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What do you guys prefer and why? Do you prefer to live in areas that are heavily gay? For example I think in Fort Lauderdale the highly gay area is called Wilton Manors. In San Francisco it's the Castro. In Chicago it's Boystown. Although in Chicago the gays have migrated to Andersonville quite a bit which is a neighborhood close by but just north of Boystown.

I live within walking distance to boystown. But I rarely ever go. I simply moved here to buy a small condo that was within my budget, although not nearly the level of square footage I'd prefer. Most high rise buildings have been converted to condos. These buildings have studios which are more affordable than living much further west where studio condos are basically nonexistent. So that is how I wound up here. But I personally like to be in a neighborhood that has a mixture of orientations, ethnicities, cultures, etc. Even though I am quite close to Boystown there is a hugely diverse population in my area. I like it, I think it also keeps me more diverse and open.

I know that some men really love being in the heart of a gay ghetto. Maybe they somehow feel safer. I'm not absolutely certain but thought I'd get some of your feedback here.

I bought my house in Hollywood Hills some time ago and although it is fairly close to boystown , I am NOT a bar or club person so I rarely go to WeHo. it may as well be in another city.
I love being close to the freeways but still having some rural feel.
Yes there are some other gay people here but it is the diversity that I love here.

I don't live in the gay ghetto either. I prefer to live my life realistically, with a mixture of all kinds of people. I believe it is regressive to limit oneself to gay neighbourhoods, social gatherings, sports teams and services.

I participate in aspects of gay culture but expand my horizons to the rest of the world too.

One of the things that appealed to us about Austin is that there wasn't really a defined "ghetto." It's a lot of fun to visit WeHo, etc, but I think it might be frustrating to live there. My sexuality is just one part of who I am. I couldn't handle 24/7 SuperGay mode.

I don't live in any kind of ghetto. I feel safe and secure being around people who treat me a certain way regardless of their sexual preference. They are pros and cons for both and it all comes down to personal comfort.

I'm a well traveled mixed guy and I enjoy being surrounded by diversity. Idon't like things to be vanilla. LOL.

I could NOT live in any Gay Ghetto!! I'd rather live in the reality of this world..... But then again I do live IN SF!

LOL.

Well, I don't live in a gay ghetto. I don't think I would want to. I'm used to living the way I do.

When I moved up to the Portland area, I chose where to live based on proximity to my job, what I could afford, and that I wanted a single level in case I needed to take care of one of my parents. When I bought my place in 2001, the market was very hot here, so I had an offer in the same day the house went on the market (read: not a lot of time to consider).

The "gay ghetto" is close to downtown. Nice place to visit, but I'm actually more of the "house with yard" kind of guy. I lived in a highrise in Eugene with an incredible view of the Coast Range when I was in grad school. When I didn't have homework during the rainy Oregon winter, I nearly went nuts because I didn't have a garage or workshop where I could do projects.

I bought a house from the 60s that needed some work, but made sure that it was within an easy walk to the light rail line that can take me downtown or on further to the airport. Saturday mornings I can also walk to an amazing farmers' market with damn cute farmers.

Nike, Intel, SolarWorld, and other companies are in the area. There is a good mix of gay/ straight here, as well as a large number of folks from India. Safety is not a concern.

here in new orleans, the area adjacent to the french quarter, called marigny, is VERY gay friendly, as is the area next to marigny called bywater.

marigny and bywater merger into each other, similar style 1880-1920's historic home districts, restaurants, coffee shops, gay-freindly neighborhood bars.....a very pleasant place to live and walk around in.

the french quarter is for tourists and rich old queens.

I like a good mix of people...socially it's easier of course to live in the Gayborhood... but I've always lived about 10 mins away from the 'hood. It's better that way.

There really aren't any gay neighborhoods in New York anymore. The cost of living in the historically gay neighborhoods has kept many gays away.

That said, it's my dream to live in the West Village.

