joel093 saidSo I've been talking to this guy and he is 31and I'm 19. He's coming to my area by the end of the month to meet me. I'm not sure what to expect since I've never messed around with a Guy. I'm also still a virgin. So can someone give me advice??
If you're attracted to guys his age, then that's not a big deal. If you have great communication with each other, and feel some attraction or a bond (some sparks!) between you, that matters more than age.
It's kind of a red flag that he's driving from far away to meet you. And I would say that even if he was 22.
Have you been talking on Skype/AIM/Google including on video chat? If yes, then I think you're probably gonna be just fine and don't have to worry, because you know what he's gonna be like. Do you feel like you're well on your way to being good friends at this point? The longer you've talked (I would say a month), the better because by that time you should have some pretty good emotional sense about him.
If not... I would take that step before the guy spends time and money driving out to see you. If he was randomly already going to be there for a business trip, vacation, see family, etc. that's one thing. But if the dude spends hours driving there just for you, you're going to feel some pressure to give in to whatever he wants. I don't like that dynamic.
Let's say you decide you don't want to do anything or maybe you just don't want to go through with the date for some reason. I don't think he'd do anything stupid, but, he would be disappointed I'm sure and would then have a long, lonely drive back home. I would respect your decision in that case (and he should too), but I would feel bad for the guy.
If you just want to get some sexual experience, you can probably do that with some cute local guys in your own town or somewhere nearby. It would be a lot less pressure on you and you'd be more in control. If you meet someone local and decide not to go through with the date or with something sexual because you change your mind, its not really a burden on you or them to just say goodbye and go your separate ways. Your first guy doesn't have to be perfect. (Although its nice when it works out that way!) You just need somebody you feel you can trust, who you're attracted to, and that you have some rapport with.
If you want to fill in the details for us, I guess we could help you better with advice. I can't speak for everyone here but if you'd rather private message somebody to talk about it (instead of writing it on the board), I'm always down to listen and try to help.