I feel so miserable about being gay.

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    Aug 17, 2012 1:40 AM GMT

    Seriously am I the only one who feels like this?

    Gay sex is great, but everything else about gay life is mostly shit.
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    Aug 17, 2012 1:44 AM GMT
    What are some of the challenges that you are experiencing in "gay life"?
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    Aug 17, 2012 1:45 AM GMT
    I didn't choose this life so I try to make the best with what I have. Above all I'm a human being. My sexuality doesn't define who I am.

    That's the way I view it anyhow.
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    Aug 17, 2012 1:45 AM GMT
    xrichx saidWhat are some of the challenges that you are experiencing in "gay life"?

    Probably dating & coming out
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    Aug 17, 2012 1:49 AM GMT
    I'm just tired...tired of being lonely, tired of life being made so much harder because of it, tired of how bitchy and shallow most gay men are. There is nothing much fun about being gay, I'm sick of sex as well, I am so sick of it all, the same shit, it has never gotten better for me, I am just tired of it all, even realjock which has counselled me for over 4 years now.
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    Aug 17, 2012 1:57 AM GMT
    yourname2000 said560046_357641250968620_268330443233035_9

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    I have about 7 straight friends from my high school days and all of them have girlfriends or have have had girlfriends(2 or three long term) in the past. I never go to the movies even unless its being the 5th wheel.

    My social life is awful, I can't find any gay guys my own age anywhere even as friends to go out with, and I live in a big city. The only ones I've met are horrible snobby bitches.

    At my high school prom I didn't attend for obvious reasons, and as this gag of infamous fake awards I won the award for "most likely to die a virgin".

    Most straight people have life FARRRRR easier than we do.
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    Aug 17, 2012 2:00 AM GMT
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    Aug 17, 2012 2:02 AM GMT
    I didn;t choose to be gay, GAY chose me icon_cool.gif . . .. fuck yeah
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    Aug 17, 2012 2:05 AM GMT
    Darren22 said
    I have about 7 straight friends from my high school days and all of them have girlfriends or have have had girlfriends(2 or three long term) in the past. I never go to the movies even unless its being the 5th wheel.

    My social life is awful, I can't find any gay guys my own age anywhere even as friends to go out with, and I live in a big city. The only ones I've met are horrible snobby bitches.

    At my high school prom I didn't attend for obvious reasons, and as this gag of infamous fake awards I won the award for "most likely to die a virgin".

    Most straight people have life FARRRRR easier than we do.
    You're meeting the wrong types of guys, and at the wrong places. Don't let a few bad ones ruin you for everyone else. You're still young. You have plenty of time to meet guys, for either friendship or romance. You said you live in a big city. Go out, explore, and meet more people! icon_cool.gif
  • Pontifex

    Posts: 1882

    Aug 17, 2012 2:07 AM GMT
    Find something you enjoy doing and do it. Throw yourself into it. Relationships are nice but they won't fix everything. Maybe what is holding you back is your attitude and how you view things. What do you like to do? Why aren't you doing it?

    Finding a great guy won't automatically make everything better. You have learn to like yourself first before you can expect someone else to like you.
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    Aug 17, 2012 2:08 AM GMT
    self-loathing is not a good look hunnie. snap outta it asap or else you fate will resemble the majority of users on this site.
  • masculumpedes

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    Aug 17, 2012 2:14 AM GMT
    Darren22 said
    Seriously am I the only one who feels like this?

    Gay sex is great, but everything else about gay life is mostly shit.


    Perhaps you need a change of scenery. What are you able to do about it? icon_confused.gif
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    Aug 17, 2012 2:22 AM GMT
    eightball saidself-loathing is not a good look hunnie. snap outta it asap or else you fate will resemble the majority of users on this site.


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    Aug 17, 2012 2:23 AM GMT
    Darren22 saidI'm just tired...tired of being lonely, tired of life being made so much harder because of it, tired of how bitchy and shallow most gay men are. There is nothing much fun about being gay, I'm sick of sex as well, I am so sick of it all, the same shit, it has never gotten better for me, I am just tired of it all, even realjock which has counselled me for over 4 years now.


