Give me your constructive criticism!

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 03, 2012 8:51 PM GMT
    So in my spare time, which isn't often, I like to write orchestral music. I know there are quite a few musicly-inclined people on here and I would like to know your thoughts on my work, and how the music flows.

    I mashed up one of my songs with a Lord of the Rings video. YES, I realize it probably doesn't go together..quite how it should, but I just wanted SOMETHING it could go with, and at times I think it does go with it well.

    Some other issues I already know about:
    ~Marimba and vibes very "thud-like" in the beginning
    ~The audio cuts parts in the beginning at times becuase my computer can't handle it all at once
    ~The ending is a trainwreck, the piece isn't finished and i didn't intend for it to match up with the song's ending.icon_redface.gif

    So please let me know what you think of the piece! like I said, it's not done :p






    P.S. Comments are much appreciated!icon_smile.gif
  • barriehomeboy

    Posts: 2475

    Oct 04, 2012 12:33 AM GMT
    I'm a writer. We grow as we create. Good start for you publishing your work.
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    Oct 04, 2012 12:48 AM GMT
    I liked it too (for use in movie screenplay-scores).

    Would be great if you could break into that field!!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 04, 2012 12:51 AM GMT
    thankyou guysicon_smile.gif ive always thought itd be cool to one day write scores for movies as a hobby.
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    Oct 04, 2012 12:52 AM GMT
    Even though you asked to hear from the "musicly-inclined" only.......I actually think it was pretty good. icon_cool.gif Had a few rough spots, but really good.

    Are you studying music now? And are you planning on making this a career? You obviously have a talent for it. icon_wink.gif

    Tritsan
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    Oct 04, 2012 12:55 AM GMT
    Good stuff!

    Additional instruments and parts could add more depth and roundness.
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    Oct 04, 2012 1:00 AM GMT
    Impressive altogether. I thought the ending starting about 2:11 was well done, there seemed to be an additional 4th level.. I may have to listen again.. but the debates are about to begin..
    later
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    Oct 04, 2012 1:10 AM GMT
    musclefetish1 saidEven though you asked to hear from the "musicly-inclined" only.......I actually think it was pretty good. icon_cool.gif Had a few rough spots, but really good.

    Are you studying music now? And are you planning on making this a career? You obviously have a talent for it. icon_wink.gif

    Tritsan


    I intended for everyone to give input, I enjoy critics :p and thanks for thinking it sounded good. I am actually majoring in Microbiology.. music is just a hobby :/



    GAMRican said

    Good stuff!

    Additional instruments and parts could add more depth and roundness.



    The program I use doesn't allow for full fuctionality of the pizzicatos for the strings, marccatos(?), all the accents and change in dynamics.. I feel I already am using too many instruments.. which is why I am crashing my computer recording it lol, but I can try some new sounds for teh piece with new instuments.



    beneful1 said

    Impressive altogether. I thought the ending starting about 2:11 was well done, there seemed to be an additional 4th level.. I may have to listen again.. but the debates are about to begin..
    later



    I'm actually really bad at debating when to end a piece. I'm full of ideas, but then I don't know when to stop adding and adding.. it comes with being a perfectionist. I've yet to find a solution to blend the two sections together. My idea was after the piccolo and oboe duet was to switch key and basically repeat the main theme again with a twist. But I always feel bad for teh bass voices becuase they always play repetative licks over and over haha :p I try to mix it up am little..
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    Oct 04, 2012 1:40 AM GMT
    Farmjock said I'm actually really bad at debating when to end a piece. I'm full of ideas, but then I don't know when to stop adding and adding.. it comes with being a perfectionist. I've yet to find a solution to blend the two sections together.

    Just a thought -- if giving shape to a piece is a problem you could take a look at traditional forms like sonata or rondo to see how they were used to take contrasting themes and bind them into a convincing whole.
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    Oct 04, 2012 2:02 AM GMT
    hi Farmjock, good effort on your piece : )

    After a rough listening here's my opinion:
    -I thought the beginning could even be a bit slower. The introduction of different layers of instruments sounds a bit rushed to me so maybe a slower tempo may help?
    - allow a broadened pause at 1:05--> give a bit of time to allow the intro's theme to really sink in and linger in our minds and then go into the dramatic stuff
    - i really like your use of ostinato. It gives a nice driving force : )
    - when you return back to the initial motif, i wouldn't mind hearing it slightly changed. Instead of quaver beats maybe make them crotchets? or something. it adds interest and it feels like you need something broadened out, almost like the music is quivering away from all that powerful stuff in the middle.

    It's a good start! I think the transitions from the sections just needs a bit of work : )

    oh and also during that dramatic part, maybe start off with something like cellos playing the 'dun dun dun dun' quaver beats (at 1:05 )and then allow the violins/violas to join in. Building in the pitch could sound nice!

    i could be very wrong but hopefully that's somewhat helpful
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    Oct 04, 2012 5:04 PM GMT
    Thanks for the ideas icon_smile.gif