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Are you afraid of dying or the act of doing so?

I'm quite comfortable dying,(if I had to of course), but the actual moment rouses my curiousity lately.

I assume you mean you're comfortable with the IDEA of dying, cuz you ain't dead yet. I saw a lot of friends die during the worst years of the AIDS epidemic. I am not looking forward to it.

I also had a classic near death experience in a hospital about 20 years ago. It was actually pleasurable but I don't think it was "real" in any metaphysical way.

I'm good with the idea of dying my only "fear" is is dying a violent death, that's all.

Let me clarify, I'm not ill at all. However, I try to live life to my satisfaction knowing I could die tomorrow.

I know so many people afraid to die, that doesn;t scare me just how the actual moment will feel.

Sorry, a morbid topic, just on my mind.

My biggest fear is dieing alone without having ever experiencing that feeling of true love..... That is what scare a true hopeless romantic

There's a few people who would be really sad if I died, and since I care a lot about said people, I'd really rather stay alive. If I were without meaningful relationships though I don't think I'd mind too much for myself.

It's not so much that I'm afraid of dying... I just don't want to be there when it happens.

No, not really. I've tried to end it 3 times before. All failed. So if one has tried the act of suicide, can he really be afraid of death?

I wasn't very kind to myself in the late 90's. Multiple near death dance floor overdoses and such. Dying actually seemed pretty cool at the time, but I got over that when I came down. Now I'm not so keen on croaking. I try to enjoy every day because I know I might not get another one. When I do go though, I can't decide weather it would be cooler to die peacefully, or in some hilariously improbable fashion like a massive stroke during frenzied sex or getting crushed by a fat woman throwing herself off the top of the Sears Tower.

I'm not really afraid of death, it's that act of dying that scares me to death.

I just hope I didn't regret that one time I watched "The View."

"to die, would be an awfully great adventure"

-peter pan

i concur

Dying - I don't want to be around when that happens.

Death- If it is anything like the time before I was born or nights when don't dream I can handle it.

As for me I am hoping for robot bodies to replace organic bodies when my time is running out.

DEATH is just the termination of chemical reactions in our bodies. A mere level of elimation the conversion of chemicals into energy. Death is a part of the cycle of Life or cycle of death.

It should not be feared, but respected for it is just Nature

Lil man I am Planiing now to catch the Bus in Colorado on New Years Eve. Method covering self with Vasoline and Gas (poor man's Naplam) mixed with packets of Magnesium. Cobalt Sodium and Copper powder to give off varoius colors. Will leave a note instructing teh officals to bury waht ever is left and to notify NO ONE

I am deeply attached to the particular chemical reactions in my body that sustain my life. To anyone who has similar sentiments dying would be a hateful happening.

Not all share that feelings sorry

I have always thought that the finite nature of our existance gives it its meaning, but i doubt that will be completely consoling when the time comes.

Best method is to plan when and where. Where for me will be on the ski slopes and time will be Midnite 31 DEC

I will try

Im comfortable with it, because well technical i already have died. I had cancer and during the surgery i had a heart attack, and it took 5 minutes to revive me. i just remember seeing swirling lights, like looking inside a white tornado.

Wow, seriously?

yes i am. its something that i was at one time uncomfortable expressing but i remember it all very clearly. i was dead but God saw it fit to let me live.

yes i am. its something that i was at one time uncomfortable expressing but i remember it all very clearly. i was dead but God saw it fit to let me live.

Glad you made it through

me too... knock on wood

Joe, Why are you intent on ending it?

Lived my life have a some genetic issues.

I am very affraid of dying and I dont know why! theree is times when I cant sleep at nights and just think about it to the point I freak out!


Is this normal? I know there is lots of people who aren't affraid

joeindallas saidLil man I am Planiing now to catch the Bus in Colorado on New Years Eve. Method covering self with Vasoline and Gas (poor man's Naplam) mixed with packets of Magnesium. Cobalt Sodium and Copper powder to give off varoius colors. Will leave a note instructing teh officals to bury waht ever is left and to notify NO ONE

Okay, now you're kind of creeping me out.

Not afraid of dying at all. I'm at a point in my life where I feel connected to with who I am and how I've LIVED this life thus far.

Like a1972guy, my only fear is the way I will die. Plane crash, no biggie. Heart attack, oh well. I most definitely DO NOT want to die drowning, buried alive, or my worst fear...living out the rest of my life in an Insane Asylum where I know for a fact that I'm sane while everyone else thinks I'm crazy. That's death within itself.

I don't think I am afraid of dying, but it is impossible to know until one gets into that situation. It also depends if it is a sudden event, or a slow lingering experience.