    Trust me when i say this:

    It only appears that way because you are within a minority which s developing still... and you are young and growing into a lot of things but the more you see the more you'll get you see that there's diversity and not every gay man is bitchy and you don't have to be lonesome or will you.. however the internet totally enhances the negativity and concentrates the "gay community".

    Just look for friends.. not boyfriends.. focus on your life period and not being gay because that is not all of you... it's a part of what drives you in a way but you are more than and usually when you focus on that more like minded gay men will appear sooner than later and then will open the door to other "gay realities" (for lack of a better description. and you will find your "people". Gay culture is heavily diverse and split.. even attitudes.. it's just the shitty ones that get picked up and amplified. It exists... but if you look..and are open to looking.. you will find..

    So yeah.. it gets better.
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    Aug 17, 2012 2:28 AM GMT
    JackKash said
    Darren22 saidI'm just tired...tired of being lonely, tired of life being made so much harder because of it, tired of how bitchy and shallow most gay men are. There is nothing much fun about being gay, I'm sick of sex as well, I am so sick of it all, the same shit, it has never gotten better for me, I am just tired of it all, even realjock which has counselled me for over 4 years now.


    Trust me when i say this:

    It only appears that way because you are within a minority which s developing still... and you are young and growing into a lot of things but the more you see the more you'll get you see that there's diversity and not every gay man is bitchy and you don't have to be lonesome or will you.. however the internet totally enhances the negativity and concentrates the "gay community".

    Just look for friends.. not boyfriends.. focus on your life period and not being gay because that is not all of you... it's a part of what drives you in a way but you are more than and usually when you focus on that more like minded gay men will appear sooner than later and then will open the door to other "gay realities" (for lack of a better description. and you will find your "people". Gay culture is heavily diverse and split.. even attitudes.. it's just the shitty ones that get picked up and amplified. It exists... but if you look..and are open to looking.. you will find..

    So yeah.. it gets better.


    Oh shut the fuck up! I've heard all that positive dreamy crap before! Saying that shit never works! It just makes you feel good and puts you in positive denial.
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    Aug 17, 2012 2:32 AM GMT
    Darren22 said
    JackKash said
    Darren22 saidI'm just tired...tired of being lonely, tired of life being made so much harder because of it, tired of how bitchy and shallow most gay men are. There is nothing much fun about being gay, I'm sick of sex as well, I am so sick of it all, the same shit, it has never gotten better for me, I am just tired of it all, even realjock which has counselled me for over 4 years now.


    Trust me when i say this:

    It only appears that way because you are within a minority which s developing still... and you are young and growing into a lot of things but the more you see the more you'll get you see that there's diversity and not every gay man is bitchy and you don't have to be lonesome or will you.. however the internet totally enhances the negativity and concentrates the "gay community".

    Just look for friends.. not boyfriends.. focus on your life period and not being gay because that is not all of you... it's a part of what drives you in a way but you are more than and usually when you focus on that more like minded gay men will appear sooner than later and then will open the door to other "gay realities" (for lack of a better description. and you will find your "people". Gay culture is heavily diverse and split.. even attitudes.. it's just the shitty ones that get picked up and amplified. It exists... but if you look..and are open to looking.. you will find..

    So yeah.. it gets better.


    Oh shut the fuck up! I've heard all that positive dreamy crap before! Saying that shit never works! It just makes you feel good and puts you in positive denial.



    Ok.. well you are being just as bitchy and self loathing and fucked up as the people you can't stand that make you miserable. The truth about it is is that it is completely up to and you can reject some good words and look into them and utilize it as some kind of road map to get to a better state.. or you can bitch, whine and moan and piss on yourself and anyone else who tries to say anything decent to you.


    Leave your town, build better self esteem.. go where people who are like you are.. figure out your interest. This is logical normal shit that people who are actually happy do and will tell you. It's no lottery. You have options.

    You can follow some advice or at least hear it out from any of these people responding to it or you can just shut the fuck up yourself. You chose your fate.

    You are now just choosing to be apathetic and a bitch. Exactly the kind of person who you just opened up about disliking.

