People on Grindr are all racist homophobes!

  • Borski1992

    Posts: 153

    Aug 22, 2012 7:09 AM GMT
    Apparently the language on Grindr is commonly racist, and even more surprisingly homophobic. According to Wikipedia:
    WikipediaThere is criticism that many users of the app use offensive racist and/or homophobic language, such as "No Asians", "No Blacks" or "No femmes".


    Damn it, I knew fags are homophobic!
    Seriously though, I know that the language isn't exactly nice to people, but I wouldn't go as far as to say it is racist or homophobic. It is personal preferences for who people are hooking up with. For instance, I am generally not attracted to black guys. There are every once in a while black guys who I would let do whatever they want to me, but for the most part it isn't the case. Would I be racist if I were to say I'm not attracted to blacks on Grindr? Although I haven't done that, I like to believe that it doesn't make me any more racist than saying I don't want to have sex with women makes me sexist, or saying I don't want to have sex with really obese people makes me weight-ist. I don't control who I am attracted to. As for the femmes thing, again, people could be a little nicer, but at least they are telling you up front what they like, unlike profiles where someone says, "Hit me up! I don't bite, and I love to talk to anyone!" and then never responds to anyone who isn't what they consider sexy as hell.
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    Aug 22, 2012 7:15 AM GMT
    Borski1992 saidApparently the language on Grindr is commonly racist, and even more surprisingly homophobic. According to Wikipedia:
    WikipediaThere is criticism that many users of the app use offensive racist and/or homophobic language, such as "No Asians", "No Blacks" or "No femmes".


    Damn it, I knew fags are homophobic!
    Seriously though, I know that the language isn't exactly nice to people, but I wouldn't go as far as to say it is racist or homophobic. It is personal preferences for who people are hooking up with. For instance, I am generally not attracted to black guys. There are every once in a while black guys who I would let do whatever they want to me, but for the most part it isn't the case. Would I be racist if I were to say I'm not attracted to blacks on Grindr? Although I haven't done that, I like to believe that it doesn't make me any more racist than saying I don't want to have sex with women makes me sexist, or saying I don't want to have sex with really obese people makes me weight-ist. I don't control who I am attracted to. As for the femmes thing, again, people could be a little nicer, but at least they are telling you up front what they like, unlike profiles where someone says, "Hit me up! I don't bite, and I love to talk to anyone!" and then never responds to anyone who isn't what they consider sexy as hell.


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    Aug 22, 2012 7:17 AM GMT
    Sound like those wiki folks are becoming a little bit too politically correct. They probably think gay guys shouldn't discriminate against women for sex either.
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    Aug 22, 2012 7:18 AM GMT
    not a major loss. why does everyone on this site think they are god's gift to the world..?

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    Aug 22, 2012 7:19 AM GMT
    i've said it before but grindr is the mobile version of the dark corner of the internet where the skeeziest of the skeeziest congregate.

    that article is spot on - nothing but racists and self-loathing homophobes on there. you're best deleting it, or use it to troll like i did (but was subsequently banned for) using this:

    G7Epe.png
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    Aug 22, 2012 7:22 AM GMT
    If you prefer vanilla ice cream does that mean you will never eat chocolate ice cream? No.
    Therefore it is not a "preference", it is RACIST.
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    Aug 22, 2012 7:26 AM GMT
    Borski1992 saidApparently the language on Grindr is commonly racist, and even more surprisingly homophobic. According to Wikipedia:
    WikipediaThere is criticism that many users of the app use offensive racist and/or homophobic language, such as "No Asians", "No Blacks" or "No femmes".


    Damn it, I knew fags are homophobic!
    Seriously though, I know that the language isn't exactly nice to people, but I wouldn't go as far as to say it is racist or homophobic. It is personal preferences for who people are hooking up with. For instance, I am generally not attracted to black guys. There are every once in a while black guys who I would let do whatever they want to me, but for the most part it isn't the case. Would I be racist if I were to say I'm not attracted to blacks on Grindr? Although I haven't done that, I like to believe that it doesn't make me any more racist than saying I don't want to have sex with women makes me sexist, or saying I don't want to have sex with really obese people makes me weight-ist. I don't control who I am attracted to. As for the femmes thing, again, people could be a little nicer, but at least they are telling you up front what they like, unlike profiles where someone says, "Hit me up! I don't bite, and I love to talk to anyone!" and then never responds to anyone who isn't what they consider sexy as hell.


