FWB

  • TallguyNLA

    Posts: 440

    Oct 04, 2012 6:42 AM GMT
    Do you have a "friend with benefits?"
    Be honest!
    have you done this and found that it was more successful than a relationship, or has it been a complete disaster?
    Are you in a relationship now and have this going on?
    What are the "benefits?"
    what are the cons you have experienced?
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    Oct 04, 2012 6:49 AM GMT
    I've had several FWB throughout my life. I had a whole rotation going on in DC with 4 guys after the break up. Figured it was easier and much less sluttier than going out trying to find a different trick everytime I was in the mood. One guy actually is a semi-porn star.

    In Miami, I have one guy that I'm seeing regularly. He is HAWT but is in a relationship. I have no fantasies about being running off and being in a relationship with him though, we just seem much better off as fuckbuds. And yes, his boyfriend knows. I'm also "talking" to this other guy, but I actually see him as more than just a fuck bud bc I can totally see my self in a relationship with him. I'm just taking it slowly with this guy because I don't want to screw it up.......


    As long as both partners go in knowing what is expected there should be no hard feelings. When I left DC, I had a "farewell fuck buddy tour" with my guys.(no, not all at the same time) And they were all actually very sweet. They were like "Awwww I'm going to miss your little Mexican ass".....I teared up a little......icon_cry.gif
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    Oct 04, 2012 10:54 AM GMT
    Yeah i've had a few FWB's.

    I think I used to prefer having this type of 'arrangement' because I wasn't really ready for a committed relationship, and felt that I had a lot of self-evolving to undergo before I could fully, happily commit and be, in my mind at least, a worthy partner to somebody whom I really wanted to be with for the long run.

    FWB's are great if both people involved are totally honest and vocal about their expectations from the start and periodically throughout, and are mutually aligned in their wants/needs from each other.

    I suppose it is a bit like having a 'part-time', ad hoc, private, pseudo relationship, with none of the commitments, responsibilities or pressures (predominantly), but conversely, (for most people) no full personal security or emotional and life fulfilment.

    They are, generally, like eating fast-food take-out snacks when on-the-go, as opposed to well prepared, favourite home cooked meals.

    They have their place, but their expiration date is a limited one (one will outgrow the arrangement before the other/ will move/will find somebody else/grow bored of the limitation/develop more attached feelings than the other et al).

    I'm pretty happy with the few I've had, some of them will be guys that I always regard as true friends in the future, but I'm ready to move on to the real deal now, in that sexual-committed-relationship facet.

    Well, with the right guy (for me) of course, who, as coincidence would have it, I think I may have very recently met, and surprisingly enough, the attraction seems mutual ;P - but I'm not about to jump-the-gun just yet and *jinx* it...

    Still, sometimes something clicks and ignites instantaneously (and occasionally mutually- how rare!), and it's hard to (want to) rationalise against such a lovely, invigorating and rare phenomenon ;]
  • Trepeat

    Posts: 546

    Oct 04, 2012 5:46 PM GMT
    I'm fond of the FB scenario. Sometimes there are guys you like to have sex with that just aren't cut out for a relationship. And, if there's no one in your life currently worth committing to for a full blown relationship, it's nice to have someone you're familiar and comfortable with to help take of your needs.
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    Oct 05, 2012 1:10 PM GMT
    I have several FWBs. To a very large extent, it's safer to have regular FWBs than to have multiple one-nighters. The only risk, based on my personal experience, is that some guys have a tendency to get emotionally attached even if they knew going in that it's only a FWB arrangement. My advice is to make everything clear and agree on specific rules/guidelines before you enter into a FWB arrangement. Otherwise, FWB arrangements are great. Notably, my regular FWBs and I exchange STD/HIV test results on a regular basis as a sign of good faith. Whatever you do, however, protect yourself and remember that it's better to be safe than sorry. Also, remember that people lie about their STD/HIV status, so never trust their representation, even if they show you their recent test results.
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    Oct 05, 2012 4:44 PM GMT
    I've had several fwb and it was good as it didn't set off any alarms for my mom because at that point i wasn't out to here...Now though I have state whether or not I'm 'dating' any of my male friends lolicon_lol.gif
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    Oct 06, 2012 1:18 AM GMT
    FWB comes over for PB&J only to end up with dinner & a BJ??
    Was hoping for some T&A.. icon_biggrin.gif
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    Oct 06, 2012 1:21 AM GMT
    Not at the moment... not a fan of them, unless the relationship is strictly FWB, and does't get dramatic or one of the two doesn't get attached... singlehandedly.
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    Oct 06, 2012 2:31 AM GMT
    One for each day of the week!
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    Oct 06, 2012 2:43 AM GMT
    yes, but I just didn't tell them about it. It ended rather badly.
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    Oct 06, 2012 8:08 AM GMT
    I had a couple of FB or FWB relationships before I was in a real relationship. They were great. I would highly recommend them to anyone who is not in a monogamous relationship. You get friendship, intimacy, and a safe, constant sex partner without emotional hangups or jealousy. I never experienced a downside to this kind of relationship.
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    Oct 06, 2012 8:37 AM GMT
    I have a FWB. Weird that I am actually maintaining one though. Sometimes they feel like just as much work as the real deal. But a fair trade off to have an always ready partner in crime. Funny, I tend to only have sex with guys that I could see myself dating (not that I date every guy I have sex with, it just makes me feel like a better person if I can tell myself that :winkicon_smile.gif, but I don't really feel that with my current FWB. It's just about drinking a couple of beers and then having good sex.
  • RaggedyMan

    Posts: 7185

    Oct 06, 2012 8:45 AM GMT
    I have fwob