Delete please

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    Sep 12, 2012 5:10 PM GMT
    Delete
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    Sep 12, 2012 5:15 PM GMT
    Does pulling him into the bedroom with his back against your chest and his neck in an elbow lock count?
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    Sep 12, 2012 5:48 PM GMT
    I was suggesting 'abduction into the bedroom' so that by the time you get him into bed he'll already be stunned submissive. Whatever you'd do to him by then would make his adrenalin run. .... Interesting that you seem to have people watching you in bed sometimes.

    (recent article somewhere mentioning the tradition of men in Dagastan kidnapping girls for marriage.)
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    Sep 12, 2012 5:55 PM GMT
    I like the abduction into the bedroom idea. Depending on his size, throw him around a little if you can. Throw him onto the bed, grab him and get him onto the floor. Its all about taking control, if hes into it. Focus on his face during sex and get as rough as you can without causing him pain.
  • TheBizMan

    Posts: 4091

    Sep 12, 2012 5:57 PM GMT
    I think dominance is a built in trait. You either are..or you aren't. Pretending to be more dominant, in other words, trying to overcome your submissiveness and/or passiveness is far to eminent of a farce to me. Big turn off.

    Just a humble opinion of course icon_biggrin.gif
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    Sep 12, 2012 6:03 PM GMT
    nychard saidI like the abduction into the bedroom idea. Depending on his size, throw him around a little if you can. Throw him onto the bed, grab him and get him onto the floor. Its all about taking control, if hes into it. Focus on his face during sex and get as rough as you can without causing him pain.


    boy, if I see you here in the city be prepared for all the above. You'll love it and moan for more.
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    Sep 12, 2012 6:09 PM GMT
    TheBizMan saidI think dominance is a built in trait. You either are..or you aren't. Pretending to be more dominant, in other words, trying to overcome your submissiveness and/or passiveness is far to eminent of a farce to me. Big turn off.

    Just a humble opinion of course icon_biggrin.gif


    I have to agree with you.
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    Sep 12, 2012 6:15 PM GMT
    BuddyinNYC said
    nychard saidI like the abduction into the bedroom idea. Depending on his size, throw him around a little if you can. Throw him onto the bed, grab him and get him onto the floor. Its all about taking control, if hes into it. Focus on his face during sex and get as rough as you can without causing him pain.


    boy, if I see you here in the city be prepared for all the above. You'll love it and moan for more.



    Haha sounds like a good time. ;)

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    Sep 12, 2012 6:42 PM GMT
    I had a feeling you might be worried about your partner. Talk to him and see what his limits are. Some guys dont want to be roughed up until theyve tried it, and once on the rough train they dont ever want to get off!

    Some porn scenes might help with ideas

    And lube....
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    Sep 12, 2012 7:22 PM GMT
    Bullshit... everyone has an aggressive side to them. EVERYONE. You just need to find it and let it out.

    Most guys are uncomfortable being in charge, they experience anxiety and self doubt about it all the time. Am I doing it right, am I doing this or that, do they like it, should I be doing this, am I hurting them, am I bla bla bla.

    In my experience a guy can take a lot of rough stuff if your doing it right.

    You need to direct them, if you want them on there backs, grab their hip or leg and flip them over, the guy will know what your wanting and will help, You don't physically have to pick them up, turn them over, actually I've not met any man that can do that, even though tey say they can flip them over haha

    If you want them to do something you direct them to do it physically they usually get the point pretty fast and let you lead them there happily.

    If you grab them, actually grab them, use the strength you have, no gentle holds, no light touches, you wanna be in charge and you want them to know that, so you use your strength to do it, pin them to the bed, hold their hands back, push the guys legs apart or up around your waist or what ever it is.

    If they are doing something you don't want them to do, stop them and direct them elsewhere (but don't say you don't like it, just direct the attention somewhere else)

    Outta the sack I'm a complete push over (well, to a point anyway)

    Most important thing you can learn though is the listen and watch the guy your in bed with, he'll tell you everything without saying a word.. Unless he's the talking type but he'll still tell you everything
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    Sep 12, 2012 9:46 PM GMT
    It's amazing what you can do with your hands, legs, and thighs if you really want to be a little dominant--although it may take some practice if you're not naturally dominant. More power to you for trying to be creative.
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    Sep 12, 2012 10:01 PM GMT
    lilTanker saidIf you grab them, actually grab them, use the strength you have, no gentle holds, no light touches, you wanna be in charge and you want them to know that, so you use your strength to do it, pin them to the bed, hold their hands back, push the guys legs apart or up around your waist or what ever it is.

    file-117.jpg
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    Sep 12, 2012 10:22 PM GMT
    For me dominance and submissiveness depend on my level of comfort. I have a lot of anxiety and I seem to have a strange aversion to being touched by others I am not comfortable being close to or being physical with. :/

    I also don't have a lot of experience sexually (and the natural comfort that comes from being with another). I feel, at a loss, at times because-- like someone said above-- I am overthinking things or worried I am going to hurt someone.

    It also depends on my mood. Lately I have been feeling very submissive. I guess I just want someone to take charge and hold of me. Have their way with me, make me take it. Then there are other times when I just want to Use and Abuse my partner.
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    Sep 12, 2012 10:40 PM GMT
    I would say I'm an...ahem....expert in this subject. I have come across many of "doms" who aren't exactly the dominant type. Like someone said earlier, you either have it, or you don't.

    And of course to be dom you actually have to have a willing submissive guy. Once you have that, the rest should be easy.

    Just make sure this is what the bottom actually wants. I don't mind a dom guy but every now and then I'm just not in the mood to play this game.

    If you really need advice, just inbox me...icon_twisted.gif
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    Sep 14, 2012 12:51 AM GMT
    Oh boy.. Did you see lil tankers post..Spot on !!..

    So if you have a FB that is cool and will let you try things..That would be the perfect situation..

    I see your point about scaring someone...
    Every man has that "wild animal" burried somewhere..

    With that said..remember its all about Synchronization with your partner..
  • jayatl56

    Posts: 463

    Sep 14, 2012 12:26 PM GMT
    hmmm all very interesting stuff. In life/work, I'm fairly assertive. I stand my ground and I'm not scared to voice my opinion but in bed I want to be dominated. I've never really had anyone "dominate" me until a few days ago. I met a guy and we've seen each other a few times and ended up in bed this past weekend. He wasn't rough but he knew what he wanted and took it. He moved me where he wanted me and at one point he had me by my hair doing me doggy style. (I'm getting hard writing this) It was a fun night to say the least.