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    Aug 22, 2012 7:28 AM GMT
    PieceOfMe saidi've said it before but grindr is the mobile version of the dark corner of the internet where the skeeziest of the skeeziest congregate.

    that article is spot on - nothing but racists and self-loathing homophobes on there. you're best deleting it, or use it to troll like i did (but was subsequently banned for) using this:

    G7Epe.png


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    Aug 22, 2012 9:03 AM GMT
    that bcoz ppl in grindr(mostly) r hungry for sex,so they just want to find someone they could fuck or fucked as fast as they can,tat why they put out these labels so tat they dun have to wait time to deal with the ppl they dun want to have sex with.

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    Aug 22, 2012 9:11 AM GMT
    I think we could really get into this as to why people tend to complain about things like,"NO BLACKS, NO ASIANS, ETC". I think it has something to do with SOME minorities feeling more let down when rejected by a white man, because to a lot of gay men of color a gay white man is almost the "Default". Meaning that some mean will take rejection from the worse than say a white man would from a ''colored'' person because white is the standard of beauty to a lot of people, as well as the image of a gay man that most people in the US see, and I also think that when colored gay men come into the gay community they expect to be welcomed with open arms when this isn't exactly the case, and I think it may be a bit of a shock to them. So people complain about it. It's not really one person's fault or the others, and it's not really like people can just snap and finger and automatically see each others points of views of why the other doesn't find him attractive.

    I think alot of things contribute to it. Some colored gay men may associate white men with beauty and power, probably in part because of the history of the country, where white men are at the top of the ladder in terms of beauty and power (at least historically and in some people mind today even), and in part because the media GENERALLY (not the capital letters) shows gay to mean = Middle class white gay man. We also have to consider the social history as well. Unfortunately, a white male saying "no blacks" will look racist even when it's not the intent, due to historically social factors (whites not wanting to have anything to do with blacks and such in earlier decades and such) and the idea that white males (in this case gay white males) are considered the top standard. In porn, the most expensive studios (and the one most people choose to watch) are VERY white and every now and then, latino. Gay Black men, or other colored men, don't get nearly the attention in the media( rather it be pornography or not) as gay white men. It also doesn't help that black men are always portrayed as thugs/ghetto in the media. (Cosby show does not count). And as we all know, the media has a vast hold on the mind of Americans...and unfortunately pornography has a huge influence on the standard of beauty in Gay America, more than Straight America in my opinion.

    This is not anyone's fault, it's not the fault of the gay white male that has his preference, or the gay black male that has had his feeling hurt. People are just products of their environments. Things like this though, are one of the many ills of living in an integrated multicultural society. My rule is though, don't post anything on your profile that you wouldn't say to someone's face. You can state your preference, but there are NICER ways to do it. "I really prefer white guys for the most part" sounds a lot more nice then,"NO BLACKS OR ASIANS".

    Black men may get away with saying "NO WHITES" for a variety of reasons:
    1. People still often associate black men with negativity in this day and age unfortunately. So some people tend not to care really.
    2. Black men are in the minority, and outside of major metro areas like DC, Atlanta, St. Loius, you really don't see many black men coming out in their profile and explicitly stating that (in my experience). This could also be just because there are less black men though.
    3. A gay white male may have never felt that he was in a position of disadvantage when compared with a gay black male. Flip this, and factor in the negative stigma the black community unfairly gets a bad rap for (poverty, jail, non-european features, etc) and there may be more of a sting for the black person that reads "NO BLACKS", than the white person that reads "NO WHITES". Because the stigma may still be on the black individual's mind when they get rejected, rather this feeling is true (meaning the other person is associating the individual with negative characteristics) or just a figment of the black individual's imagination is irrelevant, because that's how the black individual may feel regardless. The stigma is, unfortunately, self-inflicted a lot of times as well.
    There's many other reasons I could get into. This is a general response. People don't really get preference on an individual basis a lot of times. Many people simply like people that look more like themeselves, but again, that's one of the ills of living in a multicultural society. Some people in one group will always feel inferior to the majority. I think straight people complain more about interracial dating than gays do, but in my mind there are still "walls" in straight america to this day. But you still see IR straight couples in the media all the time, AND in public.
    At the same time, Straight people really don't depend on sites like Grindr and Jack'd to meet people on. And even if they did, I highly doubt they would put,"NO BLACKS", "NO WHITES". On some dating websites, I have seen few profiles from straight people like that. But they don't have hookup sites like us gay/bi men do, so I can't say my guess is right.

