What do you say after sex thats less then stellar

  • FreshstartDE

    Posts: 21

    Sep 21, 2012 12:47 AM GMT
    I got a kick out of reading about the best compliments people have gotten after sex.
    This made me think about another situation.
    About 6 months ago I had a few too many drinks and fooled around with a friend of mine. It was just plain awful. How does a 40 something year old gay man not know how to give a blow job or kiss? I swear he was trying to file his teeth with my dick. I was sore for days. It was probably the worst sex I ever had.
    To make matters worse, he thought it was so hot. I've felt bad ever since because now I feel like I need to avoid him and I have no desire to visit that again.
    So the question is... Do you tell a guy the truth? Offer him pointers? Just pretend it was good (which is what I did)?
    I'm not talking about guys you just arent compatible with ( 2 tops... or 2 bottoms) I mean guys who seem to have no idea how to make you feel good.
    I'm anxious to hear some opinions and or experiences.
  • thadjock

    Posts: 2183

    Sep 21, 2012 1:56 AM GMT
    FreshstartDE saidI got a kick out of reading about the best compliments people have gotten after sex.
    This made me think about another situation.
    About 6 months ago I had a few too many drinks and fooled around with a friend of mine. It was just plain awful. How does a 40 something year old gay man not know how to give a blow job or kiss? I swear he was trying to file his teeth with my dick. I was sore for days. It was probably the worst sex I ever had.
    To make matters worse, he thought it was so hot. I've felt bad ever since because now I feel like I need to avoid him and I have no desire to visit that again.
    So the question is... Do you tell a guy the truth? Offer him pointers? Just pretend it was good (which is what I did)?
    I'm not talking about guys you just arent compatible with ( 2 tops... or 2 bottoms) I mean guys who seem to have no idea how to make you feel good.
    I'm anxious to hear some opinions and or experiences.


    it's not what you say after it's what you should have said during....

    why didn't u just tell him to stop chewing on your cock when he was doing it?

    how can a 40 something gay guy not know how to communicate during sex?
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    Sep 21, 2012 2:33 AM GMT
    Unless he asks I wouldn't bring it up.
  • FreshstartDE

    Posts: 21

    Sep 21, 2012 1:07 PM GMT
    thadjock said
    FreshstartDE saidI got a kick out of reading about the best compliments people have gotten after sex.
    This made me think about another situation.
    About 6 months ago I had a few too many drinks and fooled around with a friend of mine. It was just plain awful. How does a 40 something year old gay man not know how to give a blow job or kiss? I swear he was trying to file his teeth with my dick. I was sore for days. It was probably the worst sex I ever had.
    To make matters worse, he thought it was so hot. I've felt bad ever since because now I feel like I need to avoid him and I have no desire to visit that again.
    So the question is... Do you tell a guy the truth? Offer him pointers? Just pretend it was good (which is what I did)?
    I'm not talking about guys you just arent compatible with ( 2 tops... or 2 bottoms) I mean guys who seem to have no idea how to make you feel good.
    I'm anxious to hear some opinions and or experiences.


    it's not what you say after it's what you should have said during....

    why didn't u just tell him to stop chewing on your cock when he was doing it?

    how can a 40 something gay guy not know how to communicate during sex?
    lol... valid point.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 21, 2012 6:50 PM GMT
    "Get out."
  • 4another

    Posts: 20

    Sep 22, 2012 5:19 AM GMT
    thadjock said
    FreshstartDE saidI got a kick out of reading about the best compliments people have gotten after sex.
    This made me think about another situation.
    About 6 months ago I had a few too many drinks and fooled around with a friend of mine. It was just plain awful. How does a 40 something year old gay man not know how to give a blow job or kiss? I swear he was trying to file his teeth with my dick. I was sore for days. It was probably the worst sex I ever had.
    To make matters worse, he thought it was so hot. I've felt bad ever since because now I feel like I need to avoid him and I have no desire to visit that again.
    So the question is... Do you tell a guy the truth? Offer him pointers? Just pretend it was good (which is what I did)?
    I'm not talking about guys you just arent compatible with ( 2 tops... or 2 bottoms) I mean guys who seem to have no idea how to make you feel good.
    I'm anxious to hear some opinions and or experiences.


    it's not what you say after it's what you should have said during....

    why didn't u just tell him to stop chewing on your cock when he was doing it?

    how can a 40 something gay guy not know how to communicate during sex?


    Because some people don't like to be complete douche bags and create an uncomfortable scene in the middle of sex.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 22, 2012 5:25 AM GMT
    "Where's the remote." or "Make me a sandwich".
  • thirdoz

    Posts: 69

    Sep 22, 2012 6:06 AM GMT
    "You're awful". or "I'm just stating facts here, the earth orbits the sun, it's 66 degrees outside, and you're fucking awful".

    or, offer some pointers and maybe get some good head too.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 22, 2012 7:11 AM GMT
    Was your friend drunk too? Maybe he'd be better at it if he's sober?

    If it's been 6 months since you guys hooked up and there hasn't been another get-together, don't you think he'd have gotten the hint already?
  • thadjock

    Posts: 2183

    Sep 22, 2012 1:21 PM GMT
    4another said
    Because some people don't like to be complete douche bags and create an uncomfortable scene in the middle of sex.


    communicating to your partner what turns you on or off is what makes for great sex. If you haven't had sex with the guy before how is he supposed to read your mind about what you're into or what feels good to you. I don't happen to mind a little rougher play but some guys arent' into that.

    What does make you a complete douchbag is laying there enduring pain or being turned off by what he's doing and not saying anything because you're afraid of "creating an uncomfortable scene in the middle of sex" (NEWSFLASH: at that point, YOU'RE AREADY IN ONE!) and after the fact claiming he's no good at sex because he didn't innately know how to push all your buttons with the right pressure in the right sequence.

    and if in the case of the OP, it was bad sex from a drunk romp with a guy you never would have hooked up with otherwise, that's on u, so be a man and own it, u don't avoid him, you tell him it was your mistake and ur still friends just without b's