26mileman saidI don't live in the gay ghetto either. I prefer to live my life realistically, with a mixture of all kinds of people. I believe it is regressive to limit oneself to gay neighbourhoods, social gatherings, sports teams and services.

I participate in aspects of gay culture but expand my horizons to the rest of the world too.

Quoted for truth and agreement.
Cincinnati doesn't really have a gayborhood, though we have several gay heavy ones - downtown, Clifton, Northside (the most official gayborhood we have,) Hyde Park and Mt Adams. However, the gays here are far more widespread and rolled into the general population than in some other midwest cities, in my experience at least.

Gay Ghetto = Ghaytto? Gadzooks!

I prefer the Vietnamese Ghetto. Other than randomly killing stray cats and then feeding them to the public, their restaurants by far are the best. And their frozen yogurt places put Pink Berry to shame. In fact, I think Pink Berry is a cult, even worse than Scientology.

lilmaninsc saidWell, I don't live in a gay ghetto. I don't think I would want to. I'm used to living the way I do.

living in an area with a high concentration of gays does not change the way you live

Hunter9 said

lilmaninsc saidWell, I don't live in a gay ghetto. I don't think I would want to. I'm used to living the way I do.

living in an area with a high concentration of gays does not change the way you live

Yes it does. It makes you hate gay people more.

Living in SF it's hard to get away from "the gays." I'm not opposed to living in the gay ghetto, however, I'm not sure I could take being in "the scene" all the time. Living in diversity is what keeps me going. Without it, life becomes pretty stale.

I would definitely prefer to live in a highly gay neighborhood. ...the more gay the better. ...Straight people are nice enough, but I dont relate to their lives. ...I much prefer to be around gays with whom I can relate and communicate.

Plus ...I can only think of some many excuses for why I cant attend little Becky's school recitals. ...Oh yes, I did. ...I worked this cancer thing every which way I could to keep the neighbors at bay ... HAHAHAHAHAHAHA ...

Being the only fag in the village. There is no gay ghetto around here, and we all, want to keep it that way too!

I'm the only fag in the village.

jakebenson said

Hunter9 said

lilmaninsc saidWell, I don't live in a gay ghetto. I don't think I would want to. I'm used to living the way I do.

living in an area with a high concentration of gays does not change the way you live

Yes it does. It makes you hate gay people more.

care to elaborate? living in west hollywood has not changed me the least... except for perhaps being a bit more on alert for the looks other guys are shooting me. what the fuck happened to you?

Caslon6000 saidI would definitely prefer to live in a highly gay neighborhood. ...the more gay the better. ...Straight people are nice enough, but I dont relate to their lives. ...I much prefer to be around gays with whom I can relate and communicate.

yeh u rite!

here in the marigny/bywater neighborhoods fo new orleans i can be "me" and be at ease in social situations.

when i go back to my mother's area of the suburbs i am constantly monitoring my behavior.....don't stare at a cute man too long or too intently, monitoring my language and body posture for too much "geighness"...

at my local coffee shops and restaurants and bars i can dress how i want, say what i feel, nod, smile and stare at guys i find attractive and enjoy their reflected attentions, read the ambush magazine.....

i'd love to try living in a gay area to experience it once

Hunter9 said

lilmaninsc saidWell, I don't live in a gay ghetto. I don't think I would want to. I'm used to living the way I do.

living in an area with a high concentration of gays does not change the way you live

Hmmm, a gayborhood creates greater awareness and comfort, as well as a sense of community, which enables people to better adjust sometimes. I would imagine a rural country queer from nowhere Ohio who moves to WeHo or Chelsea might find the way he lives changed quite a bit. Not necessarily his values and interests, but his ability to relate, to understand himself within the social context of sexuality/dating, etc.

Love living in a gay state and a gay area here in Palm Springs. No worry about being who you are and discrimination.