    None of this will go away overnight. If you choose to put negative things on your profile, you will get feedback about it sooner or later lol! There are easier, less offensive ways to state your racial/personality preference. And if you go into a community thinking that they still won't have their owen preferences/prejudices/ whatever the fuck you want to call it, you need to understand that even they still have their preferences/prejudices/whatever.

    There's too many factors as to why people act/react the way they do in this situation act/react differently. Once again, an ill of living in a multicultural society! It's not all holding hands together, or understand people's preferences. Multiracial societies, or at least this one in my opinion, does not really work like that.

    What I want to know is,"WHY IS THE MEDIA GIVING SO MUCH ATTENTION TO THE GAY WHITE MALE BUT THEN TURNS AROUNDS AND COMPLAINS ABOUT OFFENSIVE RACIAL MATERIAL ON GRINDR?" I know, i know, different people different agendas, Of course though, this is just the conspiracy nut inside me talking, not to be taken seriously.

    THIS IS ALL JUST MY OPINION.
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    Aug 22, 2012 10:30 AM GMT
    PieceOfMe saidi've said it before but grindr is the mobile version of the dark corner of the internet where the skeeziest of the skeeziest congregate.

    that article is spot on - nothing but racists and self-loathing homophobes on there. you're best deleting it, or use it to troll like i did (but was subsequently banned for) using this:

    G7Epe.png


    Grindr is just an app that men, all types of men, in contact with each other based on geolocation. Grindr is what you make of it.

    In my real life observation of those who bash grindr and the people who use it is that they are doing so to mask their own insecurities.
  • TheBizMan

    Posts: 4091

    Aug 22, 2012 10:35 AM GMT
    Cool story bro....

    Oh wait.. no it isn't

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    Aug 22, 2012 10:54 AM GMT
    So in order for me not to be judged as racist.. your saying that I have to "SAY" even though I don't "MEAN IT" that I am attracted to every race. icon_confused.gif

    It can be discrimination maybe, but people love to use the word racist all of the time and I do not like that. Plus, you go for what you prefer but there is a way to do it.

    A profile that reads:

    NO BLACKS


    is pretty much a page right out of the 60's KKK book, or off of a 50's restaurant window and can be taken as offensive. Just don't say anything at all or word it in a non-offensive way. Everyone has a preference and it is not racist. It is about the intent and the way that you go about presenting it to someone.

    (ex. I usually date out of race.. I think all guys are sexy but, seem to get into white guys a bit more.. etc.)

  • kuroshiro

    Posts: 786

    Aug 22, 2012 10:57 AM GMT
    PieceOfMe saidi've said it before but grindr is the mobile version of the dark corner of the internet where the skeeziest of the skeeziest congregate.

    that article is spot on - nothing but racists and self-loathing homophobes on there. you're best deleting it, or use it to troll like i did (but was subsequently banned for) using this:


    Wait... someone in the Buffalo area had the same exact profile up... and one of my friends did a Mean Girls banter with them 0_o;
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    Aug 22, 2012 1:39 PM GMT
    For me it's no different than any other app or website where gay guys can meet/talk with other gay guys. In my area, the majority of guys prefer to talk with other white guys. YAY for being screwed :]
  • Borski1992

    Posts: 153

    Aug 22, 2012 2:20 PM GMT
    kawaiidesu saidIf you prefer vanilla ice cream does that mean you will never eat chocolate ice cream? No.
    Therefore it is not a "preference", it is RACIST.

    Worst argument ever. Someone doesn't like a certain flavor of ice cream, they very well may avoid it. It all depends on how much the flavor affects them. My step brother eats any sort of ice cream, but as soon as peppermint is put in front of him, he will just let it melt. Is he ice cream racist?
    This doesn't have to do with anyone being racist, this has to do with people just not getting turned on. If you aren't turned on by something, there is no reason for people to judge you for it. It is like being judged because you aren't into bareback sex, or because you get turned off by the idea of getting pissed on. Everyone feels differently about what turns them on. For every person who isn't attracted to a certain race, there is one who is obsessed with it.

    I'm not the most masculine guy in the world, so when people say no femmes, for all I know, I very well could be their definition of femme. All I'm saying is that at least for me, it is better to have stamps on people so I know that I don't even want to bother than it is to be shooting in the dark and get a bunch of guys who are completely turned off and don't respond. It is the same as when someone gets turned down because they are too skinny, too hairy, too muscular, too fat, too fake'n'baked, and etc. IS it the best thing in the world that not everyone is attracted to everyone? No. But is it a fact? Yes.
    You can't simply change your preferences. Otherwise a lot of gay men wouldn't be gay men, and everything that the conservative right says about it being a choice would be right.