When I was 6 years old my family was involved in a car accident in Florida. I can still remember the big wheels of the truck looming in front of our car and thinking "I am going to die". I don't know how I even knew of such a thing but I guess it was instinctual. Needless to say I was overwhelmed by fear for a few seconds.

In 2006 I was in an airplane that had to make an emergency landing. It landed safely but it was tense for 15 minutes. If the plane had spun out of control the experience would have been terrifying I am sure. The wings would have likely been ripped off and the plane would have plummetted to earth at 500+ mph. The only consolation would have been I would have died with my partner.

I just hope it happens quick. My biggest fear is burning to death...though I would rather burn to death than burn ALMOST to death.

I agree. Not so much afraid of dying, it's inevitable; however, the pain - I don't want the pain.

But I do think about it. When I'm about to do something, I tell myself, is this really the last thing you want to be doing before you die?

Usually, I opt out.

Thank you, 26mileman, for this uplifting subject. I also have a fear of dieing in a plane crash and I am getting on a plane and flying to Los Angeles for the weekend in a few hours.

AZ I plan to be so self medicated I will not even know I am at a Bhuddist BBQ. Love to hve it videoed and put on You Tube my 15 mins of fame

I think you need to think it through even more Joe. Suicide is not the way to go. How do you think it will make all the people who care about you feel? Make them feel like a failure as a friend/family? Neices, nephews, little cousins, what if they all look up to you, and you end it... leaving them no chance to get to know you better. No matter how rough life seems, suicide is NOT the answer to anything. Trust me when I say this, life is worth living, no matter what. If you need to talk about something, anything, I'm sure there are lots of guys who will listen, hell email me if you want. Just think about it.

Lil Man that is why I am doing it in CO I am from the North East and I am leaveing intructions not to notify any body. Suicide is the last peice of Free will that Government or society hs not taken away

Yea, but that shouldn't be the reason for ending your life... nothing is worth that..NOTHING.

I'm not afraid of Dying

joeindallas saidLil Man that is why I am doing it in CO I am from the North East and I am leaveing intructions not to notify any body. Suicide is the last peice of Free will that Government or society hs not taken away

I agree, just about the only intrinsic right that human beings really have is the right to make the final decision about their life. In most cases suicide is the wrong decision, but if a person is in agony dying of terminal cancer, who would argue with them wanting to end the suffering. Well closeted sadists would of course, but besides those people.

Lil Man tell you I moved from North East to Dallas. I told one person that I had cared for MY MOTHER who had suffer a stroke and was wheel chaired bound for 13 yrs. The response to that by the Dallas Gay Community was to treat me like a LEPER. That is a good part of it.

When that happened I realized that I am too good to suffer in this world.

I understand, people can be fucking assholes, but don't let those people be the reasoning for doing it.. that's just letting them win. Have you thought about moving instead?

done that thanks for the concern but trust me it is all foe the best. No before I go I will tell all might hurt some peoples feelings but tit for tat

Suicide is never for the best.

joeindallas saidLil Man that is why I am doing it in CO I am from the North East and I am leaveing intructions not to notify any body. Suicide is the last peice of Free will that Government or society hs not taken away

Isn't that worse for any family members that are left, that false hope that you're alive and well somewhere? And then the disappointment as they reach that time period where they say "He has to have died by now?" At least, even if you won't reconsider your suicide, you won't burden your loved ones with false hope, an investigation, and leaving them waiting for your return.

Lil man as long as you hurt no body else physically no big thing in suicide

not true...

Refreshing to see some postive well really negative response to my planned self termination. I had wish I had this same response from the guy here in Dallas, when the trash talker had his fun at mu expense

just reconsider it man. can you do that?

can do that but no promises

that's all I can ask.. I'm not asking you to promise anything.. but just really really think about it.

I was in a really horrifying traffic accident years ago. Hit by an 18-wheeler on the interstate. Our car was sideways on the road and I could see it getting closer and closer, then finally hitting us. My thought as I looked at it getting closer was, "Aw, shit, I'm going to die right now. I'm going to miss my family and friends and there was so much I haven't done yet in life."

Fortunately, amazingly, I not only didn't die, but I had little more than bruises. The road was wet (thus why we hydroplaned and were sideways in the road) and apparently it lessened the force of the impact.

All that to say, I'm not really afraid of dying, just as long as it doesn't come too soon. I want to live a good long, experience-filled life.

(And I'm repeating myself from another thread, I realize this).

joeindallas you need to seriously get help. No one can convince you to live.

