23 AM GMT
    I always find that awkward and don't know what to say back, so I usually just say "yeah" or something.
  • rnch

    Posts: 11524

    Aug 15, 2012 11:26 AM GMT
    mdstudio saidI'm guessing that he feels a little closer to you than you feel to him. It may be an indication that he wants to be close friends with you. If it happens again and you don't want to say it back, just say thank you.






    agree icon_exclaim.gif
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    Aug 15, 2012 11:56 AM GMT
    There are times when I think it is devalued - we say 'Love you" and we dont mean it - We say "love you" when we mean "go away", we say "love you through gritted teeth.

    I have a freind who says "Love you - mean it" and I say it back - because I genuinely have a great deal of love for this guy./.....Others.. not so much
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    Aug 15, 2012 12:26 PM GMT
    I will often say it to some of my friends. My lesbian friends and I say it pretty much every time we say goodbye. We do love each other but it is a different level of love than say with a boyfriend.

    Some of my gay friends and I will say it from time to time as well. However, there is one of my best gay guy friends that we have never said it. The reason is because there are actually some feelings there so I think saying it would be awkward because that has the potential to mean more than the friendly "I love you"
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    Aug 15, 2012 12:37 PM GMT
    sc69 saidThere are times when I think it is devalued - we say 'Love you" and we dont mean it - We say "love you" when we mean "go away", we say "love you through gritted teeth.

    I have a freind who says "Love you - mean it" and I say it back - because I genuinely have a great deal of love for this guy./.....Others.. not so much


    I agree with it being devalued sometimes. Although I say it to my family quite often, when it comes to my friends I use it sparingly - like when somebody has a really shitty day and needs some support. But that's also only for those people that I can honestly say I do love.
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    Aug 15, 2012 12:37 PM GMT
    I don't day it casually...
    I say it quite often..and mean it...
    Watch this...

    I Love You JR !!
    And i meant it!!
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    Aug 15, 2012 12:52 PM GMT
    I love all you mofo's. icon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 15, 2012 1:07 PM GMT
    My best friend whose a straight male tells me that he loves me from time to time. Just words for a close connection you have with somebody!
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    Aug 15, 2012 1:18 PM GMT
    paulflexes saidI love all you mofo's. icon_biggrin.gif
    I wuv you too paul.icon_lol.gif
  • slimnmuscly

    Posts: 541

    Aug 15, 2012 1:22 PM GMT
    You were there, not me, but to me "love you dude" and "I love you" have different connotations.

    "Love you dude" sounds just a notch or two above "have a good one," so I wouldn't worry about it unless he gave you other cues that made it seem like he's falling for you (assuming that's not what you want) or thinks you're closer friends than you really are.
  • Drift

    Posts: 217

    Aug 15, 2012 1:28 PM GMT

    Like all words, it can be used in a genuine manner or not. And it will never mean quite the same thing each time you say it. I prefer only speaking when i have something to say, and when i actually wish to leave impact with my words.
  • jayatl56

    Posts: 463

    Aug 15, 2012 1:33 PM GMT
    Maybe it was connected with the previous conversation you had with him. Did you give him some advice that he appreciated? Helping someone often solicits a response of "love ya, dude".

    That said, in some languages/cultures the word love is rarely used in casual conversation. In Czech they don't even tell their parents they love them. It's more "I like you a lot". I love you is reserved for your spouse. They don't love their cars or TV shows or the new shoes they just bought and find it incredibly strange that Americans "LOVE" everything.

    I have a few friends both here and in Europe who do say "love ya" at the close of a conversation. Depending on who it is, I take it as a compliment; sort of sealing our friendship. My best friend in Berlin is a very straight womanizer but each and every time we see each other or chat on line, he ends the conversation with "I love you". And we do love each other but in a manner reserved for close friends, not lovers.
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    Aug 15, 2012 2:15 PM GMT
    i say it in a manner best reserved for other people in rehab.......'hi, i'm bob, and i'm a chronic masturbator,' ..... 'love you, bob!'
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    Aug 15, 2012 2:31 PM GMT
    Justim saidi say it in a manner best reserved for other people in rehab.......'hi, i'm bob, and i'm a chronic masturbator,' ..... 'love you, bob!'


    ROTFL...
    If i loved Bob... he Wouldn't be a chronic masturbator..
    Where's he at??
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    Aug 15, 2012 3:09 PM GMT
    slimnmuscly saidYou were there, not me, but to me "love you dude" and "I love you" have different connotations.

    "Love you dude" sounds just a notch or two above "have a good one," so I wouldn't worry about it unless he gave you other cues that made it seem like he's falling for you (assuming that's not what you want) or thinks you're closer friends than you really are.


    Agreed, however, the "I" is implied in the "Love you dude." "Love you dude" is an abridgement of "I love you dude."

    I am always amused by people who are afraid of the word and are worried about it being devalued by overuse; yet they will say I love ice cream!, I love my car!, I love steak!, I love that song! I love this or that! all day long.

    I suspect he was saying "Love you dude" in the same context as he would say "I love a good cafe latte." In other words he enjoys your company and you bring a level of ease and comfort as does his daily cafe latte.

    If being loved by too many people is your worst fear in life, I'd start counting my blessings if I were you.

    I am not afraid of the WORDS "I love you" because they are just words. I look to the ACTIONS of the person saying the WORDS to determine the depth of their meaning.
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    Aug 15, 2012 3:14 PM GMT
    The genuineness of the words are entirely dependent on the person saying them. icon_wink.gif

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    Aug 15, 2012 3:22 PM GMT
    Anocxu saidI don't say it casually...
    I say it quite often..and mean it...
    Watch this...

    I Love You JR !!
    And i meant it!!

    Awww, I feel the love! Now what kind of love is this? Do I have to write you long snail mail letters?
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    Aug 15, 2012 3:23 PM GMT
    meninlove said The genuineness of the words are entirely dependent on the person saying them. icon_wink.gif

    Don't forget the context in which they're said, and how you feel about that person. All can count for not; if the timing and circumstances aren't right.
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    Aug 15, 2012 3:32 PM GMT
    My friends and I get caught up in these sentimental moments where they say "i love you" and i'm like "I love you too" and then we hug it out. bromance yo
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    Aug 15, 2012 3:34 PM GMT
    JR_RJ said
    meninlove said The genuineness of the words are entirely dependent on the person saying them. icon_wink.gif

    Don't forget the context in which they're said, and how you feel about that person. All can count for not; if the timing and circumstances aren't right.


    Good points!
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    Aug 15, 2012 3:35 PM GMT


    lol, my Mom used to tell me, "When a man says he loves you remember he'll also say he loves ketchup." icon_lol.gif