I always find it interesting about the guys who want to remain hidden in their closets, and feel more comfortable in a straight society. Guess they are uncomfortable with who they are.

Hm... Would survive in any of em, but would prefer an even mix. An all-gay neighborhood would keep me up all night with the bitchfights and the tacky landscaping would kill my imagination.

I grew up in a 'gay ghetto'-- Palm Springs. And I really liked it, it made coming out really easy and it was good to see lots of people like me at that time.

Now I live in New York and I would love to live in Hell's Kitchen or Chelsea-- probably Chelsea as Hell's Kitchen is too close to the tourist trap clusterfuck known as Times Square. I think it would be fun to experience living in a gayer part of town as an adult as a contrast to what it was like growing up but never really being a part of the action.

Ultimately, I'm more motivated to live in a nice apartment or house that is convenient for all aspects of my life, not just my sexual orientation. And that's why I live on the Upper East Side-- close to work, lots of restaurants, on a reliable subway line and, above all, it's totally quiet at night-- a luxury in this city!

It's all a matter of taste I guess. For me personally being in SF I decided to purchase outside the "gay ghetto" in the Marina Dist.

I live in a suburb of Phoenix - which is one of the largest cities in the country. We have a great mix of people and I like knowing there are gay guys here and there - all around me. For the most part, gay guys take great care of their houses - the right colors, landscaping, re-doing houses in style - and I know that mainstream society (straights) respect and admire what "we" can do for a neighborhood.

With that being said, do I want to live in a gay ghetto area - with just 100% gays everywhere? In some ways it might be cool - having "family" everywhere you go.

Jockbod48 saidI live in a suburb of Phoenix - which is one of the largest cities in the country. We have a great mix of people and I like knowing there are gay guys here and there - all around me. For the most part, gay guys take great care of their houses - the right colors, landscaping, re-doing houses in style - and I know that mainstream society (straights) respect and admire what "we" can do for a neighborhood.

With that being said, do I want to live in a gay ghetto area - with just 100% gays everywhere? In some ways it might be cool - having "family" everywhere you go.

Yeah, I live in a suburb of Phoenix as well called Kierland in North Scottsdale--but around the valley, there really isn't a gay area of town and I definitely mind it. The gay bars around here are pretty much spread out as Phoenix is a pretty big city. When I use to live in Boston, the South End was considered the "gay ghetto" of Boston. I never felt unsafe or out of place in the South End. Doesn't really matter if there's a "gay ghetto" or not--it's who you are that's more important.

("The More You know" star flashes with the sound bit).

I live in Little Portugal, so all my neighbors are little old ladies. But Montreal is pretty gay friendly in general.

We live in the suburbs. I love it because everyone is different. We are the gay guys on out block and on the next street there are lesbians. We all get a long really well. We get along a lot better with the straight neighbors then we do with the lesbians. We all share each others tools and watch out for each others houses. Our neighbors have the keys to our house and we have the keys to theirs. We look after each others animals when we go away. We have been neighbors for 18 years. We watched their kids grow up. They call us their other 2 dads. I wouldn’t change a thing.

Interesting responses. I was surprised to read some of your responses. For the few of you I've seen on here and by reading your posts in the past I would have anticipated different responses from a few of you all. Thanks for the feedback. It was good to read about your preferences and why you chose them.

GeorgeE saidWe live in the suburbs. I love it because everyone is different. We are the gay guys on out block and on the next street there are lesbians. We all get a long really well. We get along a lot better with the straight neighbors then we do with the lesbians. We all share each others tools and watch out for each others houses. Our neighbors have the keys to our house and we have the keys to theirs. We look after each others animals when we go away. We have been neighbors for 18 years. We watched their kids grow up. They call us their other 2 dads. I wouldn’t change a thing.

Wow, that sounds so pleasant. =)
Makes me think of Desperate Housewives' community, but without the bad vibe dramas.

I'd want to live somewhere where there are -more- gay people, but not to the point where you don't have straight people anymore.