And if you let others influence you so easily, you have a lot to learn. Buck up, life is not meant to be easy. And the worst possible thing EVER to do is feel sorry for yourself. Is just a viscous pointless cycle.

Remember everyone else is dealing with their own problems too. And lots of people have much worse circumstances and their holding on.

Relax guys... Joe has said this before. I don't think he'll actually do it, but if he does, know that several friends, including myself have advised against it.

With that said, you do have to admire his flair for a dramatic exit. If he really planned to do it, I had suggested doing it at night in downtown Dallas by jumping off a tall building while on fire. In order for this to work though, you'd have to find a way to make sure cameras are rolling beforehand... and since the media does not cover suicides, you'd have to convince them their was something more to it.

About death itself: I totally agree that dying is a big part of living. Without death, there would be no life. Does anyone rememeber "The Lion King?" How about the song "Circle of Life?" As basic as that might, the movie and song pretty much spell it out.

I'm not afraid of dying. I've lived an awesome life and have already surpassed all of the expectations I ever had for myself. Best of all, I have a man who loves me beyond any imagination.

Would I like to do and experience more? Of course! But if it happened tomorrow, I would have no regrets.

My only wish is that my death be quick and painless.

Well film at 10 on KBTV .

I think the advise was "if you do it do it big." That was a couple of days after Capt B talked some sense into somebody.

I hope to get all I can from this life and then accept the time when it comes. I just hope then when my time does come it's not some heinously tragic way that's painful and slow.

So I am not afraid.

obscenewish saidI assume you mean you're comfortable with the IDEA of dying, cuz you ain't dead yet. I saw a lot of friends die during the worst years of the AIDS epidemic. I am not looking forward to it.

I also had a classic near death experience in a hospital about 20 years ago. It was actually pleasurable but I don't think it was "real" in any metaphysical way.

Don't let some medical hog wash discredit your experience. There's no way to prove or disprove what you experienced. Science likes to come up with physical proof to either accept or invalidate what happens in this world. But there are things happening all the time that science can't explain but may be able to in the future.

Am I afraid of dying?... No not especially
No one wants to suffer
but that doesn't always go hand in hand with dying

It's a journey all of us are going to have to make sooner or later
and I'd like it to be as easy and dignified as possible

muchmorethanDon't let some medical hog wash discredit your experience. There's no way to prove or disprove what you experienced. Science likes to come up with physical proof to either accept or invalidate what happens in this world. But there are things happening all the time that science can't explain but may be able to in the future.

Actually, one of my professors in my master's program, an MD, wrote the classic book on near-death experiences. I never talked about my own experience until I met him, although it had a profound effect on me.

In recent years, neuroscientists have demonstrated that much of the NDE can be reproduced by stimulation of certain areas of the brain. They've also done research into meditative states with brain imaging. Much of what we have classically called a transcendental or religious experience seems to be explicable in terms of brain functions.

This does not mean that the experiences aren't of value. The memory of my NDE still fills me with awe and my longtime meditation practice is still the best therapy I know.

There is an annoying tendency in the culture to literalize everything. There isn't much that we do that doesn't involve the imagination, which is not particularly bound by empirical reality.

I can enter a meditative state and find it sublime without concretizing it as penetration to a spiritual realm. The imagination deals with the metaphor but does not necessarily reject the empirical: "I feel as if I have left my body, although I know I have not. The feeling is sublimely "uplifting," "lightens" my worries and "elevates" my mood, even though I know I have not literally left my body."

I never thought that I was afraid of dying and that it wouldn't be that big of a deal. I'm mean, it's just over right? And whatever is next, is next. I've had a great life. But when it almost happend last year, I was a little afraid because I thought about how sad my kids would be if I didn't pull through. However the act of death itself, nah....

But when I go I want to make a giant mess. Splatter on the pavement or something like that. Not in my sleep. That would be way too boring for me.

From a volunteer palliative care perspective, we all die. What happens then is the grandest mystery of them all. Occasionally, the veil seems so thin I could put my arm through it. In moments like that, what's left of my hair stands on end.

I'm saddened by the separation from a physical presence in the world, but not so much afraid of it as to how I'll go.

I often joke that I'm goona have the alzheimer's so I won't know what's going on.

joeindallas, are you really going to cross over dragging the weight of untotalled years with you?

You might think there's nothing after, but how can you be so sure?

If your life has so little value to you, give it to someone else.

Killing yourself is going to wound someone you'll leave behind, and you may scar them for life. Don't kid yourself - someone loves you and you will devastate them. So, how could you?