    ChangeofNamenot a major loss. why does everyone on this site think they are god's gift to the world..?


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    Not sure where you are going with this. I definitely don't think I'm God's gift to the world though. If I were, I wouldn't be single, struggling with student loans, driving a 96 grand am with 200,000 miles on it, or having any fights whatsoever with my parents.

    PieceOfMethat article is spot on - nothing but racists and self-loathing homophobes on there. you're best deleting it, or use it to troll like i did (but was subsequently banned for) using this:


    Are you serious? Not everybody on anything is the same. Yeah there are some assholes, but there are also a lot of great people. My best friend uses Grindr, and he doesn't hook up very often. He is definitely the furthest thing from a self loathing homophobe though.

    Would any of you who are bashing on me get mad if you met a white guy who would have sex with any minority, but not other white guys? I'm going to go out on a limb and say that you would say, "Fuck him, I don't care" or something like that.
    Furthermore, I'm guessing none of you have ever bashed on any subset of gay culture, and are willing to do anything sexually because you can turn on and off what makes you horny?


    I'm not attracted to most black men. That doesn't make me racist. I know I'm not racist, because even if I'm not attracted to someone, I know that they still deserve to find love, or even a filthy sweaty one night stand if that is what they are after. I would prefer to not have sex with anyone I'm not attracted to period, because I believe that they can find someone who is better for them in that they could be massively attracted to them.

    Zabotugi, I agree with you completely. There is a lot of bad wording; for me personally, I don't use that language, or anything for that matter. If someone starts talking to me, I give them a chance, and at the very least I can talk to them under the pretense of making new friends. And it is really sad that no matter where you go in America, most people think of gay men and go, "SEX AND THE CITY MEN!" Where everyone is white, or at least tries their best to fit into the upperclass white stereotypes.

    I also agree with Shell; there is a better way to do it, but it isn't necessarily racism. I don't know if anyone bashing me actually read the post, but I said twice that the language isn't good, or could be said better.
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    Aug 22, 2012 2:29 PM GMT
    The discussion of Grindr, RJ, other apps and the "preferences vs racism" has been talked about ad nauseum. Why bring it up again?

    Some will think the profile statements are racist or will not but MOST probably don't give a damn and move on to the next.

    Do you really care if someone thinks you're a racist? Oh wait, you're not cause you think minorities deserve love too. icon_rolleyes.gif
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    Aug 22, 2012 2:50 PM GMT
    Preference is the nicer way of saying discrimination in a way. It's all subjective so while someone can argue that it's just their preference and there is no malice. Another person can say that there is a hint of prejudice in those preferences and both would be right.


    In my opinion, although people may not like the association, the moment you say (no any race) it is a form of discrimination which is a form of prejudice. I'm just being technical.

    However I don't feel it's necessary that people should be so worried about someone who would ignore them because of their race. Not to demonize them but why would you want to associate with someone who held those views to begin with?(meaning why worry about someone who isnt interested in you)

    I know many people on here would refuse to associate themselves with people who would not hang out with gay people cuz they preferred to hang out with straight people.

    As I said many times, no one wants to be judged in an unfavorable way. No one wants to be seen as having prejudiced or potential racist thoughts but while we can try and justify all our actions we also should accept that there can be some truths in our actions.
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    Aug 22, 2012 2:56 PM GMT
    I don't get it. If you don't find someone attractive then just don't write them back, regardless of race. Why put some assy comments that can make you look like a douche? Grindr has the block function, if you don't find them attractive just block them, regardless of race
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    Aug 22, 2012 2:58 PM GMT
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    Taste The Rainbow !
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    Aug 22, 2012 3:50 PM GMT
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    http://www.realjock.com/gayforums/2232196
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    Aug 22, 2012 3:58 PM GMT
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    Taste The Rainbow !
    I would, but I don't like green people. They taste too Martiany. icon_razz.gif
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    Aug 22, 2012 4:01 PM GMT
    WTF is "grindr"?

    a kids toy?
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    Aug 22, 2012 4:39 PM GMT
    I think it would be a whole lot more tactful to say what you're looking for instead of what you're not looking for.

    For instance, I would write "I prefer abc" as opposed to "NO XYZ!!!" I'd be stating my preference instead of stating what I don't prefer or like.
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    Aug 22, 2012 4:46 PM GMT
    I don't have conversations with young masculine white men about grindr anymore.................

    It's like a world-vision kid trying to explain having money problems to mitt romney.