    So something tells me you just might be attracting what you are and are in good company. Chew on that bone.
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    Aug 17, 2012 2:35 AM GMT
    Darren22 said
    JackKash said
    Darren22 saidI'm just tired...tired of being lonely, tired of life being made so much harder because of it, tired of how bitchy and shallow most gay men are. There is nothing much fun about being gay, I'm sick of sex as well, I am so sick of it all, the same shit, it has never gotten better for me, I am just tired of it all, even realjock which has counselled me for over 4 years now.


    Trust me when i say this:

    It only appears that way because you are within a minority which s developing still... and you are young and growing into a lot of things but the more you see the more you'll get you see that there's diversity and not every gay man is bitchy and you don't have to be lonesome or will you.. however the internet totally enhances the negativity and concentrates the "gay community".

    Just look for friends.. not boyfriends.. focus on your life period and not being gay because that is not all of you... it's a part of what drives you in a way but you are more than and usually when you focus on that more like minded gay men will appear sooner than later and then will open the door to other "gay realities" (for lack of a better description. and you will find your "people". Gay culture is heavily diverse and split.. even attitudes.. it's just the shitty ones that get picked up and amplified. It exists... but if you look..and are open to looking.. you will find..

    So yeah.. it gets better.


    Oh shut the fuck up! I've heard all that positive dreamy crap before! Saying that shit never works! It just makes you feel good and puts you in positive denial.


    tumblr_lm1a6tN86e1qbvcmoo1_500.gif
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    Aug 17, 2012 2:39 AM GMT
    I'm surprised the Red Cross isn't in this post giving out blankets, donuts and cups of coffee because this is a damn disaster.
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    Aug 17, 2012 2:48 AM GMT
    yourname2000 said
    Darren22 saidOh shut the fuck up! I've heard all that positive dreamy crap before! Saying that shit never works! It just makes you feel good and puts you in positive denial.

    212x176px-LL-ef378953_eww.gif


    LMAO!!! Yourname2000 will you marry me? Pleasssseee
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    Aug 17, 2012 2:51 AM GMT
    Someone needs a hug.
    But I don't have a gif for that (yet).
    How 'bout a fist bump instead?
    tumblr_m8ue7qORat1re2hy1o1_400.gif
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    Aug 17, 2012 2:54 AM GMT
    Neight saidSomeone needs a hug.
    But I don't have a gif for that (yet).
    How 'bout a fist bump instead?
    tumblr_m8ue7qORat1re2hy1o1_400.gif


    Marry me! I need rescuing! I'm become annoyingly bitter and cynical, that svores points right?
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    Aug 17, 2012 3:09 AM GMT
    Gay is so much more fun than str8, especially in your 20s. The only time it should be a total bitch is later in life when we realize we forgot to have kids to take care of us.

    Plus, here in my 50s without a partner (those rude dead bastards), that ain't so much fun. But that happens to my str8 friends too. And it's just as much of a bitch for them at this age. And my str8 friends without children have mostly the very same concerns that I do about later aging.

    I have doubts from just what I've read here that being gay is your biggest problem. Not everyone has the happy gene. So you might have to work at being happy more so than someone else might. That's what you need to figure out. And there are methods you can learn and steps you can take and things about life that you can work to understand which will allow you to enjoy moreso your life as it has been presented to you.

    Seek help if you need it. Read books, they're easily available. Find your happy. Being gay? That's just a bonus. Being negative about being gay? That's like someone handing you a pile of money and you complaining that you have to lug around a pile of money. This pile of money is so heavy. It keeps getting in my way. How can I spend it if I don't even want to carry it. Poor people are so much happier than me because they don't have this problem.
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    Aug 17, 2012 4:25 AM GMT
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  • Webster666

    Posts: 9217

    Aug 17, 2012 4:47 AM GMT
    Let's see.
    You're 22 years old, adorable, and fed up with life.

    Congratulations.
    You're a normal 22 year old.

    You won't believe it now, but everything will work out well, for you if you make a habit of hanging out where gay boys congregate, in your city.
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    Aug 17, 2012 4:50 AM GMT
    Webster666 saidYou won't believe it now, but everything will work out well, for you if you make a habit of hanging out where gay boys congregate, in your city.


    How so?