...here's another perspective,

Joni Mitchell said it best in Song For Sharon (album - 'Hejira')

"A woman I knew just drowned herself,
The well was deep and muddy,
She was just shaking off futility,
Or punishing somebody."

....the message here is that if you consider your life worth nothing, by throwing it away you're TELLING everyone to think that too. And how sad if people do. But then, you won't know anything about it, will you?

I'm not afraid of death. We all have to do it sometime - nobody gets out of this alive!

I almost died once - when I was 17. I was shot through the chest with a 22 by a burglar robbing our house. The bastard fled, and I bled so much - it hurt so badly - I was absolutely sure I was going to die. A friend was with me that day, unhurt, and he called the police. I was surprised I was still alive when the ambulance came, the paramedics worked so hard on me all the way to the hospital. I never knew you could lose so much blood and still live. Anyway I'm still here - and won't be afraid when the end for me really comes. I believe I'm going to Heaven - and I'll hang out with all the people I love who went before me - so in a way, I'm kind of looking forward to it - at the right time.

Jockbod48 saidI'm not afraid of death. We all have to do it sometime - nobody gets out of this alive!

I almost died once - when I was 17. I was shot through the chest with a 22 by a burglar robbing our house. The bastard fled, and I bled so much - it hurt so badly - I was absolutely sure I was going to die. A friend was with me that day, unhurt, and he called the police. I was surprised I was still alive when the ambulance came, the paramedics worked so hard on me all the way to the hospital. I never knew you could lose so much blood and still live. Anyway I'm still here - and won't be afraid when the end for me really comes. I believe I'm going to Heaven - and I'll hang out with all the people I love who went before me - so in a way, I'm kind of looking forward to it - at the right time.

wow... intense.

but glad u are still here bud!

I'm afraid of being sick and growing old, but dying isn't something I've thought about too much.
You hear about people with things like HIV (which I have) seeing life anew and "living each minute to the fullest." Well, that's not me. I've had HIV for ~20 years and if I'd lived each minute since I found out in 1986 to it's fullest I'd probably have blown my brain out by now.

I'm not afraid of dying, or what comes after, it's the manner which worries me.

Flying makes me nervous because I don't want to die, which is different than not being afraid of dying.

Being jumped from behind and killed for me wallet scares me, choking to death on my food because I live alone and there's no one around to help me scares me. When I go I just want to go quietly and easily in my sleep.

I would be lying if I said I didn't have my apprehensive moments about dying. Sometimes, when things are really good in my life I worry. Of course, this flies in the face of "live in the moment" philosophy but sometimes I can't help myself...

lilmaninsc saidNo, not really. I've tried to end it 3 times before. All failed. So if one has tried the act of suicide, can he really be afraid of death?

Yes, because many people who attempt suicide dont do it to truly end their lives- but do it rather as a cry for help. This is more common with females who attempt suicide. Males tend to use more lethal means...

Anyway... as for being afraid of death. I think its natural to be afraid or at least nervous. Because no one really knows what happens after we die.... I hope/believe that we just go to a peaceful, restful place. But maybe not. Maybe we just die and thats it. That idea is scary, yet oddly relieving in some way....

From the moment we are born, we start to die. Some do it in a few moments, others in a few day or years, some it takes many years. Yet it is a natural course of life.

Do I fear this? Hell know. I ride motorbikes, play with spiders, don't run from snakes.

Death is nothing more than another appointment, I'll have to keep.

Strange, the thought of dying has been at the back of my mind for some time now.

I went through a very long and destructive period of drinking and using, and I just don't even want to imagine the long-term damage I did to my body.

I'm in shape now, I eat right and I take care of myself, and I am very proud of how I turned my life around. But at times, I can't help feeling that the past is going to catch up with me.

But who knows, I could die in an earthquake here in Tokyo,or get hit by a car when I'm crossing the street. So, it's pointless worrying about it.

It's morning here. I'm going to try to enjoy today as much as possible.

I'm not afraid of dying but I am afraid of experiencing intense pain for a long period of time.

I'm leery of intense pain, too. But what I'm most afraid of is having to come back "here."

One serving of death, hold the pain, thanks.

No, not affraid of dying. I do not want to deal with pain though.

zbmwYes, because many people who attempt suicide dont do it to truly end their lives- but do it rather as a cry for help. This is more common with females who attempt suicide. Males tend to use more lethal means...

In fact, a high percentage of suicides are the result of impulsivity. A recent study determined that people who are foiled during their first attempt usually do not make a second attempt.

