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    Sep 16, 2012 9:08 PM GMT
    .
  • FuriousGeorge

    Posts: 181

    Sep 16, 2012 9:26 PM GMT
    Sounds to me like you're doing everything right. He knows you're gay, you flat-out asked him about his sexuality and got an answer, and you're not being overbearing or creepy about it. That's about 10x more feedback than most of these "Should I go after my straight friend?" threads have.

    Arrange the dinner. Have fun and get to know him better. It's up to him if he wants to try anything. If you want to try to grease the wheels a bit, turn on your sexy full blast whenever you're around him, lol. Make sure you look good when you see him, and dare to be a little flirty if he's receptive to it. Just don't overdo it, haha.
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    Sep 16, 2012 9:40 PM GMT
    I would wait a few days before you text him again. He at least is open to the idea of being with a man, so thats a good sign. And the fact that we felt comfortable to share it with you is great too.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 16, 2012 9:44 PM GMT
    you should ask him when he's free for dinner.

    However don't make a move on him sexually.

    Wait a day or two (not three or four) send him a text asking him how he is bla bla bla whens he free for dinner (don't ask for lunch)

    If you end up back at your place or at his, just hang around, don't be nervous (that'll make him clamp up) just be relaxed and open.. he'll jump you when he's ready
  • FuriousGeorge

    Posts: 181

    Sep 16, 2012 10:02 PM GMT
    dude1991 said
    FuriousGeorge saidSounds to me like you're doing everything right. He knows you're gay, you flat-out asked him about his sexuality and got an answer, and you're not being overbearing or creepy about it. That's about 10x more feedback than most of these "Should I go after my straight friend?" threads have.

    Arrange the dinner. Have fun and get to know him better. It's up to him if he wants to try anything. If you want to try to grease the wheels a bit, turn on your sexy full blast whenever you're around him, lol. Make sure you look good when you see him, and dare to be a little flirty if he's receptive to it. Just don't overdo it, haha.


    I guess the question is that since I set up the first lunch, should I wait for him to get back to me about the next lunch/dinner? Or should I be aggressive and ask him out again?


    I don't see a problem with setting it up yourself. I wouldn't feel weird about doing that with a friend, and that's what you guys are. In fact, I'm willing to bet that he would feel more comfortable accepting your invitation rather than reaching out to you. Remember to just keep it friendly and casual, and make yourself available.
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    Sep 17, 2012 3:18 AM GMT
    Good advice so far. Just keep it friendly. He may end up not being ready to explore. He is right not to jump into something he has yet to understand.

    Sometimes guys have a hard time after a first sexual encounter with a man, they tend to shut down emotionally because they are questioning what it means, as well as dealing with internalized homophobia. My experience with first timers is that they usually don't freak out, but be prepared for him to be a bit detached for a little while if something sexual happens between you.

    You seem to be pretty level headed, so I'll bet he sees you as a pretty safe person to explore this with.
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    Sep 17, 2012 2:25 PM GMT
    Wow dude, you got some great comments. Read them carefully, outstanding advice and I agree with what these guys have said. Keep the rest of us up to date, we want to know how it goes! Good luck, sounds like you just met a nice friend at least!
  • Medjai

    Posts: 2671

    Sep 17, 2012 2:45 PM GMT
    At this point, you've probably got this guys entire perspective of gay relationships in your hands. Do it right and you could have an amazing relationship. Do it wrong and not only miss out of your end, but you'll likely jade his view of men for a very long time. No pressure.

    Just take it slow, and do things because they feel right. Convenience and hormones are the wrong motivators here.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 17, 2012 3:34 PM GMT
    I remember from years ago that most flirty guys were just a tease. Tread carefully, and don't get your hopes up too high.......
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 18, 2012 12:58 AM GMT
    I luv FuriousGeorge !! icon_redface.gif
  • FuriousGeorge

    Posts: 181

    Sep 18, 2012 1:05 AM GMT
    Anocxu saidI luv FuriousGeorge !! icon_redface.gif


    Wuuuuuv youuuuuu.
    Hehe, that just made me think of this:

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 18, 2012 1:06 AM GMT
    Medjai saidAt this point, you've probably got this guys entire perspective of gay relationships in your hands. Do it right and you could have an amazing relationship. Do it wrong and not only miss out of your end, but you'll likely jade his view of men for a very long time. No pressure.