NoNameGuy saidThere really aren't any gay neighborhoods in New York anymore. The cost of living in the historically gay neighborhoods has kept many gays away.

That sounds like Houston. I live in Montrose, but mainly because it is an easy drive to work. However, Montrose is being overrun with these overpriced three floor townhomes that spring up like weeds - and that no one can afford.

I did it totally backwards! I live in a very hetro part of Baltimore, but I work in the gayberhood (only a fifteen minute drive away).

I bought the house before I was totally aware that I was gay. I'm still very happy there (and my boyfriend moved in a few years ago and he seems to like it okay as well).

Don't know if I would have chosen differently if I had bought the house later in life or not.

When we choose, where we wanted to live, we choose the house first not caring if it was gay or hetro neighborhood. The house sold us the moment we walked onto the property. Our neighbours are straight and are the most friendly bunch of people.

I live in Wilton Manors, which is actually a separate city from Fort Lauderdale but it does abut it.

I like the street life. Aside from South Beach, it's one of the few pedestrian-friendly towns in South Florida. The town is only about 35% gay (which is a lot) so there is a mix of old straight people, young families, and gays, a large percentage of them coupled. There's also a singles scene, not that I have time or inclination to participate. I work too much.

I really wouldn't mind living in a more densely gay-populated area but find the vibe is usually not at all in line with what excites me. West Hollywood, for example, is like a bunch of overpriced, mediocre restaurants and repetitive stores that all play the same remixed top 40 music over and over and over. Gay ghettos tend to not have a ton of character.

I would love it though if there were a more urban, alternative, independent gay-centric area, like a gay Silverlake.

I love gay people. They are my tribe, and being around them feels like home. Even though the cities I have lived in have very small ghayttos (Thanks BearCub) I still prefer them over other parts of the city.

I live in a relatively gay area (East Lakeview) but I consider that only one positive attribute of the neighborhood. I have a 24 hour diner on my corner, easy express bus access to downtown, good "L" access, Wrigley Field, restaurants, stores, gym, and a huge park all within a few minutes walk. It's also inhabited by a nice variety of people. Having lived in the West Loop which is practically devoid of any of these characteristics I revised my neighborhood requirements and moved.

Plus if I get convinced to go out with my friends it is invariably somewhere in Boystown or Andersonville so it is easy to get home.

K1, might you be referring to "Melrose Diner" on Broadway?

muchmorethanmuscle saidK1, might you be referring to "Melrose Diner" on Broadway?

Yes, that would be it.

I have in the past lived inner city, where a lot of gay ghettos seem to be. But I'm sure with time this will change.

But by living in a gay ghetto, can't say it made me a better person, in any way. But living out in the real world, in the outer suburbs. This has helped me grow into an individual, and not a clone. I'm happy with that.

Hunter9 said

jakebenson said

Hunter9 said

lilmaninsc saidWell, I don't live in a gay ghetto. I don't think I would want to. I'm used to living the way I do.

living in an area with a high concentration of gays does not change the way you live

Yes it does. It makes you hate gay people more.

care to elaborate? living in west hollywood has not changed me the least... except for perhaps being a bit more on alert for the looks other guys are shooting me. what the fuck happened to you?

Oh, you're probably one of the reasons why I don't live there.

moving on...

I lived in San Francisco for twenty years, but never lived in the Castro. After my bar phase, I didn't even go there very often. The wonderful openness of the Bay Area made me feel comfortable wherever I was, including some of my jobs. Over time, the Castro has become more straight and way too expensive.

If I lived in another city, like San Diego, maybe the gay area would be where I would want to live.

If and when I move back to the Bay Area, Temescal (in Oakand) or Albany/Berkeley would be nice. Not specifically gay, just nice.

I did live in the Chicago gay ghetto for 11 years. It got old and tired. Now, I live in Edgewater ( 3 miles more North) which has a nice mix of gays and straights.