Article here:

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/07/06/magazine/06suicide-t.html?_r=1&pagewanted=1&ref=magazine&oref=slogin

I've seen what seems like a fairly large number of deaths in the last few years. Some quick and unexpected, some prolonged and rather horrible. Some with astonishing grace.

My state allows the lethal prescription for the terminally ill. I've seen situations where it would definitely be preferable, but I still don't know what I would choose. I think that you have to choose it while you can still administer it yourself.

obscenewish said

I can enter a meditative state and find it sublime without concretizing it as penetration to a spiritual realm. The imagination deals with the metaphor but does not necessarily reject the empirical: "I feel as if I have left my body, although I know I have not. The feeling is sublimely "uplifting," "lightens" my worries and "elevates" my mood, even though I know I have not literally left my body."

I think another concept other than the use of imagination is "interpretation."

I know I have left my body on some level and projected else where. This was done during meditative states and was done by accident. I believe we can make connections and be a part of other things. Just like a telephone call can connect via physical cords or through cellular phones that transmit waves of energy. It's communication, it's not all about "leaving" your body. I think when you "leave" your body that's called death.

Once I was meditating. It was actually an accident. I was lying in bed and I was obsessing over someone's bitchy inappropriate behavior toward me. I kept playing the scenarios over and over in my head. As I did so I started to disengage from my body like I've never experienced in the past. I talked about this once here before but it's been awhile. Anyway, I could see myself as a gas. Of all colors, the gas that I believe was my life force was pink! How girly! Anyway, the gas that I believed was me started to lift from my head and disengaged from my physical body while working its way downward. As this happened I could see the planet Earth below me as if I were being catapulted into the stratosphere that took literally 3 seconds. the Earth looked like a pinhead in just a few short seconds underneath me. During this whole time I could hear a sound that was like putting your ear to a large conch shell to hear that wind blowing like sound you get. It kept getting louder and louder. As all this was happening I tried to open my eyes and get up but I had no use of my body. I started panicking and felt that if this gas that was me completely disconnected that I'd be without my physical body which would equate to physical death.
Then I remembered in my meditation class to be "in the body" to be centered. So I said in my mind, "Back in the body" three times like a chant. I said it with nerve racking fervor as I believed I was slipping away. After saying my little chant the process reversed and the pinkish gas started to go back into my physical body from my lower legs working upward to my head. The sound of the wind stopped when the gas filled the final area of my head and only then was I able to open my eyes and get up and have use of my body.
So I think it is possible to leave the body as I pointed out in my example. But I think the best thing to do is make a connection like I explained earlier. There are people that reach this state that are conscious like I was in a similar situation and that choose to leave permanently. I decided to stay. God only knows why.

For many, dying is the easy part while life is the hard part. I hope to die like I hope to live, open eyes, open mind.

That's if you die a short and quick death. Imagine having a degenerative disease like stage 4 cancer with no possibility of remission.

I think it's best to wish for a peaceful final exit when it's time.

Not scared of death or dying. When my times comes I hope I am very very old and used up. Should it be cancer or some other type long process, I will choose death by overdose.

obscenewish said
I also had a classic near death experience in a hospital about 20 years ago. It was actually pleasurable but I don't think it was "real" in any metaphysical way.

Maybe death is indeed addictive. Once you've tasted it you always want more.. Once when I felt so tired of my problems, I laid down on my bed, closed my eyes and thought about death.. about being erased from this world.. no consciousness.. just total dark and everything fade away.. it was quite nice... I myself not afraid of the death.. it's our destiny, nothing can avoid it..

I presume death is like dreamless sleep..

Yes I'm scared of Dying. No I'm not scared of Death itself.

I'm just scared of pain, dying and death I can deal with.

Not afraid of dying. Would love to have a massive brain infarction when cumming!

Did anyone see this article on Yahoo about the elite triathlete who broke her neck during a race last Saturday? It's been on my mind a lot since I read it. When you get out of bed in the morning, you really never know if it will be your last day.

MikeOnMain saidDid anyone see this article on Yahoo about the elite triathlete who broke her neck during a race last Saturday? It's been on my mind a lot since I read it. When you get out of bed in the morning, you really never know if it will be your last day.

From the ArticleDrake said her sister told the family by blinking and nodding that she wanted to die.

"I talked to her and she nodded over and over and over again. She wanted to leave," Drake said. "No athlete would like to have a life with only their eyes talking."

I would have done the same. It would be a nightmare living like that, especially after being a triathlete.

lilmaninsc saidNo, not really. I've tried to end it 3 times before. All failed. So if one has tried the act of suicide, can he really be afraid of death?

I would say he's afraid of life...

...And by the way ilmaninsc, I'm glad you failed.