    Just take it slow, and do things because they feel right. Convenience and hormones are the wrong motivators here.


    oh my god what the hell?? why would you say that?

    ignore him OP and good luck!
  • JosephC

    Posts: 92

    Sep 18, 2012 3:48 AM GMT
    FuriousGeorge saidSounds to me like you're doing everything right. He knows you're gay, you flat-out asked him about his sexuality and got an answer, and you're not being overbearing or creepy about it. That's about 10x more feedback than most of these "Should I go after my straight friend?" threads have.

    Arrange the dinner. Have fun and get to know him better. It's up to him if he wants to try anything. If you want to try to grease the wheels a bit, turn on your sexy full blast whenever you're around him, lol. Make sure you look good when you see him, and dare to be a little flirty if he's receptive to it. Just don't overdo it, haha.
    Best response! Listen to this man he is wise.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 18, 2012 4:21 AM GMT
    Just take it slow and be a gentleman and see how it goes. This might turn into a relationship, a friend with benefits or just a friendship. Sounds like there's a mutual attraction so see how it goes.

    Good luck!
  • easterndude69

    Posts: 632

    Sep 18, 2012 4:32 AM GMT
    It seems like you might have a chance here. Don't force yourself onto him, be slow and gentle about it. He's at least curious and admits it which is good news. Try dinner with him, maybe ask him if there's anything he ever wanted to try with a guy or something. Be supportive of his choice and don't look disappointed when he claims to not be interested in something; he might just need time to think it over. Good luck!
  • coolarmydude

    Posts: 9190

    Sep 18, 2012 4:36 AM GMT
    whipped+cream.jpg
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 18, 2012 4:42 AM GMT
    I had a similar experience; we hung out a few times and then were hanging out almost every day that went on for about three months before it culminated into anything. Mind you there were lots of fun, flirty, and awkward moments in-between. . . along with the occasional wrestling at the gym, lol.

    It was the best dating experience I ever had because we had such a great relationship built up before we ever kissed, or had sex. We were only together 9 months but hands down the best relationship I've been in.

    So just be patient and get to know him, if there is a spark there it will surface, just act normal and don't put too much pressure on him, let him find himself.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 19, 2012 8:57 AM GMT
    Be patient, and if you bump into him somewhere be polite.

    Everyone finds themselves at a different pace, not saying he’s gay or not just saying he’s entitled to his own path.
  • FuriousGeorge

    Posts: 181

    Oct 02, 2012 3:50 AM GMT
    dude1991 saidSo it turns out that the "Straight" guy I was into is asexual.


    Lame. icon_rolleyes.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 02, 2012 3:53 AM GMT
    dude1991 saidSo it turns out that the "Straight" guy I was into is asexual.


    icon_lol.gif he doesn't know what he's missing hahaha
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 02, 2012 3:54 AM GMT
    yah know most people are straight right? why is this a surprise to gay guys lmao
  • Dxyankee

    Posts: 307

    Oct 02, 2012 4:12 AM GMT
    Not everything has to be about sex.
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    Oct 02, 2012 4:18 AM GMT
    as i was reading this thread and it made me remember something from my teens, i once fucked a guy whose wife was in labor with his baby (maybe even a second one, i am not sure). the most amazing thing is that i did with only saliva (i'm not small lol) and it was his first time, we were drunk and i guess he wanted it so much. but now i think i might only got him cause i was 17 y.o. then and he was in his late 20's. so finally he was getting fucked like he dreamed but by someone very young and little, so it doesn't make me a bigger man than he is. and yet, he was strangely quiet after the whole thing was over. i don't know, i think it was one of the brightest memories and bed-wins of my past life, when i was still a whore. icon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 02, 2012 9:21 PM GMT
    Asexual? (i.e, having no sexual desires)


    or Pansexual?? (i.e, attracted to multiple genders/partners)

    If the former: Sucks to be you.

    If the latter: Enjoy the ride!!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 02, 2012 9:29 PM GMT
    There will be others..you'll be ok..
    How about a gay guy next time huh?